Augment Yourself

[Pike]

If you could become a cyborg and give yourself one upgraded feature what would it be?

[fire_of_avalon]

Steel vagina.

[Sephex]

Steel vagina.

Well, ****, no one is going to top that.

[Tigmafuzz]

Steel vagina.
Well, damn.

[NorthernChaosGod]

I would get robot hands so I could play badass guitar solos and be a bitchin' musician.

[Tigmafuzz]

You don't need robot hands for that.

[Shlup]

I would like to hear one benefit of a steel vagina.

Buns of steel I can see. Though I think I'd go with robot voice. Can I have a robot voice? That would be great. I would like to be able to bust out autotune at will.

[Bunny]

He does.

Jet pack feet.

[Iceglow]

A steel vagina would get hammered all out of shape by a titanium cock still.

[NorthernChaosGod]

You don't need robot hands for that.
Haven't you seen the Futurama episode? I want that.

[Loony BoB]

Some kind of device that allows me to teleport. I'm not sure if this is doable. If we're just talking "Make a part of your body into metal!" then I'll go with a good, solid shell for my torso - so I never have to worry about getting a beer belly. :)

Seriously though, not sure. Eyes would be neat, you could come up with all kinds of features for them.

[fire_of_avalon]

I would like to hear one benefit of a steel vagina.

Buns of steel I can see. Though I think I'd go with robot voice. Can I have a robot voice? That would be great. I would like to be able to bust out autotune at will.
Cracking nuts.

[Shlup]

I would not agree that that is a benefit. And I know it's been a long time, Megan, but the nuts don't go in the vagina.

[blackmage_nuke]

An electromagnetic cock, to combat FOAbot's steel vagina. Such power is not meant to be wielded by one individual

[sharkythesharkdogg]

An electromagnetic cock, to combat FOAbot's steel vagina. Such power is not meant to be wielded by one individual

Indeed, the oft prophesied "Tesla Shlong". A formidable apparatus.

[fire_of_avalon]

I would not agree that that is a benefit. And I know it's been a long time, Megan, but the nuts don't go in the vagina.listen here, fussy britches, that was a kickass double entendre and you know it.


An electromagnetic cock, to combat FOAbot's steel vagina. Such power is not meant to be wielded by one individual ooooooo bb

[Mirage]

One feature? Pike, now you're being mean. That's like telling a limbless torso he can get back only *one* human extremity.

But of course, already being a cyborg, I don't really need all that many more features than I already have.

[Rantz]

I wanna shoot lazors from my mouth.

[Pike]

One feature? Pike, now you're being mean. That's like telling a limbless torso he can get back only *one* human extremity.

Well, one feature to start with!

I'm going straight for the hardcore stuff and upgrading my brain. Finally I'll have photographic memory just like Loony Bob!

[Mirage]

Digital brain augmentation, for advanced analyzation and storing of visual, auditory and olfactory input in ways a wetware brain isn't particularly good at.

I mean, assuming I was a normal human being, of course.

[Jiro]

Gimme like fucking awesome cybernetic legs so I can jump real high and shit.

[Sephex]

I would like to hear one benefit of a steel vagina.


Let's just assume it's a T-1000 vagina and it can morph and stuff. Yeah, that will work...

[rubah]

laser-breasts pew pew

[sharkythesharkdogg]

I would like to hear one benefit of a steel vagina.


Sex with Superman?

[Bunny]

laser-breasts pew pew

Breasts made of lasers? Breasts that shoot lasers? If we are talking about the latter, is it the entire breast or merely the nipple which shoots lasers? Do you have control of their laser ability or are they Cyclopean in nature? If we are talking about the former, what would the benefits of such a thing be? I suppose they would be lighter than normal breasts but you would lose most of the functionality in them.

[Slothy]

Frankly, I'd be happy with Adam Jenson style blade arms.

For cutting steak of course. :kakapo:

[Jessweeee♪]

I would turn my boobs into storage units. As a cyborg I do not need the baby feeding bits in there. And women's clothes do not have adequate pockets.

[Jiro]

It's socially acceptable for you to carry a handbag around though. Stop being greedy!

[Peegee]

Cyborg would mean I would be shaped the way I want.

And I STILL get an upgrade? I want brain zapping tendrils so I can give people euphoria against their will.

zap zap
*drool*
*splooge*
problem solved.

[Jessweeee♪]

It's socially acceptable for you to carry a handbag around though. Stop being greedy!

I don't want to carry a handbag. I want a wallet with tampon and cell phone space. So I can be freeeeeee.

[theundeadhero]

Super eyes that give me thermal, night, and other super-awesome vision options.

[Agent Proto]

Super eyes that give me thermal, night, and other super-awesome vision options.

You should also have the appearance of being cross-eyed like Derpy to go along with that.

[Laddy]

I'd create a cyborg friend so I'd never be lonely. :)

[NorthernChaosGod]

Super eyes that give me thermal, night, and other super-awesome vision options.
That's a good one! Add zoom capabilities and I'll take that too.

[rubah]

Start wearing a cup (http://www.lunapads.com/), Jessweeee.


Bunny, if you can't see the appeal of laser breasts, I'm afraid there is no hope for you.

[Bunny]

You didn't answer my other questions!

[Sephex]

Despite my earlier stance, I thought of one now.

I would enhance my eyes with nanomachines (or something) to see the world in unimaginable ways...but then I would probably connect them to the internet and stare off into space all day.

[Tigmafuzz]

I would give myself some sort of imagination upgrade so that anything I focus on hard enough becomes a reality. And then give myself everything in this thread. Other than a steel vagina, of course. Actually, you know what? I'll take a steel vagina too. Why the hell not.

[Quindiana Jones]

Vibrating penis. Then I could play foa like a tambourine.

[Tigmafuzz]

That would sound horrible. Unless we decorate her vagina with bells...

[Hollycat]

Oral and rectal flamethrowers, laser beam eyeballs, atomic penis, dance legs, super amazing vocal chords of beautification, and color change hair.

[Bunny]

Perhaps you should nix all those enhancements and instead get something that enables you to count to one.

[Hollycat]

That is one enhancement.
That sounds like less enhancements than a japanese toilet to me.





fine.
lets go with glowinthedark color change hair

[NorthernChaosGod]

Despite my earlier stance, I thought of one now.

I would enhance my eyes with nanomachines (or something) to see the world in unimaginable ways...but then I would probably connect them to the internet and stare off into space all day.

"I don't want to be human! I want to see gamma rays! I want to hear X-rays! And I want to - I want to smell dark matter! Do you see the absurdity of what I am? I can't even express these things properly because I have to - I have to conceptualize complex ideas in this stupid limiting spoken language! But I know I want to reach out with something other than these prehensile paws! And feel the wind of a supernova flowing over me! I'm a machine! And I can know much more! I can experience so much more. But I'm trapped in this absurd body! And why? Because my five creators thought that God wanted it that way!"