The Cunning Cap party

[Slothy]

Do you own a cunning cap, handsome hat, spectacular stetson, dapper derby, fancy fedora or timeless toque? Then this is the party for you. We're going to bring some style back to EoFF in the form of delightful headwear.

Frankly, this site has been lacking in class for far too long and this needs to change. Scientists have long suspected that one is not a true gentleman without a fine piece of clothing adorning their head. But only recently were they able to prove it as the pie chart below demonstrates:
http://i.imgflip.com/1iws7.png (http://imgflip.com/i/1iws7)
And we all know that if it's in a pie chart it must be true.

But not only does a fine hat up your classiness level, they frequently come with bonuses to intelligence as well. So let's put on our thinking hats and make this site the sort of place a gentleman can be proud to call home. Let's take it back from those hapless masses walking around with a chill in their scalp and bad hair days!

For the people! For EoFF! For fine hats everywhere!

Members List:
Vivi22
Calliope
chionos (I assume anyone who makes a spreadsheet is in)
Jowy
Sephex
sharkythesharkdogg
Aulayna
Nicolas
edczxcvbnm
Quina

Things We Need To Do Before 22nd May
-Create your party name.
-Decide on a non-representative party member to be your vice president.
-Decide on your motto.
-Decide on your slogan (yes, they are different)
-Decide on a mascot.
-Draw a sigil/crest for your party.

[Calliope]

43222

Dude, I own so many hats. I'm even responsible for Unne's correction of the :hat: smiley.

:hat: :hat: :hat: :hat: :hat:

[Slothy]

Then I think you know the party you need to join. :D

[Del Murder]

I appreciate somebody creating a party for all the bald members out there. However, as a person with a perfect head of hair, what can you offer me?

[Slothy]

Even with a perfect head of hair, everyone looks better in a hat. It's the mark of a true gentleman.

You do want to be a gentleman don't you?

[Del Murder]

Sometimes.

[Calliope]

I appreciate somebody creating a party for all the bald members out there. However, as a person with a perfect head of hair, what can you offer me?

Perhaps something to cover that big head of yours, dear.

[Goldenboko]

I am interested in this party but I question it's relevancy to modern day ideals.

[Aulayna]

I could potentially be interested in this party if it's competitiveness and potential superiority to the Newbie Party was illustrated comparatively to me in Excel spreadsheet format.

[Loony BoB]

http://i.imgflip.com/1iws7.png (http://imgflip.com/i/1iws7)
And we all know that if it's in a pie chart it must be true.
As the only person to be 100% of this pie chart, I'd like to say thanks for this massive compliment.

[Calliope]

I could potentially be interested in this party if it's competitiveness and potential superiority to the Newbie Party was illustrated comparatively to me in Excel spreadsheet format.

43227

[Slothy]

Just in case Calliope's lovely spreadsheet isn't enough for you Aulayna, here are some facts:
- Hats have been shown to increase gentlemanliness by upwards of 700%.
- Not joining the Newbie Party has been scientifically proven to add at least one decade to your lifespan.

Now I don't know about you, but when I punch those numbers into my calculator I get a happy face.


I am interested in this party but I question it's relevancy to modern day ideals.

What could be more modern or ideal than a headcrab hat? The hat of the day for today also happens to be a headcrab hat.

http://i39.photobucket.com/albums/e161/Vivi2372/IMAG0224_zpse0957b07.jpg (http://s39.photobucket.com/user/Vivi2372/media/IMAG0224_zpse0957b07.jpg.html)

[chionos]

43228

43229

Notice also that the relative awesomeness of The Cunning part creates a nice little hat. It's a sign from the gods.

[Psychotic]

What could be more modern or ideal than a headcrab hat? The hat of the day for today also happens to be a headcrab hat.

http://i39.photobucket.com/albums/e161/Vivi2372/IMAG0224_zpse0957b07.jpg (http://s39.photobucket.com/user/Vivi2372/media/IMAG0224_zpse0957b07.jpg.html)Hmm. On one hand, Headcrab Hat. Do we go to Ravenholm? On the other hand, incredible neckbeard ahoy.

[Slothy]

Hmm. On one hand, Headcrab Hat. Do we go to Ravenholm? On the other hand, incredible neckbeard ahoy.

Some people don't go to Ravenholm anymore, but those people are hatless. Gentlemen need not fear so we go on strolls through town all the time.

Also, once my Jayne Cobb hat arrives that neckbeard is getting shaved into a goatee if that sways your opinion at all.

[chionos]

Me and ma boy Vivacious Vixen Tooty Toot hanging out:

http://i64.photobucket.com/albums/h171/chionos/VVTTandI_zpsc2d2bf57.jpg (http://s64.photobucket.com/user/chionos/media/VVTTandI_zpsc2d2bf57.jpg.html)

[Slothy]

Kudos on the excellent hat fellow gentleman!

[Jowy]

Another like-minded, headgear enthusiast has pointed me in this direction! I have cool hats and no hair, so the choice is obvious.

http://www.elpixelilustre.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/henry-hatsworth.jpg

Henry Hatsworth seems like the best choice for a mascot in my opinion. Just look at him.

[Slothy]

A gentleman's gentleman if ever I saw one. :holmes:

[Calliope]

43233

Solid.

[Slothy]

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_2fEw_glVkog/StU5eSGsE9I/AAAAAAAAAJ4/1ur2aSxPcaM/s400/very+dapper+fellow.jpg

This kid, he get's it.

[Calliope]

Hatter-boy!

[Sephex]

I wear a cap occasionally. I'm in.

[sharkythesharkdogg]

Naturally, I'm a member. I also provide photographic evidence that hats help enlighten minds, and commune with nature. (http://home.eyesonff.com/members/6382.html)

[Aulayna]

Well as this is the only party that's provided me with spreadsheet evidence so far...



So here's a still with a hat!

43243

I'm in biznitches!

[Calliope]

Good work, everyone! Hats for all...but no cap on our awesomeness.

[Slothy]

More excellent hatted folks joining the most gentlemanly of parties. Excellent.

No surprise given some of the greatest men ever have worn hats:
http://cdn-media.hollywood.com/images/l/indiana-jones.jpg

[Calliope]

The Cunning Cap Party is pro-gender-equality:

http://i.huffpost.com/gen/1038237/thumbs/o-AUDREY-HEPBURN-PHOTO-570.jpg

[Quina]

Does a chef's hat count as a cap?

[Slothy]

The Cunning Cap Party is pro-gender-equality:

http://i.huffpost.com/gen/1038237/thumbs/o-AUDREY-HEPBURN-PHOTO-570.jpg

Absolutely. Though I will continue to refer to everyone equally as a gentleman because that's how I roll.


Does a chef's hat count as a cap?

It couldn't count as anything else.

[Calliope]

Does a chef's hat count as a cap?

It sure does! Please join us :love:

[Quina]

I will join you if you tell me which hat I should wear to the ball. I am the head chef for it.

[Calliope]

Well, what hats were you choosing between?

[Quina]

I will leave that exercise to the reader.

[Calliope]

In that case, I say Quina takes the crown!

[Election Booth]

I like hats.

[Quina]

If you post a picture of me wearing the crown I will join you.

[Calliope]

I like hats.

I made this for you, Election Booth!

http://i42.:bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou:/2ztg0lc.jpg

http://i42.:bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou:/2ztg0lc.jpg

Quina, I will get right on it!

[Freya]

I do like hats but i don't wear them enough to join a party about hats :/

But good luck on looking dapper!

[Election Booth]

I like hats.

I made this for you, Election Booth!

http://i42.:bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou:/2ztg0lc.jpg

Quina, I will get right on it!

If I wear it, will it imply favoritism?

[Nicolas]

Through the gentlemanly persuasion of Calliope, I believe I would like to join, good sirs.

[edczxcvbnm]

I am in.

Hats are so awesome they even made a game called Hatris. Enough said!

[Calliope]

I like hats.

I made this for you, Election Booth!

http://i42.:bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou:/2ztg0lc.jpg

Quina, I will get right on it!

If I wear it, will it imply favoritism?

It could only imply good taste and good fortune.

Huzzah Nico!

[Calliope]

http://i44.:bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou:/atvudw.jpg

^_^?

[Quina]

Wonderful! Consider me a member of this wonderful hat party. Can you shrink it down to fit in my signature?

[Calliope]

http://i42.:bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou:/54xceo.jpg

I can change it around if you want, probably the background colour at least. Welcome aboard!

[Quina]

It's...so beautiful.

[Calliope]

I'm glad you like it :love:

With Vivi22, Chionos, Sephex, edczxcvbnm, Jowy, sharkythesharkdogg, Aulayna, Nicolas, Quina and myself, I believe we are at the ten member limit.

I tip my hat to all of you!

PS - Election Booth, wear your hat ><;;;

[Election Booth]

Hm... as a public servant, I am hesitant to accept gifts in my position.

What the hell. Bring on all the gifts!

[Calliope]

Yay! So worth my carpal tunnel tomorrow ;_;

Well, it's late, and I'm kinda thirsty, so I'm going to go...for a nightcap :D :D :D

[Jowy]

Through the gentlemanly persuasion of Calliope, I believe I would like to join, good sirs.

PARTY ON, GARTH!

[Slothy]

Now that we are at capacity, I say we decide on a Vice President and our representatives for the different forums. My pick would probably be Calliope for Vice President given her excellent efforts to recruit the most gentlemanly of members.

For the others I'd like to see what people would like to step up and do. Remember, we need representatives for the general forums, gaming forums, and the old school, golden age, and modern era FF forums. So do we have any volunteers or should I draw names out of a hat?

Actually, letting the gentlemanly hats decide sounds quite appropriate. :)

[Nicolas]

Now that we are at capacity, I say we decide on a Vice President and our representatives for the different forums. My pick would probably be Calliope for Vice President given her excellent efforts to recruit the most gentlemanly of members.

For the others I'd like to see what people would like to step up and do. Remember, we need representatives for the general forums, gaming forums, and the old school, golden age, and modern era FF forums. So do we have any volunteers or should I draw names out of a hat?

Actually, letting the gentlemanly hats decide sounds quite appropriate. :)

I second the Calliope for VeeP. Also, since we utilize the ever-so-gentlemanly hat, we should possible draw names out of one. It would be rather fitting.

[Pike]

I actually do have a Jayne hat. Perhaps I should joi- oh you guys are at max. Whoops. Shouldn't have waited so long I guess. xD

[Calliope]

A pity, but perhaps you can support us with a vote!

43262

If there are no objections, I humbly accept the nomination of VP. Let me know if anyone requires sig making services!

[The Summoner of Leviathan]

Or you can join us Pike. :)

[Slothy]

I shall keep my sig, but only since it contains the original cunning cap.

I've got to get packed and ready to go visit my sister, but I'll attempt to get everyone's names thrown in a hat tonight unless Calliope is able to do it before then.

[Calliope]

http://i40.:bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou:/2wdav54.jpg

I have your names in Spuuky's grandfather's genuine Stetson fedora. Ready?

[Quina]

Is this to determine who buys lunch?

[Calliope]

Why would we buy lunch when you're the greatest chef around?

[Quina]

I can't cook on an empty stomach.

[Calliope]

Then as Party Vice President, I advise you to enable cookies!

[Quina]

Cookies are the only reason I even go on the internet.

[Rita Skeeter]

A picture has been released on the tweethairs that shows your leader burning down all hat shops! How can you be a party about caps if your leader burns down the places you buy them at?

[Quina]

It was probably for the insurance money.

[Rita Skeeter]

This just in: The Cunning Cap Party is only in it for the insurance fraud!

[Quina]

Those lavish fancy-hat banquets don't fund themselves!

[Rob Roy]

Vivi22, this is Rob Roy of the South Wortham Gazette Times. How do you respond to allegations that members of your party were recently spotted purchasing caps made out of real coonskin?

[Shorty]

I am severely disappointed with the lack of mad hatters in this party so far. :colbert:

[Slothy]

Vivi22, this is Rob Roy of the South Wortham Gazette Times. How do you respond to allegations that members of your party were recently spotted purchasing caps made out of real coonskin?

I'm Canadian. We eat coons for breakfast. Why waste the pelt?

[Nicolas]

I am severely disappointed with the lack of mad hatters in this party so far. :colbert:

We have plenty of mad hatters. We are clearly defined by our mad hattery! For shame!

[Shorty]

Vivi22, this is Rob Roy of the South Wortham Gazette Times. How do you respond to allegations that members of your party were recently spotted purchasing caps made out of real coonskin?We eat coons for breakfast.

Even the vegan one?

[Quina]

Why would the raccoon's dietary habits make any difference?

[Shorty]

Seems to me like you don't know your party members as well as you think!

[Calliope]

Vivi22, this is Rob Roy of the South Wortham Gazette Times. How do you respond to allegations that members of your party were recently spotted purchasing caps made out of real coonskin?We eat coons for breakfast.

Even the vegan one?

Boca makes some pretty good coon patties, they're pretty convincing.

[The Pink Extremist]

Another party ran by a mod? I am starting to see a pattern! This election is a mockery of the democratic system! They are just continuing to deceive the masses into thinking we have a voice but they are trying to suppress us! Equal-opportunity, yet still employing masculine addresses, ruled by the elites no less! REVOLT EOFFERS! REVOLT AGAINST THIS SYSTEMATIC REPRESSION!

[Jowy]

Another party ran by a mod? I am starting to see a pattern! This election is a mockery of the democratic system! They are just continuing to deceive the masses into thinking we have a voice but they are trying to suppress us! Equal-opportunity, yet still employing masculine addresses, ruled by the elites no less! REVOLT EOFFERS! REVOLT AGAINST THIS SYSTEMATIC REPRESSION!

Someone's butthurt that we filled up fast. :aimsun:

[Calliope]

I'm pulling the names from the hat right now! Drumroll please:

General - chionos
Gaming - edczxcvbnm
Old School - Quina
Golden Age - Aulayna
Modern Era - Jowy

Any questions/quarrels?

[Quina]

So I kick it old school? I can dig that.

[Nicolas]

I'm pulling the names from the hat right now! Drumroll please:

General - chionos
Gaming - edczxcvbnm
Old School - Quina
Golden Age - Aulayna
Modern Era - Jowy

Any questions/quarrels?

That works for me. The less responsibility the better~

[Sephex]

edczxcvbnm is a good choice for gaming.

[Jowy]

I'm better off in old school. I honestly haven't finished anything past FFT.

[Calliope]

If you and Quina want to swap, that should be fine. Even Harry Potter questioned the sorting hat, man.

[Jowy]

If you and Quina want to swap, that should be fine. Even Harry Potter questioned the sorting hat, man.

Quina, this seems logical and reasonable. Don't keep your thinking cap on for too long about this one.

[Quina]

So now I'm in the Modern Family division?

[Formalhaut]

This just in: The Cunning Cap Party is only in it for the insurance fraud!



http://www.ohsnap.ca/img/thumbnails/oh-snap.jpg

[Aulayna]

I'm pulling the names from the hat right now! Drumroll please:

General - chionos
Gaming - edczxcvbnm
Old School - Quina
Golden Age - Aulayna
Modern Era - Jowy

Any questions/quarrels?

Uh-oh, what have I been volunteered for. WHADDIDO?

[Slothy]

You've been volunteered to run for office in the Golden Age forums. Don't worry, it entails absolutely no real responsibility. Just like being on staff to be honest.

[Rob Roy]

Vivi22, this is Rob Roy of the South Wortham Gazette Times. How do you respond to allegations that members of your party were recently spotted purchasing caps made out of real coonskin?

I'm Canadian. We eat coons for breakfast. Why waste the pelt?
So you support animal cruelty?

[Slothy]

You mistake using animals for food and clothing for animal cruelty. The two are quite separate. The animals should obviously be killed as quickly and painlessly as possible.

[Rob Roy]

The animals should obviously be killed as quickly and painlessly as possible.
What are these "as painlessly" methods you are using? It sounds like the animal is still in pain. What other animals do you kill for hats? Have you thought about reforming the party to only include non-fur and animal-killed hats?

[Slothy]

The animals should obviously be killed as quickly and painlessly as possible.
What are these "as painlessly" methods you are using? It sounds like the animal is still in pain.

They're in less pain than you will be in when I make a hat out of you I can assure you of that much.


What other animals do you kill for hats? Have you thought about reforming the party to only include non-fur and animal-killed hats?

I kill any non-endangered animal I want if I feel it will make a fine hat. We do have Vegan options for folks like Calliope of course, but I have no qualms with animals dying to improve my gentlemanliness and dapper stats.

[Calliope]

Before we get rebranded as the Off With Your Head Party, I would like to demonstrate that sometimes animals choose to willingly act as temporary hats:

http://i42.:bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou::bou:/14oao87.jpg

Although we have yet to get a good picture of this phenomenon, the above picture illustrates that a few times per month, a kindly Harris Hawk alights upon my noggin and gently perches there with his razor sharp talons as I clean his enclosure and bring him fresh food and water. He's a lovely little bird :love:

Harris Hawk Hat: +75 Benevolence +800 Awesomesauce +200 Tolerance for Trolls

[Del Murder]

Might I suggest better protection such as a helmet or possibly to not wander onto the turf of an apparently territorial hawk.

[Calliope]

1) I used to wear a plinth helmet when in his enclosure, until it become more than apparent that it is not necessary to do so - my eyes, limbs and head are covered, and if it came to it, I could quickly leave his enclosure, or simply swat him away.
2) He's not being territorial.
3) It's not aimless wandering, and you know it.

So no, not really :roll2

[Del Murder]

I would never imply that it was aimless.

[Rob Roy]

I have no qualms with animals dying to improve my gentlemanliness and dapper stats.
What other animals do you kill to "improve your gentlemanliness and dapper stats"?

[Calliope]

I think what Vivi means is that when one dons a hat of a more than becoming nature, it is not uncommon to find that your peers are suddenly dying to pay you a call, buy you a drink or save a spot on your dancecard. You could say that the quintessential cap makes one a ladykiller.

[Rob Roy]

You could say that the quintessential cap makes one a ladykiller.
This just in: Calliope claims to be a woman!

[Pumpkin]

I like some hats.

I don't like other hats.

Hats cover up my bad hair.

I don't approve of animal killing for hats.

My boyfriend is in this party and I think I'm supposed to support him, or whatever.

Is this party for me?

EDIT: I know you're at capacity, but I still need to root for someone.

[Formalhaut]

but I still need to root for someone.

Your signature is pink Shion! Your spiritual home should be with the Fluffy Pink Party! We have pink food at our conferences!

[Election Booth]

A shameless attempt from The Fluffy Pink Party to snatch up recruits! Will shion find her home among hats or among colors? We'll find out.

[Slothy]

You could say that the quintessential cap makes one a ladykiller.

It's true. I already melted Shorty. Probably melted her twice to be honest.

[Aulayna]

I really want to make an inappropriate joke here about Rantz, Shorty and a hat for a different kind of head. But yeah that'd probably get me banned.

So I'll leave that one to your imaginations.

[Rob Roy]

Inside Scoop!

The following letter and photo were sent to me from an unidentified source:

Dear Rob Roy,

Last year, I happened to be wandering around EoFFville, spreading peace and love, when I chanced upon a hat burning rally. I thought this was a great idea to cook marshmellows to feed to the homeless, so I got closer, when.. and I kid you not, I saw none other than Vivi22 leading the rally! Here's a picture I took:

http://img153.imageshack.us/img153/8841/thehatburning.png

While I find this somewhat hypocritical, I still love everyone from the Cunning Cap Party. Their fascination with headgear is great and keeps the head warm! It's very important! But, the public should be made aware of everything, so they are the most informed.

Thanks Rob Roy!
No, thank you fellow citizen. We are all just doing our part to keep the public informed during these most crucial elections.

[Shorty]

I really want to make an inappropriate joke here about Rantz, Shorty and a hat for a different kind of head. But yeah that'd probably get me banned.

So I'll leave that one to your imaginations.

A different kind of head? ??? :confused:

Vivi, what the shit! You fucking cap-burner! I thought you stood for something!

[Slothy]

It's a Yankees cap. There is absolutely nothing cunning, dapper, or gentlemanly about a Yankees cap. They disgrace the cap by putting their awful logo on it. /BlueJays

[Shorty]

Does this mean you discriminate against certain kinds of caps?

This is an outrage.

[Aulayna]

I really want to make an inappropriate joke here about Rantz, Shorty and a hat for a different kind of head. But yeah that'd probably get me banned.

So I'll leave that one to your imaginations.

A different kind of head? ??? :confused:

The joke involved condoms... and the head of the thing between the legs... and well... you'll probably figure out where that one's going!

[Shorty]

No thank you, Rantz already has a flat we plan to share.

[Formalhaut]

Can I just interject and say that at the Fluffy Pink Party, we welcome all kinds of hats, because we are a party of equality and love. :jess:

[Slothy]

Does this mean you discriminate against certain kinds of caps?

This is an outrage.

I discriminate against Yankees who defile caps and the sport of Baseball. Caps that refuse to change must be purged lest they infect the others with their burning, puss filled, venereal disease that is the New York Yankees.

[Formalhaut]

I discriminate against Yankees who defile caps and the sport of Baseball. Caps that refuse to change must be purged lest they infect the others with their burning, puss filled, venereal disease that is the New York Yankees.

But why discriminate when yankee caps can be loved and cherished for what they are? :love:

[Aulayna]

I discriminate against Yankees who defile caps and the sport of Baseball. Caps that refuse to change must be purged lest they infect the others with their burning, puss filled, venereal disease that is the New York Yankees.

But why discriminate when yankee caps can be loved and cherished for what they are? :love:

A symbol of scumbaggery the world over?

[Formalhaut]

"A cap does not maketh the man.

And even if thy man were a scumbagg'th, thy shall be lov'd through eternity"

[Slothy]

Alright folks, we've got a little over another day to get the rest of the requirements figured out.

-Decide on your motto.
-Decide on your slogan (yes, they are different)
-Draw a sigil/crest for your party.

My thought for a motto is, "a hat for every head. Unless you're a Yankee." And for our slogan, "for the gentleman in all of us."

Yea or nea? Any artsy people want to handle our sigil/crest?

[Rob Roy]

News Alert!
The following late-breaking update was sent to me by an anonymous member.

Well, I don't want my name associated with this - I'm a little bit afraid, if truth be told! - but the other day, Vivi22 grabbed my crotch and told me that I felt like a real man, but added that if I wanted to remain one I might want to join the Cunning Cap party, and soon. I'm currently trying to act a bit low key and hoping he forgets about me since his party is already full, but I daren't join any other party for fear of angering him!

You heard it here first folks! Stay vigilant and let's make sure we know what these candidates are really like.

[Formalhaut]

News Alert!
The following late-breaking update was sent to me by an anonymous member.

Well, I don't want my name associated with this - I'm a little bit afraid, if truth be told! - but the other day, Vivi22 grabbed my crotch and told me that I felt like a real man, but added that if I wanted to remain one I might want to join the Cunning Cap party, and soon. I'm currently trying to act a bit low key and hoping he forgets about me since his party is already full, but I daren't join any other party for fear of angering him!

Is Vivi22 the Theon cock-torturer from GoT?

[Calliope]

Motto: Hatters gonna hat!

Slogan: Brimming with awesome, capped with hattitude.

Crest: TBC

[Slothy]

Those are way better than mine Calliope. I approve! :exdee:

[sharkythesharkdogg]

Indeed, those are good work.

Work had me M.I.A. except for short visits. What's my job?

[Calliope]

I'm not sure. In the meantime...crest/sigil? I dunno, I should be asleep.

<a href="http://smg.photobucket.com/user/Calliope/media/capcap_zpsbcd39b59.jpg.html" target="_blank">http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v119/Calliope/capcap_zpsbcd39b59.jpg</a>

[Slothy]

I love it!

[Rob Roy]

This Just In!

Thanks to another inside source for helping me get this scoop on The Cunning Cap party:


I know for a fact that some of those hats haven't been washed in like... forever! Oh, and I know that one of them was on a head with lice! They're all dirty... or at the very least, lice-ridden.

[Calliope]

THIS JUST IN! SCANDALOUS! The lice-ridden party supporter is actually:

http://www.thelastbestwest.com/graphics/2009/Hats/sUNDANCE/250_redford_kid_292.jpg

http://cdn.thedailybeast.com/content/dailybeast/articles/2011/01/22/robert-redford-on-sundance-and-his-future/_jcr_content/body/inlineimage.img.503.jpg/1337256000000.cached.jpg

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_S6THPXRqC9E/TM-pR20Z4yI/AAAAAAAAAXA/bXyFLC5wVuE/s320/The-Sting-Movie-Robert-Redford.jpg

ROY ROY, HIMSELF!

[Rob Roy]

Extra!
Today, devoted readers, you get a glimpse into the humble life of your very own news servant, Rob Roy.

Very few know this, but I am actually one of quintuplets. I shared the womb with three others: Belvin, Melvin and Zelvin. Eager to be successful in life, I was first out of the womb and onto my Mother's teat, determined to gain nourishment to strengthen my body and mind for the battles that lay ahead. This zeal for achievement left a bitter taste upon the tongues of my three younger siblings, who began to resent me. Try as they may, they could never measure up in my mother's eye and I was held above them. I would even extend the proverbial olive branch at times, trying to offer the services of my superior intellect to help them plod through the more mundane activities that life would put in their way, often stumped at how to proceed. But this branch was cast aside, my brothers pride would not allow them to accept my help when they needed it most.

It is with a heavy heart that I tell you this story. For my three brothers (pictured above) never allowed me to help them to realize their full potential and now they count down the days until lady death's delicate touch draws them to the next phase of their existence. In the meantime, they plod along the surface of the earth, wearing a variety of hats, caps, derbys and other assorted headwear, all infected with lice. I do not know why this travesty has fallen them and I am spared, allowed to share my lucious locks with the world. But please do not hold this against them, for theirs is a tough lot and they bear so much already.

Thank you and good night.

[Calliope]

It is interesting that with such skeletons as Huey, Dewey and Louie knocking about in your closet, that you have fashioned a living exploiting the similar sadnesses of others. I would guess that it is not your achievements your bothered brothers resent, but your lack of compassion and excessive notion of "superiority", and thus they don their caps as a horrid hairshirt, their only means of expressing their familial frustration and sibling sorrow. Either way, it is a shame, and I set my hat on the sidewalk to collect donations for the most lice-ridden trio.

PS - Vivi, let us know when you've submitted our application to EB, yes?

[Slothy]

Already done Calliope.

[Calliope]

Sweet. *hattip*

[Matoya]

Hello partiers.

This here is Matoya, resporter and investigator for the EyesOn news. There seems to be rumors abound about your members and ethics. You calim to love hats. Then your spotted burning the very thing you love. Is this how you will treat the memberbase if elected? Favor those who agree with you and set out to burn the rest? Will you stand for equality or will corruption run rampant in your streets? You've been accused of fraud. Burnings and insurance scams and the mismanagement of money. Is this how you will deal with Eyes on Final Fnatasies fragile economy? Not to mention your members seem to have lice and crabs on their heads. What's up with that. How can we expect you to manage the forums properly if you can't even manage yourselves properly? EyesOn news wants to know!

[Slothy]

You calim to love hats. Then your spotted burning the very thing you love. Is this how you will treat the memberbase if elected? Favor those who agree with you and set out to burn the rest?

That depends. How many members are Yankees fans?


Will you stand for equality or will corruption run rampant in your streets? You've been accused of fraud. Burnings and insurance scams and the mismanagement of money. Is this how you will deal with Eyes on Final Fnatasies fragile economy?

As the only accountant on the forums I can safely say that I am the most qualified to manage EoFF's economy.


Not to mention your members seem to have lice and crabs on their heads. What's up with that.

Rob Roy's brothers have never officially joined, nor do they represent, the Cunning Cap Party or it's members.

[Jowy]

I'm not sure. In the meantime...crest/sigil? I dunno, I should be asleep.

<a rel="nofollow" href="http://smg.photobucket.com/user/Calliope/media/capcap_zpsbcd39b59.jpg.html" target="_blank">http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v119/Calliope/capcap_zpsbcd39b59.jpg</a>

With such a majestic tophat being the physical embodiment, you can't really help but look at it and automatically assume that we pride ourselves on hygiene. We'd never let that happen to such a fine hat.

BUT THAT'S NOT ALL! ROB ROY I AM CALLING YOU OUT.

On <a href=http://home.eyesonff.com/general-chat/150104-ace-party-3.html#post3259599>this here little post</a>, you've shot yourself in the foot by trying to pass off a poor photoshop job. That is in no way Iceglow's mobile phone as AT&T isn't available across the pond. That one little detail exposes you for the fraud that you are, good sir. Checkmate.

[Iceglow]

I can't help but read your name as The Cumming Cap Party. Or a more expletive word -ing cap party. You really can't be taken serious as a political power with such a bad name.

[Jowy]

I can't help but read your name as The Cumming Cap Party. Or a more expletive word -ing cap party. You really can't be taken serious as a political power with such a bad name.

Way to piss off some powerful allies. I had your back, bro.

Pistols at dawn.

[Calliope]

We should just change our name to the Lice & Violence Animal-Slaughter Party. Jesus Eric, there is no way I would do pistols at dawn, what are you thinking?

It has to be at least noon before I'm ready for that trout. Pistols at noon. Or midnight.

Also, I can't figure out what the expletive ala Icebro might be.

[Jowy]

We should just change our name to the Lice & Violence Animal-Slaughter Party. Jesus Eric, there is no way I would do pistols at dawn, what are you think?

It has to be at least noon before I'm ready for that shit. Pistols at noon. Or midnight.

Also, I can't figure out what the expletive ala Icebro might be.

I'd be willing to compromise with noon if I can wear a novelty SHERIFF ERIC badge like you find in airport gift shops.

[Iceglow]

I can't help but read your name as The Cumming Cap Party. Or a more expletive word -ing cap party. You really can't be taken serious as a political power with such a bad name.

Way to piss off some powerful allies. I had your back, bro.

Pistols at dawn.


Bro I love you, I love pretty much all of y'all in this party. I just can't stop mis-reading the name...

It's in my nature, don't hate ;)

[Calliope]

Sheriff, can we give him a dunce cap?

[Rob Roy]

This just in!

Already done Calliope.
Vivi22 started The Cunning Cap party to lure women into sexual encounters!

[Slothy]

Lure? She came onto me bby. :-*

[Calliope]

Hah! So Mr Roy has accepted that I am a woman, now? :roll2

[Slothy]

As his web of lies and deceit grows he can barely keep them straight any more.

[Calliope]

Also, I just re-read your last reply. I am not that forward! I wish El Spuuko were here.

[Slothy]

It was mutual then? Once I saw your lovely hats I couldn't resist.

[Calliope]

No! I feel as if I am not very good at articulation these last couple of days ;_;

[Slothy]

Don't feel bad. I'm not very good at reading subtext any day. :D

[Jowy]

Sheriff, can we give him a dunce cap?

I'm gonna take that a step higher and just make him wear a road cone. That way you'll see his shame from yards away.

[Calliope]

I did actually think about road cones. *high-five*

[Election Booth]

I believe I responded to you all, but you are still missing the "create a task for another party task". Hop to it! I'll use the first one I get, but I need it ASAP.

[Election Booth]

Round one revelations are up! (http://home.eyesonff.com/general-chat/150209-eyes-final-fantasy-elections-part-i-vote-your-eyeson-party-4.html#post3265863)

[Calliope]

Srsly, you guys!!

The Cunning Cap Party:
Vivi22 has accrued 125 gil for completion of the character and presidential tasks.
Aulayna has accrued 25 gil for completion of the character task.
Calliope has accrued 225 gil for voting and completion of the character task.
Jowy has accrued 25 gil for completion of the thread task.
Quina has accrued 25 gil for completion of the character task.
sharky has accrued 25 gil for completion of the character task.
TOTAL: 450 gil

How was I the only one who bothered to vote? More like the Cap-in-Hand party :mad2:

[Aulayna]

I was 3rd on posts and 1st on threads created during the week that the thread/post thing was running. :colbert: I may have forgotten to post a list about it... But I abstained from voting because the only people I would vote for was us, and I had to give the other parties a sporting chance!

[Election Booth]

Round two is up! Have a look! (http://home.eyesonff.com/general-chat/150209-eyes-final-fantasy-elections-part-ii-wagin-war-8.html#post3266216)

[Aulayna]

Because we have nothing to fear in public here's our map!

http://www.radiant-mythology.com/eoff/eoffmap.jpg

Is anyone on for the 2nd task?

[Slothy]

A war strategy to take out another party? I was born for that. I'll take care of it tomorrow.


How was I the only one who bothered to vote? More like the Cap-in-Hand party :mad2:

To be fair, Round one coincided with me being laid up with a debilitating illness. I suspect poison on the part of another party to try and take me out of the game and leave our party leaderless. Little do they know how ready you are to take the reigns in a time of emergency.

[Calliope]

I'm no Hero of Canton, but I'll do! Hope you're feeling better.

Aulayna, that is one epic map :D

[Slothy]

Now, maybe it's just me, but I never liked the look of that Newbie Party. Buncha people we ain't never seen before showing up outta nowhere, chattin' us up about EoFF. Tryin' to learn stuff about us. Probin' for weaknesses I reckon. Now the Fascist party is evil, no doubt, but them's the devil we know. What do we know about these Newbie's? Nuthin' side from they're new, they hate hats, and they be livin' practically next door.

Doesn't sit well with me. Not on ruttin' bit. I say these guys is probably the folks hiding them WMB's or whatever. And even if they ain't, I'll feel a might bit safer with them outta the way if you catch my meaning.

Now the thing is, any good plan a attack's gotta involve the element a surprise. When we hit, we gotta hit hard and they gotta be lookin' the other way. I'm thinking we start with a good distraction. Mebbe Zoe gettin' neked.

43729

Wait, now here me out sweet cheeks-

43730

Okay, I can get neked-

43731

FINE. Ain't nobody gotta get neked. I got me a plan B. See, we been preparing for the possibility of war with these Newbie's for a while. We got ourselves all kinds a guns, and planes and all the gorram bombs a man could want. But we really only need one thing: grenades.

See, there's a train that runs straight from the lounge to the Newbie headquarters. Those folks need their daily fill a talkin' about movin' pictures and Games a Thrones and some such else. Ain't but one place that comes from. I figger we fly in nice and low in Serenity, pop a top hatch open, and set us up a buncha grenades on a nice long timer right next to the fuel. Train stops in Newbieshire, timer runs out, and their headquarters is hurtin' pretty bad. In the confusion's when we have one a our planes air drop in a sign, big enough ta be seen from space, sayin' Reavers eat free. Then all we gotta do is guard the boarder, pop any crazy cannibal folks strays our way, and the Newbie party ain't no more with us barely havin' ta lift a finger.

[Shorty]

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v625/lostncybr/Fire%20Fly/FireFly%20TV%20show/serenity583.jpg

I didn't sign up for this.

[Jinx]

I just came here to post that Auly did an amazing job on that map, and it made me giggle a few times. Good job, Aulayna. :) Everyone go rep her!

[Election Booth]

More tasks are up! Good luck with completing them! (http://home.eyesonff.com/general-chat/150209-eyes-final-fantasy-elections-part-ii-wagin-war-tasks-galore-8.html#post3268492)

[Aulayna]

Don't really have the time (or energy) for this right now sadly. :(

[Vincent, Thunder God]

Quina's cap!

waaaaaiiiiiitttt

Google Image Result for http://images3.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20111112235021/megamitensei/images/b/b9/Marie_portrait.png (http://www.google.ca/imgres?imgurl=http://images3.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20111112235021/megamitensei/images/b/b9/Marie_portrait.png&imgrefurl=http://megamitensei.wikia.com/wiki/Marie&h=781&w=705&sz=276&tbnid=OdfjpQjizNgfSM:&tbnh=90&tbnw=81&zoom=1&usg=__SvKeroe7K9yZYiYT9T8lb_iprX0=&docid=VmuVBPqwyC7w8M&sa=X&ei=GYTLUcDoI4Le0gGexoEo&ved=0CDsQ9QEwAQ&dur=4487)

[Election Booth]

Hello, good people of The Cunning Cap Party!

This public servant never received a PM from you in regard to your completed tasks. Please respond post-haste if you have completed everything. It would really and truly hurt me to disqualify you for non-participation. Please do not make me do such a thing.

Are you going to let those nerds in the Ace Party and dweebs in the Newbie Party win? ARE YOU?