So what's your tragic story?

[No.78]

If you were one of those typical NPCs who you bump into, they tell you your lifestory and then make you do a sidequest... What would you say?

[Mirage]

Oh, you need to get to the next area? I've got the gate keys right here in my pocket, but there is something I need a bit of help with. You see, I lost my lunch in a cave right next to that small 1200 metre volcano over there. Don't worry though, the volcano hasn't erupted more than once the past few months, I'm sure nothing will happen while you're in there.

Oh yeah, there's this little dragon in there too. Try not to bother it, it's level 159.

I'll be waiting!

[Rye]

I like this thread.

My tragic story would be about how my precious NOSEPASS was stolen by Team Rocket ne'er do wells, and how they took it into an underground dungeon to sell. :[

[Drift]

So you wanna pass? you'll have to beat 10 bajillion people before you fight me, all of them 10 levels higher than you and then you have to find my key to my room, finally you have to finish FFX-2 with ALL the endings :]

[Psychotic]

I wanted to be the guy who says "Welcome to (town name)!" but the jerks told me that position was already filled. All that was left was vague quest hint guy and armour shop guy, and I'll be damned if I sell armour for a living. Oh right, vague quest hint:

I heard strange noises coming from a cave to the southeast. Just walk left two screens and then down one screen and the cave entrance is on the right, in the forest clearing. The noises sounded like a powerful monster, and I would surely sleep at the inn and check my equipment before proceeding. Sorry I couldn't have been of more help, bro.

[Iceglow]

my story well first I'd explain that life wasn't always this easy and that monsters didn't drop money then i'd ask for something tottally useless and from that would send our young hero on his way to go help me. for thanks i'd probably be rude and tell him i could've done it quicker myself.

[Freya]

Hey adventurer! Since you're not doing anything (other than the 50 other billion quests you're on) could you deliver something for me. I really need it delivered. Fred two steps next to me needs it dearly. Then he'll make a reply and you'll have to give it back to me. THEN you'lll have to travel a very long ways and deliver it to George who will tell you to come back to me. Then once you've done that you have to kill 30 of these bad guys here. After that is done you'll have to report to George once more and then to the big city in the middle of nowhere. They'll tell you to come to me again and then we can start your quest. I really need this delivered, the world is at stake here.

[Kamiko]

I know you're probably busy saving the world and everything, but, well...
in the village down the road about, oh, 378 steps to the east, the children have gone rabid and eaten everyone.
Except me. I don't actually live in the village and the predicament of the people has nother to do with me whatsoever, but I would appreciate it if you could slay them and burn down the accursed place.
If you don't, you'll NEVER get the ultimate weapon.
Hahaha...
I mean... good luck. :D

[Mikztsu]

"WUT R U DOING HERE IN NARSCHE??"

[Ramza Beoulve]

Thank you Mario. But our princess is in another castle!

[Vikeve]

Hi I'm Hannah! What.... oh, you need to use my bathroom. Sure but before you use my bathroom you have to get bathroom key which I have hidden in a forbidden temple cursed by a powerfull dragon spirit. But you'll need a key to get into the temple and one of our castle gaurds has the key but he won't just give it to anyone. You have to give get him his favorite pillow forst eh can't go to sleep with out it. But currently his pillow is in the hands of the demonic nomads that live outside of town. So to get the pillow you'll have to save there princess who is under the spell and the final ingrediant they need for the spell is the kufujakii flower hidden within an active volcano. So you'll need special protective gear before you can go through that volano so you'll need to go to the town of *insert town* thats where they sell the equipment but the stores are closed on the count of zombies have taken over the town. So you'll have to fight off the zombies.... you got all of that?

[41-Inches-Wide]

Wu``ChaO, the song in my heart sings for you, but alas you are 3 herbs short.

[The Summoner of Leviathan]

"Oh wanderer! Seek out the guardian of the four! From whence they come return them here! First venture north to the cave of the turtle and seek his treasure!"

One series of side-quests later...

"Oh thank the heavens! Now give me the four treasures you have gathered!"

*receives the treasures*

*party acquires the ability to summon Leviathan*

[Aqua Mage]

"..."

;)

[Agrias]

"i'm sorry you have pressed an incorrect key"

:o

[oddler]

"Even though you swing your sword vigorously, it will only pass straight through us because we NPCs are ethereal."

[Christmas]

HEY *insert character name* I THINK I LIKE WITH YOUR ONLINE PERSONA WANT TO ONLINE DATE ME THEN AFTER 3 ONLINE MONTHS OF ONLINE DATING I WILL ONLINE PROPOSE TO YOU AND WE CAN GET ONLINE MARRIED AND HAVE 3 ONLINE CHILDREN AND AFTER 8 YEARS OF ONLINE HELL WE CAN GET ONLINE DIVORCED AND HAVE ONLINE COURT SETTLEMENTS FOR OUR ONLINE POSSESSIONS AND THEN WHEN YOU ARE SLEEPING IN YOUR ONLINE BED WITH YOUR NEW ONLINE PARTNER I WILL COME INTO YOUR ONLINE HOUSE AND ONLINE MURDER YOU IN BLIND ONLINE RAGE AND I WILL HAVE TO GO TO THE ONLINE ASYLUM FOR ONLINE PSYCHOPATHS WHAT DO YOU SAY MY ONLINE CHUM?

[Shlup]

http://forums.eyesonff.com/images/avatars/0/unne/arylon.gif Watch me dance! Got dollars?

[Yamaneko]

I thought it was supposed to be fictional... Shlup?

[Shlup]

Where does it say that?

[Vermachtnis]

"Yarrr I be kid napping your fair lass. Yarr she be having a bit of the dark artes. Yarr can be getting me ship back from thy ruffians who have plundered me booty! Thy ruffians make for the Cave surrounded by whirlpools in the East."
"Yarr for retrieving me ship I will bestow upon the lass the spell of the sea!" [Female Lead learns !Turbulance]

[Dr Aum]

"(The man speaks in an unintelligible gibberish, but the fact that he is holding out an empty teacup and writhing on the ground, combined with the fact that there is a large "NO DOGS, NO GREATAXES, NO DOCTORS AUM" sign on the nearby tea room house, leads you to believe that he wishes for something to ease his addiction.)"

[Lynx]

ill transport you to the next town if you can help find my car keys i know i put them on the counter and theyre not theyre FIND THOSE CAR KEYS!

[~*~Celes~*~]

Find me the one blade of grass that has more of those itty bitty microscopic insects than the rest...ready? There's the field there...go!

...while you're at it, beware...my dog decided to take a Chuck Norris over there...

[Martyr]

Hello! Like, OMG, are you really the hero!
Can you, like, dude, I mean, can you save the world and such.
Dude! My sister doesn't believe me when I say I dated you in high school. Go tell her I'm right and I'll give you the ADAMANT.

The tragedy, of course, is that two siblings can no longer trust each other. Only by reaffirming that unbreakable bond that is family ties, strong values, and the infinity of truth can you achieve the strongest material for the unyieldingly powerful weapon, Excalibur.

So go, with a symbolic gesture of perfection, achieve a 900 DMG weapon!

[Roogle]

It might go something like this.

[Madame Adequate]

Get me a love potion and give it to my <3 and I'll give you whatever reward is appropriate for your current progress through the story. :jess:

Or I'll send you out to collect twelve Wolf Spleens from the local wolves. These wolves are apparently bizarre hideous magical/genetic mutations, because only about 15% of them will have spleens.

[Anaisa]

I'd say: "I don't want to be a side character, I'm too good to be a side character, so you better take me with you wherever it is you're going, so I can be lead." "If you don't, you'll be sentencing yourself to death!" :skull:

[No.78]

HEY *insert character name* I THINK I LIKE WITH YOUR ONLINE PERSONA WANT TO ONLINE DATE ME THEN AFTER 3 ONLINE MONTHS OF ONLINE DATING I WILL ONLINE PROPOSE TO YOU AND WE CAN GET ONLINE MARRIED AND HAVE 3 ONLINE CHILDREN AND AFTER 8 YEARS OF ONLINE HELL WE CAN GET ONLINE DIVORCED AND HAVE ONLINE COURT SETTLEMENTS FOR OUR ONLINE POSSESSIONS AND THEN WHEN YOU ARE SLEEPING IN YOUR ONLINE BED WITH YOUR NEW ONLINE PARTNER I WILL COME INTO YOUR ONLINE HOUSE AND ONLINE MURDER YOU IN BLIND ONLINE RAGE AND I WILL HAVE TO GO TO THE ONLINE ASYLUM FOR ONLINE PSYCHOPATHS WHAT DO YOU SAY MY ONLINE CHUM?

"YES/NO"

No.

Lol, I made a good thread, I feel all speshal. :choc2: :choc2: :choc2: :choc2:

Please continue.

*you recieved withered bouquet*

[Bunny]

You, uh, want my set of keys so you can finish your quest? Sure man, no problem. I hate how everyone else makes you do some weird quest to get like.. a piece of wood from some forest clearing because it is somehow special. Anyway, here ya go. Good luck.

[No.78]

The keys are obviously fake.