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Bubba
07-04-2012, 02:53 PM
Ok, so I just had to share this story.

I was on a date last night that was set up by a mutual friend. We met in a bar for a few drinks and it was a very pleasant atmosphere. She seemed very nervous but I didn't mind that and I tried to make her feel as relaxed as possible.

Things were going well up until the time she needed to go to the toilet. Her chair was tucked in tight under the table and she had a long coat over the back. I checked my phone as she made to get up... I looked up pretty sharply though when I heard a loud bang and noticed my date and her chair were nowhere to be seen. She was lying on her back on the floor in a particularly unflattering way.

Myself and a guy from another table immediately helped her up asking whether she was OK. She was physically OK but very embarrassed and was in the toilet for close to 15 minutes. When she came back she seemed fine and I told her not to worry... she just kept saying how stupid she felt.

I bought her another couple of drinks and she seemed to calm down and things were just getting comfortable again. She once again excused herself to the go to the toilet and I jokingly said "Be careful, this time!"

It seemed to happen in slow motion as her chair snagged on her coat, she stiffened... and once again disappeared from sight over the edge of the table. I made to help her again but she quickly (and quite ungracefully) made it onto her own feet. I asked her if she was OK... she said yes but she had to leave. She grabbed her coat and pretty much ran out of the bar. I had to have another drink at the bar while I reflected on the evenings events...

Any of you had any dates where it was your date, as opposed to yourself, who embarrassed themselves?

Jinx
07-04-2012, 03:04 PM
No, I'm freakin' smooth.

Psychotic
07-04-2012, 03:15 PM
I was on a date with this really classy chick, Russian, right? Deep green eyes, gigantic mouth. Bit two dimensional but I can live with that. We were at this restaurant downtown, and although the evening was going well, I think she was getting a bit tired as by the end of it she was losing her energy and getting a bit deflated. She still seemed to be enjoying it though so whatever. The odd thing was that people keep looking at our table with these looks on their faces, and I'm wondering what is going on. Turns out she got a puncture. :redface:

sharkythesharkdogg
07-04-2012, 04:15 PM
When I was dating a high school girlfriend, I went to her house to pick her up for our first date. I walked inside, and her dad yelled up stairs that I had arrived.

She was so excited that she tripped, fell, and rolled unceremoniously down the entire flight of stairs, coming to a stop at my feet. I of course helped her up, and she was physically okay.

She managed to do this the next two times I came to pick her up for a date. That probably should have warned me. :|

escobert
07-04-2012, 04:21 PM
No, noone wants to go on dates with me :(

Sephex
07-04-2012, 04:56 PM
I once met up with a girl through an online dating service. She seems pretty nice until I noticed that her teeth were either dark yellow or black. I quickly made an excuse to leave and offered to walk her out. We get outside and her mom and a bunch of her siblings/cousins are in a minivan. Her mom is clutching prayer beads shaking, presumable nervous about her mid 20s daughter daring to go on a date.

The girl still texted me that she had a great time and asked to hang out again.

Nope.

Bubba
07-04-2012, 05:32 PM
When I was dating a high school girlfriend, I went to her house to pick her up for our first date. I walked inside, and her dad yelled up stairs that I had arrived.

She was so excited that she tripped, fell, and rolled unceremoniously down the entire flight of stairs, coming to a stop at my feet. I of course helped her up, and she was physically okay.

She managed to do this the next two times I came to pick her up for a date. That probably should have warned me. :|

This could very well be the same girl... small world!


I once met up with a girl through an online dating service. She seems pretty nice until I noticed that her teeth were either dark yellow or black. I quickly made an excuse to leave and offered to walk her out. We get outside and her mom and a bunch of her siblings/cousins are in a minivan. Her mom is clutching prayer beads shaking, presumable nervous about her mid 20s daughter daring to go on a date.

The girl still texted me that she had a great time and asked to hang out again.

Nope.

Do you still have her number?

Sephex
07-04-2012, 05:38 PM
When I was dating a high school girlfriend, I went to her house to pick her up for our first date. I walked inside, and her dad yelled up stairs that I had arrived.

She was so excited that she tripped, fell, and rolled unceremoniously down the entire flight of stairs, coming to a stop at my feet. I of course helped her up, and she was physically okay.

She managed to do this the next two times I came to pick her up for a date. That probably should have warned me. :|

This could very well be the same girl... small world!


I once met up with a girl through an online dating service. She seems pretty nice until I noticed that her teeth were either dark yellow or black. I quickly made an excuse to leave and offered to walk her out. We get outside and her mom and a bunch of her siblings/cousins are in a minivan. Her mom is clutching prayer beads shaking, presumable nervous about her mid 20s daughter daring to go on a date.

The girl still texted me that she had a great time and asked to hang out again.

Nope.

Do you still have her number?

No, but I had it stored in my phone for the longest time so I knew to avoid calls or texts if they happened. For the record this happened four years ago or so.

Sylvie
07-04-2012, 05:40 PM
I seldom went on dates, but I never fucked up anything. Every single girl that I wanted, I got.

Raistlin
07-04-2012, 05:54 PM
I was on a date with this really classy chick, Russian, right? Deep green eyes, gigantic mouth. Bit two dimensional but I can live with that. We were at this restaurant downtown, and although the evening was going well, I think she was getting a bit tired as by the end of it she was losing her energy and getting a bit deflated. She still seemed to be enjoying it though so whatever. The odd thing was that people keep looking at our table with these looks on their faces, and I'm wondering what is going on. Turns out she got a puncture. :redface:

Did you sing this song (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e6raVzrbqrM) for her?

Quindiana Jones
07-04-2012, 06:32 PM
Aww, I feel really bad for Bubba's date. :(

Slothy
07-04-2012, 06:57 PM
Aww, I feel really bad for Bubba's date. :(

His sexiness probably left her too flustered to remember the proper operational procedures for the chair.

Bubba
07-04-2012, 06:58 PM
Aww, I feel really bad for Bubba's date. :(

I felt bad too.

I sent her a text today telling her not to feel too embarrassed and that it didn't matter...

..and that I wouldn't have asked her out again anyway due to her appalling physical appearance.

EDIT: I'm obvioulsy joking, she was lovely and I did text her today to see if she wanted to try again. She hasn't replied yet though...

Tigmafuzz
07-04-2012, 07:43 PM
I seldom went on dates, but I never smurfed up anything. Every single girl that I wanted, I got.

:up:

Versaille
07-04-2012, 08:14 PM
I ate pizza on this date and let's just say it didn't set well with me. So we drove around a bit afterwards to talk some, except I was hurting so bad, I couldn't find any strength to talk and was too focused on my "issue." Finally, he got so bored he dropped me off and I went home and took care of my problem. It was excruciating holding it. He was nice and asked me on a second date but we never went out because I probably bored him to death the first time.

I feel sorry for the girl Bubba was with, I mean, probably wasn't her day.

krissy
07-04-2012, 08:18 PM
He was nice and asked me on a second date but we never went out because I probably bored him to death the first time.

?___?

NorthernChaosGod
07-04-2012, 09:12 PM
Guize, he's asking if your dates have ever been the ones embarrassed, not yourselves.

Bubba
07-04-2012, 10:00 PM
Guize, he's asking if your dates have ever been the ones embarrassed, not yourselves.

Thank you, Mr God!

I think a few people may have misread my question.

Jinx
07-04-2012, 10:02 PM
Well in that case...

I always make men nervous. ;)

Tigmafuzz
07-04-2012, 10:05 PM
I don't think I've ever been the one embarrassed, actually. One date I had a while back resulted in a her throwing up all over the guy in front of her in the theater. The back of his head was so... colorful.

And another time, I was on a double date with a friend, and when the girls went to the bathroom, they both walked into the same wall at the same time. It was quite hilarious.

Versaille
07-04-2012, 10:11 PM
I didn't misread, I just wanted to share my awful story.

Psychotic
07-04-2012, 10:47 PM
Well in that case...

I always make men nervous. ;)"What if this creepy chick is going to become a crazy stalker? How long 'til I wake up to find her next to me in bed, wearing only my best female friend's blood and a huge smile?" goes a bit beyond plain ol' nervous in my book. :holmes:

Tigmafuzz
07-04-2012, 10:53 PM
"What if this creepy chick is going to become a crazy stalker?"

I've actually had that thought before. I rather enjoyed it. Unfortunately, she did not become my stalker. She was a boring filthy casual.

Someone else did become my stalker, though. Although that is a tale for another day.

Iceglow
07-04-2012, 11:22 PM
I went on a blind date once with a friends girlfriend's best mate. Well lets say she wasn't what I'd go for in a million years but out of politeness I decided to go through with the date because hell you don't upset your best mate's girlfriend that'd deny the bro any chance of getting laid for a month. Not on this stake.

Well, over the course of the night we went to a club, where she propositioned me with drugs which is a major turn off for me. She then proceeded to take some ecstasy tablets regardless not guessing my expression was a "disgusted look" and have a reaction to a chemical in them. I spent the later part of the night and most of the next morning in the local A&E having to look after her and explaining to my mate's girlfriend why she was in a hospital and finding out who the hell I ought to contact from her phone. It was even more awkward having to call her mother to tell her that her daughter had done class A drugs and was in hospital and I was some random friend of a friend who'd been out on a date with her. I was accused of being a drugs pusher for that, unfortunately for me the complete scrub of a girl didn't even have the decency to explain/claim otherwise.

Cuchulainn
07-04-2012, 11:29 PM
Ecstacy is safer than alcohol. In fact as long as you take it responsibly it's harmless. smurf knows what was in that pill. I take it now n then. Better than drinking.

Pure Ecstasy Safe For Use, Canadian Official Says (http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/06/14/pure-ecstasy-safe-for-use_n_1597007.html)

Bubba
07-04-2012, 11:40 PM
I didn't misread, I just wanted to share my awful story.

I'm glad you shared. This thread is now open to any embarrassing date story!


I went on a blind date once with a friends girlfriend's best mate. Well lets say she wasn't what I'd go for in a million years but out of politeness I decided to go through with the date because hell you don't upset your best mate's girlfriend that'd deny the bro any chance of getting laid for a month. Not on this stake.

Well, over the course of the night we went to a club, where she propositioned me with drugs which is a major turn off for me. She then proceeded to take some ecstasy tablets regardless not guessing my expression was a "disgusted look" and have a reaction to a chemical in them. I spent the later part of the night and most of the next morning in the local A&E having to look after her and explaining to my mate's girlfriend why she was in a hospital and finding out who the hell I ought to contact from her phone. It was even more awkward having to call her mother to tell her that her daughter had done class A drugs and was in hospital and I was some random friend of a friend who'd been out on a date with her. I was accused of being a drugs pusher for that, unfortunately for me the complete scrub of a girl didn't even have the decency to explain/claim otherwise.

My night doesn't seem at all bad now!

Rocket Edge
07-05-2012, 12:38 AM
Ecstacy is safer than alcohol. In fact as long as you take it responsibly it's harmless. smurf knows what was in that pill. I take it now n then. Better than drinking.

Pure Ecstasy Safe For Use, Canadian Official Says (http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/06/14/pure-ecstasy-safe-for-use_n_1597007.html)
Wasn't it once a recreational drug or that? If that's the case then it must be. :spin:

I think the only time I've ever met girls was meeting them out for a drink. Can't think of any major embarrassing stories.

Iceglow
07-05-2012, 12:47 AM
Ecstacy is safer than alcohol. In fact as long as you take it responsibly it's harmless. smurf knows what was in that pill. I take it now n then. Better than drinking.

Pure Ecstasy Safe For Use, Canadian Official Says (http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/06/14/pure-ecstasy-safe-for-use_n_1597007.html)

We had been drinking by this point already, could be a reaction to the alcohol I guess. Hell I don't remember it was years ago thankfully. I just don't need recreational drugs (other than alcohol which I don't need, I just enjoy) I've experimented but I've never found anything to actually be worth the side effects.



My night doesn't seem at all bad now!

hahaha yeah that was a bad, bad date. Not the worst date I ever had though the worst one probably was my fault not my dates.

Quindiana Jones
07-05-2012, 01:54 AM
Well, now we have to hear it, Steve. xD

Iceglow
07-05-2012, 02:45 AM
Well, now we have to hear it, Steve. xD

I think you know the story actually but fine for those who haven't heard it and want to know how bad a date can go? Here goes...

Below is the honest to God... so fucking help me, true story of the worst date I ever had! And it was all my fault!

I was about 16/17 at the time and went to a rock club with a girl (Lauren) from college. She was cute I was definitely digging her and the events of that night ruined any chance of us ever hooking up properly. We were underage, so sue us lol... were were also stupid.

Outside the club we got smashed on like 6 cans of fosters and a liter bottle of vodka. Now that in itself back in those days would be enough to put me in the ground I weighed nothing, I had no tolerance built up it was my first time ever clubbing, stupidly tried to keep up with people who could drink me under without thinking bout it because I wanted to impress the girl. Somehow we still got in even though I was literally almost falling over drunk!

Inside the club I don't remember much, bit of a mosh pit, bit of a wander round, a dance, some making out and then sitting in the chill out room with her friends who were in the club as well. One of her friends offered me some of her drink because she didn't feel up to it. Stupidly drunk as I was I accepted this half glass of JD and Coke and proceeded to down it.

Unknown to the pair of us, the drink had been spiked with Ketamine... fun times. Thankfully (I rather I take the hit than a girl have my morals by this point) the girl escaped with being pretty sick and getting carried home by friends. I on the other hand had already drunk enough to knock out a baby fucking elephant let alone a 16/17 year old idiot me.

I wound up blacking out and suffering cardiac and respiratory problems. I was carried outside on to the street by a bouncer and there the girl I was on the date with (Lauren) had to help him perform mouth to mouth resuscitation and cpr to bring me back from being technically a dead man. I was then force fed chips and milk to make me void my stomach, people have told me since this was probably a stupid idea but at the time it got me from being a total wreck to being actually conscious enough to groggily talk to people. By the time the ambulance called for me arrived I was actually standing up and leaning on the wall. The ambulance crew legally had to ask me to go hospital they couldn't force me even though I'd been dead less than an hour ago. It's at this point I said the only thing that night that the bouncer remembered which was "I'm alive, I'm breathing and I'm standing, I'll live... do me a favour? Please? Piss off and save someone who needs saving don't worry yourselves on my stupid drunk ass" (we didn't know I'd been spiked at this point)

After a while the bouncer was literally like "Ok darlin, either take him home or go inside." to Lauren and she had to go upstairs to get her things from the locker room, she decided that to prevent me getting mugged she had to "mug" me herself and so she did. Lauren had my phone, travel card, keys, cash, the works was on her. However when she went upstairs to get her stuff I ended up apparently deciding I'd had enough waiting and went home. I don't remember getting on the night bus, in fact I don't remember an awful lot about any of this, the night had to be reconstructed slowly in pieces a few days later. Somehow the night bus driver agreed to let me ride the bus for free, probably intended to drop me at the Whittingdon hospital in Archway but forgot when I disappeared in the crowd. Well. I made it to Finchley, approximately 3 miles from my house and had no hope of walking it, I could barely bloody stand. I'd fallen over getting off the bus and had blood pouring from a small cut in my face. A drunk guy took pity on me and called me a cab to get me the rest of the way home.

I rocked up on my mom's doorstep about 10 mins later in a cab at about 4am. I then had to wake my mother up because I had no means to pay the taxi. My mother as I'm sure many of you can imagine... was less than impressed. About a day later when I still felt ill my Mom insisted I go to the doctors and so I went where he did a blood test. Legally had I been a driver I still would've been over the limit to do so. Fucking good job I did! The results of the blood test a few days later then revealed my blood had traces of Ketamine which involved a awkward discussion bout drug abuse with my GP.

About 3 days after the event I eventually bumped in to Lauren, Lauren lived like 2 mins from my home but we'd kinda avoided each other since. (well for 1 day I couldn't even bloody move hahaha) This was when she eventually returned my belongings and we went for a coffee and we pieced together the process of the night, I'd scared her so bad with the whole being dead thing and she was exceptionally mad at me for telling the ambulance to save someone else even if I had been a bloody legend for saying it. We both kinda looked at each other and was like "yeah... should do this again sometime?" we eventually went clubbing together again but it was very, very awkward and we never once so much as went beyond holding hands after that.

So essentially the worst date I ever had, I drank too much trying to impress a girl (yes, there was a time I wasn't smooth skilled and sophisticated) managed to get spiked and then literally died on her in the street.

Bubba
07-05-2012, 04:10 AM
Well, now we have to hear it, Steve. xD

I think you know the story actually but fine for those who haven't heard it and want to know how bad a date can go? Here goes...

Below is the honest to God... so smurfing help me, true story of the worst date I ever had! And it was all my fault!

I was about 16/17 at the time and went to a rock club with a girl (Lauren) from college. She was cute I was definitely digging her and the events of that night ruined any chance of us ever hooking up properly. We were underage, so sue us lol... were were also stupid.

Outside the club we got smashed on like 6 cans of fosters and a liter bottle of vodka. Now that in itself back in those days would be enough to put me in the ground I weighed nothing, I had no tolerance built up it was my first time ever clubbing, stupidly tried to keep up with people who could drink me under without thinking bout it because I wanted to impress the girl. Somehow we still got in even though I was literally almost falling over drunk!

Inside the club I don't remember much, bit of a mosh pit, bit of a wander round, a dance, some making out and then sitting in the chill out room with her friends who were in the club as well. One of her friends offered me some of her drink because she didn't feel up to it. Stupidly drunk as I was I accepted this half glass of JD and Coke and proceeded to down it.

Unknown to the pair of us, the drink had been spiked with Ketamine... fun times. Thankfully (I rather I take the hit than a girl have my morals by this point) the girl escaped with being pretty sick and getting carried home by friends. I on the other hand had already drunk enough to knock out a baby smurfing elephant let alone a 16/17 year old idiot me.

I wound up blacking out and suffering cardiac and respiratory problems. I was carried outside on to the street by a bouncer and there the girl I was on the date with (Lauren) had to help him perform mouth to mouth resuscitation and cpr to bring me back from being technically a dead man. I was then force fed chips and milk to make me void my stomach, people have told me since this was probably a stupid idea but at the time it got me from being a total wreck to being actually conscious enough to groggily talk to people. By the time the ambulance called for me arrived I was actually standing up and leaning on the wall. The ambulance crew legally had to ask me to go hospital they couldn't force me even though I'd been dead less than an hour ago. It's at this point I said the only thing that night that the bouncer remembered which was "I'm alive, I'm breathing and I'm standing, I'll live... do me a favour? Please? Piss off and save someone who needs saving don't worry yourselves on my stupid drunk ass" (we didn't know I'd been spiked at this point)

After a while the bouncer was literally like "Ok darlin, either take him home or go inside." to Lauren and she had to go upstairs to get her things from the locker room, she decided that to prevent me getting mugged she had to "mug" me herself and so she did. Lauren had my phone, travel card, keys, cash, the works was on her. However when she went upstairs to get her stuff I ended up apparently deciding I'd had enough waiting and went home. I don't remember getting on the night bus, in fact I don't remember an awful lot about any of this, the night had to be reconstructed slowly in pieces a few days later. Somehow the night bus driver agreed to let me ride the bus for free, probably intended to drop me at the Whittingdon hospital in Archway but forgot when I disappeared in the crowd. Well. I made it to Finchley, approximately 3 miles from my house and had no hope of walking it, I could barely bloody stand. I'd fallen over getting off the bus and had blood pouring from a small cut in my face. A drunk guy took pity on me and called me a cab to get me the rest of the way home.

I rocked up on my mom's doorstep about 10 mins later in a cab at about 4am. I then had to wake my mother up because I had no means to pay the taxi. My mother as I'm sure many of you can imagine... was less than impressed. About a day later when I still felt ill my Mom insisted I go to the doctors and so I went where he did a blood test. Legally had I been a driver I still would've been over the limit to do so. smurfing good job I did! The results of the blood test a few days later then revealed my blood had traces of Ketamine which involved a awkward discussion bout drug abuse with my GP.

About 3 days after the event I eventually bumped in to Lauren, Lauren lived like 2 mins from my home but we'd kinda avoided each other since. (well for 1 day I couldn't even bloody move hahaha) This was when she eventually returned my belongings and we went for a coffee and we pieced together the process of the night, I'd scared her so bad with the whole being dead thing and she was exceptionally mad at me for telling the ambulance to save someone else even if I had been a bloody legend for saying it. We both kinda looked at each other and was like "yeah... should do this again sometime?" we eventually went clubbing together again but it was very, very awkward and we never once so much as went beyond holding hands after that.

So essentially the worst date I ever had, I drank too much trying to impress a girl (yes, there was a time I wasn't smooth skilled and sophisticated) managed to get spiked and then literally died on her in the street.

Fuck me.

Jinx
07-05-2012, 04:51 AM
I went on a blind date once with a friends girlfriend's best mate. Well lets say she wasn't what I'd go for in a million years but out of politeness I decided to go through with the date because hell you don't upset your best mate's girlfriend that'd deny the bro any chance of getting laid for a month. Not on this stake.

Well, over the course of the night we went to a club, where she propositioned me with drugs which is a major turn off for me. She then proceeded to take some ecstasy tablets regardless not guessing my expression was a "disgusted look" and have a reaction to a chemical in them. I spent the later part of the night and most of the next morning in the local A&E having to look after her and explaining to my mate's girlfriend why she was in a hospital and finding out who the hell I ought to contact from her phone. It was even more awkward having to call her mother to tell her that her daughter had done class A drugs and was in hospital and I was some random friend of a friend who'd been out on a date with her. I was accused of being a drugs pusher for that, unfortunately for me the complete scrub of a girl didn't even have the decency to explain/claim otherwise.

fu kin women.



Well, now we have to hear it, Steve. xD

I think you know the story actually but fine for those who haven't heard it and want to know how bad a date can go? Here goes...

Below is the honest to God... so smurfing help me, true story of the worst date I ever had! And it was all my fault!

I was about 16/17 at the time and went to a rock club with a girl (Lauren) from college. She was cute I was definitely digging her and the events of that night ruined any chance of us ever hooking up properly. We were underage, so sue us lol... were were also stupid.

Outside the club we got smashed on like 6 cans of fosters and a liter bottle of vodka. Now that in itself back in those days would be enough to put me in the ground I weighed nothing, I had no tolerance built up it was my first time ever clubbing, stupidly tried to keep up with people who could drink me under without thinking bout it because I wanted to impress the girl. Somehow we still got in even though I was literally almost falling over drunk!

Inside the club I don't remember much, bit of a mosh pit, bit of a wander round, a dance, some making out and then sitting in the chill out room with her friends who were in the club as well. One of her friends offered me some of her drink because she didn't feel up to it. Stupidly drunk as I was I accepted this half glass of JD and Coke and proceeded to down it.

Unknown to the pair of us, the drink had been spiked with Ketamine... fun times. Thankfully (I rather I take the hit than a girl have my morals by this point) the girl escaped with being pretty sick and getting carried home by friends. I on the other hand had already drunk enough to knock out a baby smurfing elephant let alone a 16/17 year old idiot me.

I wound up blacking out and suffering cardiac and respiratory problems. I was carried outside on to the street by a bouncer and there the girl I was on the date with (Lauren) had to help him perform mouth to mouth resuscitation and cpr to bring me back from being technically a dead man. I was then force fed chips and milk to make me void my stomach, people have told me since this was probably a stupid idea but at the time it got me from being a total wreck to being actually conscious enough to groggily talk to people. By the time the ambulance called for me arrived I was actually standing up and leaning on the wall. The ambulance crew legally had to ask me to go hospital they couldn't force me even though I'd been dead less than an hour ago. It's at this point I said the only thing that night that the bouncer remembered which was "I'm alive, I'm breathing and I'm standing, I'll live... do me a favour? Please? Piss off and save someone who needs saving don't worry yourselves on my stupid drunk ass" (we didn't know I'd been spiked at this point)

After a while the bouncer was literally like "Ok darlin, either take him home or go inside." to Lauren and she had to go upstairs to get her things from the locker room, she decided that to prevent me getting mugged she had to "mug" me herself and so she did. Lauren had my phone, travel card, keys, cash, the works was on her. However when she went upstairs to get her stuff I ended up apparently deciding I'd had enough waiting and went home. I don't remember getting on the night bus, in fact I don't remember an awful lot about any of this, the night had to be reconstructed slowly in pieces a few days later. Somehow the night bus driver agreed to let me ride the bus for free, probably intended to drop me at the Whittingdon hospital in Archway but forgot when I disappeared in the crowd. Well. I made it to Finchley, approximately 3 miles from my house and had no hope of walking it, I could barely bloody stand. I'd fallen over getting off the bus and had blood pouring from a small cut in my face. A drunk guy took pity on me and called me a cab to get me the rest of the way home.

I rocked up on my mom's doorstep about 10 mins later in a cab at about 4am. I then had to wake my mother up because I had no means to pay the taxi. My mother as I'm sure many of you can imagine... was less than impressed. About a day later when I still felt ill my Mom insisted I go to the doctors and so I went where he did a blood test. Legally had I been a driver I still would've been over the limit to do so. smurfing good job I did! The results of the blood test a few days later then revealed my blood had traces of Ketamine which involved a awkward discussion bout drug abuse with my GP.

About 3 days after the event I eventually bumped in to Lauren, Lauren lived like 2 mins from my home but we'd kinda avoided each other since. (well for 1 day I couldn't even bloody move hahaha) This was when she eventually returned my belongings and we went for a coffee and we pieced together the process of the night, I'd scared her so bad with the whole being dead thing and she was exceptionally mad at me for telling the ambulance to save someone else even if I had been a bloody legend for saying it. We both kinda looked at each other and was like "yeah... should do this again sometime?" we eventually went clubbing together again but it was very, very awkward and we never once so much as went beyond holding hands after that.

So essentially the worst date I ever had, I drank too much trying to impress a girl (yes, there was a time I wasn't smooth skilled and sophisticated) managed to get spiked and then literally died on her in the street.



am i the only one who's gonna call you out and say i think all of this is a fucking lie?

Iceglow
07-05-2012, 05:58 AM
You could call me out and call it a lie. However you'd be wrongfully calling me out on it. It's the honest damn truth, down to the very words said to the paramedic, quantities of alcohol drunk and the issues with cpr/mouth to mouth. If I was going to lie about the worst date I ever had based on my own fault I could just say I went on a date with you and couldn't get it up.

Sylvie
07-05-2012, 06:02 AM
If I was going to lie about the worst date I ever had based on my own fault I could just say I went on a date with you and couldn't get it up.
stellar move

Slothy
07-05-2012, 02:15 PM
If I was going to lie about the worst date I ever had based on my own fault I could just say I went on a date with you and couldn't get it up.

You could, but not being able to get it up with Ms. Boobs would be even more unbelievable.

Shattered Dreamer
07-05-2012, 05:22 PM
The worst date I've ever been on was a double date with my best mate & his girlfriend who was trying to set me up with her friend. The night was going all right I guess but I noticed she really didn't like it when I disagreed with something she said. Anyway she made some reference to the fact her father was a judge & how they had been having dinner with the Chief Justice of the Irish Supreme Court & when I asked her who the Chief Justice was she flipped out at me because apparently even while pretty drunk a Law student like myself should be able to remember who the Chief Justice was.

She then proceeded to tell me I was a total a$$hole who was disagreeing with her all night just to get a reaction, then I got pi$$ed off & told her to take a chill pill basically. We then descended into a full blown row in the middle of Grafton St in Dublin to the point where a Cop who was walking told us to shut up & go home or he would arrest us. Anyway the whole almost getting arrested caused us to calm down & we walked back to my place with my best mate & his girlfriend.

Anyway on the way home she was getting a little handsy so my intentions then became get her back to my room asap. Unfortunately when we got back to the house my room mate who I was sharing with, who was still awake playing XBOX mind you, refused to leave the room effectively c*ckblocking me. She slepted on the sofa & I went to bed alone.

Thus concludes the story of my worst date ever

Madame Adequate
07-05-2012, 06:50 PM
If I was going to lie about the worst date I ever had based on my own fault I could just say I went on a date with you and couldn't get it up.
stellar move

Right? The retarded adult man with the mentality of a 4 year old who I take care of could come up with a better rebuttal than that.

I'm starting to find myself increasingly enamored with you, Tifa's Boobs.

Rocket Edge
07-05-2012, 06:56 PM
Haha great story Shattered Dreamer. Did you not go in and have a word with your friend? I'm surprised he didn't cop on to it though in the first place.

Slothy
07-05-2012, 07:52 PM
I'm surprised he didn't cop on to it though in the first place.

Indeed. He's either an idiot who didn't catch on or an asshole who did. Either that or he was playing a really good game and totally in the zone.

Shattered Dreamer
07-05-2012, 11:43 PM
Haha great story Shattered Dreamer. Did you not go in and have a word with your friend? I'm surprised he didn't cop on to it though in the first place.

This particular friend used to be a terrible c*ckblocker, especially if he wasn't getting any himself :/ In the end it was for the best, that chick was completely bonkers :lol:

Cuchulainn
07-06-2012, 01:15 AM
smurfin hell steve...you gotta set up some sort of brain to keyboard filter system. you're becoming a caricature of yourself. That's never good. From the times I've spoke to you you seem to be a decent wee fella. The constant to make ppl on the internet believe you're some sort of ladykiller has become a comedy. Now I'm not saying you're NOT Loverman Steve I'm just saying constant references to it HERE are unnecessary and get you no where. Like I said you're a decent fella just.....reign it in.

I'm going to smurfing bed.

Shiny
07-06-2012, 03:14 AM
It wasn't my date, it was my friend's (*~Angel Wing~*) date...

I was the third wheel because she couldn't trust him enough to be alone with him. That should have been a red herring right there. Well anyway dude had a really bald head. Half way through the night he complained that his head was cold, and that he shouldn't have shaved it the night before, but said he did it because he was trying to look sexy for her. Mind you, his head was all kinds of odd shapes.

Then he was trying to impress her by throwing his phone up in the air and catching it, but instead of catching it it dropped on the floor; breaking into several pieces. Then to make matters worse, there was a puddle of water on the table from a drink he just spilled, and he showed her the puddle with his phone (as if it weren't damaged enough). He took his phone and pointed with it right in the puddle; getting it all wet. Then went, "tit MY PHONE IS ALL WET". Also everyone around town kept calling him Tony even though his name was Chris...or at least that's what he said his name was. My friend stopped going out with him thank God.

Rocket Edge
07-06-2012, 04:54 AM
I'm going to smurfing bed.
Goodnight pal. I have been out all night and this 1st class communion tune will not get out of my head.

Jesus sat down on the shade of a tree, and told the people come sit by me,
he told all the children with each loving smile, that Jesus loves you all day long...

RECOGNIZE

Miss Lady Shelly
07-11-2012, 07:16 AM
About two years ago i was talking to this one dude online and everything seemed alright till i met him..

So i met up with him and his buddy at the mall and we ended up going over to some bar in Indiana (im about 30 min from there), got wasted beyond belief. He was about 20 times worse than i was and he kept leaving me with his buddies and disappearing every so often for god knows how long.

So after that we ended up chilling at his other buddy's house and things got way out of hand at that point. Fist fights and everything else and im sitting on the sofa thinking to myself i need to get the hell out of here. After about 3 hrs of this i finally had enough and demaded they take me home. Sure enough him and his buddy were still at it on the ride home. Thank god i got home safely.

The dude had said this "Im sorry this is just how we are" and i said Right.. and he then had the nerve to ask me if he could stay the night and i said NO Sorry that's not a good idea. and then he said okie and that he would call me soon.

Not even a day later he called me and said he had a good time and wanted to hang out with me again. I said Sure/whatever. He asked me when and i said id get back to him. But needless to say i never did call him back after that stupid bs crap he pulled.

Sephex
07-11-2012, 02:58 PM
About two years ago i was talking to this one dude online and everything seemed alright till i met him..

So i met up with him and his buddy at the mall and we ended up going over to some bar in Indiana (im about 30 min from there), got wasted beyond belief. He was about 20 times worse than i was and he kept leaving me with his buddies and disappearing every so often for god knows how long.

So after that we ended up chilling at his other buddy's house and things got way out of hand at that point. Fist fights and everything else and im sitting on the sofa thinking to myself i need to get the hell out of here. After about 3 hrs of this i finally had enough and demaded they take me home. Sure enough him and his buddy were still at it on the ride home. Thank god i got home safely.

The dude had said this "Im sorry this is just how we are" and i said Right.. and he then had the nerve to ask me if he could stay the night and i said NO Sorry that's not a good idea. and then he said okie and that he would call me soon.

Not even a day later he called me and said he had a good time and wanted to hang out with me again. I said Sure/whatever. He asked me when and i said id get back to him. But needless to say i never did call him back after that stupid bs crap he pulled.

Man, you sure know how to pick 'em!

...

****!!

Miss Lady Shelly
07-11-2012, 05:36 PM
I also forgot to mention the dude and his friend thought they were Vegeta, and Goku while they were fighting... yeah.. lol

Jiro
07-11-2012, 05:47 PM
Well hey now, doesn't that make it perfectly acceptable? I mean if they were Goku and Vegeta then we better back off and give them space to settle this matter of Saiyan pride.

Sephex
07-11-2012, 05:48 PM
I also forgot to mention the dude and his friend thought they were Vegeta, and Goku while they were fighting... yeah.. lol

....

What. Just...What.

Miss Lady Shelly
07-11-2012, 05:52 PM
I also forgot to mention the dude and his friend thought they were Vegeta, and Goku while they were fighting... yeah.. lol

....

What. Just...What.


Well hey now, doesn't that make it perfectly acceptable? I mean if they were Goku and Vegeta then we better back off and give them space to settle this matter of Saiyan pride.


Lol I have no prob with Goku and Vegeta just kinda scared me that 31+ year olds acted like that.

Sephex
07-11-2012, 05:58 PM
I also forgot to mention the dude and his friend thought they were Vegeta, and Goku while they were fighting... yeah.. lol

....

What. Just...What.


Well hey now, doesn't that make it perfectly acceptable? I mean if they were Goku and Vegeta then we better back off and give them space to settle this matter of Saiyan pride.


Lol I have no prob with Goku and Vegeta just kinda scared me that 31+ year olds acted like that.

Did they actually call each other that? The story would be funnier of another friend called himself Cell and started to fight them both.

Miss Lady Shelly
07-11-2012, 06:03 PM
I also forgot to mention the dude and his friend thought they were Vegeta, and Goku while they were fighting... yeah.. lol

....

What. Just...What.


Well hey now, doesn't that make it perfectly acceptable? I mean if they were Goku and Vegeta then we better back off and give them space to settle this matter of Saiyan pride.


Lol I have no prob with Goku and Vegeta just kinda scared me that 31+ year olds acted like that.

Did they actually call each other that? The story would be funnier of another friend called himself Cell and started to fight them both.
They might have i dont remember.

Jiro
07-11-2012, 06:05 PM
As horrible an experience it was for you, I am so glad it happened because it makes the best story xD

Miss Lady Shelly
07-11-2012, 06:12 PM
As horrible an experience it was for you, I am so glad it happened because it makes the best story xD
I Look back at that situation now and realize its more entertaining so yeah im glad it entertained someone

DK
07-11-2012, 06:13 PM
What a pair of utter ponces. Goku and Vegeta, seriously? If you're that much of a fan, you should be calling each other Kakarot and Bejīta. :colbert:


...I'll see myself out. :hattip:

Jiro
07-11-2012, 06:18 PM
OYa5aQb3YGE

Trumpet Thief
07-11-2012, 06:42 PM
Quite recently, I was invited to a 'semi-date' with this girl that I had met through some volunteering event that both of us participated in. We met up at a local rec-centre (which is essentially the 'hub' of our town) and it was pretty cool for the first five minutes.

Afterwards, we walked around, at which point a third guy joined us. I had known this guy from highschool, and we had been pretty decent friends. Turns out, she invited both of us to a 'date' without letting us know that the other was coming. We talked about this whenever she wasn't looking, but otherwise, we just went along with it.

And initially, it was just awkward as hell, since we weren't sure what she was trying to do. Afterwards, we went to her house and she baked us cookies and we all talked. It was a very pleasant experience and I recommend it to all.

Jinx
07-11-2012, 06:43 PM
Quite recently, I was invited to a 'semi-date' with this girl that I had met through some volunteering event that both of us participated in. We met up at a local rec-centre (which is essentially the 'hub' of our town) and it was pretty cool for the first five minutes.

Afterwards, we walked around, at which point a third guy joined us. I had known this guy from highschool, and we had been pretty decent friends. Turns out, she invited both of us to a 'date' without letting us know that the other was coming. We talked about this whenever she wasn't looking, but otherwise, we just went along with it.

And initially, it was just awkward as hell, since we weren't sure what she was trying to do. Afterwards, we went to her house and she baked us cookies and we all talked. It was a very pleasant experience and I recommend it to all.

uh

Trumpet Thief
07-11-2012, 06:52 PM
Quite recently, I was invited to a 'semi-date' with this girl that I had met through some volunteering event that both of us participated in. We met up at a local rec-centre (which is essentially the 'hub' of our town) and it was pretty cool for the first five minutes.

Afterwards, we walked around, at which point a third guy joined us. I had known this guy from highschool, and we had been pretty decent friends. Turns out, she invited both of us to a 'date' without letting us know that the other was coming. We talked about this whenever she wasn't looking, but otherwise, we just went along with it.

And initially, it was just awkward as hell, since we weren't sure what she was trying to do. Afterwards, we went to her house and she baked us cookies and we all talked. It was a very pleasant experience and I recommend it to all.

uh

I didn't say that it was going to be a great story :p

And moreover, I doubt that one happy story will put a damper on this thread.

sharkythesharkdogg
07-11-2012, 09:13 PM
Quite recently, I was invited to a 'semi-date' with this girl that I had met through some volunteering event that both of us participated in. We met up at a local rec-centre (which is essentially the 'hub' of our town) and it was pretty cool for the first five minutes.

Afterwards, we walked around, at which point a third guy joined us. I had known this guy from highschool, and we had been pretty decent friends. Turns out, she invited both of us to a 'date' without letting us know that the other was coming. We talked about this whenever she wasn't looking, but otherwise, we just went along with it.

And initially, it was just awkward as hell, since we weren't sure what she was trying to do. Afterwards, we went to her house and she baked us cookies and we all talked. It was a very pleasant experience and I recommend it to all.

So many questions. Did she let you get to third base? Did she let him get to third base? Did he let you get to third base? Did the cookies get to third base? Did you put her in the "down hill skier" and go north/south?

With all the awkwardness, someone better have gotten some sweet action.

Shattered Dreamer
07-11-2012, 10:34 PM
Is "cookies" code for something else?

NorthernChaosGod
07-11-2012, 11:27 PM
Is "cookies" code for something else?

It was when I was 17.

Trumpet Thief
07-12-2012, 01:09 AM
Quite recently, I was invited to a 'semi-date' with this girl that I had met through some volunteering event that both of us participated in. We met up at a local rec-centre (which is essentially the 'hub' of our town) and it was pretty cool for the first five minutes.

Afterwards, we walked around, at which point a third guy joined us. I had known this guy from highschool, and we had been pretty decent friends. Turns out, she invited both of us to a 'date' without letting us know that the other was coming. We talked about this whenever she wasn't looking, but otherwise, we just went along with it.

And initially, it was just awkward as hell, since we weren't sure what she was trying to do. Afterwards, we went to her house and she baked us cookies and we all talked. It was a very pleasant experience and I recommend it to all.

So many questions. Did she let you get to third base? Did she let him get to third base? Did he let you get to third base? Did the cookies get to third base? Did you put her in the "down hill skier" and go north/south?

With all the awkwardness, someone better have gotten some sweet action.

To reply to the other posts first, no, cookies was not code for anything. She baked us chocolate chip cookies. :p

And no, I didn't get to third base. He didn't get to third base. The guy was ridiculously good looking, but I didn't get a chance to get to third base with him either.

Whenever she looked away, we would make jokes about that kind of stuff, but eventually, it ended up being a really fun hangout. I'm actually still friends with both of them, and I always laugh at that experience. Subverted expectations surprisingly aren't all that bad :)

But yes, we went over to her house and she spent an hour making some amazing cookies. Me and the 'other guy' took a bunch of them home after. Thumbs up for cookies?

Tigmafuzz
07-12-2012, 01:46 AM
Thumbs up for cookies?
Always :up:

Shattered Dreamer
07-12-2012, 02:00 AM
Is "cookies" code for something else?

It was when I was 17.

Do I want to know :lol:

NorthernChaosGod
07-12-2012, 08:03 AM
Is "cookies" code for something else?

It was when I was 17.

Do I want to know :lol:

It was code for sex. :p