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View Full Version : BREAKING: Anyone who wants to be a CK should Date MILF



Pike
05-13-2012, 05:30 PM
MILF will never be a mod himself, of course, because that would take away his power. His power being that anyone who dates him inevitably becomes a mod. Feels good man.

ITT we talk about EoFF super powers. Or dating other EoFFers. Or something. I dunno, pick a topic. :jess:

Laddy
05-13-2012, 05:33 PM
I have a power of not being banned. Yay me!

Roto13
05-13-2012, 05:53 PM
Now I don't know who's dating who any more.

Hollycat
05-13-2012, 08:01 PM
I have the power of reincarnation.

Same here, I know nothing.

Parker
05-13-2012, 08:04 PM
i post a lot about semen/dongs/breasts and never get in trouble

sharkythesharkdogg
05-13-2012, 08:13 PM
I posted about things like Pike's serrated robo-gina, and raping DD with an almond butter slathered erection. No banning occurred.

Parker
05-13-2012, 08:24 PM
thanks. now im turgid.

krissy
05-13-2012, 08:32 PM
i am dating everybody

Jinx
05-13-2012, 08:38 PM
He has power through you.


I know because of Pontus.


I KNOW HUXLEY I KNOW

Sephex
05-13-2012, 11:08 PM
So who do you have to date to be an admin? That's the REAL question...

Rye
05-13-2012, 11:42 PM
Huxley threatens the shinra with his duck farts until his main squeeze gets in on the CK action.

fire_of_avalon
05-13-2012, 11:47 PM
I uh. I... got nothing.

Laddy
05-13-2012, 11:55 PM
You may not know this, but Jiro and I are totally dating. He's actually quite the sumbmissive one, too. He has no problems taking orders. :cool:

Agent Proto
05-14-2012, 01:16 AM
MILF will never be a mod himself, of course, because that would take away his power. His power being that anyone who dates him inevitably becomes a mod. Feels good man.

ITT we talk about EoFF super powers. Or dating other EoFFers. Or something. I dunno, pick a topic. :jess:

I don't know how this is breaking news, it's been fact for quite awhile now since you became mod.

Jiro
05-14-2012, 05:31 AM
Dating MILF got me my job on EoFF staff. Then he broke up with me and I got sad and fired :(

G13
05-14-2012, 08:10 AM
I have this uncanny ability to hate all of you.

Except you. You know who you are.

Pheesh
05-14-2012, 10:05 AM
So it's like Good Luck Chuck?

Congrats MILF, your life is a really bad Dane Cook movie.

Old Manus
05-14-2012, 12:49 PM
I slept with Psychotic under promises of making admin and immediately realised my mistake and that I was being used when I heard him shout 'Andy Carroll!' when he reached climax.

Yet he was the best I ever had

KentaRawr!
05-14-2012, 06:54 PM
In all my 19 years I have never been in a relationship.

Someone date me. :cry:

Jinx
05-14-2012, 06:58 PM
In all my 19 years I have never been in a relationship.

Someone date me. :cry:

Just show em yr boobies

KentaRawr!
05-14-2012, 07:17 PM
In all my 19 years I have never been in a relationship.

Someone date me. :cry:

Just show em yr boobies

I don't have those. :cool:

Pike
05-14-2012, 09:42 PM
In all my 19 years I have never been in a relationship.

Someone date me. :cry:

wtf Kent really? But you're so cute!

But yeah don't feel bad my first boyfriend happened when I was... I wanna say 22. Mighta been 21.

Peegee
05-14-2012, 10:46 PM
In all my 19 years I have never been in a relationship.

Someone date me. :cry:

I'm going to explain something that hopefully you won't do like everybody else and not listen:

don't chase girls. instead improve yourself.

in fact, your default action whenever in doubt is to better yourself.

Shlup
05-14-2012, 11:49 PM
Spoiler alert: Everyone on staff has dated MILF at one time or another.

His penis is... okay.

Crop
05-15-2012, 12:00 AM
I'm Jason Bourne.

Jinx
05-15-2012, 01:36 AM
In all my 19 years I have never been in a relationship.

Someone date me. :cry:

I'm going to explain something that hopefully you won't do like everybody else and not listen:

don't chase girls. instead improve yourself.

in fact, your default action whenever in doubt is to better yourself.

TREAT EM MEAN, KEEP EM KEEN!

Shiny
05-15-2012, 11:10 AM
This. Cannot. Beeee! He is way too tall. I'm pretty sure my face would align with his crotch.

Loony BoB
05-15-2012, 12:59 PM
To become admin, you must first register at EoFF and then have your daughter marry another admin. Good luck, everyone!

I have the opposite effect to MILF.

sharkythesharkdogg
05-15-2012, 04:20 PM
This. Cannot. Beeee! He is way too tall. I'm pretty sure my face would align with his crotch.

Sounds like the date would go really well.

Peegee
05-15-2012, 04:54 PM
In all my 19 years I have never been in a relationship.

Someone date me. :cry:

I'm going to explain something that hopefully you won't do like everybody else and not listen:

don't chase girls. instead improve yourself.

in fact, your default action whenever in doubt is to better yourself.

TREAT EM MEAN, KEEP EM KEEN!

Dislike.

Sephex
05-15-2012, 05:34 PM
In all my 19 years I have never been in a relationship.

Someone date me. :cry:


I'm going to explain something that hopefully you won't do like everybody else and not listen:

don't chase girls. instead improve yourself.

in fact, your default action whenever in doubt is to better yourself.

TREAT EM MEAN, KEEP EM KEEN!

I half agree with this. You shouldn't chase girls because even if you do it casually, most of them register that as a sign of desperation. You can scare of a girl that already decided that she wants to sleep with you at least 573 times a night if you appear desperate in the slightest.

However, I don't think you should come off as a cold, unfeeling asshole. As cliche as this sounds, just be yourself. This isn't an after school special sort of thing either. Even if you eventually pull off dating someone because you weren't acting like yourself, the mask comes off eventually.

TL;DR Keep your eyes open, but don't act desperate. Let things flow naturally and good things will come to you.

Jinx
05-15-2012, 06:04 PM
Obviously I was joking, hence the capital letters.

Don't try to get a girlfriend just to have a girlfriend. Make sure it's someone you truly like. Most relationships progress pretty naturally. Like, you meet someone you have something/a lot in common with, and you start to like each other--but you shouldn't force it. If it's someone good for you, it will just happen.

Renmiri
05-15-2012, 06:14 PM
Oh so that's why I am no longer staff!

Does saying Levian is sexy counts ?

Parker
05-15-2012, 06:15 PM
girls are gross!

Sephex
05-15-2012, 07:24 PM
Obviously I was joking, hence the capital letters.

Don't try to get a girlfriend just to have a girlfriend. Make sure it's someone you truly like. Most relationships progress pretty naturally. Like, you meet someone you have something/a lot in common with, and you start to like each other--but you shouldn't force it. If it's someone good for you, it will just happen.

I knew you were joking, but there are way too many people that actually believe that. Was on break at work (as I am now) and felt like throwing my two cents in! ;)

Madame Adequate
05-15-2012, 10:42 PM
Spoiler alert: Everyone on staff has dated MILF at one time or another.

His penis is... okay.

That's not what Miriel, Psy, or Face said!

It's kinder than what Monda said though.

Peegee
05-15-2012, 10:57 PM
In all my 19 years I have never been in a relationship.

Someone date me. :cry:


I'm going to explain something that hopefully you won't do like everybody else and not listen:

don't chase girls. instead improve yourself.

in fact, your default action whenever in doubt is to better yourself.

TREAT EM MEAN, KEEP EM KEEN!

I half agree with this. You shouldn't chase girls because even if you do it casually, most of them register that as a sign of desperation. You can scare of a girl that already decided that she wants to sleep with you at least 573 times a night if you appear desperate in the slightest.

However, I don't think you should come off as a cold, unfeeling asshole. As cliche as this sounds, just be yourself. This isn't an after school special sort of thing either. Even if you eventually pull off dating someone because you weren't acting like yourself, the mask comes off eventually.

TL;DR Keep your eyes open, but don't act desperate. Let things flow naturally and good things will come to you.

YEAH BUT WHEN DO I MAKE PHYSICAL CONTACT? AFTER EXACTLY HOW MANY SECONDS? AND SHE SPENT 3843.22 SECONDS BETWEEN TEXTS THIS ONE TIME - DOES THAT MEAN ANYTHING???????????????????

Sephex
05-15-2012, 11:29 PM
In all my 19 years I have never been in a relationship.

Someone date me. :cry:


I'm going to explain something that hopefully you won't do like everybody else and not listen:

don't chase girls. instead improve yourself.

in fact, your default action whenever in doubt is to better yourself.

TREAT EM MEAN, KEEP EM KEEN!

I half agree with this. You shouldn't chase girls because even if you do it casually, most of them register that as a sign of desperation. You can scare of a girl that already decided that she wants to sleep with you at least 573 times a night if you appear desperate in the slightest.

However, I don't think you should come off as a cold, unfeeling asshole. As cliche as this sounds, just be yourself. This isn't an after school special sort of thing either. Even if you eventually pull off dating someone because you weren't acting like yourself, the mask comes off eventually.

TL;DR Keep your eyes open, but don't act desperate. Let things flow naturally and good things will come to you.

YEAH BUT WHEN DO I MAKE PHYSICAL CONTACT? AFTER EXACTLY HOW MANY SECONDS? AND SHE SPENT 3843.22 SECONDS BETWEEN TEXTS THIS ONE TIME - DOES THAT MEAN ANYTHING???????????????????

Send her a pic of your erect penis with a smiley face drawn at the tip. Or draw eyes around the pee hole so it looks like a mouth. Then send a video of you making your penis talk telling how much you've been in love with her for the last half week. She'll think its cute.

Jinx
05-15-2012, 11:40 PM
One time my ex sent me a picture of his penis, so I used the editor on my phone to insert a smiley face sticker that had hearts for eyes, then I sent it back to him.


He wasn't pleased.

KentaRawr!
05-15-2012, 11:57 PM
In all my 19 years I have never been in a relationship.

Someone date me. :cry:

I'm going to explain something that hopefully you won't do like everybody else and not listen:

don't chase girls. instead improve yourself.

in fact, your default action whenever in doubt is to better yourself.

TREAT EM MEAN, KEEP EM KEEN!

Dislike.

I'm not actually pursuing a relationship right now, but thanks for the advice! xD



In all my 19 years I have never been in a relationship.

Someone date me. :cry:

wtf Kent really? But you're so cute!

But yeah don't feel bad my first boyfriend happened when I was... I wanna say 22. Mighta been 21.

Oh youuuuu :greenie: But yeah I'm in no rush at all for that sort of thing. I just need to focus on school right now. And getting a job. Blurmp

Sephex
05-16-2012, 01:07 AM
One time my ex sent me a picture of his penis, so I used the editor on my phone to insert a smiley face sticker that had hearts for eyes, then I sent it back to him.


He wasn't pleased.

I would have laughed my ass off. Then send a pic replicating the edited pic as close as possible.

Madame Adequate
05-21-2012, 07:34 PM
As an update to this thread, I don't even need to use my penis. Other parts are quite sufficient, judging from Steph's warm and satisfied glow. :)

Pike
05-21-2012, 07:54 PM
I don't know how this is breaking news, it's been fact for quite awhile now since you became mod.

Mostly I just thought it would be funny to put "BREAKING" in the title, cause I dunno.


As an update to this thread, I don't even need to use my penis. Other parts are quite sufficient, judging from Steph's warm and satisfied glow. :)

It's because I'm recharging my power supply. We robots have to do that, you know.

nik0tine
05-21-2012, 08:32 PM
This. Cannot. Beeee! He is way too tall. I'm pretty sure my face would align with his crotch.
but thats so perfect.

Peegee
05-22-2012, 10:44 PM
Milf advised me of his penis size once. I demand confirmation.

Jiro
05-23-2012, 06:01 PM
I couldn't possibly tell! :blush:

Peegee
05-23-2012, 10:23 PM
I couldn't possibly tell! :blush:

Is it bigger than mine?

I know the answer to this question. I need confirmation from you to make sure you aren't lying.

theundeadhero
05-23-2012, 11:27 PM
kikimm disappeared from EOFF shortly before I became a CK. What does this mean? No... let's not talk about that.

Jiro
05-26-2012, 07:57 PM
I couldn't possibly tell! :blush:

Is it bigger than mine?

I know the answer to this question. I need confirmation from you to make sure you aren't lying.

Well you know what they say. Being azn means never having to hear "it's too big we can't have sex."

They also say those with big feet have big hands if you know what I mean. Wink. :aimkiss:

krissy
05-26-2012, 08:06 PM
i dunno about that. i got huge ass hobbit feet but i got the smallest case of micropenis ever. i got little sponges attached to the end of tweezers iykwim.

Peegee
05-26-2012, 11:37 PM
yeah but joo so crazy

Jinx
05-28-2012, 05:02 AM
i dunno about that. i got huge ass hobbit feet but i got the smallest case of micropenis ever. i got little sponges attached to the end of tweezers iykwim.

I love micropenis, just ask Rantz.