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Mercen-X
08-06-2013, 06:01 AM
My mom's mom: 1) Did you go to church? 2) Pray to Mother Mary. 3) You should eat. 4) (to someone who is overweight) You're fat. 5) (to my mother, nearly word-for-word every time) You're fat, you should eat. (mixed message much?)
My dad's mom: 1) Can you do something for me? 2) Your brother is so successful.
My dad: 1) I don't know. (to any question) 2) I'm sick. (seeing a sneeze/cough then sneezing/coughing himself)
My mom: 1) I gained a half pound! :(
My dad's older brother: (upon hearing a bummer from my dad) 1) Oh, dude. Wait til you hear what happened to me.
My dad's younger brother: 1) Oh, dude. Check this out! Isn't my life awesome!
My dad's sister: 1) Yeah, that's great... I'm happy for you... (she hardly ever breaks her monotone)
My mom's deceased brother's wife: 1) I'm raising money for "insert here", can you pitch in. (later, we learn she spent this money on a trip or some kind of luxury other than the necessity she conned her family with)
Me: 1) You're wrong. 2) I'm right. 3) "insert random question" (even though I live with two dumb old people and could likely find the answer to my question on the internet which I'm usually on about ten hours a day.)

What are yours?

Shorty
08-06-2013, 06:43 AM
Those listed above don't necessarily sound like catchphrases. They more sound like common phrases the people say.

"Joke's on you, [reasons reasons reasons]."

Synoptikal
08-06-2013, 06:48 AM
"Here's a fun fact for you..."

Jiro
08-06-2013, 06:54 AM
Stay crispy.

Night Fury
08-06-2013, 06:55 AM
"PHILIP!" :mad2:

Jinx
08-06-2013, 12:12 PM
I'm always saying, "You dingus!" I also incorrectly say, "Calm your horses." But I've said it for so long now, it's my own thing.

noxious.sunshine
08-06-2013, 03:08 PM
I say "Ballin'!" & "baller" a lot.
And "I used to could (do something)"
"I'm ain't goin'"/"I'm ain't skurred"

I like to replace t's with k's and roll my t's like a Spanish r when I say "what" in a question. Like "whattttt I do?" It doesn't work for everything, though. Kinda hard to explain.

And I don't say "brah" or "bro". I say "breh". Again, you won't get it unless you hear it and then it'll probably get on your nerves.

Loony BoB
08-06-2013, 04:15 PM
Those listed above don't necessarily sound like catchphrases. They more sound like common phrases the people say.

"Joke's on you, [reasons reasons reasons]."
I don't think I've ever heard you say that.

<Shorty> You are the worst.
<Shorty> Just kidding!
<Shorty> You ass.

As for me...

<Loony_BoB> Rockin'.
<Loony_BoB> Penis
<Loony_BoB> doop doop
<Loony_BoB> Who's a what, now?
<Loony_BoB> A couple of years in therapy, they'll get over it.
<Loony_MoB> [name/object/words] is it just me or is it just me or is it just me

Shorty
08-06-2013, 05:09 PM
I say it IRL and I've said it plenty of times here. This is one I've never heard you say:


<Loony_MoB> [name/object/words] is it just me or is it just me or is it just me

I don't use just kidding very much anymore xD

Mercen-X
08-07-2013, 12:30 AM
Every now and then, I've been known to say, "I'm [expletive deleted] awesome!"
I knew a kid in High School who would say "That's Gangster!" which I assume meant "cool".
I dated a girl in college who said "nifty" a lot. When I confronted her about it later, she claimed she never used that word and that it must have been me.
My ex would always say, "Don't make fun of me" just because someone giggled at something she said or did. Of course, she was laughing too.
When my dad is left home alone, he always shouts "Me time!" If there's something to be done during the day and it's already past 4:30, my dad always "you/I/we can do it tomorrow." And if we cave, he says, "I win."

My family also has some real-life memes. After a Christmas gift turned out to be more for my dad than my mom to whom he had given it (a "bank" skull with a helmet emblazoned with a swastika). Since then, gifts that were more for the giver than the receiver were called "Nazi Skull Helmets" which I always picked at for being grammatically incorrect although to say it correctly, I think you'd need a longer sentence. A few months ago, I also told my dad by phone that I was feeling "anxious" because they were coming home and I'd hardly gotten any writing done using my computer which is why I wanted to stay home. Instead I'd wasted time on Deviant Art checking character genderbends... dork. Ever since, my dad shouts "Anxiety Level Rising" whenever someone comes home and there's a person on the computer who knows they'll have to give it up since they had it all day.

My dad does not just say "I don't know" when asked a question. One time in particular, my mom was frantic about having misplaced a lot of money (like $300), my dad said, "Don't jump to conclusions. Maybe I took it, I don't know." He actually said this... that maybe he took it and yet somehow he still doesn't know. Does that sound reassuring to you? My mom said she had to be sure and my dad said it wasn't important. Eventually my mom did remember where she put it so my dad wasn't lying about anything, he's just really... blank.

Sephex
08-07-2013, 12:50 AM
Well, that's the way the spider melts!

*laugh track*

Synoptikal
08-07-2013, 07:16 AM
"Whatever floats your boat. ...Buoyancy I hope."

"First things first. ...No, let's have first things third!"

I get annoyed by obvious statements so I tend to alter them slightly when I say them personally.

"Time you got a watch!" - Response to "What time is it?"

"Don't fall - it gets you down." - Response to someone tripping.

Yeah, I can be annoying. XD

Loony BoB
08-07-2013, 10:56 AM
I say it IRL and I've said it plenty of times here. This is one I've never heard you say:


<Loony_MoB> [name/object/words] is it just me or is it just me or is it just me

I don't use just kidding very much anymore xD
It's very new and it's because of my phone and it's predicted-next-word stuff, but I don't know if that counts as "real life" or "online". I say the others out loud, though, as well as online.

I think online catch phrases are much more fun than offline ones, though.

Yerushalmi
08-07-2013, 04:40 PM
My catchphrases are:


"I'm an editor."
"I'm the kind of guy who..."
"Because they're STUPID!"
"You have got to be kidding me."
"Pick a lane, doofus!" (to other drivers)
"I don't know, I've never been there." (in response to being asked "What's up?")
"Your voice" (in response to "Ma Nishma?", the Hebrew equivalent to "What's up?", which literally means "What is heard?", hence the response)
"You just did." (in response to being asked "Can I ask you a question?")
"Nobody ever died from X" (sometimes this sentence is hilariously and obviously wrong, such as when X was 'getting drafted' or 'starving to death')
"I blame Obama" (Obama was the nickname we gave to our space heater for no reason, and at one point it began malfunctioning and giving everybody sore throats, and when we finally figured out why we were sick this became a catchphrase)
"Never in my life have I..." (this one works better in Hebrew)

Denmark
08-07-2013, 05:30 PM
"I blame Obama" (Obama was the nickname we gave to our space heater for no reason, and at one point it began malfunctioning and giving everybody sore throats, and when we finally figured out why we were sick this became a catchphrase)


THANKS, OBAMA.

i dunno if I have things I say a lot irl that aren't stolen from other people. i give a lot of thumbs-ups :up: to avoid having to actually form a meager sentence. i say "dang" a fair bit.

Jinx
08-07-2013, 08:41 PM
"I blame Obama" (Obama was the nickname we gave to our space heater for no reason, and at one point it began malfunctioning and giving everybody sore throats, and when we finally figured out why we were sick this became a catchphrase)




THANKS, OBAMA.

i dunno if I have things I say a lot irl that aren't stolen from other people. i give a lot of thumbs-ups :up: to avoid having to actually form a meager sentence. i say "dang" a fair bit.

I have never once heard you say dang.

Yerushalmi
08-07-2013, 08:48 PM
Oh, another two of my catchprases:
"Your choice, my friend."
"Thank you so much. Thank you so much."

Denmark
08-07-2013, 08:56 PM
"I blame Obama" (Obama was the nickname we gave to our space heater for no reason, and at one point it began malfunctioning and giving everybody sore throats, and when we finally figured out why we were sick this became a catchphrase)




THANKS, OBAMA.

i dunno if I have things I say a lot irl that aren't stolen from other people. i give a lot of thumbs-ups :up: to avoid having to actually form a meager sentence. i say "dang" a fair bit.

I have never once heard you say dang.

dang i guess i swear too much for reals around you then. or maybe i just say it on the internet.

Synoptikal
08-08-2013, 02:07 PM
"Could be worse. You could be on fire."

Jinx
08-08-2013, 04:07 PM
I realized when I was in the car with Denmark last night--whenever I say something that's inappropriate, I will follow it with: "Yeah I just threw out/dropped a --"

Yar
08-10-2013, 04:41 AM
"Yeah, well [person's name] can suck my dick."

I use this really often. Even moreso when I'm intoxicated.

Huckleberry Quin
08-10-2013, 04:54 AM
"But I took it out of the shell!"

Yerushalmi
08-10-2013, 08:08 PM
"Maybe you're pregnant" - said in response to virtually anything anybody (male or female) says about their current or recent physical or mental state.

Formalhaut
08-10-2013, 08:17 PM
Common catchphrases, or just phrases, that I say All.The.Time.

"Oh for Gods sake" - Said all the time.

"Oh well." - Said all the time when a problem has arisen, and often when the problem does bother me but I try and mask it.

"Eh?" - Said frequently when I either didn't quite hear the person, didn't understand what they are saying or completely bewildered.

"Haven't a clue" - Don't know.

"But what do I know?"
"Don't take my word as gospel"
"I'm hardly an expert, but"
"I'm abit of an idiot, so I could be wrong" - All three are variations of "I'm a bit thick, so don't take my word as gospel"

Lionblade
08-11-2013, 12:03 AM
"Tease it. Teeeeease iiiit...."

[In response to "Where does this go?"] "Up your butt."

Synoptikal
08-12-2013, 07:09 AM
"...Whut?" I say it like that instead of "What?!" or "Eh?!" for conveying disbelief.

Mercen-X
08-14-2013, 12:36 AM
Respondez: "Twelve!"
This is partially motivated by the need to annoy and partially a need to postpone answering the question as sometimes I need time to consider while sometimes I just wasn't listening.

Mercen-X
08-17-2013, 05:35 PM
"Words..!"
1) When I've had a hard time hearing someone say something
2) When someone is having a hard time saying something
3) When I'm having a hard time saying something

Heath
08-18-2013, 06:42 PM
"I'm sorry, you'll have to ask somebody else as that's not my job."

I kid, I kid. Though sometimes I wish it was my catchphrase!

I say "to be honest," an awful lot, which I always worry makes everything else I say (which, to be fair, might only be about every second sentence in which I don't use that phrase) seem disingenuous.

Calliope
08-18-2013, 11:30 PM
"What a pack of clowns!"

"It's a bloody barrel of monkeys!"

"I'm hungry/make me a sandwich/I'm cold/I'm dying"

"SHAZZAM!"

Unbreakable Will
08-19-2013, 12:24 AM
I say "Much obliged" a lot at work. And as for more common ones; "smurf you", "What's up fool", "Douche McGoosh"

Mo-Nercy
08-25-2013, 05:37 AM
Smurfstick.

Captain Maxx Power
08-25-2013, 03:40 PM
Some jerk I knew used to go on about something stupid regarding pirates. No idea what happened to him.