pocahontas; ruining your childhood

[Hollycat]

Get ready to have Pocahontas ruined for you:

1. Pocahontas was only twelve when john smith left
2. Pocahontas married a John Rolfe
3. Pocahontas did not save Smith, smith wasnt being executed, he was being adopted, the ceremony involved literally beating the european out of him and she was the simbolic welcoming to his new home.
4. Pocahontas's name was not Pocahontas. Pocahontas was a nickname that meant, to put it real gently: one with many male friends

[Pike]

It's okay; I knew most of this long before the movie came out

*is old*

[Fynn]

Had it served to me during my American History lectures. I don't get what's so special about it. I still love the movie. Especially the music. Ah... The music...

For the record, John Rolfe appeared in the sequel (which was otherwise sucky).

[Freya]

I have never had, even as a child, preconceived notions that disney = fact. I understood that it was for entertainment value. And damn good entertainment value. SO HAVEN'T RUINED ANYTHING. I win :colbert:

[Hollycat]

I have never had, even as a child, preconceived notions that disney = fact. I understood that it was for entertainment value. And damn good entertainment value. SO HAVEN'T RUINED ANYTHING. I win :colbert:

dumbledore dies on page 673

[Kokichi]

spoilers she dies only a year after marrying into royalty

Oh wait, how do I tag.

[blackmage_nuke]

Mowgli wears Shere Khan like a coat and everyone dies in hunchback of Notre dame as well

Also none of them spoke english

[Freya]

I have never had, even as a child, preconceived notions that disney = fact. I understood that it was for entertainment value. And damn good entertainment value. SO HAVEN'T RUINED ANYTHING. I win :colbert:

dumbledore dies on page 673
You're adopted :colbert:

[Shlup]

Also, she wasn't really blue.

[Hollycat]

I have never had, even as a child, preconceived notions that disney = fact. I understood that it was for entertainment value. And damn good entertainment value. SO HAVEN'T RUINED ANYTHING. I win :colbert:

dumbledore dies on page 673

I am your father
You're adopted :colbert:

[rubah]

Also, she wasn't really blue.
what?


anyways, HC, you're at least a decade late on the ruining my childhood wrt Pocahontas. Next you'll try to tell me that the dog fur trade is alive and well in China and other underdeveloped nations, and that in the first world, many Dalmatian puppies went neglected because children wanted to have a spotty dog like in the cartoon, but were unwilling to care for them, not to mention all the genetic defects in the breed that went unmentioned in the movie.

[Hollycat]

be honest, how many of you knew pocahontas was translated as little whore

[Peegee]

what about mulan? she was 18 instead of a child or w/e disney portrayed
or snow white and the seven thieves?
or lion king / kimba the white lion
or mickey mouse?

:) a lot of disney is adaptation.

[DMKA]

Also, The Little Mermaid throws herself into the sea while still in human form, disintegrates and dies, and has to remain in limbo for 200 years before she's allowed into heaven.

[Pike]

Don't forget Atlantis the Lost Empire and Nadia Nadia vs. Atlantis? - Anime News Network (http://www.animenewsnetwork.com/feature/2001-05-15/2)

Although in fairness I don't care what anyone says, Atlantis is one of my favorite movies EVER

[Jiro]

Anastasia is probably the most ficticious portrayal of anything historical by Disney.

Honestly though, I don't associate anything Disney does with the historical events or personages. It's just fiction. Awesome fiction.

[TrollHunter]

Also, The Little Mermaid throws herself into the sea while still in human form, disintegrates and dies, and has to remain in limbo for 200 years before she's allowed into heaven.

Read it in creative writing, it was... it caught me by surprise.

[qwertysaur]

Hercules goes berserk and kills Megera.
Aurora gets raped by Prince Phillip.

Disney makes some changes to the stories they adapt to films. :p

[Pike]

Anastasia is probably the most ficticious portrayal of anything historical by Disney.

Honestly though, I don't associate anything Disney does with the historical events or personages. It's just fiction. Awesome fiction.

Man, I hate to be that guy, but Anastasia isn't Disney.

Still, I get your point! And yeah, another awesome movie.

[Hollycat]

I love anastasia

[NorthernChaosGod]

The only way to ruin childhoods is to show some rule 34.

(Don't show rule 34)

[Mirage]

You think I'm an ignorant savage
And you've been so many places
I guess it must be so
But still I cannot see
If the savage one is me
How can there be so much that you don't know?
You don't know ...

You think you own whatever land you land on
The Earth is just a dead thing you can claim
But I know every rock and tree and creature
Has a life, has a spirit, has a name

You think the only people who are people
Are the people who look and think like you
But if you walk the footsteps of a stranger
You'll learn things you never knew you never knew

Have you ever heard the wolf cry to the blue corn moon
Or asked the grinning bobcat why he grinned?
Can you sing with all the voices of the mountains?
Can you paint with all the colors of the wind?
Can you paint with all the colors of the wind?

Come run the hidden pine trails of the forest
Come taste the sunsweet berries of the Earth
Come roll in all the riches all around you
And for once, never wonder what they're worth

The rainstorm and the river are my brothers
The heron and the otter are my friends
And we are all connected to each other
In a circle, in a hoop that never ends

How high will the sycamore grow?
If you cut it down, then you'll never know
And you'll never hear the wolf cry to the blue corn moon

For whether we are white or copper skinned
We need to sing with all the voices of the mountains
We need to paint with all the colors of the wind

You can own the Earth and still
All you'll own is Earth until
You can paint with all the colors of the wind

[MJN SEIFER]

what about mulan? she was 18 instead of a child or w/e disney portrayed
or lion king / kimba the white lion
.
Mulan was 18 the Disney version, and Kimba/Lion King is an outdated false rumor.

[Kossage]

I hold Pocahontas in high esteem. It's a wonderful movie with a fascinating story, awesome animation (just look at what Glen Keane did with Pocahontas! ^_^), great characterization, nice voice work and awesome music (Menken rocks my socks, and Schwartz's lyrics are awesome). Sure, it has some flaws, and the theatrical release sadly cut out the heartwarming "If I Never Knew You" (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KiuBw_kj1-U) (I think the movie is crippled without that song because it's so pivotal to Pocahontas's and Smith's character arcs), but thankfully that song and its bittersweet reprise were added to the film later on. I just hope that once it's released on Blu-ray in a fancy edition (hopefully... *knocks on wood*), the Finnish dub will finally include the scene because I really want to hear a Finnish version of that lovely song. :D

The sequel is a mixed bag. On the one hand I enjoyed some parts of it (Pocahontas's struggle between her love for Smith and Rolfe, the "fish out of water" scenario when she goes to London, Ratcliffe's greater villainous role and his domination through most of the movie) but on the other hand some parts had lackluster animation, and some questionable story choices. However, it did give us the lovely "Where Do I Go from Here" (http://youtu.be/UfTieVPjN7E) song, so it's not a total loss. In general even Disney's worst animated DTV sequels had at least interesting songs, and Pocahontas II is no exception to that rule. :)

[rubah]

and Kimba/Lion King is an outdated false rumor.
is it?

[Hollycat]

shitake mushrooms make me think of the mulan movie for some reason, that movie was ruined for me when I was told that mulan was actually abused after they found out she was a woman. Up till that point in the movie, I love that movie

[MJN SEIFER]

and Kimba/Lion King is an outdated false rumor.
is it? Yeah, if you ACTUALLY sit and compare the two they're nothing like each other save from stock images, and the fact they're lions.

[rubah]

Stock images?

[TrollHunter]

The only way to ruin childhoods is to show some rule 34.

(Don't show rule 34)

Oh no... not rule 34.
Nothing is safe.

[MJN SEIFER]

Stock images?Images which could have been in any movie, like a random animal (in this case a lion) standing on a cliff.

[DMKA]

Anastasia is probably the most ficticious portrayal of anything historical by Disney.

Honestly though, I don't associate anything Disney does with the historical events or personages. It's just fiction. Awesome fiction.
FYI, Anastacia was a 20th Century Fox film by Don Bluth. Disney has absolutely no connection to it.

[Shlup]

The prince raped and impregnated Sleeping Beauty, and she woke up to being a mother. The little mermaid, in addition to committing suicide, as mentioned, did so because the prince married someone else and she was supposed to murder him to keep her legs. The witch murdered Rapunzel, and the prince lept from the tower to kill himself, but survived only blinded by the thorns, and spent the rest of his days wandering and mourning his dead wife. Aladdin kidnapped the princess in the night, repeatedly, and she was terrified of him.

Disney is Disney.

[rubah]

Well, I've never seen any other movies with a herd of wild herbivores stampeding at eye-level, or an animal hanging from a cliff by one paw, or a cloud formation that looks like your dad (http://www.kimbawlion.com/rant2.htm), but *shruggles*

At least they drew new poses and archetypes, unlike a lot of their other cartoons ;D

btw, stock images usually refers to images that are used exactly in other places, not just similar poses or POVs. e.g. istockphoto.com

[Jiro]

Looks like I have a tutor to go and shout at for being misleading!

[qwertysaur]

Alice's adventure in Wonderland was a drug trip. (this one is pretty obvious though :p)

[TrollHunter]

Alice's adventure in Wonderland was a drug trip. (this one is pretty obvious though :p)


At least it was a good read.

[Pant Leg Eater from the Bad World]

PocaHOntas.


EDIT: Hey Zues. I read through this whole thread just to make sure nobody else made that joke.

[MJN SEIFER]

Alice's adventure in Wonderland was a drug trip. (this one is pretty obvious though :p)
Actually, Alice in Wonderland is a pisstake on Mathemaics. Strange, but true.

[NorthernChaosGod]

Alice's adventure in Wonderland was a drug trip. (this one is pretty obvious though :p)
Actually, Alice in Wonderland is a pisstake on Mathemaics. Strange, but true.
I heard this as well. In fact, Wikipedia seems to agree on at least some symbolism.
Alice's Adventures in Wonderland - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alice%27s_Adventures_in_Wonderland#Writing_style_and_themes)

[Martyr]

So Disney goes through all this work to take upsetting, pointlessly tragic stories and make them into wonderful, memorable tales of magic and love, and all we want to do is lambast that effort and creativity and cling to stories about sexually abused young Indian women, tortured mermaids, raped beauties and drugs and math?

I'm not a big fan of the inner workings of Disney World, but I think the movies, at least the ones I grew up with (I don't know much about the modern stuff), have a positive effect on childrens' imaginations and world view. But better than what we'd have if they were cartoon adaptations of real world horror.

And I didn't know that Pocahontas meant whore.

I find math equally or more horrifying than drugs

[Mirage]

Did it mean whore though? I thought they said it means "one with many male friends". Just sleeping around doesn't make you a prostitute.

[Martyr]

Judging by my infinitesmall understanding of history, I'd guess that they didn't respect Pocahontas, whoever she was, enough not to call her a whore.

But maybe it simply meant that she had a lot of guy friends. After all, dudes are totally chill, and girls are always sabotaging each other- or something like that. I hear this sort of argument very frequently among young women who surround themselves with men.

[Hollycat]

When I said one with many male friends, I was putting it nicely, Pocahontas literaly means little whore

[G13]

and Kimba/Lion King is an outdated false rumor.
is it? Yeah, if you ACTUALLY sit and compare the two they're nothing like each other save from stock images, and the fact they're lions.

I dunno, the story seems familiar too. (http://www.kimbawlion.com/rant2.htm)

[Mirage]

When I said one with many male friends, I was putting it nicely, Pocahontas literaly means little whore

well that clears things up

[MJN SEIFER]

and Kimba/Lion King is an outdated false rumor.
is it? Yeah, if you ACTUALLY sit and compare the two they're nothing like each other save from stock images, and the fact they're lions.

I dunno, the story seems familiar too. (http://www.kimbawlion.com/rant2.htm)

Oh, I have things to say about that article (thanks for linking to it so I don't have to look for it myself) Yeah, a lot of the things in that are wrong/exagerated. I'll make a new post for it so I don't go off topic.

But a slight preview - does this guy really think Kimba and Simba looked like each other when they were young? Does he think Kimba even looked like a lion when he was young?

[demondude]

I don't like any Disney movies.

[charliepanayi]

I don't like any Disney movies.

Nobody's perfect.

[Araciel]

It's okay; I knew most of this long before the movie came out

*is old and how*

[G13]

Aladdin kidnapped the princess in the night, repeatedly, and she was terrified of him.

I don't recall it happening that way, but it has been several years since I read it. From what I remember, he was to be married to her, after offering a ton of money for her hand, but the vizier tricked the sultan into letting his son marry her, so Aladdin used his lamp to wish her to his house each night so the marriage couldn't be consummated.

Wait... that's kind of like kidnapping. :-/






and Kimba/Lion King is an outdated false rumor.
is it? Yeah, if you ACTUALLY sit and compare the two they're nothing like each other save from stock images, and the fact they're lions.

I dunno, the story seems familiar too. (http://www.kimbawlion.com/rant2.htm)

Oh, I have things to say about that article (thanks for linking to it so I don't have to look for it myself) Yeah, a lot of the things in that are wrong/exagerated. I'll make a new post for it so I don't go off topic.

But a slight preview - does this guy really think Kimba and Simba looked like each other when they were young? Does he think Kimba even looked like a lion when he was young?

I suppose you'd know better than I, assuming you've seen Kimba, but I remain a bit skeptical of your analysis nevertheless. If I hadn't read the article, just looking at the pictures accompanying it would have sold me. The cloud Mufasa, the Pride Rock pose, hanging from a cliff as the main antagonist watches, it all seems pretty similar, man. Even the names are the same! Kimba/Simba? That's a little too coincidental. I'll try and find a copy to watch, but until it's finished I'll be expecting an older version of the Lion King.