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View Full Version : Laffy Taffy jokes make me lose faith in humanity



leader of mortals
12-28-2009, 03:26 AM
I'm eating some Laffy Taffy's that I got for christmas, and I was reading the jokes... Here they are, they are so horrible that you can't even laugh at how bad they are.

When was the meat so High?
when the cow jumped over the moon

What happened to the wind?
It blew away

Why didn't the lobster share?
Because he was shellfish

Why couldn't the skeeleton add 1+1
Because he didn't have a brain (I hope this was supposed to be an anti-joke)

What can you throw but can't catch?
A party

What did one triangle say to the other?
Lets get together and square dance

How do billboards talk?
Sign Language! (This is one that, after reading the others, is like god)

What kind of chain is edible?
A foood chain

What is in the middle of Paris?
The letter "R" (Another I didn't hate, I was expecting something much worse)

What is the funniest bone in your body?
The humerus (smurf, I knew it:mad2:)

Why is the baker so mean?
Because he beats his bread (:confused:)

What is a fish's favorite country?
Finland

How do you fix a monkey?
With a Monkey Wrench! (GAH!)

What does a ship say when it's cold?
Shiver me Timbers! (ARGGGGGGGG)

Where does Scrooge go to in New York City?
The Grumpire State Building! (I am very sorry you had to read that)

What did the cake say to the candle?
You're burning my back (Another bad anti-joke)

What did Delaware?
She wore a brand New Jersey! (I lost brain cells)

What do pigs give on thanksgiving?
Valenswines (can't do math now)

What is a room no one can enter?
A mushroom (/wrist)

Where do astronauts leave their spacecraft? (Last one, please be good!)
At parking meteors (You are scum)

Edit: Lol, forgot a topic...

Topic: What are some of the worst jokes you have ever heard? And I mean actually horrible, not "So bad it's good"

Laddy
12-28-2009, 03:31 AM
A millionaire and Italian go skydiving. The Millionaire's parachute dosen't open so the Italian guy grabs a hold of him lets his parachute loose. The millionaire says, "Thanks for saving me, sir! I will give you ten thousand dollars!" The Italian guy says, "Mamma Mia!" and lets go of the millionaire.

-.-

Marshall Banana
12-28-2009, 03:32 AM
They made me laugh. http://i107.photobucket.com/albums/m285/fofonda/pixel/usagi/p-usapati.gif

Christmas
12-28-2009, 03:43 AM
I dun like jokes. I am a serious person. http://www.clker.com/cliparts/e/d/1/e/1194986474801021798smiley120.svg.med.png

Moon Rabbits
12-28-2009, 03:49 AM
laffy taffy is the best thing ever and you are wrong.

Lawr
12-28-2009, 04:04 AM
I dunno corny jokes make me laugh the hardest. :(

Psychotic
12-28-2009, 04:48 AM
Personally, hearing about newborn babies being raped in Africa because a few AIDS sufferers have been led to believe it will cure them makes me lose faith in humanity, but hey, different strokes for different folks I guess!

Vermachtnis
12-28-2009, 06:17 AM
They made me laugh. http://i107.photobucket.com/albums/m285/fofonda/pixel/usagi/p-usapati.gif

Pant Leg Eater from the Bad World
12-28-2009, 06:55 AM
:D I just had a Laffy Taffy. They jokes were terrible too!

When does it rain money?
When there is a change in weather!

and

Which are the stronger days of the week?
Saturday and Sunday. - The rest are weekdays!

guffman
12-28-2009, 06:57 AM
DUDE! how much candy did you eat to get all these jokes? they are REALLY bad btdub.

Shlup
12-28-2009, 09:04 AM
Dammit, Psy, the only thing keeping me alive was blocking that from my learning.

Melissaur
12-28-2009, 09:01 PM
Personally, hearing about newborn babies being raped in Africa because a few AIDS sufferers have been led to believe it will cure them makes me lose faith in humanity, but hey, different strokes for different folks I guess!

You depress me!:cry:

Psychotic
12-28-2009, 09:17 PM
You guys should just read the Laffy Taffy jokes to cheer yourselves up!

rubah
12-28-2009, 09:38 PM
I have a better version of that Baker joke:

Why couldn't the Baker go on the Atkins diet?
Because he kneads his bread!

Marshall Banana
12-28-2009, 09:46 PM
http://i107.photobucket.com/albums/m285/fofonda/pixel/usagi/p-usapati.gif

Raistlin
12-29-2009, 12:01 AM
Terrible puns are the highest form of humor. If your joke doesn't make your audience groan in pain, it could have been better.

Q: How did Darth Vader know what Luke Skywalker was getting for Christmas?
He felt his presents.

I Took the Red Pill
12-29-2009, 12:05 AM
The Laffy Taffy jokes are always good for a nice "heh :smug:". They're submitted by like 8-year-olds dude, cut 'em a break.

Rad Bromance
12-29-2009, 12:59 AM
\What did Delaware?
She wore a brand New Jersey!
I actually laughed out loud at this. :greenie:

Shlup
12-29-2009, 01:01 AM
I love puns! :plumcheer:

Marshall Banana
12-29-2009, 01:05 AM
Q: How did Darth Vader know what Luke Skywalker was getting for Christmas?
He felt his presents.
http://i107.photobucket.com/albums/m285/fofonda/pixel/usagi/p-usapati.gif

Rye
12-29-2009, 01:07 AM
Cheesy jokes and puns are my favorite!

guffman
12-30-2009, 12:11 AM
I have a better version of that Baker joke:

Why couldn't the Baker go on the Atkins diet?
Because he kneads his bread!

http://images.encyclopediadramatica.com/images/3/33/Futurama_Fry_Looking_Squint.jpg

Rye
12-30-2009, 01:25 AM
Did you hear about the deaf fish?

He had to buy a herring-aid! :smug:

Melissaur
12-30-2009, 03:33 AM
LOL ROFL xD! That made me smile on the inside! ^__^

G13
12-30-2009, 05:45 AM
Did you hear about the deaf fish?

He had to buy a herring-aid! :smug:

haha I like the :smug: at the end.