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View Full Version : Perfect gold-digger removal strategy



Flying Mullet
06-14-2008, 01:14 AM
I just devised a fool-proof strategy for those older fellers who need to protect themselves from gold-diggers. This inspiration came from a Canadian drug store spam email I received the other day. They were advertising Viagra for $2 a pill or something. I figure that they'll need Viagra at least twice a day, since they're dirty, old men. That's $1,460 a year, but I'm rounding up to $1,500 because it's not hard to throw in some three-peats every once in a while. Now, if she's with him for the money, she won't like him spending all this money on Viagra which could be spent on her and she'll leave him and he'll be free of that varmint. If she stays, it means she likes him and he's living the good life of needing 2-3 Viagra's a day.

I should totally copyright this and get on the late-night infomercial circuit and make some money doing this.

Tavrobel
06-14-2008, 01:17 AM
This plan of yours is like the air bags in a car. It is best supplemented by way of seatbelts pre-nuptials.

Bahamut2000X
06-14-2008, 01:42 AM
Now, if she's with him for the money, she won't like him spending all this money on Viagra which could be spent on her and she'll leave him and he'll be free of that varmint.

That logic if fail! Viagra is for the ladies. You know nothing of love Mullet. :mad2:

Flying Mullet
06-14-2008, 01:53 AM
You know nothing of love Mullet. :mad2:
http://www.pipes.org/Ephemeris/ea72/ea72a9.gif

Bahamut2000X
06-14-2008, 03:24 AM
Are they....naked? :eek:

Roxxas
06-14-2008, 05:03 AM
I have the ultimate gold digger safety strategy. I spend all my money on video games.

Peegee
06-14-2008, 06:37 AM
I have the ultimate gold digger safety strategy. I spend all my money on video games.

Exactly. I spend money on friends but not girlfriends until they show that they are worth it.

Avarice-ness
06-14-2008, 06:47 AM
I remember when my husband signed up for the army and I quit my job (AKA stopped going) and we were in Best Buy and I was all "Oh I like this and this and this and this" and then he was all "GOSH YOU GOLD DIGGER" and then I'm all "Wtf are you talking about" "I'm just kidding~" and then he like.. grabs some game strategy guide and..

god, does the thing 5 year olds do. Where they just sit and look at something, then look up at you, then go back to looking at it. Yeah so I'm like "Do you want that?" "Yes? =D?" "Gimmie that *takes guide* And you're saying I'M the gold digger!"

Yeah, I'm amused by the concept of gold diggers. I could seriously see some 20 year old chick going after my dad though, and my dad falling for it no less. I have -extreme- problems with my dad dating people who are after his money because it's happened before. But my method to prevent gold diggers from eating my daddy and his heart and money is:

BEAT THE CHICK INTO A BLOODY PULP.

Gogo
06-14-2008, 11:32 AM
Well there goes my future plans :eep:

Randgris
06-14-2008, 03:29 PM
Why don't you just claim bankrupt? As long as she thinks you don't have the dough, she'll leave you alone.

Quindiana Jones
06-14-2008, 04:26 PM
Just shoot Heather Mills in the face. Kill the General, rout the troops.

Blue Harvest
06-14-2008, 04:38 PM
Shame Paul McCartney never had the bankrupcy idea. Woulda saved him giving settlement money to that skank.

Caraliz
06-14-2008, 10:22 PM
i thought about giving bobby viagra once. :greenie:

Quindiana Jones
06-14-2008, 10:43 PM
i thought about giving bobby viagra once. :greenie:

:crying: