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View Full Version : GUYS PRE-EMPTIVE STRIKE! LET'S YELL AT THE GUYS WE'RE SNEAK-ATTACKING!



ReloadPsi
10-22-2011, 11:54 AM
I didn't like this game. At all. One of the things that really stuck out for me though was after we'd fought the Guard Scorpion at the start and were picking off the many mooks dotted along the bridge. The game slipped into cutscene mode and Lightning saw a dude and his robot dog with their back to her.

So she runs at them bellowing "PRE-EMPTIVE STRIKE!" and they instantly turn and notice her. The token blaxploitation hero even lampshaded her stupidity by remarking about losing the element of surprise.

All I could think was "Great, this is our heroine." Along with a load of other things that caused me to rage through the first hour of the game, this was what really stood out as being completely stupid. It's not like I can even find it in me to defend it like FFX's laughing scene, it was just so horribly moronic.

Honourable mention: trying to get all these l'Cies back home, when odds are that if Sanctum were able to tell who was a l'Cie and who was not then they were just gonna track them back down and put them on another holocaust train.

What was the most stupid moment of the game for you?

Elpizo
10-22-2011, 12:41 PM
Chapter 1 to 12: "We're not gonna do as you say Barthandelus!"
Chapter 13: "Well smurf that, let's kill Orphan."

Jiro
10-22-2011, 01:15 PM
Probably still a good idea to spoiler tag stuff in this forum, friends. The game isn't that old and there are still active threads from members asking whether or not they should buy the game (ergo, they haven't played it yet. We don't like to ruin other people's "fun", right? Right).

That being said, agree fully with Elpizo

ReloadPsi
10-22-2011, 01:28 PM
Fair enough. I don't think anything from the first hour really classes as a spoiler though, and I could care less about having a game I don't plan to play further spoiled :P

Jiro
10-22-2011, 03:28 PM
It was mostly just names and events towards the end I'm worried about. I know I'm usually late to the table when games roll around and so I get pissed when people spoil them. But don't anybody feel like they're in trouble, yeah? WE COOL GUYS, WE COOL.

Oh and also, I disliked Hope's idea that Snow killed his mother. It's just like, dude, she fell off a goddamn broken bridge and shit, it happens. Cheer the fuck up.

And pre-battle with Barty at end game, the illusions of Dahj and Serah are shattered. Everybody is all like "aw nu bro" :ohnoes: but then Lightning comes out with a corker; "Think of where Serah really is" or something. Snow looks at a single crystal drop in his hand. Your girl ain't that little bro. Seriously that whole thing just ruined the impact of the fact "killings" a moment earlier.

ReloadPsi
10-22-2011, 05:37 PM
Oh and also, I disliked Hope's idea that Snow killed his mother. It's just like, dude, she fell off a goddamn broken bridge and tit, it happens. Cheer the smurf up.

Wow, he actually ends up believing that? It was her own damn fault! The bitch volunteered and if she wasn't genre-savvy enough to know that 99% of mothers can and will die in an FF game, too freakin' bad! The only FF mother in the entire main numbered series so far to stil be alive at the end of the game is Rosa's mother in FF4, and even then she makes no appearance in the ending.

DMKA
10-22-2011, 05:51 PM
I can't think of anything remarkably stupider in FFXIII than any other JRPG (in fact it's pretty tame) but I also though what Elpizo posted was pretty silly.

Wolf Kanno
10-22-2011, 09:22 PM
There are too many to really list without possibly doing a second playthrough (which is not happening anytime soon, if ever) but if I had to do the big one, it would be this:



Chapter 1 to 12: "We're not gonna do as you say Barthandelus!"
Chapter 13: "Well smurf that, let's kill Orphan."

I'm also going to add:
The Ending, where everyone is saved by a last minute Deus Ex Machina (the power of Lesbian LOVE FTW!!!) and somehow everyone is cured of their l'Cie status despite the game saying that doesn't happen. Granted the sequel is going to address all this, but I feel having the end resolved by a Goddess figure (making this a literal Deus ex Machina) that is only mentioned ambiguously twice in an optional datalog that you can easily miss by not bothering with the Mark Hunts, is kind of a poor way to do this. Truly XIII is the height of writing in video games...