Things FF Villains Would Never Say

[Forsaken Lover]

Sephiroth to Cloud: I wish I knew how to quit you!

Seymour: Me and Sin are going to have a magical tea party. I have all the time in the world!

Shuyin: Lenne, i want a divorce.

Garland(FF1): I shall help you all back up!

And now its your turn. Go nuts.

[blackmage_nuke]

"Kefka, what does the scan spell say about his MP level?"
"IT'S OVER 9000!!!!!!"

[NeoCracker]

Garland(FF1): I shall help you all back up!


Epic.

[TyphoonThaReapa]

Ultimecia: "I have enough power of Kompress time and space...and yet I have no purpose..."

Sephiroth: "You got me Cloud....you got me..."

Jecht Final Aeon: "...Well Tidus, I hate you to bitch..."

Kefka: "...What's so damn funny?!"

[Goldenboko]

Sephiroth: I think I'm going to go get a haircut.

Kuja: I want to have sex with a woman! Being mainly is cool!

Kefka: Wait, thats not actually funny.....

Zemus: Being different is good :bigsmile:

[Bahamut2000X]

I love the Garland and Zemus lobing in this thread already. :D

Emperor (FF II): I have come back from hell as it's new lord to deliver this message to you mortals!!!!.....We're offering inexpensive condos in hell now, with a wonder view of the river Styx. We have a 4 man party joint lease option available too!

[Comet]

Kefka - 'Go away, I'm not in a good mood.'

Ultimecia - 'I will achive time compression. Curse these seeds.'

Sephiroth - 'A meteor? You mean those things in space?'

[f f freak]

Ultimecia: Hahahahahaha!!! I fooled all of you foolish gamers. I am really... *Pulls of mask* Future Esthar!

[Bahamut2000X]

Ultimecia: Hahahahahaha!!! I fooled all of you foolish gamers. I am really... *Pulls of mask* Future Esthar!

Psssh saw it coming. :p

[Forsaken Lover]

Jenova: It's time for some sweet tentacle action with my favorite son.

Seifer: Squall...I will tell you about my ROMANTIC dream. It involves you and me and our gunblades are drawn.....
*yaoi fangirl heads explode*

Queen Brahne: After I rule the world, I think I'll watch my carb intake more closely.

Yunalesca: As if I need to change into Madusa's head to win this. *pulls off top* I just rendered all the men in your party with the ultimate status effect: Boner which keeps them from moving for the rest of the fight.
(obligatory Tidus insult)
Tidus: Your boobs don't have any effect on me!
Yunalesca: What? Meg Ryan?! IMPOSSIBLE!!

And I'm done for now.

[The Crystal]

Kuja: Ugh! I look like an homo!

Sephiroth in ACC: Why I'm not flying in circles?

[Remedy]

Vaan: now i wanna be like Jack Sparrow.

[Jessweeee♪]

Jenova: It's time for some sweet tentacle action with my favorite son.

Seifer: Squall...I will tell you about my ROMANTIC dream. It involves you and me and our gunblades are drawn.....
*yaoi fangirl heads explode*

Queen Brahne: After I rule the world, I think I'll watch my carb intake more closely.

Yunalesca: As if I need to change into Madusa's head to win this. *pulls off top* I just rendered all the men in your party with the ultimate status effect: Boner which keeps them from moving for the rest of the fight.
(obligatory Tidus insult)
Tidus: Your boobs don't have any effect on me!
Yunalesca: What? Meg Ryan?! IMPOSSIBLE!!

And I'm done for now.

xDDD

Ultimecia: FUSHIFURU

[Bahamut2000X]

Zande: I don't want to be a wizard. What I really wanna do is tap dance!

http://i58.photobucket.com/albums/g269/bahamut2000x/Zande1648.gif

Zemus: I wish I was cool like Zande. :cry:

[Goldenboko]

Seifer: I feel pretty,
Oh so pretty,


I feel pretty and witty and gay,

And I pitty,
Any girl who isnt me today,

I feel charming,
Oh so charming,
It's alarming how charming I feel,

And so pretty that I hardly believe I'm real,

See that pretty girl in that mirror there?
Who can that attractive girl be?
What a pretty face!
What a pretty dress!
What a pretty smile!
What a pretty meeeeeeeeeeee~!

I feel stunning,
And entrancing!
Feel like running and dancing for joy!
For I'm loved by a pretty wonderful boy!

[Forsaken Lover]

Squall's a villain?

[Bahamut2000X]

He's fairly emo, so close enough. :monster:

[Goldenboko]

Squall's a villain?

Oops, I wrote Squall Dx I was going to put Siefer. I consider him a villain.

[qwertysaur]

Necron: SURPRISE!!!!!


Dr. Cid: Why wont my sun love me:cry:

[Jessweeee♪]

Necron: SURPRISE!!!!!


Dr. Cid: Why wont my sun son love me:cry:

[Bahamut2000X]

Zeromus: I am the hate filled soul of Zemus reborn into a new form! THE DEATH MOP!!!!!

[Forsaken Lover]

Squall's a villain?

Oops, I wrote Squall Dx I was going to put Siefer. I consider him a villain.

So do I. ^^

Adel: Why does everyone think I'm a man?

[Jessweeee♪]

Adel: I am not a tennis player ; ;

[Bahamut2000X]

GB likes to be unique eh? :p

Since Adel is the 'in thing' now.

Adel: I never wanted to be a stinkin' sorceress, I really wanted to be in the WNBA.

[Jessweeee♪]

Adel: I am not a transvestite clown ; ;

[Goldenboko]

GB likes to be unique eh? :p

Since Adel is the 'in thing' now.

Adel: I never wanted to be a stinkin' sorceress, I really wanted to be in the WNBA.

What are you talking about :shifty: (:mwahaha:)

This one should count though because it has to do with a villian :p

*Yu-Yevon appears*
*Tidus graps a fork*
Tidus: Anyone like calamari?
Yu-Yevon: :laughing:

[Roto13]

OMG let's think of characteristics of Final Fantasy villains and say stuff that is the opposite of that! It'll be hilarious and fresh and new and clever!

[Goldenboko]

OMG let's think of characteristics of Final Fantasy villains and say stuff that is the opposite of that! It'll be hilarious and fresh and new and clever!

OMG! People are trying to have fun! Let's go rain on their parade.


Traslation: GTFO >:0

[Bahamut2000X]

Oh your no fun Roto.

[Jessweeee♪]

die plz

[Goldenboko]

die plz

xD A bit extreme there?

[Jessweeee♪]

You all know I'm kidding!


































:shifty:

[NeoCracker]

Roto13: I'm sorry, I didn't mean to be so cranky. I just can't control the anger sometimes because I feel inadequate compared to you guys. :(

[Forsaken Lover]

Genesis: Gackt? Who's that?
Kadaj: So, did Nomura just totally run out of original character design ideas?

[Vivisteiner]

Kuja to Zidane:

At first I was afraid I was petrified
Kept thinkin' I could never live without you by my side;
But then I spent so many nights
Thinkin' how you did me wrong
And I grew strong
And so you're back from outer space
I just walked in to find you here with that sad look upon your face
I should have changed that stupid lock
I should have made you leave your key
If I'd've known for just one second you'd back to bother me
Go on now, go walk out the door
Just turn around now
('cause) you're not welcome anymore
Weren't you the one who tried to hurt me with goodbye
Did I crumble
Did you think I'd lay down and die?
Oh no, not.I. I will survive
Oh as long as I know how to love I know I'll stay alive;
I've got all my life to live,
I've got all my love to give and I'll survive,
I will survive. Hey hey.
It took all the strength I had not to fall apart
Kept trying' hard to mend the pieces of my broken heart,
And I spent oh so many nights
Just feeling sorry for myself. I used to cry
But now I hold my head up high
And you see me somebody new
I'm not that chained up little person still in love with you,
And so you feel like droppin' in
And just expect me to be free,
Now I'm savin' all my lovin' for someone who's lovin' me
Go on now..




Seymour to the party after their millionth battle:
Well, you can tell by the way I use my walk,
I'm a woman's man, no time to talk.
Music loud and women warm.
I've been kicked around since I was born.
And now it's all right, it's O.K.
And you may look the other way.
We can try to understand
The New York Times' effect on man.
Whether you're a brother
Or whether you're a mother,
You're stayin' alive, stayin' alive.
Feel the city breakin'
And ev'rybody shakin'
And we're stayin' alive, stayin' alive.
Ah, ha, ha, ha,
Stayin' alive.
Stayin' alive.
Ah, ha, ha, ha,
Stayin' alive.
Well now, I get low and I get high
And if I can't get either I really try.
Got the wings of heaven on my shoes
I'm a dancin' man and I just can't lose.
You know it's all right, it's O.K.
I'll live to see another day.
We can try to understand
The New York Times' effect on man.
Whether you're a brother
Or whether you're a mother,
You're stayin' alive, stayin' alive.
Feel the city breakin'
And ev'rybody shakin'
And we're stayin' alive, stayin' alive.
Ah, ha, ha, ha,
Stayin' alive.
Stayin' alive.
Ah, ha, ha, ha,
Stayin' alive.
Life goin' nowhere.
Somebody help me.
Somebody help me, yeah.
Life goin' nowhere.
Somebody help me, yeah.
Stayin' alive
Well, you can tell by the way I use my walk,
I'm a woman's man, no time to talk.
Music loud and women warm.
I've been kicked around since I was born.
And now it's all right, it's O.K.
And you may look the other way.
We can try to understand
The New York Times' effect on man.
Whether you're a brother
Or whether you're a mother,
You're stayin' alive, stayin' alive.
Feel the city breakin'
And ev'rybody shakin'
And we're stayin' alive, stayin' alive.
Ah, ha, ha, ha,
Stayin' alive.
Stayin' alive.
Ah, ha, ha, ha,
Stayin' alive.
Life goin' nowhere.
Somebody help me.
Somebody help me, yeah.
Life goin' nowhere.
Somebody help me, yeah.
Stayin' alive
Life goin' nowhere.
Somebody help me.
Somebody help me, yeah.
Life goin' nowhere.
Somebody help me, yeah.
Stayin' alive


Sephiroth to Cloud: I am your father.


Squall to Sorceress Adel:

Spy on me baby use satellite
Infrared to see me move through the night
Aim gonna fire shoot me right
I'm gonna like the way you fight

Now you found the secret code I use
to wash away my lonely blues
So I can't deny or lie cause you're
the only one to make me fly.

Chorus:
Sexbomb Sexbomb you're a Sexbomb
You can give it to me, when I need to come along
Sexbomb sexbomb you're my sexbomb
And baby you can turn me on.

No don't get me wrong ain't gonna do you no harm (no)
This bomb's for lovin' and you can shoot it far
I'm your main target come and help me ignite
Love struck holding you tight.

Make me explode although you know
the route to go to sex me slow
And yes, I must react to claims of those
who say that you are not all that.

2x Chorus:

(Break)
You can give me more and more counting up the score
You can turn me upside down and inside out
You can make me feel the real deal
And I can give it to you any time because you're mine

Chorus:
Sexbomb Sexbomb you're a Sexbomb
You can give it to me, when I need to be turned on

Sexbomb Sexbomb you're my Sexbomb
And baby you can turn me on. 8x

[Avarice-ness]

Kefka: I'm sorry I destroyed the world, and to make my wrongs a right I'm going to start an orphanage for puppies and give every person still alive a puppy until everyone has one. And then, oh great heros, you may put me in jail and execute me, but promise me one thing. Take care of my puppies. Puppies need love too. :(

[Heath]

Ultimecia: So y'know, once upon a time my name was Rinoa.

[Bahamut2000X]

Genesis: Gackt? Who's that?
Kadaj: So, did Nomura just totally run out of original character design ideas?

That was called Final Fantasy VIII. ZING! :monster:

[Forsaken Lover]

lol Indeed.

President Shinra to Rufus: I am your father.

Rufus: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!

...wait....yes.

Hojo: I had sex with Lucrecia ya know. Everyone thinks I'm a freaky mad scientist and maybe I used some kinda sciencey non-sex method but me and her GOT. IT. ON. WOOOOO-EEEEE!

Yu Yevon: How am I, a master summoner who makes the most powerful monster in existence, not capable of killing some guy with what looks to be a soccer ball and a 16-year-old girl with...wait, what kind of weapon is that anyway?

[blackmage_nuke]

Kefka: I'm sorry I destroyed the world, and to make my wrongs a right I'm going to start an orphanage for puppies and give every person still alive a puppy until everyone has one. And then, oh great heros, you may put me in jail and execute me, but promise me one thing. Take care of my puppies. Puppies need love too. :(

Little do they know

http://www.videogamesprites.net/FinalFantasy6/Enemies/Bogy.gifhttp://www.videogamesprites.net/FinalFantasy6/Enemies/Garm.gif

[Avarice-ness]

Kefka: I'm sorry I destroyed the world, and to make my wrongs a right I'm going to start an orphanage for puppies and give every person still alive a puppy until everyone has one. And then, oh great heros, you may put me in jail and execute me, but promise me one thing. Take care of my puppies. Puppies need love too. :(

Little do they know

http://www.videogamesprites.net/FinalFantasy6/Enemies/Bogy.gifhttp://www.videogamesprites.net/FinalFantasy6/Enemies/Garm.gif

xD Shh. Twas a seeecreett.

[Takara]

Adel: "I wanted to be a ballerina!" ;_;

[Roto13]

Ultimecia: So y'know, once upon a time my name was Rinoa.

... Ok, that one didn't suck.

[Forsaken Lover]

Ultimecia: So y'know, once upon a time my name was Rinoa.

... Ok, that one didn't suck.

It blew.

[jammi567]

Vayne: Yeah, lets get this fuc*ing party started! *rubs himself against Vaan's ass*

[Sephiroththegreat]

Kadaj to Cloud

Some people say that I'm a bad guy
They may be right, they may be right!
But its not as if I dont try
I just fuck up!
Try as I might.
But I can change, I can change!!!
I can learn to keep my promises, I swear it!
I'll open up my heart and I will share it!
Any minute now I will be born again!
Yes I can change, I can change!!!
I know I've been a dirty little bastard
La la la la la lalala!
*hectic*
I like to kill, I like to mate, a seventh saint, but ITS OK
CAUSE I CAN CHANGE!!!!!!!
*sigh*
Its not my fault that Im so evil
Its society, society.
You see, my parents were sometimes abusive
And it made a prick of me!
But I can change, I can change!
I can learn to keep my promises I know it!
La la la la la lalala!!
I'll open up my heart and I will show it!
Any minute now I will be born again!
Satan: But what if you never change?
What if you remain a sandy little butthole?
Saddam:Hey Satan!
Dont be such a twit
Mother Teresa wont have :skull::skull::skull::skull: on me!
Just watch, just watch me change here I go Im changing!!!
Hey!
HEY HEY HEY HEY HEY HEY HEY HEY!!!
Ah!
*whistling solo*
Dee da tlee ta tlee ta tlee tlaa tlaa...
Heeeeeeey Satan!
:skull::skull::skull::skull::skull::skull::skull::skull: language=JavaScript src="../../ringdown_song.js"></SCRIPT>

[FallenSilence]

Kuja: Crap. I left the house without my trousers again...