View Full Version : The Plight the Fat Chocobo

01-17-2014, 04:14 AM
So okay, hear me out.

You live in the chocobo forest hiding from all the other chocobos (I can only assume you were socially ostracized from an early age). You spend the majority of your life dwelling in the deepest recesses of the Chocobo wood, to such an extent that the entrance to your abode is thick with your own BO. You spend your days wondering in futility when a merciful end will come to your immeasurable loneliness, when in the distance you smell something... bitter, yet mouthwatering.

Could this be a dream? Is that scent you smell of the legendary Gyshal Greens?

Memories of your sweet late mother rush through your head, as you recount the bedside fables she would tell you of cuisine only the most elite of chocobos, the legendary champions which reside in the Feymarch, are allowed to partake in. Every night, once your sweet mam would nuzzle an affectionate beak on your then youthful nape, you would drift into the dreaming with the very pungent odor filling your nostrils as it does now.

Courage swells in your chest once more, as you decide to emancipate yourself from this abode, and inquire as to what could be the source of such a wonderful scent.

Hark! Could this be? A fair summoner, hair green as spring fresh with dew, has called YOU forth. Why would such a beautiful maiden call you forth? You are no chocobo of the Feymarch; indeed, of all legends you could only recall a couple chocobos of enormous girth to have been the ally of warriors, but such birds were few and far between.

Well then, if she has not summoned you for aid in combat, of what manner an audience did she seek with you? Oh! Mayhap she tires from her journey, and wish to wait a spell in your forest to rejuvenate your spirit! What manner of entertainment shall the two of you engage in? Perhaps you and she will engage in song, eliciting the tales of grand adventure and peril she has fought through with her companions. Or, perhaps she can summon a minor Eidolon (http://finalfantasy.wikia.com/wiki/Whyt) of her own, and you will all play in the safety of the forest.

At the prospect of a new friend you begin to smile with glee! Finally an end to the loneliness that you could only escape in the depths of the Dreaming!

Your joy is cut short, however, when the summoners companions approach you. Bag after bag of equipment, swords, staves, bows, boots, all of the adventurers belongings are forcefully shoved down your gullet. You wish for them to stop, but wishing does nothing to hinder the whims of men.

Time passes and the horror ends. However, they will be back.

You know they will return.

You can feel a metric ton of indigestible material settle in your stomach. You know your biology will not allow it to pass through your system, and the only hope of regurgitation is with the aid of these travelers. You know that, at the very least, there will come a time when they will come back to retrieve their wares.

At the very least, you hope they return.

It is not your current state that is the source of this hope.

It was her eyes.

The gaze of the Lady of the Feymarch. You are not sure, but you felt a... kindness from her eyes. A thankfulness. You decide to answer her future call for those eyes, filled with gratitude.

Lest you believe she broke your heart, and succumb to despair.

Holy crap, I did not mean to write a narrative, I originally typed this thread so that we could discuss how awful life must be for the fat chocobo in FFIV. As you can see, I got carried away. If this needs to be moved to the writer's corner or something, I'd understand :p.

Anyway TL;DR, the Fat Chocobo lives a lonely life, and his only purpose is to serve as the party's inventory storage. Discuss.

01-20-2014, 05:50 AM
Jeez, I hope I didn't depress everyone away from commenting...

01-20-2014, 08:03 AM
It was pretty depressing! :lol:

I think the Fat Chocobo loves to eat things - even weapons - and the party helps him out by giving him a ton of free weapons and then he has the benefit of enjoying the taste but doesn't put on any weight because he swiftly brings them back up again.

01-20-2014, 05:10 PM
I will never play Final Fantasy IV again.

01-20-2014, 10:03 PM
Well, damn. My tongue-in-cheek look at the existential crisis of a large avian has caused way more tears of sadness than tears of joy. Fear not Kalevala, for there is always the DS version!

Anyway, I like Psychotic's interpretation a lot more than mine.