View Full Version : Giant Cockroaches

Big Ogre Umaro
02-14-2002, 01:58 AM
Okay, let's pretend that you're a giant cockroach. If you found another giant cockroach that was a different color, like red or purple, would you fight it just for that reason? Or would you wait until you found something that you didn't like about that differently-colored giant cockroach, and fight it for that? Perhaps you would try to make friends with this giant cockroach just because it was a different color than you were?

What if this other giant cockroach that you met had a gun? How would you feel about that? Would you laugh because giant cockroaches don't have thumbs, and are therefore completely useless as marksmen? Or would you be afraid that this particular giant cockroach had found some secret cockroach way of firing a gun with any amount of accuracy? If the other giant cockroach was a different color than you, like red or purple, would that increase your fear that it could use the gun on you?

Most importantly of all, would you try to eat yourself if you were a giant cockroach, just to see if you tasted good?

Citizen Bleys
02-14-2002, 02:00 AM
BOU, WHAT are you smoking?

02-14-2002, 02:08 AM
Man, Bleys, you said almost the same thing when I went on about demon baby fingurs *shakes head*

I'd try and make friends with the different colored giant cockroach. Then we'd go back to my place an--*gets killed by a gaint cockroach ninja dude*

Big Ogre Umaro
02-14-2002, 02:09 AM
Bleys, I will kindly thank you not to spam up my thread. >=|

To stay ON topic, I think that I wouldn't eat myself if I were a giant cockroach, but you never know. I might like the taste of cockroach if I were one. Maybe I'd be a weird cockroach cannibal-type.

02-14-2002, 02:16 AM
<font color=#FFCCFF>I can't say I have thought about being a cockroach before...but one thing's for sure, I would NOT eat myself xD If I was curious to see what cockroaches taste like, I'd go and chew on another cockroach :tongue:

Citizen Bleys
02-14-2002, 02:18 AM
Originally posted by Big Ogre Umaro
Bleys, I will kindly thank you not to spam up my thread. >=|

You shouldn't thank somebody until they actually DO it.

In retrospect, it was probably not a good idea to eat a sticky bun while wearing a 3-piece suit.

Sakura Yume
02-14-2002, 02:18 AM
I'd... run away. Cos I'd be the lil one most like and I'd get eaten by the other one... I would not choose to be a cannibal cockroach. Also: COAKROACHES ARE GROSS!!!!!!! I'm done now.

02-14-2002, 02:21 AM
Oh, I have a question, In the decision that I, a giant colored cockroach, were to eat myself, would I get to choose a topping of my choise to be spread about my body before taking the first bite? If so, then I choose chocolate.

02-14-2002, 02:22 AM
this thread seems to sound as if it's about racism but i'm probably just taking it too seriously and it's actually about roaches
anyway, i would fight once i find a reason, i would laugh at it with a gun because cockroaches aren't smart, and no, i would eat myself

02-14-2002, 02:24 AM
<font color=#CC33FF>I would try and make friends with the coloured cockroach. I think they would be cool.

I wouldn't eat myself though.......:tongue:

02-14-2002, 02:26 AM
<font color="00B72E" face="Verdana" size="1">I think BOU got lost. *moves this thread to ASC* Wait.. damn.

Sure, I'd eat myself, why not?

02-14-2002, 02:28 AM
I wouldn't fight another cockroach for no reason, even if it was abnormally colored. However, if there was a limited amount of food available, competition would be necessary for survival.

Big Ogre Umaro
02-14-2002, 02:36 AM
This thread is JUST about cockroaches. Anyone talking about racism should be SHOT.

Anyway, I also think that it is highly improbable for a cockroach to be able to fire a gun, but you never know. Can't be too careful.

And to Kalen: I suppose that you could spread yourself with any toping that you want. It would be at the extra expense of the toping, though, since obviously no one's going to give free chocolate to a giant cockroach.

02-14-2002, 02:48 AM
How do you know no one would give me free chocolate? Maybe I find a small child with a big heart that loves me, and we run and play together. We have fun and a heart warming movie is made about us and I become a holly wood giant colored cockroach and spend the rest of my life playing the amusing pet in a family TV show. Till finally I get my hands on some chocolate and eat myself! Mwahahah!

Big Ogre Umaro
02-14-2002, 03:08 AM
I highly doubt that would happen, but if you can get it to work for you, then please do.

02-14-2002, 03:24 AM
i mentioned racism cause you're talking about cockroaches and fighting another colored one for no reason, so, fuck, it just seems like if you actually payed attention, it seems like it could be about racism

02-14-2002, 03:30 AM
I would hide from the cockroach, especially if it had a gun. But that's only if it were red or purple. If it were green or blue, that would be a TOTALLY different story. We'd be teh most bestest friends evaire in teh whole wide world... or something. But if it were brown, I'd shoot it with the aforementioned cockroach gun, then spread chocolate on it and eat it, because the chocolate matches it. =P Any other color, I'd just ignore. I know none of that probably made sense, but neither does a thread about giant cockroaches in the first place. =P

Melted Snowman
02-14-2002, 04:39 AM
I'm a giant cockroach; not even atomic bombs can touch me, baby. I have nothing to fear from some pansy wanna-be in a kiddie suit. For all I know this different coloured cockroach is some guy trying to film a documentary on me. It is therefore my duty to rip his face off.

If he had a gun I'd let him shoot me. Cockroaches am own.

02-14-2002, 04:53 AM
I'd eat the other cockroach, then all the other cockroaches, then everything, and become a super giant cockroach, and have my large cockroach body plated in gold, then eat myself, gold and all. Why? Don't ask me, its just the script. *High fives his script writer*

02-14-2002, 05:18 AM
Hhhmm, a giant cockroach. I'd survive a nuclear holocaust. Cool! If I saw a giant cockroach with a different color, I'd probably eat him and see if I can get his color. :D If he had a gun, I'd try to get it from him. :D

02-14-2002, 05:39 AM
<font color="cc99ff">I do not want to eat myself. o_0

Big Ogre Umaro
02-14-2002, 05:46 AM
Would a giant cockroach really survive a nuclear holocaust? I know a regular sized one might, but a giant cockroach would surely get crushed by some type of falling rock. Don't you think?

Relena Peacecraft
02-14-2002, 06:09 AM
Do you mean to tell me that all this time I haven't actually been a giant cockroach? Darn. *shrugs* Guess you learn something new every day.

Anyway, I suppose if I were a cockroach, which I'm apparently not (Thanks for shattering my dreams of glory, BOU), and I found a different colored cockroach, I probably wouldn't care, because cockroaches just have their little cockroach brains. Except, because they're giant cockroaches, they'd have larger cockroach brains. But it would probably still be much smaller than a human brain. It's a brain mass to body mass ratio type thing.

Err, yeah. Giant cockroaches can survive anything, including being crushed by a rock, because they are just that ace. Well, not really.

02-14-2002, 06:20 AM
I used to have a pet hissing cockroach. It was pretty big, and AWESOME! But it ran away.....I need another one. I'll name it Princess. :D

02-14-2002, 06:23 AM
<Font color="pink">Er...yes. I'd run away and then jump in some bug spray or something ;) No..... don't wanna be cochroach...plz! :D But maybe I'd taste myself first....maybe not =x The mere prospect of eating cochroach is icky to moi ;) *falls* ....Unless I was covered in cheesecake....or maybe if I were a cheesecake-cochroach :D

What if I saw a yellow cochroach and it was actually made of cheesecake? But wait! Cheesecake doesn't have to be yellow - I can see or be a brown cochroach or whatnot, and they/me can be made out of cheesecake, too. If I were a cheesecake cochroach, I would eat myself. But if I saw another cheesecake cochroach, I would eat them. But wait! What if we were both cheesecake cochroaches? Who would eat the other first? Or maybe the other cochroach doesn't like cheesecake 0_o What would happen then? Would the idea of being a cheesecake cochroach make him sick? Would he still fight for his life when I try to eat him, or would he just want his life to end since he's so disgusted with being a cheesecake cochroach. Would I eat myself or be willing to fight for the other cheesecake cochroach first, if we were both cheesecake cochroaches? Or what if he DID like cheesecake? Would I win, or would he win? Are cochroaches classified as hes and shes? Would I be able to tell, I mean, if I were a cochroach and all? If I were a boy cochroach, would it be ethical to eat and beat up this girl cochroach? How would I know if I were a boy cochroach or a girl cochroach? How wouldn't I know? What if girl cheesecake cochroaches tasted better than guy ones? Would that be a disadvantage I'd possess? Or maybe the guy ones turn out tasting better than the girls, would I be lucky? What if they did and I was a girl cochroach? Or better yet, what if I were the better tasting one - would the other cochroach ever know? Would he/she even realize the concept of another cochroach tasting better?

Or maybe I'd see a red or blue cheesecake cochroach! Dude! Are there such things are red or blue cheesecake? There could be, couldn't there, since there's brown and yellow and various other colours. I mean, they can practically dye cheesecake any colour, right? ;) Anyway, I've never tasted a red or blue cheesecake before. Would those taste better than regular cheesecake?

Oh! I had a thought. What if cochroaches DO actually taste like cheesecake? And suppose I'm a human; just suppose. If I'm so repulsed by the idea of tasting a cochroach, would I ever know? What if they don't taste like cheesecake and I try it? Or worse yet, what if they taste like squash? Would my curiousity overcome my repulsion against the idea of tasting a cochroach?

What if I'm tired right now and want to go to sleep? I think I should. And what if I spelled cochroach wrong throughout this whole thing and is still spelling it wrong? Hmmm.... *done* (scary thing is, all this popped out from the top of my head...I didn't even need to think ;) I *can* act like Mil when I want to! XD mwahahah!)

02-14-2002, 06:28 AM
I love you, Joyee...

02-14-2002, 06:32 AM
<font color="pink">Of courshe, wifey ^.- But think about it this way: If you were a cheesecake cochroach, and I were say, a cheesecake or chocolate cochroach, would you still love me, or would you fight me to the death and try to eat me? What if I were the girl cochroach and you were the guy one? Or maybe if I were a PURPLE cochroach. Would that symbolize I'm cochroach royalty? Would it not? Would you attack a royal cochroach? What if- *stops* ;)


02-14-2002, 06:35 AM
Being a racist Cockroach??? hmmm No....although I would eat it if I were hungry. Mmm....Giant Cockroach.. *fries and eats himself*

02-14-2002, 06:52 AM
Of course I would still love you, Joyee, but I would also try to eat you. >=D How could I NOT eat a cheesecake cockroach?

02-14-2002, 08:17 AM
What are the names of these cockroach?

02-14-2002, 03:54 PM
Uhh... eww, just eww *tries not to draw connentations from all the people saying they'd eat themselves and the fact that none of them can spell COCKroach correctly*

If Freud was here, he'd be having a field day... "Vat is going on here? All zese people eating each other? Zeir innability to say the vord 'COCKroach' correctly? Zey are all showing extreme signs of crazyness!" *runs away and does deviant things to a sheep*

You see, the horrifying truth is the shrink needed a shrink coz' the shrink's brain had shrunken, thus shrinking his skunk who slunk around shrinks in need of shrinking like slugs...

No, no, no, and, I'd laugh, yes, no, no, NO

02-14-2002, 11:16 PM
Originally posted by Spatvark
Uhh... eww, just eww *tries not to draw connentations from all the people saying they'd eat themselves and the fact that none of them can spell COCKroach correctly*

<font color="pink">Actually, if I recall correctly, I'm the only one that spelled COCHROACH the ace way ^_^ I mean, think about it? Cock Roach? 0_o Puh-leeze. Doesn't cochroach just LOOK so much acer in itself? ;) Anyway, that's not the point XD The point is, please stop making generalizations :D I was the only one that spelled COCHROACH differently, which er...makes me a unique person! :D Yah! Btw, wtmajigee are connentations? ;) I thought it might have been just a word I didn't know, but it's not in the dictionary either XD *goes off on a tirade ranting about cochroaches* :p

02-14-2002, 11:59 PM
<font color="ff6600" size=1> Uhh... I doubt I'd fight it for no reason. *devours his own leg*</font>

02-15-2002, 12:17 AM
Cochroaches are cool.

I'd eat teh other guy if he was pissing me off or stealing my pieces of dead rat.

02-15-2002, 12:27 AM
Hmmm what are you eating??? Magic mushrooms?? ^_^ I have to admit that this is one of the most weirdest thred I've ever seen.... Anyway. I wouldn't eat my self... I would make roach army to take over the Earth.... And yes I'm in your worst nightmare

BTW Jojo raches are not cheesecakes and they do not taste like it. (I haven't eaten it. But there was a guy who worked at a zoo and he tasted it and he didn't like it..... BTW I think there's some guy who has guinness record for eating whole bunch of roaches in a minuite or something.... Urk....)

02-15-2002, 01:02 AM
Well, how do you know he wasn't lying? Or maybe, he doesn't liek cheesecake? >=0

Melted Snowman
02-15-2002, 02:01 AM
BOU misled me and I didn't think to double-check his spelling.

That's my story.

02-15-2002, 02:28 AM

yeah. that's what i'd do.

ps - DON'T mess with cheesecake...or Mamushka will get you!


(damn australian franchise...*will look for the great honourable nz one later...except now she has to go work there yay?*

02-15-2002, 06:53 AM
Originally posted by Yoshi
BTW I think there's some guy who has guinness record for eating whole bunch of roaches in a minuite or something.... Urk....)

Poor roaches!! :(:(:(

02-15-2002, 11:12 AM
Originally posted by Kalenisis

Poor roaches!! :(:(:(

Yeah I what kind of sick mind would come up wih the udea. "Hey I can make a guinness record by eating a bunch of roaches within a minuite. And nobody will beat me since it's so disgusting" Urk times 3.

And yes I'm in your worst nightmare

02-15-2002, 12:07 PM
I would be mates with the other cockroach, so we can go and annoy people in pairs. It's more fun in pairs.

02-15-2002, 04:05 PM
I'd write a book on the experience, using only the eyelids that I don't have and an interpretor who is 100% not efficient in non-eyelid reading.