NeoCracker
11-24-2007, 05:04 AM
Thats right, we are a big family here at Eyes on.
And Families help eachother out. So I'm going to make a list of Tips to help improve your everyday life, even if only by a little.
The list will be updated as people post their own tips.
The List of Tips
1) When you sit down on a Toilet seat, place to strips of TP where your cheeks will go. This is not to reduce germs or anything, but it reduces the coldness of the seat, making the experience just a bit better.
2) Don't keep your kitchen stocked with things you don't intend to use. Such as spices you hate. This will give you more room for things you will use.
3) Keep all your loose change. After a while, all the loose change people loose or don't keep track of can add up. It may not be a lot, but can be used to pick up some snacks, maybe a CD or two, or even an extra game.
4) When surfing for internet Porn, make sure you have a good Anti-Virus Program on hand.
5) Befriend the cooks at your local eateries, as you may get extra food whenever you order.
6) Wash your bleepin' hands after everything you do. Even if you are sick, even if you aren't sick. Even if you have a tingle in your throat. And more importantly don't go out. It's not worth giving it to 2 million other people because you think you are some "tough guy". I hate it when people do this. Nobody wants you coughing or sneezing all over them, stay home and get some rest.
7) Save your walmart/kmart bags to put in your small room-trashcans. Saves the environment and you from having to buy trashbags or getting a nasty sticky trashcan (make sure they don't have holes in them)
8) Buy a new computer instead of that new tv, they'll both be obsolete but you'll get so much more out of the computer!
9) Clip coupons out of the sunday paper, but only if you actually buy the brands already (or it would become cheaper and worthwhile to buy them)
10) If you don't get your clothes into the clothes hamper, at least try to get them near or on it. Don't leave them wadded up in the floor, else your dogs will sleep on them and you'll never get them off.
11) ALWAYS lock your door if you're in the middle of..."stuff."
12) If you're a girl and have certain "pleasurable toys" in your room...don't leave them on your desk if you have a mom who knocks AFTER entering the room....It helps you avoid embarrassing situations in which she asks what it is, where you found it, and, "if you don't know what it is and where you found it, what do you use it for?" To which you'll reply "...I use it to get stuff off of high shelves." Yeah, uber embarrassing.
13) Don't EVER let your boyfriend buy a massaging desk chair. He'll love it a little too much.
14) It's a bad idea to touch your eye after having a jalepano pepper on your eye...wash your hands before rubbing that itchy eye. (learned this one from the boyfriend xP)
15) If your cat wants you to give him a piece of your crescent roll you're eating for breakfast, don't. He'll become addicted and give you that cute look until you give him more.
16) Don't look your cat in the eye when she's looking at you like you're her favorite mouse toy. Your face will hurt in about three seconds.
17) Sometimes it's never the right timing. Sometimes it's right timing, wrong place, wrong timing right place (etc etc).
22) Your parents will need you as much as you need/needed them.
23) Getting old isn't a death sentence.
24). start every day with an evil laugh (MUHAHAHAHA *evil* ) just to get it out of your system
25) Sand paper shouldn't be used as a masturbating aid.
26) If your friend keeps being an asshole to you, ditch the tosser. You'll feel better once he's not stabbing you in the back for cheap laughs. For the best effect, plan a healthy verbal lash out when there's a Friday the 13th coming up.
27) Don't eat the Yellow Snow
28) Never trust cell phone companies. They hire retarded monkeys and they hate all of their customers.
29) Don’t worry about the future; or worry, but know that worrying is as
effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing
bubblegum.
30) Remember the compliments you receive, forget the insults.
31) Enjoy your body,
use it every way you can…don’t be afraid of it, or what other people
think of it, it’s the greatest instrument you’ll ever
own.
32) Do something that scares you everyday.
33) But if I could offer you one tip for the future, not listening to a song about sunscreen would be it.
And Families help eachother out. So I'm going to make a list of Tips to help improve your everyday life, even if only by a little.
The list will be updated as people post their own tips.
The List of Tips
1) When you sit down on a Toilet seat, place to strips of TP where your cheeks will go. This is not to reduce germs or anything, but it reduces the coldness of the seat, making the experience just a bit better.
2) Don't keep your kitchen stocked with things you don't intend to use. Such as spices you hate. This will give you more room for things you will use.
3) Keep all your loose change. After a while, all the loose change people loose or don't keep track of can add up. It may not be a lot, but can be used to pick up some snacks, maybe a CD or two, or even an extra game.
4) When surfing for internet Porn, make sure you have a good Anti-Virus Program on hand.
5) Befriend the cooks at your local eateries, as you may get extra food whenever you order.
6) Wash your bleepin' hands after everything you do. Even if you are sick, even if you aren't sick. Even if you have a tingle in your throat. And more importantly don't go out. It's not worth giving it to 2 million other people because you think you are some "tough guy". I hate it when people do this. Nobody wants you coughing or sneezing all over them, stay home and get some rest.
7) Save your walmart/kmart bags to put in your small room-trashcans. Saves the environment and you from having to buy trashbags or getting a nasty sticky trashcan (make sure they don't have holes in them)
8) Buy a new computer instead of that new tv, they'll both be obsolete but you'll get so much more out of the computer!
9) Clip coupons out of the sunday paper, but only if you actually buy the brands already (or it would become cheaper and worthwhile to buy them)
10) If you don't get your clothes into the clothes hamper, at least try to get them near or on it. Don't leave them wadded up in the floor, else your dogs will sleep on them and you'll never get them off.
11) ALWAYS lock your door if you're in the middle of..."stuff."
12) If you're a girl and have certain "pleasurable toys" in your room...don't leave them on your desk if you have a mom who knocks AFTER entering the room....It helps you avoid embarrassing situations in which she asks what it is, where you found it, and, "if you don't know what it is and where you found it, what do you use it for?" To which you'll reply "...I use it to get stuff off of high shelves." Yeah, uber embarrassing.
13) Don't EVER let your boyfriend buy a massaging desk chair. He'll love it a little too much.
14) It's a bad idea to touch your eye after having a jalepano pepper on your eye...wash your hands before rubbing that itchy eye. (learned this one from the boyfriend xP)
15) If your cat wants you to give him a piece of your crescent roll you're eating for breakfast, don't. He'll become addicted and give you that cute look until you give him more.
16) Don't look your cat in the eye when she's looking at you like you're her favorite mouse toy. Your face will hurt in about three seconds.
17) Sometimes it's never the right timing. Sometimes it's right timing, wrong place, wrong timing right place (etc etc).
22) Your parents will need you as much as you need/needed them.
23) Getting old isn't a death sentence.
24). start every day with an evil laugh (MUHAHAHAHA *evil* ) just to get it out of your system
25) Sand paper shouldn't be used as a masturbating aid.
26) If your friend keeps being an asshole to you, ditch the tosser. You'll feel better once he's not stabbing you in the back for cheap laughs. For the best effect, plan a healthy verbal lash out when there's a Friday the 13th coming up.
27) Don't eat the Yellow Snow
28) Never trust cell phone companies. They hire retarded monkeys and they hate all of their customers.
29) Don’t worry about the future; or worry, but know that worrying is as
effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing
bubblegum.
30) Remember the compliments you receive, forget the insults.
31) Enjoy your body,
use it every way you can…don’t be afraid of it, or what other people
think of it, it’s the greatest instrument you’ll ever
own.
32) Do something that scares you everyday.
33) But if I could offer you one tip for the future, not listening to a song about sunscreen would be it.