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View Full Version : The Sausage Roll UBERTHREAD 2k14



Parker
04-03-2014, 10:58 PM
ok guys its that time of year where we think and talk about sausage rolls.


sausage rolls are tubes of sausage meat encased in pastry and are a particularly british thing to eat (I think). they are a working-man's lunch staple. the middle classes adore them in a picnic with other finger foods cut into manageable sizes, sitting on blankets in the spring time. the upper classes don't know what they are, and fear them. that's why they live in big houses with high walls, to block out the sausage.

today, just now in fact, i had to go to the store to pick up some essentials. the guy gave me two (2) free sausage rolls!!!!

they have been under a heat lamp in the store next to the cigarettes for probably 18 hours or more. they're disgusting but satisfying. the paper bag he put them in was translucent with grease in the 4 minutes or so it took me to take them home. wonderful stuff. disgusting and awful but somehow wonderful. i am filled with joy right now.

This is the Sausage Roll Uberthread for 2014. Do you like sausage rolls? Do you hate sausage rolls? What are your favourite brands? Have you ever made your own?


SAUSAGE ROLL CHAT ONLY. NO HATERS.

noxious.sunshine
04-04-2014, 02:50 AM
That sounds so Southern redneck trailer park it's ridiculous.

I'm good on that one. :D

blackmage_nuke
04-04-2014, 08:14 AM
The only bakery good I like more than a meat pie is a sausage roll. I dont like it when they come in a plastic wrapper thing. Those tend to have a bad sausage to pastry ratio.

Psychotic
04-04-2014, 08:20 AM
The true question is not "Do you like sausage rolls?" it is "Do you like sausage rolls hot or cold?" to which the answer is of course both.

Iceglow
04-04-2014, 01:42 PM
Sausage rolls are better heated than cold but hell yeah Sausage Rolls are a meaty lunchtime heaven!

Parker
04-04-2014, 03:51 PM
i remember they'd microwave the ones in schoolif you asked from them hot. a limp soggy delicious treat

Shauna
04-04-2014, 06:04 PM
I like them better hot, not a fan of how the grease goes all congealed and ick.

Rantz
04-04-2014, 06:07 PM
I've never had them but they sound yummy.

DK
04-04-2014, 06:21 PM
The food van that used to come to my old workplace at break time had the best sausage rolls ever. Nice flaky pastry, greasy filth soft sausage meat served hot. God damn I would kill for one right now. You better believe I got one every day.

That being said I love 'em any which way. Asda pack of 6 for £1 sheer filth rolls, straight out the fridge, at least 3 in one sitting otherwise you're left with nothing but a sense of depression.

Iceglow
04-04-2014, 07:21 PM
Give it a dip in some ketchup and those sheer filth rolls would be just fine right about now. In fact this talk of sausage rolls makes me want some!

Parker
04-04-2014, 09:24 PM
It's a shame 90% of store-bought sausage rolls are pretty bad. They're still great, but bad.

fuck ginsters forever

Psychotic
04-04-2014, 09:26 PM
I was once in Carlisle for a day and I went into Greggs to buy a sausage roll before my journey home... they didn't have a smurfing clue what a sausage roll was. The north is a smurfed up place.

Parker
04-04-2014, 09:31 PM
wtf. you'd think carlisle would be all over the sausage roll. messed up priotirites imo

Shauna
04-04-2014, 09:31 PM
Wow. That must be a depressing place to live. :(

Big D
04-05-2014, 12:17 AM
Can't beat a big, hot sausage roll. Especially one that's been spruced up with cheese and chilli.

And for the vegetarians, there's the option of spinach and ricotta filling. I'm not vegetarian, but I still go for this type of roll now and then.

Kalevala
04-05-2014, 12:19 AM
Y'all are gross.

Shauna
04-05-2014, 11:46 AM
Y'all are gross.

Are you saying... you don't like sausage rolls?

Iceglow
04-05-2014, 12:18 PM
Y'all are gross.

Are you saying... you don't like sausage rolls?

I knew we reversed his name change from April Fool's too soon.

Kalevala
04-05-2014, 04:48 PM
Hey now, being a sausage hater and a cat lover are two different... things... oh. :|

Jess
04-06-2014, 03:46 PM
I love a good sausage roll.

Don't be mad but I'm not a huge fan of Gregg's sausage roll! I'm not saying I wouldn't eat one (I would) but give me a homemade, hot, non-greasy non-gritty, good quality sausage, sausage roll any day.

Parker
04-06-2014, 04:03 PM
what is wrong with you

Ayen
04-06-2014, 04:10 PM
I've never had them but they sound yummy.

Me neither. As a matter of fact I can't recall the last time I had sausage in general.

What have we done to deserve such cruel and unusual punishment? To be denied the sweet, sweet taste of sausage rolls? Why, God, why!? TELL ME WHY?!

Iceglow
04-07-2014, 01:25 AM
Born outside the motherland?

Ayen
04-07-2014, 03:03 AM
Born outside the motherland?

Yes T_T

Iceglow
04-07-2014, 12:47 PM
Sucks to be born in the USA doesn't it? :P

Ayen
04-07-2014, 01:41 PM
Sucks to be born in the USA doesn't it? :P

Kinda sorta.

Jiro
04-08-2014, 08:41 AM
Sausage rolls are great. Gotta be up there with the true blue aussie foods.

DK
04-08-2014, 03:21 PM
I do not approve of the poncery mentioned in this thread. Cheese? Chilli? All fine in their own rights, but they belong nowhere near a Sausage roll. Pastry, Sausage, done. :colbert:

Shauna
04-08-2014, 03:24 PM
Pastry, questionable meat product, done.

Psychotic
04-08-2014, 03:29 PM
I do not approve of the poncery mentioned in this thread. Cheese? Chilli? All fine in their own rights, but they belong nowhere near a Sausage roll. Pastry, Sausage, done. :colbert:
Indeed. What has the world come to when we cannot enjoy the humble sausage roll for what it is?

Kalevala
04-08-2014, 10:25 PM
The closest things I've had to a sausage roll are pigs in a blanket and monkey bread.

Parker
04-08-2014, 10:27 PM
i dont want to change the topic too much (this is the sausage roll uberthread after all) but sausage wrapped in bacon is fucking divine

Iceglow
04-09-2014, 12:34 AM
None of these fucking fancy bloody sausages either. As Shauna put it we only want the most questionable pure filth sausage there is!

Still I'm hoping Paul and Parks enjoyed the picture of that sweating pair of pastry wrapped filth love parcels I snapped to them the other day!

Parker
04-09-2014, 01:37 AM
i did not receive this

Iceglow
04-09-2014, 12:06 PM
Well there goes the biggest appreciator of questionable meaty goods I know of.

Parker
04-09-2014, 01:06 PM
i received it!

i was jealous

Psychotic
04-09-2014, 07:01 PM
i dont want to change the topic too much (this is the sausage roll uberthread after all) but sausage wrapped in bacon is fucking divine:up:

Psychotic
04-09-2014, 08:15 PM
Sugar on sausages?

Parker
04-09-2014, 09:50 PM
that does sound good actually i guess idk i would have to try it lets try it psy

Psychotic
04-09-2014, 10:44 PM
Yeah I'm curious. About many things, as it happens, but right now mostly about this sugar sausages business.

Parker
04-09-2014, 11:17 PM
im gonna try this for easter and if it goes badly ur dead

Parker
04-09-2014, 11:23 PM
yes, among other things ;)

Iceglow
04-10-2014, 12:03 AM
Hahaha Jinx, post the recipe here. I might just have to make the most unholy of holy trinities...

Sausage roll using caramelized pigs in blankets!