EoFF OREGON TRAIL - ROUND 3 is ongoing...

[Pike]

Alright guys. It's the 1840s and we live in freaking Missouri and we don't want any of that anymore so we're going to OREGON TERRITORY.

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I need five brave souls to come with me as we jaunt across the continent. Who's ready?

[Shorty]

I am so down for this.

[Jessweeee♪]

Meeeeeeeee

[Rantz]

You have my swor-... well, you have my fist.

[Psychotic]

OH GOD PICK ME

[Pike]

Okay guys. We need ONE MORE PERSON. Who wants to join our hapless little band of pioneers?

[Sephex]

I'm in.

[Madame Adequate]

Oh :(

[Pike]

Okay guys I picked a sort of middle-of-the-road profession and skillset to keep things interesting but still possible

HERE WE GO

ARE YOU READY

OH GOD

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[Shorty]

OMG SO EXCITED <3


Okay guys. We need ONE MORE PERSON. Who wants to join our hapless little band of pioneers?

I read that as "hopeless," and became concerned.

LET'S DO THIS

[Rantz]

Oh man, I'm 12.

... Are we there yet?

[Psychotic]

45? Well jeez don't I just feel like a bloody kiddie fiddler. Still, I am pretty sure that was legal in 1840's America.

[Shorty]

You'd better not ask that the entire way. We've got three months ahead of us. :aimmad:

[Rantz]

45? Well jeez don't I just feel like a bloody kiddie fiddler. Still, I am pretty sure that was legal in 1840's America.

I'm bringing my fake moustache and pretending to be a dwarf.

[Del Murder]

I predict old man Psychotic will die of cholera about halfway through.

[Psychotic]

I predict old man Psychotic will die of cholera about halfway through.Speaking of 45 year olds... :colbert:

[Pike]

What do you guys think? Is she trying to SWINDLE US??

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[Shorty]

I predict old man Psychotic will die of cholera about halfway through.

We'll most likely end up having to trade him for our lives if we run into a band of Native Americans before that happens.

[Psychotic]

Which package would I like? Sephex's. :jokey:

[Shorty]

FIVE MONTHS?! It should only take three!

[Jessweeee♪]

Pike I want a mule can we have a mule?

[Del Murder]

Which package would I like? Sephex's. :jokey:
Did I say cholera? Make that syphilis.

[Shorty]

Now that I can see happening.

[Pike]

Sarah thinks we can do this nice and quick so we're going for the cheap package. :jokey:

Also we're getting a mule for Jessweeeeee:

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What else do you guys think we should bring??

[Jessweeee♪]

Yay :3

[Shorty]

Hey lady, that's how I roll. A cheap whore will do the same thing as an expensive one!

[Rantz]

No thanks to that package. I'm not even hungry.

Edit: BALE OF HAY

[Psychotic]

Actually screw Sephex (metaphorically) I want to sleep with that store clerk lady. Is there a nudie code for her? That square face and those broad, stocky shoulders... HOT TAMALE!

edit: We're gonna need LOTS of bridles. Bridles and hay.

[Pike]

I say we bring a bunch of brandy. What do you guys think?

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[Shorty]

Yes! And don't forget the bonnets!

[Del Murder]

Wow that's cheap brandy. And make sure you get beads for Sephex and Psychotic's um... 'alone time'.

[Rantz]

What is this brown muslin cloth? Is that what terrists wear on the head, ma?

[Psychotic]

What on earth for? Drinking is for losers. :roll2 I want some biscuits and some bonnets. Maybe some biscuits in a bonnet.

[Madame Adequate]

You should click that big INDEPENDENCE button and play the Northwest Independence War minigame. Spirit of '76!

[Pike]

Biscuits, bonnets and hay. Got it. Now what do we want to eat? :monocle:

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[Madame Adequate]

32 lbs of butter and one tin of sardines.

[Psychotic]

BACON 24/7 LIFESTYLE

[Del Murder]

5 cents for a pound of bacon? Why would you ever leave this place?

[Pike]

Okay!

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[Sephex]

Which package would I like? Sephex's. :jokey:
Did I say cholera? Make that syphilis.

Jokes on both of you, I have gonorrhea!

Also, I am 35? Only five years from my real life age.

*waits to see how I will die*

[Psychotic]

Never mind the syphillis... butter soaked bacon all day every day? Toot toot all aboard the heart disease train. But it'll be worth it. :jess:

[Pike]

Meanwhile Steve shows up and gives us advice

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[Sephex]

He's lying. I can tell by the way that hat is looking at his mustache.

[Psychotic]

"Pardon?"

Is there a way to perhaps undress this man because god damn if he doesn't have the snappiest outfit I have ever seen. I want it. All of it.

[Pike]

Hey guys did you know that you can buy 20 gallons of whiskey at the pharmacist's?

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[Madame Adequate]

Each bottle of sarsparilla costs $0.97, but a bottle cap is 1. Therefore we can make three cents profit for each one! For a total of 18 cents!

[Psychotic]

I'm gonna make my own homebrew out of sulphur, turpentine and quinine, and it'll be a lot better than stinky old Whiskey.
Each bottle of sarsparilla costs $0.97, but a bottle cap is 1. Therefore we can make three cents profit for each one! For a total of 18 cents!Well no because Pre-War Money comes out at like, 15 caps per dollar. And that's not even adjusting for inflation!

[Rantz]

Great, I'm going on a three month journey through hell with no TV and surrounded by drunk adults in bonnets. :( At least there'll be bacon.

[Pike]

Okay guys. We've got food, medicine, booze, bonnets, a mule, and...

OH BOY this is going to be the most important purchase we make before we start out!

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[Madame Adequate]

Well no because Pre-War Money comes out at like, 15 caps per dollar. And that's not even adjusting for inflation!

I'm obviously suggesting you buy now and sell in the post-nuclear later :colbert:

e; buy everything. That's 1700 lbs of gunpowder right there, just blow up the freaking Rockies.

[Psychotic]

Oh my god!!! Get a rifle, a shotgun, some sheaths, and as much ammo as we can make Sarah carry!

And fuck it let's get some gunpowder too. Not blowing things up every 5 minutes is simply Unamerican.

[Del Murder]

You will only need 6 bullets. Well, I guess one more for the mule.

[Shorty]

I'm not carrying anything. :colbert:

[Psychotic]

I'm not carrying anything. :colbert:Apart from the ebola virus. :doublecolbert:

[Shorty]

Better than syphilis!

[Madame Adequate]

Sarah I don't know if you're familiar with the symptoms of ebola but I can assure you that it is not in fact "better than syphilis".

[Pike]

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This is what happens when you guys refuse to carry stuff! Now look, we can't even leave!

[Shorty]

Sarah I don't know if you're familiar with the symptoms of ebola but I can assure you that it is not in fact "better than syphilis".

oh go to hell

EDIT: GUESS WE HAVE TO LEAVE PAUL BEHIND

[Madame Adequate]

No. You carry Paul.

Actually scratch that. Paul rides on the Mule, and hook Sarah up to tow the wagon.

[Psychotic]

Sarah I don't know if you're familiar with the symptoms of ebola but I can assure you that it is not in fact "better than syphilis".

oh go to hell

EDIT: GUESS WE HAVE TO LEAVE PAUL BEHINDIf it's a weight issue, p. sure your ass alone weighs twice as much as my entire body :goofy:

[Shorty]

You love my bootay, Paul, don't even deny it.

also I will not a part of your weird ponygirl fantasies, Huxtable!

[Pike]

I was going to buy more mules but they're expensive so I went for the cheaper oxen alternative and now they're letting us go

BUT NOW WHAT, I AM NOT GOOD AT DECISION!

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[Shorty]

The more people, the more likely we are to survive a Donner Party situation.

[Rantz]

Our morale is high. What could possibly go wrong!

[Madame Adequate]

also I will not a part of your weird ponygirl fantasies, Huxtable!

>she thinks the ponygirl having a choice is part of the fantasy :roll:

[Pike]

I like Sarah's logic so I went with the wagon train with the most people.

LOOK AT THIS GUYS, we are like two days into our journey and we've found a FROZEN RIVER! :eek:

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[Shorty]

There are children here, Huxley. Rantz, cover your ears.

SEE WHO'S AROUND

[Psychotic]

I didn't sign up for frozen rivers! :|

[Shorty]

What did you sign up for?

[Pike]

SEE WHO'S AROUND

This guy is just chilling by the ice! What a badass.

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[Shorty]

Oh man. He looks like a cannibal to me.

What does everyone else think? D:

[Psychotic]

I signed up for the bonnets, mostly.

Also let's talk to him! He looks like the kind of man who will give you a big hug and a mug of hot chocolate :3

[Pike]

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WAY TO BE A DEBBIE DOWNER, BRO.

[Shorty]

I do not see this turning out well in any choice we pick. :(

[Sephex]

Hey guys did you know that you can buy 20 gallons of whiskey at the pharmacist's?

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*Sephex has died of severe alcohol poisoning*

And that river is making me nervous...

[Shorty]

Okay, get rid of that slob and I say we rest/wait.

[Rantz]

Maybe if we just run across really fast... ?

[Pike]

Okay guys

Okay

Let's stay calm

And walk across the ice, okay?

[Shorty]

Following our fearless leader! (You go first, Pike.)

[Psychotic]

Yeah! I'm not gonna be beaten by no sissy ice! Let's do it! As long as Sarah's giant ass is last we'll be okay :)

[Madame Adequate]

OH HEY YOU FOUND ME

Do you like my mustache I grew it to look like a Turk

[Pike]

Hey look guys! We made it across the ice and as it turns out there's a town on the other side! :)

DOES ANYONE NEED TO USE THE BATHROOM? NOW WOULD BE A GOOD TIME BEFORE WE LEAVE CIVILIZATION.

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[Shorty]

I NEED TO USE THE BATHROOM also I'd like a pack of Skittles before we go anywhere

Paul, you're the first one we're feeding to the cannibals. I can't stand the sight of you :aimmad:

[Psychotic]

Let's conquer Westport and make it an annex of the Glorious Eyesonian Empire. PILLAGE, RAPE AND MURDER!

[Pike]

Buying Sarah some Skittles before we continue!

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[Shorty]

Wait what I don't need three pounds D:

[Psychotic]

Wait what I don't need three pounds D:I'll say... :erm:

[Rantz]

I don't need to pee, promise! O=)

[Pike]

OH SHIT

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[Shorty]

Get Paul off that wagon.

[Rantz]

Wait wait okay

We can double-team the animals!? Paul, let's you and me go first!

[Pike]

Get Paul off that wagon.

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[Shorty]

WHAT

Get advice, then :(

[Madame Adequate]

"Take Sarah's fat ass off the wagon."

[Shorty]

I knew I should have never shared that picture :aimmad:

[Pike]

I asked for advice and the guy was like "THIS IS YOUR FAULT WE'RE GOING TOO FAST HURR HURR"

So I threw him off the wagon :shobon:

But then a few days later this happened :(

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[Shorty]

Do we have supplies to replace it?

[Psychotic]

Let's trade that candy for a replacement.

[Madame Adequate]

I knew I should have never shared that picture :aimmad:

Well if you want me to forget about that picture you know there's another sort of picture you could provide :jokey:


I asked for advice and the guy was like "THIS IS YOUR FAULT WE'RE GOING TOO FAST HURR HURR"

So I threw him off the wagon :shobon:

But then a few days later this happened :(

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THANKS SARAH

[Pike]

"You were unable to repair the wagon axle and had to replace it from supplies."

http://01.images.fireden.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/okay.jpg

[Psychotic]

Well if you want me to forget about that picture you know there's another sort of picture you could provide :jokey:You still not seen them yet? Bloody hell mate. I'll hook you up on MSN.

[Shorty]

FINE IT'S ALL ME AND MY ASS'S FAULT

I'm not ashamed :colbert:

dammit, Paul. I was going to use that as incentive for something down the line but you've BOTCHED THAT, THANK YOU.

[Pike]

OH GOD WHAT DID YOU GUYS DO

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[Shorty]

PUT IT OUT PUT IT OUT

[Del Murder]

Jesus, all this and you can still see your old house from here.

[Psychotic]

PUT THE FIRE OUT JESUS CHRIST

[G13]

I knew I should have never shared that picture :aimmad:

*comes out of hiding*

Whoa, whoa, what? There's a picture of Sarah's ass somewhere around here?

[Pike]

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Man you guys I dunno we're barely 50 miles out of town

[Shorty]

THANK GOD THE CANDY IS OKAY

No, Eric. There is not.

[Psychotic]

RIP bacon :whimper:

[Del Murder]

I knew I should have never shared that picture :aimmad:

*comes out of hiding*

Whoa, whoa, what? There's a picture of Sarah's ass somewhere around here?
And now we know what search terms G was using to find this thread.

[Shorty]

I'm sure it's just a little crispy. The bacon is fine!

[Psychotic]

I knew I should have never shared that picture :aimmad:

*comes out of hiding*

Whoa, whoa, what? There's a picture of Sarah's ass somewhere around here?
And now we know what search terms G was using to find this thread.BONNETS!

[Sephex]

>goes off to work in real life
>come back to this

MY BACON AND BOOZE!!! There goes my plan to make bacon flavored booze.

[Pike]

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"This river may prove a little tricky."

http://myfacewhen.com/images/177.jpg

[Rantz]

Super crispy bacon, you guys!

Guess that's what happens when you use those "match" thingies...

[Sephex]

Let's just take the ferry. Our luck seems to be going down the drain awfully fast.

[Shorty]

I knew this should be an "adults only" escapade. Rantz, you're going in the river.

[Pike]

Let's just take the ferry. Our luck seems to be going down the drain awfully fast.

Good idea. For all that money they have to know what they're doing, right? This will just be a nice safe journey helped along by professionals and a;lsgkh;LHKASGKADAKLYHAAGDSKLABLRGRLRLGRL

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[Shorty]

I wasn't sitting on that side of the wagon. I swear.

[Sephex]

Let's just take the ferry. Our luck seems to be going down the drain awfully fast.

Good idea. For all that money they have to know what they're doing, right? This will just be a nice safe journey helped along by professionals and a;lsgkh;LHKASGKADAKLYHAAGDSKLABLRGRLRLGRL

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I just laughed so damn loud at work. I am lucky I am on break.

[Rantz]

I wanna go back home and hide under the shop clerk's skirts :(

[Pike]

Let's look on the bright side, NOBODY DIED!

[Freya]

THE BACON! WTH NOT THE BACON! You guys suck at this. It's no wonder, half of you aren't even american :colbert:

[Psychotic]

THE BACON! WTH NOT THE BACON! You guys suck at this. It's no wonder, half of you aren't even american :colbert:The non fat half. Just sayin'.

[Rantz]

Hey, at least the weather is nice.

[Sephex]

Let's look on the bright side, NOBODY DIED!

At this point, I am waiting for a random lighting strike to take us all out in one instant.

But the remaining bacon shall make it to Oregon.

[Shorty]

THE BACON! WTH NOT THE BACON! You guys suck at this. It's no wonder, half of you aren't even american :colbert:The non fat half. Just sayin'.

SHUT UP I AM SHAPELY

Yay, no deaths so far!

[Pike]

Well I'm not sure how we managed it but we went a few days without incident. And oooh, what's this? Hey look maybe they'll help us out!

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[Shorty]

OH MY GOD CANNIBALS

[Sephex]

itsatrap.jpg

[Rantz]

Approach them! They look like friendly shadows. :)

[Shorty]

You mean with the looks of the guns they're holding?

[Psychotic]

2 days before my birthday :)

Let's go approach them, I bet they have yummy candy we can eat.

[Del Murder]

I bet it's zombies.

[Pike]

Approach them! They look like friendly shadows. :)

THEY SENT OUT THEIR MEDIATOR TO TALK TO US

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She's got some sort of dodgy Russian/Scottish hybrid accent. I think it's a trap.

[Sephex]

Sure, let's help foa.

[Shorty]

We gotta offer them something or they'll tear us limb from limb!

[Psychotic]

Offer something.

Namely my penis :smug:

And also bullets. To the skull.

(The order in which we make these offers does not matter to me)

[Madame Adequate]

KILL THEM AND TAKE THEIR SUPPLIES

If they have no supplies, THEY BECOME THE SUPPLIES

You can make food from their flesh and leather from their skin.

[Pike]

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They're demanding guns. That's it, we're out of here.

[Shorty]

So... we're the reavers here?

Ffff do we have any other rifles? I'm getting antsy about this!

EDIT: Oh, we have two. What if one jams, though!?

[Psychotic]

Give her a rifle butt to the teeth.

[Sephex]

Haggle anyway.

[Jessweeee♪]

NO SHE WILL SHOOT US WITH IT AND TAKE OUR OXEN AND MULE :(

[Rantz]

Should've just kept saying "Pardon?" until they got sick of us and left.

[Pike]

I tried to haggle but they just wanted more guns, so we made an escape. Just in time if you ask me!

Anyways. I'm no expert on Nebraska but I'm pretty sure it doesn't have a coast. Are we sure we're going the right way? :onoes:

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[Jessweeee♪]

Let's rest here for a week.

[Rantz]

It's a swamp!

Edit: Man, our morale is still high after all this crap!

[Shorty]

I don't... coast? What?

I say we rest also~

[Sephex]

Might as well rest. Gotta go pee in the bushes.

[Pike]

Okay! Rested a bit. Ready to continue onward now, but...

OH NOES!

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[Psychotic]

Resting is for sissies. Gotta keep up the pace! Gotta break 4:42!

Edit: What would Gerald Ford do?

[Jessweeee♪]

FORD IT

ALWAYS FORD IT

[Sephex]

Have we driven a Ford lately?

[Pike]

AUGH NOW LOOK WHAT YOU GUYS DID

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That was some strenuous river-fording. (Is that what the kids call it these days? :roll2 )

[Psychotic]

The joke is just too obvious. Immobilize it!

[Sephex]

http://i3.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/088/113/plan2jh7.jpg

Just kidding. Immobilize the joint.

[Madame Adequate]

My granny Sadie suggests epsom for absolutely everything so I recommend taking that option.

Also give Jessweeeeee a break, Sephex. Sarah can do that for you for awhile.

[Jinx]

APPLY ALCOHOL TO THE SPRAIN

ALCOHOL ALWAYS MAKES THINGS BETTER

[Jessweeee♪]

Ouch! My parkour was too hardcore :(

[Madame Adequate]

NO DON'T WASTE PRECIOUS ALCOHOL

Apply bacon to the sprain.

[Sephex]

My granny Sadie suggests epsom for absolutely everything so I recommend taking that option.

Also give Jessweeeeee a break, Sephex. Sarah can do that for you for awhile.

She suffered a sprain. Breaking it would make it worse, you monster!

[Psychotic]

Amputate it.

[Pike]

The joint has been immobilized and bacon has been applied. ONWARD! FOR VICTORY!

[Pike]

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"This river appears extremely treacherous."

http://i10.photobucket.com/albums/a109/Pikestaff/BannedGeneral/1336174694744.jpg

[Jinx]

FORD IT

[Psychotic]

Wait for a bit. Have a nice cook out on the river bank.

[Jessweeee♪]

FORD

IT

But first we can see who's around.

[Pike]

The river has been forded and upon crossing the wagon promptly fell over three times in a row.

[Shorty]

Did we lose anything?!

[Sephex]

I think we can afford to...well, you know.

Also, work is just about over for me. Won't be able to keep up with this for awhile.

If we make it, I take all the credit, even if I die!

If we lose, the fault lies with everyone else!

[Rantz]

I think floating for a bit on this extremely treacherous river sounds like a fun idea.

[Pike]

Did we lose anything?!

We did, we lost a variety of random items. But that's the LEAST of our concerns right now, because:

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:onoes:

[Jessweeee♪]

o:

Get advice!

I love how me and Rantzien are both the same little boy.

[Shorty]

Oh no! Load him up with vinegar! He likes that.

[Jinx]

Give him vinegar.

EDIT: Yeeeeeeeeeeah, Sarah. :D

[Jessweeee♪]

You fools we don't have vinegar we used it all on my wrist!

[Psychotic]

Increase fluid intake. I'm happy to provide the extra fluids. :smug:

[Jinx]

You fools we don't have vinegar we used it all on my wrist!

We used bacon on your wrist!

[Pike]

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Meanwhile, some advice from the Marlboro Man.

[Shorty]

Fluids, then. But take him over in those bushes - I don't want to watch that.

[Rantz]

I NEED WHISKEY

I mean we got it from the pharmacist, didn't we :(

[Psychotic]

Dude it's Tallahassee.

[Del Murder]

Nice shirt. I didn't know they had Old Navy back in those days.

[Pike]

Fluid intake: increased. Old Navy shirt: Stolen.

We're on our way again!

[Pike]

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$4 for the ferry but REMEMBER WHAT HAPPENED LAST TIME? I wouldn't trust these guys trying to get out of a paper bag.

[Shorty]

Yeah, no. "Professionals."

What if we caulk the wagons and float?

[Psychotic]

I know I'll be outvoted but whatever: Caulk dat shit up.

[Del Murder]

Yeah, ride that caulk.

[Jinx]

IS DAK THERE?

[Pike]

We have ridden the caulk to glory :aimkiss:

[Shorty]

Awesome, way to go, team!

[Jinx]

We have ridden the caulk to glory :aimkiss:

Yeah she did.

[Agent Proto]

IS DAK THERE?

No. He, along with the other dirty criminals are getting deported to Australia.

[Del Murder]

IS DAK THERE?
It's Oregon Trail not Outback Walkabout.

[Pike]

OH NO JESSWEEE'S MULE! D:

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[Psychotic]

+Fine Mule Leather Leggings+ imho

[Shorty]

What, no option to shoot it in the head?

[Rantz]

EAT IT

[Shorty]

You're still woozy from the vinegar. Go lay down!

[Psychotic]

What, no option to shoot it in the head?Waste of ammo. We need every bullet we can get to threaten the natives.

[Shorty]

Perhaps suspiciously, we haven't run into any of them yet. Do you think they're following us?

EDIT: rest a while and see if the mule heals :(

[Jessweeee♪]

Nooooo c'mon can't we let poor Muley rest for a bit :(

[Agent Proto]

If I were going along for the ride, I'd suggest abandon Jessweeee behind with her mule to care for it while everyone goes ahead. However, I'm not so it's all up to you guys to decide what to do with the mule.

[Pike]

Resting a bit for the mule :)

[Pike]

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YES LET'S REST IN THE MIDDLE OF THE MOSQUITO NEST

THAT'S CLEARLY A GOOD PLAN

[Jessweeee♪]

Let's get advice.

[Madame Adequate]

"BAD MOSQUITOS"

So what, do they like... not suck blood very well or something?

[Pike]

Let's get advice.

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"These mosquitos are terrible, let's just stay where they are!"

[Psychotic]

Blimey, she has a face like a smacked arse.

[Pike]

Alright guys, so we left those mosquitos behind. The rivers are popping up like daisies, though.

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[Psychotic]

It worked once, it'll work again! CAULK MY BITCH UP!

[Pike]

It worked once, it'll work again! CAULK MY BITCH UP!

Brilliant idea!

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Oh.

[Sephex]

Back just for a bit before I am headed out.

Caulk the thing up. Use Psychotics cock for the extra big holes. :love:

EDIT: Should have used your dick like I said, Psy.

[Agent Proto]

By the time this is over, I'm expecting Pike to be the sole survivor.

[Shorty]

This river business is no good.

[Pike]

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"Mormon Ferry Trading Post"? Oh yeah it's time for Shorty and I to get in on some hot multiple wives action :jokey:

[Psychotic]

:sebastian:: Darling it's better down where it's wetter, take it from me!

I see no reason to refute Sebastian the Crab. :colbert:

[Madame Adequate]

YES

MORMANITY IS BEST HUMANITY

Shorty x Pike x MILF OTP :aimkiss:luvluv

[Shorty]

Hey, we'll take one for the team, right Pike? :jokey:

[Psychotic]

isn't a Moron like a really stupid person? Trading with them sounds like a great idea. We can sell them a couple of beads for $200! Or half their land, if you want to go Native American on their asses.

[Jessweeee♪]

Let's see who's around o:

[Madame Adequate]

Hey, we'll take one for the team, right Pike? :jokey:

Pike will do absolutely anything if you offer her a sexy watch.

[Shorty]

* Joseph Smith pops out of the shack.

[Rantz]

Let's trade Shorty and Pike for a few new mules.

[Madame Adequate]

Let's trade Shorty and Pike for a few new mules.

Why would you want to trade mules for mules? :confused:

[Pike]

Guys I'm gonna go hunting while everyone else has fun back at the Mormon Love Shack.

See this bear? I'm gonna shoot it.

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[Agent Proto]

Pike, I'll trade you my watch for 2 of your finest oxen.

[Rantz]

It's not a bear it's a MAMMOTH FROM VERY FAR AWAY

WATCH OUT FOR GIANTS

[Pike]

BAHAHAHA NOW WHAT BEAR

[Shorty]

Let's trade Shorty and Pike for a few new mules.

I thought you loved me. :(

[Pike]

Okay we've had enough polygamy for one day. Let us continue. :monster:

[Pike]

Oh boy, another one of these. Whose turn is it to decide what we do?

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[Jessweeee♪]

FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORRRRD

[Shorty]

Why don't we CHECK RIVER CONDITIONS since we haven't done that yet

[Pike]

FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORRRRD

Uh

uh guys

It's getting kinda wet in here

36367

[Shorty]

GODDAMN IT

No more fording! Didn't even manage to stay dry from the last time!

[Psychotic]

We got no troubles, life is the bubbles...

[Pike]

Well we had no injuries at least...

But oh, wait, what's this?

OH WOW

GUYS THIS IS IT

This is the river we've been preparing for this whole time

This sucker is NINE FEET DEEP.

36368

[Shorty]

SEE IF THERE ARE SOME NATIVES AROUND TO WORK THEIR RIVER MAGIC

[Psychotic]

CAUUUUUUUUUUUULK!

[Shorty]

oh my god we're going to die

[Rantz]

Ahahahaha

The way I see it, why should we learn from our mistakes? Our luck has got to turn at some point, right?

[Shorty]

Our luck is going to turn upside down and we'll be belly-up in that river.

[Psychotic]

Up on the shore they work all day, out in the sun they slave away! While we devotin' full time to floatin' under the sea~~~~~~~

[Pike]

SEE IF THERE ARE SOME NATIVES AROUND TO WORK THEIR RIVER MAGIC

There's just a couple of Amish chicks who are like "Yeah I dunno what to do either LOL"

It's just up to us!

[Shorty]

goddamn it.

Caulk it, I guess.

WE HAD A GOOD RUN, GUYS

[Rantz]

Well what have we been training for if not this sucker. CAULK IT UP

[Psychotic]

I'll never let go Jack Bacon. :whimper: