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Shorty
07-08-2013, 02:06 AM
WHAT IF WE'RE IN A LIFEBOAT SITUATION? You've gotta have priorities!

You and five other EoFFers are in a lifeboat. Who's there, who makes it and who doesn't for what reason?

Jinx
07-08-2013, 02:12 AM
Denmark
Shorty
Locky
Laddy
Happy Noodle Boy

Chemical
07-08-2013, 02:57 AM
It would make sense for other Aussies or NZers to be on board... Jiro, Mike, Noodle, Locky if she is here... I guarantee we all make it because I am feeling unusually optimistic today. You could say I feel lucky, punk.

NeoCracker
07-08-2013, 03:04 AM
All girls wouldn't work, cause you women would just start touching eachother instead of me, and I'd be the first tossed off. :(

So instead I pick one hot girl and 4 dudes who are even creepier then I am!

krissy
07-08-2013, 04:08 AM
Four of us survived... ...Raistlin and Loony BoB were already onboard. Raistlin threw me a lifebuoy and pulled me aboard. Chemical held onto some bananas and made it to the lifeboat. Raistlin, Raistlin was a disgusting man. He ate a rat. We had food enough for weeks, but he found the rat in the first few days - and he killed it, and dried it in the sun and ate it. He was such a brute, that man. But he was resourceful. It was his idea to build the raft to catch fish. We would have died in those first few days without him. Loony BoB was the same man who brought rice with gravy, the Buddhist. We didn't understand much of what he said, only that he was suffering. I can still hear him - the happy Buddhist who only ate rice with gravy. He had broken his leg horribly in the fall. We tried to set it as best we could, but the leg became infected and Raistlin told us we had to do something or he'd die. Raistlin said he'd do it, but Chemical and I had to hold the man down. And I believed him - we needed to do it.So... I kept saying, "I'm sorry, I'msorry", but he just kept.. lookingat me, his eyes so... I'll never understand the point of that man's suffering. We didn't save him, of course. He died. The morning after, Raistlin caught his first dorado, and I didn't understand what he'd done at first, but Chemical did, and I'd never seen her so angry. 'Stop whining and be happy,' he said. "We need more food or we'll die. That was the whole point.' 'What was the point?' Chemical asked. "You let that poor boy die in order to get bait?You monster!' Raistlin got furious.He started towards her with his fists raised, and Chemical slapped him hard, right across the face. I was stunned. I thought he was going to kill her right then. But he didn't. Raistlin didn't stop atbait either, no. Loony BoB, hewent the same way the rat went -Raistlin was a resourceful man. It was a week later that he... Because of me. Because I couldn't hold onto a stupid turtle. It slipped out of my hands and swam away and Raistlin came up and punched me on the side of the head and my teeth clackedand I saw stars. I thought he was going to hit me again, but then Chemical started pounding on him with her fists and screaming, "MONSTER!MONSTER!" She yelled at me to go to the raft - "Nee poda!" I thought she was coming with me or I'd never have... I don't know why I didn't make her go first. I think about that every day. I jumped over and turned back just as the knife came out. There wasn't anything I could do; I couldn't look away... He threw her body overboard. Then the sharks came. I saw what they... I saw. The next day I killed him. He didn't even fight back. He knew he had gone too far, even by his standards. He'd left the knife out on the bench. And I did to him what he did to Loony BoB. He was such an evil man, but worse still, he brought the evil out in me.

Unbreakable Will
07-08-2013, 05:42 AM
Psychotic
Iceglow
NCG
Shorty
Noxious

We all survive except for Iceglow, we eat him to sustain ourselves. We were saved a mere day after killing and devouring him and we all had a good laugh at his misfortune.

Laddy
07-08-2013, 06:19 AM
Denmark
Shorty
Locky
Laddy
Happy Noodle Boy
This is how I'd survive.

I'd, in private, make a pact with three others to throw one overboard. Then, insisting that our pact is still gold with two others, we'd eliminate the second. Then I'd repeat until the other is gone. Finally, it will be just Boobs and I. We'd head to Brazil and film a gay porno.

Loony BoB
07-08-2013, 07:19 AM
4 dudes who are even creepier then I am!
She said EoFFers.

Araciel
07-08-2013, 07:36 AM
I eat them all.

NeoCracker
07-08-2013, 08:23 AM
4 dudes who are even creepier then I am!
She said EoFFers.

...There has to be at least ONE guy here creepier then me. :(

Night Fury
07-08-2013, 09:19 AM
and I'd be the first tossed off. :(

:stare:

Huckleberry Quin
07-08-2013, 09:55 AM
It doesn't matter who I'm with, I would insist upon being eaten first, despite my gammy leg.

TrollHunter
07-08-2013, 10:28 AM
Implying there are 5 EoFFers worthy of joining me on a lifeboat.
BAH
I'd have anyone who even thought of getting on MY lifeboat shot and used as decoration for the boat.

Pike
07-08-2013, 10:32 AM
Mister Adequate
Laddy
Vivi22
NeoCracker
Bolivar

We survive by arguing about videogames because every single one of these people would fight death off indefinitely in order to have the last word about a game.

Chris
07-08-2013, 11:57 AM
The more troubling question is why I would be sailing the oceans with any of you to begin with. :stare:

Loony BoB
07-08-2013, 12:18 PM
Okay, having thought about this long enough, it all really depends on how I want to go about it.

Survival Earned - if I'm after people who will help me survive the wild.
Flying Mullet
Knox
Miriel
theundeadhero
Vivi22

Everyone makes it because we are the ultimate team. After Flying Mullet's epic calves propel us to the nearest island, hero and Knox start setting us up for survival using their outstanding training in the U.S. military. Vivi22 creates a bow and uses it to expertly hunt animals which Miriel cooks to perfection. It's tough, but we're all fairly determined people capable of motivating ourselves and each other when it's needed. We make it through in the end, but I break my arm, Knox catches a cold and hero gets sick after wiping his arse with some unusual plant.

Survival Guaranteed - if I'm after people who will be great to spend my time with on the lifeboat.
Calliope
DK
Locky
Shorty
smittenkitten

Everyone makes it because we get found by a fancy yacht owned by an aging billionaire pretty early on and get VIP treatment for the entire journey. It is amazing. Someone hooks up with a butler and gets an STI, but I'm not telling who because I don't go gossiping about my bro.

Psychotic
07-08-2013, 06:21 PM
me, faris, azar, shorty, denmark, will

because I want all the gingers in one fucking place so I can do what should've been done to them at birth: DROWN THEM.

Will isn't a ginger, but he chose me so I'd pick him for being a bro and I would probably need some help in putting down that many redheads.

Jinx
07-08-2013, 06:27 PM
me, faris, azar, shorty, denmark, will

because I want all the gingers in one smurfing place so I can do what should've been done to them at birth: DROWN THEM.



I TOLD YOU YOU WERE A GINGER FFS

Psychotic
07-08-2013, 06:29 PM
Both myself and none other than Tasty Crayon tried to explain this to him 10 years ago and he wasn't having any of it then either.

Shorty
07-08-2013, 06:29 PM
Rob and Will are not gingers.

Try and drown me. Try it.

Psychotic
07-08-2013, 06:31 PM
Well I imagine it's hard enough to get you to take a shower given how badly you smell, so your water dodging reflexes are probably at a very high level. I think I am up to the challenge though.

Shorty
07-08-2013, 06:34 PM
Joke's on you, I soaked in the tub for an hour last night. I smell like sunshine and daisies.

Psychotic
07-08-2013, 06:39 PM
Given that the sun would melt the very skin off you, are you saying you smell like roasted flesh? Now that I think of it, I did detect a hint of burned meat when I met you. That and a musty, sweaty, unclean kind of aroma. Maybe that's the daisies.

Shorty
07-08-2013, 06:41 PM
That burned flesh smell was the friction of your pants tent in reaction to us walking past the Dreamboats and Petticoats advertisement.

Loony BoB
07-08-2013, 06:54 PM
me, faris, azar, shorty, denmark, will

because I want all the gingers in one smurfing place so I can do what should've been done to them at birth: DROWN THEM.

Will isn't a ginger, but he chose me so I'd pick him for being a bro and I would probably need some help in putting down that many redheads.
Well, obviously if you're drowning gingers then Will has to be around, because you need one non-ginger on that boat to finish the job.

Psychotic
07-08-2013, 06:57 PM
joke's on you, you have to have hair to be a ginger :smug:

Denmark
07-08-2013, 07:17 PM
me, faris, azar, shorty, denmark, will

because I want all the gingers in one smurfing place so I can do what should've been done to them at birth: DROWN THEM.



I TOLD YOU YOU WERE A GINGER FFS

misinformed people thinking something does not make that thing true

see: eyes on each other

Faris
07-08-2013, 08:13 PM
Psychotic, Denmark, Cuch, Chris, and Shorty

Cuch and Chris use their manly muscles to use Psychotic and Denmark as paddles to row the boat. The two paddles are first to go, Cuch dies from lack of sleep and fear of what Chris will do to him, Chris dies from exhaustion and heart break. Shorty and I reenact scenes from 30 Rock until we are rescued by rich sexy Europeans and brought onto their yacht.

GINGER POWER :mwahaha:

Denmark
07-08-2013, 09:11 PM
why do i keep getting killed

Unbreakable Will
07-08-2013, 10:32 PM
why do i keep getting killed
44649

Chemical
07-09-2013, 01:48 AM
Krissy, Jesus Christ :p I read that yesterday and I still don't know what to think... Although I am a little skeptical that Raistlin didn't try to joust me... it makes me wonder if it really wasn't you all along... quite conveniant he would stop his rampage with me. Hmmmm

LunarWeaver
07-10-2013, 06:30 PM
Rantzien and Psychotic for the humor, The Summoner of Leviathan to see how far his love of water really goes, Shiny to be the black one, and Cim because he's a marine, or something like that. Maybe he'll give them a chance. I would be the first to die and what happens after that is their business.