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View Full Version : Boys love their moms, girls love their dads



Avarice-ness
03-08-2008, 01:41 AM
So, do you believe that it's true that when you date, you date someone:
Girl - Like your father
Boy - Like your mother

Apparently, males are naturally attuned to date someone who reminds them of their mother and vice versa for females.

My sister found this to be true like 6 years after marriage, basically my brother in law put up christmas lights and admired them in a very weird way that only our dad used to do. (He stood in the backyard and admired how their house looked from the back... not the front)
My boyfriend is so much like my dad it's -creepy-, he tries to play fight with me, he's a practical joker, he finds purposely stupid movies to be the best thing ever, and he even snores like my dad. *points at bed* I'm having flashbacks of hearing my dad snoring from a room over now, it's terrifying.

So! Have you dated anyone that was like your respective parent (father or mother)? Do you feel that those are the best people to date? How to you feel about the basic theory that people date their father or mother in a younger form?

Rye
03-08-2008, 01:54 AM
Now, Freud and I are bffs, we have regular sleep overs and we give each others mani-pedis while discussing cute boys and the Oedipal Syndrome/Electra Complex, but I don't find that to be true for me.

My boyfriend (intelligent, well read, open minded, artistically inclined) is pretty much the exact opposite of my father. And I quite like it that way.

Aerith's Knight
03-08-2008, 02:03 AM
*thinks*

...

0_0

Medi
03-08-2008, 02:09 AM
Well, if I were to date someone like my mother, I'd be dating a racist and homophobic slob, so basically no. The thought disgusts me. My primary female role model, instead of my mother, would probably be my sister Julia, age 24. She's so intellectual and does a lot of humanitarian work, and she's not a complete bigot. So I could see myself dating someone similar to my sister.

This theory must really be situational, but I can see how this may be the case for many other folks.

Caraliz
03-08-2008, 02:10 AM
i once dated a guy that reminded me a little of my dad (socially retarded, slow, and didn't know how to handle things) and it annoyed me endlessly. now i date someone that's totally chill and calm and he handles himself and situations to do with me with grace. i love him. he is nothing like my father.

Captain Maxx Power
03-08-2008, 02:17 AM
Both my parents are really awesome people. I wouldn't mind going out with anyone with the positive traits of my mum. I'd actually count myself lucky if I did. I do think though Freud suggested that we don't just want someone like our mum/dad; we WANT our mum/dad i.e. we're actually obsessed with them and that follows through into our adult life. By that standard I'm the complete opposite; my mum's about twice my size and I prefer smaller, petite women.

Araciel
03-08-2008, 02:18 AM
She's female.

LunarWeaver
03-08-2008, 02:19 AM
Thank the sweet talking horse Ed this is not true. I would not even be in the presence of anybody remotely like my parents. I honestly don't think Freud ever knows wtf he's talking about :jess:

CimminyCricket
03-08-2008, 02:22 AM
The girl I'm currently with is unlike either of my parents, or anyone that I've ever met. So, no!

Madame Adequate
03-08-2008, 02:23 AM
Now, Freud and I are bffs, we have regular sleep overs and we give each others mani-pedis while discussing cute boys and the Oedipal Syndrome/Electra Complex, but I don't find that to be true for me.

My boyfriend (intelligent, well read, open minded, artistically inclined) is pretty much the exact opposite of my father. And I quite like it that way.

However, some Freudians argue that by going out with someone opposite to your parent, you're still wanting to go after your parent, and still being defined by them.

I think that's useless logic, myself. Whatever you do, Freudians find a way to explain it in terms of your parents, no matter how tenuous.

Shiny
03-08-2008, 02:25 AM
Meh. I think people are subconsciously prone to date people that remind them of their parents whether they like it or not. But also think there's others who are prone to stay away from people who remind them of their parents as well.

Rye
03-08-2008, 02:27 AM
Now, Freud and I are bffs, we have regular sleep overs and we give each others mani-pedis while discussing cute boys and the Oedipal Syndrome/Electra Complex, but I don't find that to be true for me.

My boyfriend (intelligent, well read, open minded, artistically inclined) is pretty much the exact opposite of my father. And I quite like it that way.

However, some Freudians argue that by going out with someone opposite to your parent, you're still wanting to go after your parent, and still being defined by them.

I think that's useless logic, myself. Whatever you do, Freudians find a way to explain it in terms of your parents, no matter how tenuous.

And how does that make you feel?

KentaRawr!
03-08-2008, 02:35 AM
Well, I wouldn't mind dating someone like my Mom. She's nice! My Sister doesn't like our father much, but she does have occasional musical talks with him, and they joke around sometimes. None of her BF's have reminded me of Poppy, though...

Momiji
03-08-2008, 04:21 AM
So, do you believe that it's true that when you date, you date someone:
Girl - Like your father
Boy - Like your mother

Apparently, males are naturally attuned to date someone who reminds them of their mother and vice versa for females.

My sister found this to be true like 6 years after marriage, basically my brother in law put up christmas lights and admired them in a very weird way that only our dad used to do. (He stood in the backyard and admired how their house looked from the back... not the front)
My boyfriend is so much like my dad it's -creepy-, he tries to play fight with me, he's a practical joker, he finds purposely stupid movies to be the best thing ever, and he even snores like my dad. *points at bed* I'm having flashbacks of hearing my dad snoring from a room over now, it's terrifying.

So! Have you dated anyone that was like your respective parent (father or mother)? Do you feel that those are the best people to date? How to you feel about the basic theory that people date their father or mother in a younger form?

I would never date someone like my mom. No. Ugh...no.

Chemical
03-08-2008, 05:13 AM
I have unconditional attachment to my mother.
Does this mean I want to find a man like her?

Araciel
03-08-2008, 05:24 AM
I have unconditional attachment to my mother.
Does this mean I want to find a man like her?

It's so over.

Arc_Master_14
03-08-2008, 05:46 AM
When my moms being bitchy shes like one of my ex girlfriends who was always bitchy.... She's still my friend though she wont LEAVE ME ALONE! he he he

rubah
03-08-2008, 05:57 AM
Stu is protective and tells me when things aren't good for me a lot like my dad does.

Miriel
03-08-2008, 06:05 AM
My Dad is short, Asian, a Minister (and therefore religious), loves to meet people, make connections, buy things, and basically create an empire. My Dad also likes to talk, a LOT.

Boyfriend is tall, white, not religious at all, doesn't care about influencing other people or whether is watch is a Rolex, and he doesn't care about being famous. And he lets me run my mouth off and rant a whole lot and is an amazing listener.

Both my Dad and my Boyfriend love me and spoil me and so in that regard, they are very similar.

Also, I tend to be veeeery similar to my dad. I want an empire too.

hhr1dluv
03-08-2008, 06:18 AM
I believe we are genetically programmed to find attractive what our parents found attractive. How to explain this...Okay, let's say my mom was attracted to my dad's prematurely graying hair (she thought he looked distinguished). That means that, when they got together and had me, I have genes to produce boys who might have prematurely gray hair, and genes that make me attracted to that hair. Obviously there are many variables and whatnot, but that's probably where the initial thread idea comes from. We are attracted to what our mothers/fathers were attracted to, as we are made from them.

As for wanting a boy like my dad...there are many times where my dad annoys the crap out of me...I don't think I'd ever be attracted to a man who had my dad's exact personality. But who knows? My opinion might change. However, I would say that there are probably basic physical appearance things that are similar (height, ruggedness, etc.)

IronOcean
03-08-2008, 06:50 AM
my brother is a member of this forum and he will agree or already has he has replied already. and thank the gods on high this is not true because we would hate life if we had to be around them. i graduated high school and havent been back except for two x/mas's lol but my mother has taught me what to look for.....the other direction, but! not eveyone is the same so i cannot speak for others.

Sarc the Swordsman
03-08-2008, 10:38 AM
I suppose it depends on the situation, or just by chance. Of all the girls I've dated, I can't really say many of them are like my mum. Sure, one or two traits might be the same...but personally, it's a little weird to be like 'my girlfriend is just like my mummy!'

Though, my recent ex shared my mums hardworking nature and fiery temper. >_>

Montoya
03-08-2008, 10:48 AM
My ex used to say that I reminded her of her dad, and after some thought she reminded me of my mom. But she didn't like her dad, and my mom doesn't like me (joke) so things didn't work out.

Cz
03-08-2008, 02:15 PM
My mother's a wonderful person. So insofar as I like wonderful people, I suppose I looks for my mother's qualities in a girl. I definitely wouldn't say it's a universal thing, though. I can think of numerous counter-examples among the people I know.

TyphoonThaReapa
03-08-2008, 02:31 PM
So, do you believe that it's true that when you date, you date someone:
Girl - Like your father
Boy - Like your mother

Apparently, males are naturally attuned to date someone who reminds them of their mother and vice versa for females.

My sister found this to be true like 6 years after marriage, basically my brother in law put up christmas lights and admired them in a very weird way that only our dad used to do. (He stood in the backyard and admired how their house looked from the back... not the front)
My boyfriend is so much like my dad it's -creepy-, he tries to play fight with me, he's a practical joker, he finds purposely stupid movies to be the best thing ever, and he even snores like my dad. *points at bed* I'm having flashbacks of hearing my dad snoring from a room over now, it's terrifying.

So! Have you dated anyone that was like your respective parent (father or mother)? Do you feel that those are the best people to date? How to you feel about the basic theory that people date their father or mother in a younger form?

Hell no!!!:eep:

Blue Harvest
03-08-2008, 02:35 PM
I hate my mother with a firey passion that consumes my soul, so no.

Avarice-ness
03-08-2008, 02:40 PM
My ex used to say that I reminded her of her dad, and after some thought she reminded me of my mom. But she didn't like her dad, and my mom doesn't like me (joke) so things didn't work out.

xD As bad as this is, one of my best friends from elementary school ended up dating a guy who was abusive to her, ironically she didn't really see as much of an issue with it as everyone else did because her father was abusive as well.

So it's more like a familiarity thing, even if there is negativity within it.

Balzac
03-08-2008, 03:59 PM
All the girls I've dated have been nothing like my mum. So I don't think it's true in any way.

Khaotic
03-08-2008, 04:02 PM
Uh, I'd never want to date someone who reminds me of my mom... for both mental reasons.. and physical.

~*~Celes~*~
03-08-2008, 04:02 PM
I have found that Alan does, indeed, resemble my dad in a few ways.

positive:
-Want to spoil me
-Tell me when I'm making a bad decision or a good one
-Support me in everything I do (except, dad doesn't support my move to England.)
-Love to have intellectual conversations with me
-Like to work with their hands
-Love their significant others for who they are and think they're beautiful, despite their weight problems
-LOVE video games

Negatives:
-Stubborn as hell.
-Never seem to have plans work out the way they want =\
-Don't like each other very much (Alan's stealing his "baby girl" away, Dad spends his money unwisely and takes it out on me...Alan doesn't like this because it makes me upset, which then makes him mad at my dad)

Thank god they share more positives than negatives.

mooglebunni608
03-08-2008, 04:03 PM
Not true with me, that's for sure. My ex was a rebel, Loverboy is a rebel, all the people I am attracted to are as different from people in my family as anyone could imagine.

Peegee
03-08-2008, 04:17 PM
She's female.

So is your mother. I think.

This is an interesting topic. Personally I try to find girls who are dynamic opposites from my mother -- outgoing, liberal, atheist, NOT INSANE, NOT RACIST, NOT HOMOPHOBIC. I do this for the obvious reason that I have major problems with agreeing with the values my mother holds, and so it affects the way I view girls.

Quindiana Jones
03-08-2008, 09:51 PM
My girlfriend has a penis just like my daddy's. It's way hot.

TyphoonThaReapa
03-08-2008, 10:03 PM
My girlfriend has a penis just like my daddy's. It's way hot.

That's just wrong son...

Ouch!
03-08-2008, 10:44 PM
My girlfriend has a penis just like my daddy's. It's way hot.

That's just wrong son...
With your sexy girl bits
And your sexy many bits too
Even you must be into you

I suppose I'd be okay with dating someone like my mom. I can't say any of my previous girlfriends were much like her at all. I was extremely attracted to a friend of mine who mothers the hell out of me, but that's about it.

Avarice-ness
03-09-2008, 09:10 AM
I can't say that my boyfriend is COMPLETELY like my dad. But he's more like the fun, rebelious, wanna-be-a-kid-even-though-I'm-getting-old part of my dad.

My dad has two extreme sides, one that's hard working where he'll sacrifice family time to work to keep the family going and one where he's just like your best friend.
I guess for me I always like the fun side of my dad 'cause when I was a kid my dad would always be gone for like months at a time (and even now years at a time) due to work. And even two years ago there would be times he'd have to drop our plans to go out to eat because he had to go check on a rig and it's parts.

My boyfriend has like, no hardworking bone in his body.

Aerith's Knight
03-09-2008, 09:18 AM
I think the way my big sister used to spoil me, she ruined other women for me xD

doesnt keep me from searching though.

prob the same thing happens to my little sister now, as i spoil her in about every way possible.

cant help it.

Rianoa
03-11-2008, 11:14 PM
Ive never tested that theory my dad died before i could test it lol

Bakamut
03-12-2008, 12:46 PM
I've never dated anybody like my father, nor have I ever been interested in anyone like him. I don't want to be like either of my parents, ever. I don't like the way they think or do things. I wouldn't want to date anybody like my dad because he's a bit sexist and thinks that the woman should do all the work around the house, and do all the work with the kid while he just sits around watching TV. He's also very critical, and never has any compliments to give anybody. Instead, all he does is complain which makes him very unpleasant to be around. He's always telling me how much he loves me, but complains about virtually everything I do. I don't like being around him, so I can't imagine ever wanting to go out with someone like him.