Bad Dates

[Yar]

So I'm skyping Shiny talking about a titty date I had this summer. Too long for me to type here, but the abridged version is that he wanted to take me to a buffet for dinner, then proceded to check out other guys all night and flirted with one of the waiters working there that he stood up on a date one night.

Basically it was all a horrible mess. Anyway, tell me some funny lousy date stories.

[sad.mind]

She didn't show up.

[Yar]

aw. that just plain sucks, dude. :(

[Jiro]

I had a "date" the other day and it was crashed by three other people so that was kind of shit. Of course it wasn't a real date and it wasn't anywhere fancy and I made new friends but still, when I'm trying to chat up a lovely lady whose boyfriend knows how to kill me in about three trillion different ways, I want to be able to concentrate :monster:

[Shiny]

The worse was when I some how managed to be on a date with four guys at once. I'm going to leave names out since these people are all on my FB. This is what happened: I intended it to be just me and this one guy (the guy I'm dating now) but then some how a guy I went to classes with had a crush on me which was unbeknownst to me at the time.

Turns out he set it all up so that he could be with me alone in the jacuzzi, but then when I showed up I had another dude on my arm. So he proceeded to get very wasted. He couldn't even speak English. It was just "fgasgf" but he managed muster up some decency to ask me if he could tag along with us to the cuzzi, so I was like "Um it's your apartment I can't tell you no." He brought his drunk ass with us and threw up in the pool so no one could use it. He eventually took his drunk ass upstairs to his apartment and passed out.

But THEN his two friends he invited to the party decided to come with. One of them set off the alarm and the Russian mob (don't ask...they own the building) was like "You're not allowed to be in here!" So we African sprinted out and went back to the apartment. After a few hours (it was like 4am) we decided to try to go back to the pool. Well I did because I don't give a smurf. The rest of them followed.

I was thinking it was just going to me and prospective date in the jacuzzi for it to be a ROMANTIC time, but no. Two other random drunk dudes jumped in the jacuzzi and proceeded to tell ghost stories of all things and for some reason had to be really close to my face to do it. And one of them was like, "UM WHY R U TOUCHING ME WHO IS TOUCHING ME?!" I was like "That's my leg, and you're like two inches away from me right now what do you expect?" The ghost stories all ended the same exact way anyway, with him laughing and saying I looked like the little girl from The Ring. -_-

Every story he told he got closer and closer and I began to feel uncomfortable so we eventually got out and two more random people showed up. We got in again cuz we were cold. The lights were all turned off at this point to avoid being caught by the "Russian Mob" again. I could swear that girl was giving the dude head as we were in the jacuzzi, so I got paranoid and left the spa area entirely. We only really got a few minutes of hot body water time and even less of swim pool time. So yeah. :/

Oh I forgot the most awkward part is when I had my first kiss with said date, the guy who got drunk was there staring the entire time I was just like um. Yeah...that's all I can remember at the moment.

Btw, wtf is this ---> :kakapo:?!

[Parker]

I was eating and some food fell out of my mouth onto the plate and there was an awkward silence. didnt get a second date

[Martyr]

I ended up dating this incredibly awkward girl for reasons that I never understood. Pity? Curiosity? Rejection by somebody I wanted to date?
Anyway, we went to have a light dinner, but she didn't want to eat anything (but I did. I didn't eat before because I was going to eat with her, and I was hungry. Bad etiquette? On who's part? I don't know.).
Then she just kinda wanted to walk around and not talk, so I indulged her, but we were hanging around a strip mall. So I said, "look, we better do something."
But before I could take her anywhere, she had to go back home, drop off her car (we initially took separate cars) and speak to her mom about whether she trusts me to take her somewhere in my truck. So her mom and her started yapping in German, and I got the impression that they were both excited about me being spontaneous or something. I don't know. But it took so long! And I had to kind of awkwardly stand around and watch some German game show out of the corner of my eye.
I mean, I got nothing against Germans. They lopped off a heavy branch of my family tree some 70 years ago, but I can forgive that. It's just strange, you know? I can speak a little Spanish, a little Chinese. I can even pretend to pull off Swedish. German felt strange.
So, it was moderately late on a Tuesday night - it was my fault for taking her out on a Tuesday night I suppose. So, I had seen some random carnival on the drive, and I tried to take her there, but it was closing. Then I drove her over to the movie theater, but there was nothing really to watch there, and she was disinterested. Then I had the brilliant idea to rush her over to the Western Dance club (we were both wearing jeans. It was cool), but the place wasn't open on Tuesday nights.

I was lost. I was also about an hour away from where I live, so I couldn't really take her down to my usual spots. So I walked her around another strip mall, talked her up, found a quiet place, and then I tried to kiss her. Nothing kills time on a date like making out, but she kinda pushed me off. She wasn't ready for it. We shared this awkward embrace, through which I could tell that the languishing little creature was simply tormented by fears of love, romance, relationships and maybe (and maybe rightfully) me.

It was a bad idea because she really enjoyed the crappy night and wanted to do something together again.
I didn't. Even though nit wasn't really her fault that the date sucked.

But now I wonder if I'm a jerk for taking her out in the first place.

[Pike]

I was eating and some food fell out of my mouth onto the plate and there was an awkward silence. didnt get a second date

That happened to me once, but with an ice cube.

the guy thought it was cute

[fire_of_avalon]

I don't really date because it seems like a waste of time, i'm not good at structured social situations and I'm a bush hag. So generally when I go out in a date it's with a friend I have no romantic interest in or it's a set-up.

The last set-up I had was a group dinner thing and a friend was introducing me to another friend of hers. He was really great and for the first 20time or so minutes it was awesome.

Then his new girlfriend showed up. My friend had no idea he'd started seeing someone. So that was great!

[Jiro]

ouch :(

[Christmas]

I was eating and some food fell out of my mouth onto the plate and there was an awkward silence. didnt get a second date

That happened to me once, but with an ice cube.

the guy thought it was cute


When the guy likes you, anything you do is cute and awesome. Even if you fart, it will be fragrance to his nose!:bigsmile:

And when he no longer likes you, your every existence before him is a sore to his eyes! :(

I remember I went on a date with this guy who took me to a rather posh restaurant for a meal. In the middle of the meal, he started telling me his "expectations" of me. lol.

1) I look too young for my age, when we go out together, it will look like taking an underage girl out. He wants me to tie my hair into a bun and wear some clothings that make me look more "elderly". Except on occasions when he needs me to look gorgerous and pretty. Like attending functions and other craps with him. LOL.

2) He dun like me alway smiling and being friendly to everyone especially guys. He wants me to stop doing that as it make look like an idiot and silly. (I LIKE BEING AN IDIOT! LOL!!)

3) He wants me to be able to cook dinner for him and expect the dinner to be put in front of him when he reaches home after we are married. (Married? WTF? lol)

4) He will alway be my priority and no matter what happens, I should alway be there for him when he needs me. As such, a call for him and I am suppose to appear infront of him.

5) I must alway listen to him because his words and whatever he do, they are for my own good. I should not question nor doubt him.

I stared at him and there was a moment of awkward silence. I took the glass of wine, drank everything in one gulp and replied

"Cool! Why not we go to the law firm, get the lawyer dude to make a contract for us and sign it infront of him~~~?"

He actually take that into serious consideration!

Well, as for the rest of the date, I am too lazy to post it. I dun think people will be interested. :bigsmile:

[Jessweeee♪]

Horrible Online Dating Stories To Keep You Single (http://jezebel.com/5696882/horrible-online-dating-stories-to-keep-you-single)

[NorthernChaosGod]

Since someone posted the girl not showing up, I guess I can count this as a bad "date".

I had a date to go out with a girl to have some drinks and I was going to show her how to play pool. The day before our date she decides to get back with her ex. :|

[Old Manus]

>Take <s>prospective sexual conquest</s> girl out
>Things going great, visit a few bars
>End up in quiet corner of crowded bar
>She's getting tipsy
>Target acquired
>Start discussing non-work/college activities
>"Yeah I'm going for president of the [university] Christian Union this year"
>http://myfacewhen.com/images/192.jpg
>Excuse to go to relieve myself
>Exit
>"Are you sure you want to delete this contact from your phonebook?"
>It was good while it lasted

[Rebellious Eagle]

We got together and had sex in the woods. Then he had to leave early because his mom just came home from a trip. Then I went to Starbucks and got a drink and while I was sipping my tea the said guy broke up with me through text. Then I threw up everywhere. Yep. Best date ever.

[Shlup]

For our fifth wedding anniversary, BJ got home from work late, we couldn't find the one restaurant we could agree on, and by the time we gave up pretty much everything was closing. We drove through Del Taco and ate it in front of the TV.

It was still enjoyable though.

RE wins, btw.

[Del Murder]

We waited in line for about two hours to watch Pearl Harbor on opening night. Then the movie sucked and along the way I realized I don't actually like this chick.

My worst date with Miriel was probably when we went to Catalina and I got mono. But it was still fun until the mono took over.

[Loony BoB]

For some reason I can't think of any. It helps that I've barely had any dates. Although I have gone on holiday at my very-recent ex-girlfriend's place (I had paid for the holiday already, I stupidly still was desperate to get her back, it seemed like a good idea in my horrible state of mind). To be fair, it was still... okay at times. We were still capable of having good times. But that made it worse somehow, because that would convince me it was going to work out, and then it got terribly worst very fast, and, well, yeah. Sex was good, though. =| Heh. If anything, I learned a large amount about myself and how I needed to change from that experience.

[Pumpkin]

The guy yelled at me and stormed out because I didn't finish my ice cream.

I would have paid for it if it was that big of a friggin deal.

[Rebellious Eagle]

The guy yelled at me and stormed out because I didn't finish my ice cream.

I would have paid for it if it was that big of a friggin deal.

Well, at least it saved you the trouble of going on more dates just too find out he's that much of a penny pincher :x

[Yar]

We got together and had sex in the woods. Then he had to leave early because his mom just came home from a trip. Then I went to Starbucks and got a drink and while I was sipping my tea the said guy broke up with me through text. Then I threw up everywhere. Yep. Best date ever.I'm not really sure that counts as a date.

[NorthernChaosGod]

We got together and had sex in the woods. Then he had to leave early because his mom just came home from a trip. Then I went to Starbucks and got a drink and while I was sipping my tea the said guy broke up with me through text. Then I threw up everywhere. Yep. Best date ever.
Such a classy gentlemen.

[Shiny]

@Christmas - psycho bastard dates are the worse. I hope you told him where he could stick that contract.

[Madame Adequate]

Jess and I went out once, I believe it was on Hallowe'en, and I had forgotten that Reading are literal, actual Nazis about checking your ID. We tried about four different places before almost giving up, she was mad and I felt like a twat for forgetting my passport (Don't drive so :monster:), then we decided to try one last place and they were totally bro tier, had great drinks, and it was just a classy place with no spenks from uni dressed up like Harry wanking Potter.

So uh I guess that didn't turn out so bad in the end :shobon:

[NorthernChaosGod]

You don't have an ID? :Oo:

[Freya]

I now know that taking men to the woods to do dirty things is a date. Noted.

[Jiro]

You can't exactly do clean things in the woods. I mean, it's the woods! Everything is either tree or dirt or shit!

[Loony BoB]

What does define a date, anyway?

[Christmas]

What does define a date, anyway?

Thought if some bloke/lass/thing ask me out is consider a date! :bigsmile:

The location isn't all that important I guess! :bigsmile:

How will you define a date, Mr BoB? :bigsmile:

[Martyr]

I don't know if I should warp the thread like this or if the question was a joke, but this is my take.

A date is when two people make a specific plan for a specific day (date) during which they will attempt to push their relationship forward in a romantic direction.
A bad date is when, mid-date, either one or both parties come to the conclusion that the relationship will never become romatic, that the romance was a bad idea, or that the date caused the relationship to weaken instead of strengthen.

But because a date is about strengthening, maintaining or beginning a romantic relationship, anything can be a date, whether it's a night out with a group of friends or a spontaneous meeting at Taco bell. Whatever brings a couple closer together.

[Pike]

What does define a date, anyway?

Good question!

Especially seeing as most of my dates involve multiplayer Civilization IV

[Rebellious Eagle]

It was a date to me. We met up beforehand at the mall :x

[Darkswordofchaos]

This v

Okay, I met this guy, we'll say Rick. Anyways I was 15 and he looked about 5 years older....which is what he told me. I didn't think it was gonna go past a date so when he asked me to dinner I accepted. The date was great, we went to see a scary movie which made me end up sitting in his lap with his arms wrapped around me. The date ended with a nice long kiss. We talked to eachother on the phone for hours each day. We saw eachother throughout the summer and got close but kept it to small dates. I had to go register for school and I saw him there. So I ran up to hug and kiss him and he wouldnt touch me. I shruged it off and got my stuff. I went home and called him and he said we couldn't see eachother anymore... I was crushed. First day of school came around...and I saw him... Turns out he's NOT only 5 years older...turns out hes about 15 years older and also my Geography teacher! It was SO embarassing! Everyone knew! It's the worst class of my life! ~Anonymous

[demondude]

It was you, wasn't it.

[Shiny]

I don't know if I should warp the thread like this or if the question was a joke, but this is my take.

A date is when two people make a specific plan for a specific day (date) during which they will attempt to push their relationship forward in a romantic direction.
A bad date is when, mid-date, either one or both parties come to the conclusion that the relationship will never become romatic, that the romance was a bad idea, or that the date caused the relationship to weaken instead of strengthen.

But because a date is about strengthening, maintaining or beginning a romantic relationship, anything can be a date, whether it's a night out with a group of friends or a spontaneous meeting at Taco bell. Whatever brings a couple closer together.
Well I guess everyone has their own ideas about what dating is and I disagree with yours partly. I've been on dates where they were good, but I didn't consider them romantic or didn't have an interest in pushing it romantically. The idea was to get to know each other better while we decided where to go from there. For that reason I hardly call going out with your significant other dates because you already know the trivial things about them that people generally ask when they first start dating and you are already romantically inclined. Dating to me, has always been like a get-to-know-you.

[Jiro]

Phew, then I should be safe.

[Martyr]

Well I guess everyone has their own ideas about what dating is and I disagree with yours partly. I've been on dates where they were good, but I didn't consider them romantic or didn't have an interest in pushing it romantically. The idea was to get to know each other better while we decided where to go from there. For that reason I hardly call going out with your significant other dates because you already know the trivial things about them that people generally ask when they first start dating and you are already romantically inclined. Dating to me, has always been like a get-to-know-you.

Haven't you ever had to fight off saying that stupid line, "So... is this a date?"
Or have you ever had to answer when somebody says, "So... is this a date?"
The "date," in my experience, is more than "getting to know one another" because it is the critical turning point toward "getting to know each other intimately."
Thus, "dating" is always either countered or preceeded by "hanging out."

I can hang out and get to know somebody, be it a guy or a girl. But once it's a "date," then both of us know that, at one point or another, we're going to have to decide whether our lips are seriously going to touch.

Of course, you may have completely different experiences or even social dialects. But where I come from, we don't date unless we're resigning ourselves to the potential of love, marriage, babies in baby carriages.

I'm also a big supporter of the When Harry Met Sally philosophy, that the potential for sex always spoils any semblance of real platonic relationship, and ultimately, no man ever "hangs out" with a woman without that there's a possibilty that someday she will help carry his genes on into the next generation. So most of the time when I "hang out" with a girl, both of us know that it's a set up for a date. And when we date, it's a set up for romance. And when we romance, it's a set up for broken promises and cheated hearts.

[Jiro]

No chance of it being a set up for some casual sex on the side? :(

[Martyr]

That's called a fling.

[Christmas]

No chance of it being a set up for some casual sex on the side? :(

Causal sex? This reminds me of the two stray dogs that I saw on the street. One was banging the others! Doubt they know each other before the banging commence!! Something like that!? :bigsmile:

[Jiro]

To actually respond to your previous post with some seriousness instead of stupidity this time, I don't think it's impossible to "hang out" with a girl. For instance, I've made a new friend through work and she is a lovely and very beautiful girl. Last Thursday we caught up after class and had a coffee and some cookies and it was a jolly good time. I am not out to seduce her or anything, though if she propositioned me then I probably wouldn't object*. There is no romantic notion between us.

As an addition, in my own mind I deem that a date. My definition of a date is actually pretty much exactly the same thing as hanging out, whether or not it's romantically inclined. The problem with my working definition is that people will call queer^ if I go on a "date" will a male buddy :greenie: But in my mind, nothing separates the two, and "Romantic" is a little variable box that is either checked or not.

*If you ignored the fact that both of us are in relationships already, and both of us like our relationships, and if you also ignored the fact that her boyfriend probably knows more types of martial arts than I do countries, then I'd be all over that.

^Not that there is anything wrong with that, I just don't want to broadcast wrong and disappoint anyone. Oh listen to my arrogance, this isn't making me look better at all.

EDIT: All of the above is in response to Martyr.

@Christmas: uhhh yeah, something like that :shifty:

[Christmas]

To actually respond to your previous post with some seriousness instead of stupidity this time, I don't think it's impossible to "hang out" with a girl. For instance, I've made a new friend through work and she is a lovely and very beautiful girl. Last Thursday we caught up after class and had a coffee and some cookies and it was a jolly good time. I am not out to seduce her or anything, though if she propositioned me then I probably wouldn't object*. There is no romantic notion between us.

Ya! I have friends who are guys which we hang out together! I think it is possible for such things!! But it all depends on the guy personal preference whether to see all girls as potential relationship partner cum banging objects or friends which you can hang out with and talk to! :bigsmile:


@Christmas: uhhh yeah, something like that :shifty:

ARE YOU WRIGGLING TO THE STREETS NOW ARMED WITH YOUR STICKS CUM BALLS, GRAB ANY STRAY WOMEN WALKING PAST AND COMMENCE THE BANGING!?

[Jiro]

You make me sound like some kind of predator! I'll have you all know I am a gentleman. Not a scholar, but just a gentleman.

Dinner first.

[Martyr]

I wouldn't mind having a girl as a "friend," but I've never pulled it off.
All my female friends have either been forced platonic because I only see them at work, they have boyfriends or else I only pretend to like them. Everybody else turned romantic somewhere down the line, sometimes even if they are work relationships or if they had boyfriends.
The only thing that separates a girl friend from a girlfriend is circumstance. Either she's already with somebody else or else I don't like her that much. If I don't like her that much, she can be my friend, but I'm not going to go out alone or frequently with a girl I'm not really interested in.

I wonder what life would be like if I were bi?
I'd probably have a hard time with everybody.
So maybe it's me.

Anyway, one time, this girl came up to me and was all flirty and said, "I just turned 18! Let's hang out."
I was an amateur back then, so I was like, "Yeah. Let's."
But I was agreeing to hang out. She was agreeing to have sex with a 20-something year old - for lyke the first time evar!
I won't divulge anymore of the bad/awkward (it wasn't really bad until certain stuff happened) date, now that I've thought about it, suffice it to say that neither of got what we wanted or expected.

Bottom line is: Maybe I'm wrong. Date probably means all sorts of things to different people, but when it comes to the opposite sex, we gotta think on our feet and make snap decisions on meanings behind words. People protect their hearts with a fortress of deceptions.

[NorthernChaosGod]

To actually respond to your previous post with some seriousness instead of stupidity this time, I don't think it's impossible to "hang out" with a girl. For instance, I've made a new friend through work and she is a lovely and very beautiful girl. Last Thursday we caught up after class and had a coffee and some cookies and it was a jolly good time. I am not out to seduce her or anything, though if she propositioned me then I probably wouldn't object*. There is no romantic notion between us.

As an addition, in my own mind I deem that a date. My definition of a date is actually pretty much exactly the same thing as hanging out, whether or not it's romantically inclined. The problem with my working definition is that people will call queer^ if I go on a "date" will a male buddy :greenie: But in my mind, nothing separates the two, and "Romantic" is a little variable box that is either checked or not.

*If you ignored the fact that both of us are in relationships already, and both of us like our relationships, and if you also ignored the fact that her boyfriend probably knows more types of martial arts than I do countries, then I'd be all over that.

^Not that there is anything wrong with that, I just don't want to broadcast wrong and disappoint anyone. Oh listen to my arrogance, this isn't making me look better at all.

EDIT: All of the above is in response to Martyr.

@Christmas: uhhh yeah, something like that :shifty:

Will you go out on a date with me? :bigsmile:

[Araciel]

two words:

sock puppets

[Mercen-X]

All rainbows, sparkles, sunshine, and moonlight... awww...

I don't know... my worst memories associated with being on a date would be mostly in college...
I had my first glass of whiskey (with lemon) at a Red Lobster and thought that I'd immediately gotten drunk and nauseous... turns out it was just a bad combination of the alcohol with the fact that I hadn't eaten anything but a huge bag of popcorn at an early movie.

I hung out with a girl in the mall and she brought me out to her car filling my head with mixed signals. She drew pictures on my arm and then kicked me out of the car.

While dating a proponent for the Book Club, I visited her at her house and had my first allergic reaction to cats... or at least that's what I thought at the time. I've never had a reaction since. To this day, I still don't know why my eyes and nose were affected the way they were, but it totally screwed up what seemed like a promising afternoon.

Oh! Wait! Back in high school, I offered to take a couple of juniors to a senior dance at a bowling alley. Too many kids from other schools heard about it and tried to pass themselves off as local students so in the rush to get in, the girls I brought made it inside and I get left in the cold. I'm a nice enough guy, but I wasn't about to let those girls party their butts off and not give me a second thought, so I had the bowling staff fetch their asses out of there. The only upside to the night was that when a group of pricks drove by us on the street (waiting for my parents to pick us up) shouting lewd comments at the girls, I told them I'd like to find them and beat them senseless and I got a surprisingly positive reaction from the girls. I mean, it wasn't anything special. Just one of the girls said that I was sweet. It didn't occur to me then what she meant, but later I realized she probably thought I was too weak to have actually done anything. But that's all speculation.