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View Full Version : Love-heartaches fascinate me...



Peter_20
04-26-2007, 02:31 PM
Yeah, I think we've all experienced this horrible situation before: you have feelings for someone, and that someone might even be someone you don't know that well (you might just like the person's looks and his/her way of acting), and then you find out about his/her not returning your feelings, and your whole life becomes hell.
This is, IMO, pretty interesting - I mean, consider the scenario: your life is basically "indirectly controlled" by this single person, and the person's mere existence might make you stop eating, stop doing your homework, stop spending time with your friends, stop everything.
All of this just because of some person you have a sad crush on.
It's like a disease, a very serious disease.

I've luckily only had one serious heartache before, and that was for this girl whom I had known for 12 years: I'd had feelings for her all the time, and obviously they were mutual back then, but I was too shy all the time; and then I asked her out, but she was already "taken".
This was a terrible shock for me, and my life was pure hell for some time - I usually recover pretty fast, though, so I only felt crap for about one week.
Still I definitely don't wish to experience it again.

During high school I found out about this girl that felt very strong feelings for me, and she seemed affected in all sorts of ways: her whole life was "twisted", you could say, and she always seemed a bit sad.
Still sadder she became when I told her about my not returning her feelings, and then it was really obvious that she'd start crying at any moment.
We didn't know each other really well either, we were just classmates and tended to talk to each other every now and then, and still her life seemed hell - because of my existence, one could say.

I find this extremely fascinating, it's both cruel and cool all at once.
It's amazing how greatly you can affect someone's life just by... existing!

Christmas
04-26-2007, 02:43 PM
You seems to be a woman magnet or something. :bigsmile:

Bunny
04-26-2007, 02:47 PM
I like playing with heartstrings.

Owen Macwere
04-26-2007, 02:54 PM
Yes, I have loved someone and she didn't return my feelings which were horribly great that I couldn't do many things in my life without losing my touch, studies, work and even sleeping and eating. Now I think of it, it was stupid. :rolleyes2
The good part is that she loves me now like or maybe more than I love her. I think I have magic. lol

Chakan the forever man
04-26-2007, 02:57 PM
I love me. have I ever broken my own heart or let myself down? A couple of times.

Peter_20
04-26-2007, 02:58 PM
You seems to be a woman magnet or something. :bigsmile:Whence did that come from, all of a sudden? :p

Anyway, I live in a really small village where most girls are abroad and some of them have moved to America, which I must say is quite a desired country in my hometown; so it's hard to know whether I'm some "woman-magnet" or not. :monster:

Jowy
04-26-2007, 03:36 PM
It :skull::skull::skull::skull:ing sucks.

Tifa Valentine
04-26-2007, 05:59 PM
People will effect your school, social life, work and health only if you let them. If you make them you #1 priority and put so much energy into them (thinking about them, talking about them, dreaming, masturbating :tongue:, etc) then suddenly being turned down can be pretty devastating. I used to do it all the time in my pre and early teens.

But, then I realized no guy is worth crying and obsessing over because there are way too many men out there waiting in line and life's too short to go through all of them. Not to say you can't settle down one day. If you ever meet someone interesting enough who shares a good portion of your views and is able to keep you on your toes and the relationship exciting, why not?

Love is exciting and comes with both good and bad experiences. But, a lot of young people (and I'm not talking bad on every youth because I'm not that old, yet! I just turned 20) often make the mistake of turning their partner or a simple crush into their idol.

black orb
04-26-2007, 06:22 PM
>>> Love-heartaches, never happened to me since i have never been able to love anyone..

eternalshiva
04-26-2007, 06:28 PM
:( black orb /huggles That's sad ; ;

Body reacts weird when you crush on someone, takes over your life and your thoughts. I personally think it's unhealthy lol

bipper
04-26-2007, 07:04 PM
Love makes you look at someone differently; simply cause it gives you a reprise from thinking and careing soley of/for yourself.

Renmiri
04-26-2007, 08:38 PM
:( black orb /huggles That's sad ; ;

Body reacts weird when you crush on someone, takes over your life and your thoughts. I personally think it's unhealthy lol


Love makes you look at someone differently; simply cause it gives you a reprise from thinking and careing soley of/for yourself.

QFT. Definitely not healthy if it's unrequited but what can you do ? It's not like you can chose to fall in love only with the right persons... :rolleyes2

You can however, see who are the jerks that love to play with someone else's heartstrings and stay the hell away from them. This way you will never be their plaything :)

Bunny
04-26-2007, 08:39 PM
:( black orb /huggles That's sad ; ;

Body reacts weird when you crush on someone, takes over your life and your thoughts. I personally think it's unhealthy lol


Love makes you look at someone differently; simply cause it gives you a reprise from thinking and careing soley of/for yourself.

QFT. Definitely not healthy if it's unrequited but what can you do ? It's not like you can chose to fall in love only with the right persons... :rolleyes2

You can however, see who are the jerks that love to play with someone else's heartstrings and stay the hell away from them. This way you will never be their plaything :)

Did you just call me a jerk?

Renmiri
04-26-2007, 08:42 PM
Did you just call me a jerk?

Huh.. No. I thought you were kidding in your post.

But yeah, to me people who like to play with someone else's lovesick feelings are jerks

bipper
04-26-2007, 08:46 PM
Did you just call me a jerk?

Huh.. No. I thought you were kidding in your post.

But yeah, to me people who like to play with someone else's lovesick feelings are jerks

So yes, she did. And I agree. But you are a bunny, which makes this beastiality, and like a monkey once told me, ok- some come here bunny. (lol double entendre.)

Renmiri
04-26-2007, 08:47 PM
Did you just call me a jerk?

Huh.. No. I thought you were kidding in your post.

But yeah, to me people who like to play with someone else's lovesick feelings are jerks

So yes, she did. And I agree. But you are a bunny, which makes this beastiality, and like a monkey once told me, ok- some come here bunny. (lol double entendre.)
Oh well if it is with mutual consent... :p Carry on!

Bunny
04-26-2007, 08:50 PM
Did you just call me a jerk?

Huh.. No. I thought you were kidding in your post.

But yeah, to me people who like to play with someone else's lovesick feelings are jerks

Nah, it's okay. I do play with people's emotions all the time. So see, I am a massive jerk. And I have never once denied it.

Shlup
04-27-2007, 03:15 AM
I've never really had a crush on someone that didn't return my feelings. :o

My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard!

black orb
04-27-2007, 03:36 AM
:( black orb /huggles That's sad ; ;

Body reacts weird when you crush on someone, takes over your life and your thoughts. I personally think it's unhealthy lol


Love makes you look at someone differently; simply cause it gives you a reprise from thinking and careing soley of/for yourself.

QFT. Definitely not healthy if it's unrequited but what can you do ? It's not like you can chose to fall in love only with the right persons... :rolleyes2

You can however, see who are the jerks that love to play with someone else's heartstrings and stay the hell away from them. This way you will never be their plaything :)
>>> I`ve had lots of crushes, but love is a whole different thing (I guess). I have never experienced such strong feeling.

Christmas
04-27-2007, 03:51 AM
He HATES like me. :bigsmile:

Yuffie514
04-27-2007, 09:15 AM
i understand. that's why i turned to something better...

Slade
04-27-2007, 09:37 AM
Story of my life, unfortunatly.....

Oh well, one day there'll be a girl who returns my feelings. I just hope I find that someone before I'm like, 50! :jess:

Cloudane
04-27-2007, 10:59 AM
Ugh yup I totally see where you're coming from Peter.

I've had my fair share of crushes. I often end up liking the young ladies at work, which is mega mega bad bad (mixing business with pleasure is rarely a good thing, especially if they turn you down and you have to work with each other and all the awkwardness). Ironically I'm helping out my previous employer (kinda, they went bust as soon as I left haha! But some of the staff started their own company) this afternoon with the lass there who I've liked for about a year, and as we're not employed together any more I've been mulling over the idea of asking her out for a drink or something. She, and that possibility, dominated my head all of last night.

Logic says - to Hull with 'em, life's too short to spend entire nights not being motivated to do anything because you're too busy thinking what a wonderful person 'x' is when you don't even know them all that well.

However, Love and Logic are mutually exclusive, and it's usually the former that has power to override the latter, even though I'm normally a great believer in Logic and Common Sense.

Peter_20
04-27-2007, 11:33 AM
For some reason I imagine that while I can feel like this for a girl, it feels really strange that a girl that's crushing on me should walk around and feel sick all day long.
It all feels too... much, somehow.

Straight question for everyone:
could a half-acquainted girl from my class that's crushing on me really feel bad all the time?
For some reason I imagine that she would just feel bad sporadically, and spend happy times with her friends the rest of the days.

Cloudane
04-27-2007, 11:52 AM
Yeah it's just as tough when you're the subject of someone's affections and you're the one not returning it.

It's kinda freaky and a little worrying when someone obsesses over you (it's only happened to me once, mind).

I think that if you've told her that you don't feel the same way, you've done the right thing in setting her straight. But ultimately it's now her responsibility to get over you and move on. Clinging onto an unrequited love is indeed unhealthy, and it's very uncomfortable knowing that someone is harming their own life over you. But so long as you've told her, there's nothing else you can really do.

I suppose this is probably why when a girl turns a guy down, she often plays match-maker between the guy and one of her friends - to get out of that situation. You don't often see guys doing that though :p

Peter_20
04-27-2007, 12:19 PM
Heh, I dunno why, but it feels... weird that this half-acquainted girl should feel like crap just because I'm her classmate and she likes me. :rolleyes2

It really feels "too much" to be able to affect someone's feelings like that without my doing anything particular. :p

Cloudane
04-27-2007, 12:43 PM
Mm. I refer back to my point about love being illogical :D

I've had plenty of crushes, a couple of them quite serious and heart-achey, on girls who I've not really known and who have never really "done anything" as such. Based on nothing other than how they act, what I imagine they're thinking/feeling (which ironically may be far from the truth) and how they look. Just how it goes innit.

Peter_20
04-27-2007, 12:50 PM
Mm. I refer back to my point about love being illogical :D

I've had plenty of crushes, a couple of them quite serious and heart-achey, on girls who I've not really known and who have never really "done anything" as such. Based on nothing other than how they act, what I imagine they're thinking/feeling (which ironically may be far from the truth) and how they look. Just how it goes innit.Heh, I thought as much.
You actually don't need to be personally acquainted with a girl in order to fall in love with her, you basically have to like her looks and how she acts with her friends.
That's all you need to feel the heartache.

There was this girl in my high school class that made me feel weird in these sorts of ways.
She was very silent and just a tad arrogant, but not much at all.
That, combined with her cute looks and fragile body (fragile as in being slender and petite), made me feel attracted to her in a very special kind of way; it's kinda hard to put into words, really, but I'm sure you can tell what I mean. :D

The thing that hurt so much was the fact that I thought she actually liked me at first, but then grew tired of me because of my acting unsecure back then.
And then I had to see her in school everyday, acting in her cute, silent and petite way.
Meh.

Cloudane
04-27-2007, 05:52 PM
Personality is huge. Of course there's nothing like actually knowing someone (might have a personality that fits but be a psycho!) but in terms of developing crushes it doesn't take much, just the right combination of fascinating personality and reasonable looks.

Incidentally I asked out this one I was talking about today and she didn't seem to hesitate in saying 'yes' :love: I only asked casually mind, just for a drink (rather than a blatant "let's date" kind of thing) which is fine as I'm not comfortable leaping into things. I'd rather see how we get on outside of the internet first. Will be in a week or two when she's off some meds. (unless she changes her mind of course - lady's prerogative innit :)

Renmiri
04-27-2007, 06:35 PM
And then I had to see her in school everyday, acting in her cute, silent and petite way.
Meh.

Yep, that's how it feels... A bit like having stubbed your toe and trying to walk after that. A nagging pain that sometimes you forget or even get used to it. But sometimes you bump that hurt toe against something and you see stars of pain... Like if she talks to you nicely or if she doesn't respond to your "Hello" or someone gets to hug her in front of you.

But if all goes well, every day you will be feeling a little less pain, until it all goes away (thankfully!) and your toe/heart is ready for another crush. :greenie: