The Space Pope
08-01-2009, 01:08 AM
Greetings, humans. I have come forth today to tell you an amazing tale of change, love, God, and the consequences of walking into a plastic surgeon's office shortly after ingesting vast quantities of LSD.
As may know by now, my true form is an entity of pure energy, but the problem is, I cannot determine what I transform into, it just sorta happens for reasons so painfully complicated that I won't even attempt to explain. Well, during one of my changes, I quickly reverted back to being human, and went for a run in a spring dewy meadow. It was soooo invigorating! Well, a buff young piece of boink meat named Timmy showed me to a farm he worked on insisted that he walk me there on piggyback...at least that's what he said it was.
Well, when we arrived, he took off his shirt, wiped the sweat off his brow with it while leaving his abs to glisten in the sun like a pack of stale, glazed hot dog buns. You could almost hear the drips of sweat sizzle as they fell from his hair upon his dazzling pecs. That's when I saw it and knew I was in love: its tough, yet elegant body, the unbridled freedom and pleasure I'd finally be able to feel if I were to ride one...yes, those horses of his were quite breathtaking. And I wondered, "Has this what I've been searching for? Is this why I always kind of wished I was that boy in Equis? Will surgically attaching a horn to my head fashioned from screws and cow bone really grant me magical powers? (nope)"
And here I stand before you, on four legs, proud as can be, in my gloriously toned and pink-with-little-bits-of-glitter-that-I-got-at-Pottery-Barn-because-it-was-40%-off-so-how-could-I-resist body.
As may know by now, my true form is an entity of pure energy, but the problem is, I cannot determine what I transform into, it just sorta happens for reasons so painfully complicated that I won't even attempt to explain. Well, during one of my changes, I quickly reverted back to being human, and went for a run in a spring dewy meadow. It was soooo invigorating! Well, a buff young piece of boink meat named Timmy showed me to a farm he worked on insisted that he walk me there on piggyback...at least that's what he said it was.
Well, when we arrived, he took off his shirt, wiped the sweat off his brow with it while leaving his abs to glisten in the sun like a pack of stale, glazed hot dog buns. You could almost hear the drips of sweat sizzle as they fell from his hair upon his dazzling pecs. That's when I saw it and knew I was in love: its tough, yet elegant body, the unbridled freedom and pleasure I'd finally be able to feel if I were to ride one...yes, those horses of his were quite breathtaking. And I wondered, "Has this what I've been searching for? Is this why I always kind of wished I was that boy in Equis? Will surgically attaching a horn to my head fashioned from screws and cow bone really grant me magical powers? (nope)"
And here I stand before you, on four legs, proud as can be, in my gloriously toned and pink-with-little-bits-of-glitter-that-I-got-at-Pottery-Barn-because-it-was-40%-off-so-how-could-I-resist body.