Let's Play Live A Live

[Brennan]

Hey guys! I have to admit, it's been an awful long time since I've been on this forum (what, with school, work, significant others...), but I'm back, and I'm bringing you a let's play on a game that (hopefully) no one is doing yet!


This game is...
http://i.imgur.com/rCciKt8.jpg?1

To those of you who don't know what Live A Live is, it was a game released by Square on the Super Famicom back in 1994 as a Japan-exclusive game. A lovely group of translator's found this game, and decided to modify it's data so that it reads in English sometime in the 2000's. Here's a link to a wikipedia article because it explains more than I could: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Live_A_Live

Truthfully speaking, I've never taken much time out of my day to try playing the game, but maybe if I do it as a Let's Play I'll be able to give it a shot.




Anywho, Live A Live is not just one story but seven in one! The game starts out by letting you choose the first scenario you want to play through.

You can be either...

http://i.imgur.com/ltPPSm7.jpg
A pink-haired Ryu Hayabusa!

http://i.imgur.com/eqqtaD8.jpg
Master Roshi!

http://i.imgur.com/VX2eQS4.jpg
A sci-fi (possibly steampunk?) Kirby!

http://i.imgur.com/5NiEpp3.jpg
Teenaged Rocky Balboa!

http://i.imgur.com/w6rf25F.jpg
John Wayne Marston!

http://i.imgur.com/WwmDghy.jpg
Barney Rubble's green-haired cousin?

http://i.imgur.com/t6r7jjs.jpg
And Robo's humanoid cousin?


Okay, maybe I ran out of ideas for the last two, but who cares?

So, tomorrow, we start our seven scenario'd story. There is no set time that the series will be updated, so there may be a span of a few days before I am able to post a good, sizable update to our story.


If anyone has commentary, like what order I should start playing the stories in, any questions about how I'm playing this game, or anything at all, please ask! If no one has any objections to what story they would like to see first, then I'll just choose one for continuity's sake.

See you guys when the next update's ready!

[Psychotic]

Cowboy! COWBOY! COWBOY!

[DK]

been ages since i played this game but I seem to remember the wrestler and scifi story being difficult as shit. possibly the cowboy one as well.

that being said, i agree, cowboy

[Brennan]

Thus, we start our story with the cowboy!

http://i.imgur.com/t21nH7K.jpg

http://i.imgur.com/4ZvosfD.jpg

http://i.imgur.com/q5laEQG.jpg
A bandit clan named "the Crazy Bunch?" Very unique. Much classic.

Anywho, our cowboy gives us a proper sendoff by shooting and blowing the smoke off of his gun, and away we go!
http://i.imgur.com/vll562l.jpg

http://i.imgur.com/ZSA5TQh.jpg
And so, the game drops us in an unknown, stereotypical town from the old western days. With a sheriff's office and a bar! Neat.

A lone sheriff leaves the office, and waltz right on over to the bar.

http://i.imgur.com/FtCW5uE.jpg
Barman: "Howdy, sheriff."
Sheriff: "Put up this here poster."
Barman: "Whose this here feller?"

http://i.imgur.com/l1LsJdV.jpg
And, thus, we get to name our character! Sundown doesn't seem to be too badass of a name, so let's change it to...


http://i.imgur.com/1G2EVH8.jpg
Fuck. Only six character limit? But Sundown's seven characters! What the fuuuuu--game logic--uuuuuck?

Note to all of those who care: I had to restart the intro sequence to get "Sundown" back. You all should be happy we're not playing as Sundow.

JUMPCUT!

http://i.imgur.com/OHYypXq.jpg
Thus, we meet our hero on horseback. Our John Wayne of the Japanese Super Nintendo era. Probably not, but he's all I know on this emulator system.

http://i.imgur.com/eAMzTNY.jpg
A CHALLENGER APPROACHES.

http://i.imgur.com/oqLEUwP.jpg
TRAINER WILD WEST USES PURPLE-CLAD STRANGER.

http://i.imgur.com/KHZMgY8.jpg
Apparently, the purple-clad stranger isn't just any stranger. His name is Mad Dog. And he wants to kill the Sundown Kid for whatever unknown reason he may have...

http://i.imgur.com/g9FEjVp.jpg
...Which leads us to our first battle!
To summarize the battle mechanics; each characters move in free-time across a grid-like battlefield. When the A button is pressed, a menu comes up asking what actions you would like to perform. Different actions can travel up to so many grid-spaces, and some can only be done from a cardinal direction, etc. It's not all that complicated when you know how to work it.

After shooting him in the face once or twice, Mr Mad Dog drops like a hot potato.
http://i.imgur.com/VId43cB.jpg
RIGHT OOOOOON!

http://i.imgur.com/FqOO5h0.jpg
...But he's still alive, so Sundown shoots Mad Dog's horse to scare it away, and rides off, leaving Mad Dog in his dust...

http://i.imgur.com/d7doun6.jpg
...Until he travels 50 feet away from Mad Dog and spots a town.
Literally, Mad Dog can probably see the town from where he's at. He probably won't follow you or anything.

http://i.imgur.com/CZPG4Lz.jpg
Wandering 50 feet to the nearest town, most like.

http://i.imgur.com/g0cNfD3.jpg
To conclude this installment of the let's play, we end at the town. Sundown dismounts his horse, and sets off to find the source of the horrible music that's totally coming from the bar.

See you next time!

[Psychotic]

Mad Dog! Success Town! Crazy Bunch! Sundown! This is the best game ever!

[Brennan]

This is the best game ever!
Indeed, good sir!

Last time, we have just entered this quaint little town! Time to steal all of their precious goodies----

http://i.imgur.com/TjE6Lb5.jpg
...trout.

Every door's locked. Every. Single. One.
The thief inside of me is disappoint.

http://i.imgur.com/tKQ9SM0.jpg
Guess there's no way they can lock these saloon doors, eh?

By the way, the game shows the doors swing for a good 5 seconds after Sundown goes through the doors. It's almost painful.

Inside, I'm met with all the inhabitants of the town. For some odd reason, they all get really quiet.

http://i.imgur.com/6qQHRlg.jpg
Rude bastards.

http://i.imgur.com/BoFo7gR.jpg
Nevermind! These people are actually kind of nice! Guess they're shy.

http://i.imgur.com/RiytHUI.jpg
I take it back. This guy's comes up acting like a dick. Great. My seat now, bitch!

http://i.imgur.com/L2vRC2J.jpg
Then this hot chick shows up, giving every male in the room some excitement for the night. At least 'til dickface gives her the worst compliment that I've ever heard...

http://i.imgur.com/wGuESxt.jpg
...That hot girl just smacked the trout out of that guy.
I'd let her smack me all night :smug:

http://i.imgur.com/sDLeXzb.jpg
Then this kid comes out of nowhere. Get out of here before that man throws you right into me.

http://i.imgur.com/YFP17W4.jpg
That kid moved me two spaces to the left. I swear I'm going to beat him.

http://i.imgur.com/7b9LMI1.jpg
The kid threw himself.
Like I'm about to throw myself on Annie :smug:

So, the man offered to buy me a drink! Guess he's an alright guy after all...


http://i.imgur.com/20kDfBj.jpg
Mothersmurfer got me milk. Return to sender.

http://i.imgur.com/I4ybfPK.jpg
That's right. I don't drink milk...

http://i.imgur.com/smGXUk2.jpg
...This guy WANTS to get shot.

Alright, bring it!

http://i.imgur.com/K6L9uIg.jpg
I'm fighting a hillbilly?

http://i.imgur.com/kAWupnd.jpg
DOUBLE TAP

http://i.imgur.com/xmGpM7z.jpg
Body count: 2

Everyone is teh shocked when they watched me paint the saloon's floor with the brain of some man that they all hated.
Until...

http://i.imgur.com/LVYI3ht.jpg
Mr Sheriff himself decided to finally come into the saloon after hearing a kid crash through a couple of chairs and a few gunshots.

Yet there is someone else who is coming...

http://i.imgur.com/cu65DEW.jpg
A CHALLENGER APPROACHES!

http://i.imgur.com/DzHMxpA.jpg
Mad Dog? I thought you would have died out in the desert by your lonesome. Now I have to lower my body count to 1. Dammit!
And why are you trying to tell everyone my name? There's a poster. Right there. With my face AND name on it. Are you trying to tell me that everyone in here is can't tell that I look just like I do on that poster?

Well, I was wrong. Apparently no one could tell I was the Sundown Kid. Really? No wonder a hillbilly was terrorizing all of y'all.

But what does Mad Dog want with me now? Did he survive two gunshot wounds to the face to...?

http://i.imgur.com/vhwJGpE.jpg
...You gotta be kidding me. I already won last time! Damn it.

http://i.imgur.com/wY4VtZf.jpg
So, we're gonna do this? Okay.

http://i.imgur.com/M0eLvar.jpg
I got until the count of five. Then I'll go in, guns blazing. Maybe I'll be able to get in the first shot... How long as it been?

http://i.imgur.com/7ubov5t.jpg
Crapcrapcrapcrapcrapcrapcrapcrapcrapcrapcrap!

http://i.imgur.com/mhpeA8P.jpg
Why did I shoot so early? trout! I can't work under stress like this...!
But, wait, Mad Dog shot too early, too! It's funny, why did he shoot in the same direction that I did?

http://i.imgur.com/4y2MIM3.jpg
What is the name of almighty John Wayne is that noise? What makes a "grafghth" noise?

http://i.imgur.com/4cxOgCZ.jpg
Whoa. Totally meant to do that! Totez mcgoatz.

So, it seems the Crazy Bunch are out to get this town. Guess I should gather my things and...
Join Mad Dog and kill them all? Seems legit!

So, in the next episode, we gather things so that we can kill all of the crazy people in the Crazy Bunch! How exciting!

[Brennan]

So, when we left our hero, he was left with the knowledge that the notorious clan named the "Crazy Bunch" were going to attack Success Town.

Armed with that knowledge, our hero prepares to do battle!

http://i.imgur.com/N8napex.jpg
"...we'll give you the town's supply of gold!"
I suppose it doesn't hurt to make a troutton of money while shooting a few baddies, eh?


Basic pillaging at the bar leads to finding...
http://i.imgur.com/9PzAU4V.jpg
Bourbon that heals all of your wounds. Guess my uncle wasn't lying when he said whiskey heals all wounds.


When we speak to Mad Dog, he has a revelation.
http://i.imgur.com/Jjk0Lz1.jpg
"...How about me and you, arch enemies, come together to fight off a band of thugs to save this town out of the goodness of our souls?"
Ballin.

http://i.imgur.com/eY0xqSb.jpg

http://i.imgur.com/o0PANyK.jpg
And for some reason, the sheriff's son feels the need to pilfer his badge and give it to the Sundown Kid. For some reason, I have a feeling this kid's gonna grow to have major trust issues later in life.

http://i.imgur.com/kLWA9IF.jpg
"Listen--everyone. In order for us to help, we have to have unrestricted access to all of your homes. And just in case that this flaw in logic doesn't raise suspicion..."

http://i.imgur.com/H48JOWu.jpg
"...Let's heap on a hefty dose of breaking the fourth-wall."

Now, let's describe the gameplay for this bit. You play, still, as the Sundown Kid. This time, however, you have the company of Mad Dog; the guy who tried to kill you just 10 minutes ago is currently your most reliable ally.

Party dysfunction aside, you and Mad Dog travel building to building seeking out supplies on a limited time schedule. Every so many minutes, a bell tolls...
http://i.imgur.com/AGo3RJ6.jpg
...Which puts you a little closer to the final boss encounter of this scenario. There will be eight bell tolls in all that signify how long you have until Dio and his storm-cowboys will try to destroy the republic of Success Town.

Mad Dog also has this cool feature in which he can mix oil and empty bottles to make Molotovs.
http://i.imgur.com/iUj8QoT.jpg
Wonder where he picked up that trade and why he didn't use it in our first battle NO ONE CARES.


Instead of showing every item picked up, I'll just show a few screenshots of some of the weirder things that I've found.

http://i.imgur.com/F5ljf9h.jpg
JACKPOT!

http://i.imgur.com/kWVXxIm.jpg
...No.

Heading over to Annie's room and trying to search her dressers will show the following...
http://i.imgur.com/KdYrfCD.jpg
"Sorry, Ms. I was just trying to figure out a way to implement these double-launching slingshots that we found in your dresser."

http://i.imgur.com/0sXCDpj.jpg

http://i.imgur.com/wxjjn3Q.jpg

Notable Findings: Horse dung. I trout you not (no pun intended).

As soon as the Sundown Kid and Snoop Dog find all of the materials that they need, they return to the hideout to see everyone eagerly awaiting command.
http://i.imgur.com/ODpEEs6.jpg
The secret to this part of the preparation is to know who is the fastest and who is the slowest worker out of all the members of the town. As there is some sexism and ageism hidden in the cracks of the game, there will be items that only certain people will be able to use.

http://i.imgur.com/f8dmbuh.jpg
Subtle, Square.

Anywho, after giving most of the people an individual job to do (or two), time will creep on until the eighth bell tolls, and then you'll be treated to a scene showing the fruits of the town people's labors.

http://i.imgur.com/s5kgWFa.jpg
Pitfalls forming...

http://i.imgur.com/w7NSNzv.jpg
Our strong-willed woman in question, scoring a headshot on one of Dio's men. This is the best part of this entire story. A woman throwing a frying pan in the ultimate act of sexism.

But a few of the people who stormed Success Town survived. With one voice booming, "You have until the count of ten..."
http://i.imgur.com/cZvmRmN.jpg

Will our unlikely hero's survive the onslaught of Dio and his men? Find out in the next part of our adventure, which will involve...

http://cdn.theatlantic.com/static/newsroom/img/mag/2011/09/winkler/lead.jpg?n1926s
Guns!

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-8lQs_1XLRfM/UGnFH5uhM4I/AAAAAAAACS8/9qAS0Ic8jaE/s1600/Detail-Game-Call-of-Juarez-Bound-in-Blood.jpg
Duels!

http://nickknowlespt.files.wordpress.com/2014/06/tumblr_lz4izkrstb1r46py4o1_500.jpg
Unlikely bodybuilders!

And the ending of one of seven scenarios!

[Ayen]

Looks like a fun game.

I vote you play wrestler next. Wrestler! *piledrivers*

[Brennan]

I'll be honest, I'm not quite sure that I'm conveying the gameplay all that well, it's a different experience than it seems when you actually play it! Not sure if you played it before, but I recommend it for a new experience!

[Psychotic]

Turn the bar into a beehive? What does that even...?

[Brennan]

Turn the bar into a beehive? What does that even...?

I not know what that even.

Last time we left our cowboys, they were being threatened to leave, 'less they are given hives from bees. And they step outside to face the infamous Ronnie James.

http://i.imgur.com/BM4gtlN.jpg (http://imgur.com/BM4gtlN)

Sundown: "Howdy, padna."
Dio: "Y'all finally came out eh? Now it's time to see how y'all fare..."
Mad Dog: "Say, stranger, why you look like that Cid feller from FFIV?"

http://i.imgur.com/dNQdveH.jpg (http://imgur.com/dNQdveH)

Sundown: "Ain't that a little heavy for a regular man to carry? How a man like you supposed to...?"
Dio: "Ain't you know that I've been into heavy metal since the 80's? :lol:"

OOC: I know that my jokes are terrible and getting old fast, but spoiler alert! It's not getting old!













Dio: "Why y'all ain't laughing?!"
Mad Dog: "The hell are the 80's?"
Dio: "...I'm gonna turn all o'y'all into beehives."

-BATTLE TIME-

http://i.imgur.com/tKlQedE.jpg (http://imgur.com/tKlQedE)

Sundown: "HOLY trout! We done pissed off one of them there 'roid monkeys!"

Dio's battle isn't too hard for a "final" battle. You just have to make sure to kill all of his subordinates before you trying to tackle the main man himself.
ALSO: Stay away from the four diagonal directions from Dio's sprite. Guy's got a nasty attack that's a OHKO everytime.

It's pretty easy to kill all of the lackey's. Just try to save your Molotov cocktails and dynamite for Ronnie James up there.

After a little while, Sundown and Mad Dog end up facing the macho maniac all by theirselves.

http://i.imgur.com/OtKXARh.jpg (http://imgur.com/OtKXARh)

Now all that's left is to throw what's left of the Molotovs and dynamite at Dio. If that doesn't kill him, then a few special shots from both Sundown and Mad Dog will finish off this bandit tyrant.

http://i.imgur.com/Ty59g9d.jpg (http://imgur.com/Ty59g9d)
...Although I managed to let Mad Dog get Gatling gun'd twice. Oh well, he just took up space anyway.

http://i.imgur.com/xgtrmy0.jpg (http://imgur.com/xgtrmy0)
After filling him with more lead than a human body has the capacity to hold, Mad Dog seems to still be attached to the land of the living.
Oh, and Dio turned into a horse, cause that's a thing.

http://i.imgur.com/0GEJPQk.jpg (http://imgur.com/0GEJPQk)
The question of all time. Although there was some exposition on how some people shot some other people in a war and spared some horse that held in all the dead people's anger. I'm not sure how that works, either.

http://i.imgur.com/ALC8AnG.jpg (http://imgur.com/ALC8AnG)
Sundown: "Bro, we just spent all night coming together with stuff to kill this guy. Can it wait until later?"
Mad Dog: "Nope, I'm a punctual mothersmurfer."

And the duel proceeds, until.

http://i.imgur.com/EgDFVEp.jpg (http://imgur.com/EgDFVEp)

http://i.imgur.com/n7DI7SA.jpg (http://imgur.com/n7DI7SA)

The actual last battle of Sundown's scenario.
Mad Dog's pathetically easy, especially considering Dio's battle beforehand. He just takes one more attack than the first time we fought him.

At the end of that battle, Sundown decides to leave Success Town, much to everyone's acceptance. Although everyone's happy, they have a confession to make.
All that money they promised Sundown? They don't have it.

http://i.imgur.com/Ak8SVtT.jpg (http://imgur.com/Ak8SVtT)

There's no "No," button. Damn it.

Sundown: "It's fine, I learned to care for people less fortunate than I! YEEHAW!"

http://i.imgur.com/rqHHiNo.jpg (http://imgur.com/rqHHiNo)

If it sounds like that ending was way shorter than it actually is, you're right. But I just gave the gist of it, anyway.
And thus ends our cowboy's adventure.

Be back next time for...

Hardcore.

Fake.

http://i.imgur.com/U7X1nqV.jpg

WRESTLING!

[Psychotic]

Giant Incredible Hulk with Minigun. In the Wild West. Well. That sure was A Thing.

[Brennan]

Due to Sundown's scenario being over, we start into a brand new story with...

http://i.imgur.com/6QdYgs6.jpg (http://imgur.com/6QdYgs6)
Das wrestler!

Our wrestler seems to have an iron will, and will stop at nothing to become the best warrior that we've ever seen.

It's cliche as smurf.

Anywho, our scenario starts out with a training montage that's cheesy enough to bring a tear to Sylvester Stallone's eye!

http://i.imgur.com/7iSR1cT.jpg (http://imgur.com/7iSR1cT)

"TO BECOME TEH GREATEST EVAAAA!!!1!!!1!1"

And, thus, we get to name our hero.

http://i.imgur.com/AaHbLtv.jpg (http://imgur.com/AaHbLtv)

Oh smurf no. Masaru? Really?

Let's just say I got really lazy creative with naming this guy.

http://i.imgur.com/QTqOlN7.jpg (http://imgur.com/QTqOlN7)

Rocky ain't know what Rocky done got himself into, as I was sure to figure out!

http://i.imgur.com/72XwstI.jpg (http://imgur.com/72XwstI)

Oh no you smurfing don't, sir.

I guess I'll just start playing the game by looking for any items that I can find and...

http://i.imgur.com/EmUoEoE.jpg (http://imgur.com/EmUoEoE)

BWUAAAAAAAAAAH??
Wasn't this a JRPG? Since when was I playing a clone of Megaman?

Oh well, let's see, I'll fight this chick--

http://i.imgur.com/W7SH89f.jpg (http://imgur.com/W7SH89f)

--named Namcat, who used the Muay Thai style--

http://i.imgur.com/GAiEeGx.jpg (http://imgur.com/GAiEeGx)

...

Uhhhhh...

http://i.imgur.com/v46CFZc.jpg


http://i.imgur.com/z4NpmR5.jpg

THAT THING'S A GUY?

Well, I'm still gonna kick it's ass!

http://i.imgur.com/sAdEMOW.jpg (http://imgur.com/sAdEMOW)

BRING IT, PRETTY BO--

http://i.imgur.com/uglmJkW.jpg (http://imgur.com/uglmJkW)
God... Damn... It...

If this story plays out like my battle with Namcat, then I'm screwed at this point.

So, I guess I'll just tell you guys how this storyline works out.

You play as Mas-- Rocky, who is fighting to become TEH LEET warrior. Thus, you engage in battle with many "wrestlers" in the world. (I suppose fighter didn't sound good enough to the translation team. Meh.) In battle, you start with a basic punch, a battle-cry that heals a little HP and gives you strength, and a roundhouse that spins enemies around so that they can't attack you...

http://i.imgur.com/qS6Uuk6.jpg (http://imgur.com/qS6Uuk6)

...it does pitiful damage, though, and the enemy turns right back around after your turn.

But the good part is collecting skills.

Basically, when an enemy uses an unique attack, Rocky learns it. So when they use abilities that are more powerful than your own...

http://i.imgur.com/UJiwIEP.jpg (http://imgur.com/UJiwIEP)

http://i.imgur.com/VXmNXaX.jpg (http://imgur.com/VXmNXaX)

...Rocky does a spin kick and let's how a "HIYA," which means that he learned the skill. How he does so is beyond me, considering one of the kicks does so much damage that I can hear his jaw detaching from his body. But then you can then use your enemies attacks against them. Pretty neat mechanic in a game that's 20 years old!

Anywho, with some luck, persistence, and learning the crap out of where Namcat's attacks land, I managed to finally beat him down.

http://i.imgur.com/Py90k2c.jpg (http://imgur.com/Py90k2c)

Which means that I punched him into another dimension of pain and suffering from when he has put me.

So, after learning two new abilities, and breaking every bone in Namcat's pretty little face, our hero sets out to reach the next step of destroying the world with his roundhouse becoming the Arena's next grand champion becoming the ultimate warrior!

See you next time!

[Psychotic]

Revolver Ocelot and ghetto Hulk Hogan would also make good opponents.

[Brennan]

Fighting is something I can't really transcribe without video. Since I don't have a way to record video, this is going to be the dullest installment yet. :redface:
Also, not re-sizing all of these pictures so that we're not bombarded with their sheer size :P

Anyhow, let us begin...!

http://i.imgur.com/sTees8c.png
We begin with this "Great Asia" guy, who basically looks like a zombie.

http://i.imgur.com/MN6BMfS.png
He's also really friendly!

http://i.imgur.com/jixKa9Q.png
-Insert racist joke here-

http://i.imgur.com/BX5hKdj.png
Compared to Namcat, this guy is a breeze.

http://i.imgur.com/4jSvYgA.png
NEXT!

http://i.imgur.com/iEsCSoN.png
Tula Han!

http://i.imgur.com/uBWZLeJ.png
He teaches us a new ability...

http://i.imgur.com/llcYXLC.png
...That turns Rocky into a kamikaze jet. I wonder if Great Asia would be weak against this attack?

http://i.imgur.com/b4qJMsy.png
And another body hits the floor.

http://i.imgur.com/tWatsQS.png
NEXT!

http://i.imgur.com/Zs2q6R9.png
Some old guy, who teaches us the greatest skill ever, but that comes in later.

http://i.imgur.com/Qrk111i.png
He's ridiculously difficult to hit, but with some patience, he'll go down.

http://i.imgur.com/0KP68Jh.png
Depends on who I stole it from, really.

NEXT!

http://i.imgur.com/1TMo4Ke.png
Hulk Hogan?
Something tells me Square got really lazy during this story.

http://i.imgur.com/nccJ9Io.png
It's time for my secret technique that I learned from the old man!

http://i.imgur.com/yM8csCP.png
Which causes you to teleport...
http://i.imgur.com/9LdJ1LN.png
Dash back where you were, slamming into the enemy...
http://i.imgur.com/k7I3VDD.png
And turns them around for a follow-up attack.

Basically, Abise-Geri is the attack we're gonna use for the remainder of the story. Bite me.

http://i.imgur.com/EARQPMr.png
NEXT!

http://i.imgur.com/Jj7BXHp.png
Fat Bastard!

http://i.imgur.com/J7IbpQM.png
Dem tights, though.

http://i.imgur.com/EHEbLFc.png
Yoink!

http://i.imgur.com/9ySyGYy.png
No idea what he's going on about, either.

Next time, stay tuned for MOAR BATTLEZ!

With our guest...!

http://i.imgur.com/Rg0dSUy.png
....Uhhhh...
I... Dunno...?

Post-script: It's really hard to have witty any dialogue when there's nothing but battles, that's why I just put five battles in one and called it a day!

[Brennan]

Last time, we left off on an ominous image of this man...

http://i.imgur.com/Rg0dSUy.png (http://imgur.com/Rg0dSUy)

Who is he, you ask? You'll have to wait to find out!







Oh, alright, his name's...

http://i.imgur.com/M6Fy7IY.png (http://imgur.com/M6Fy7IY)

...and he's proud of it, dammit.

http://i.imgur.com/504vxja.png (http://imgur.com/504vxja)

He congratulates you before he goes into great detail about how he murdered all those people you just faced.
Dude slaughtered Namcat, I don't think Rocky's gonna make it, just sayin.

http://i.imgur.com/DglMY2J.png (http://imgur.com/DglMY2J)

Friendly with the dude-ladies, the celeb rip-offs, the old men, the young men, and the excessively overweight men. This could be my new best friend.

http://i.imgur.com/EGIbkFP.png (http://imgur.com/EGIbkFP)
Little known fact: Rocky has a mental disorder that makes him grow quite attached to the people he beat the trout out of.

http://i.imgur.com/QKVaSmk.png (http://imgur.com/QKVaSmk)
LIKE A GRAPE! THEN I'LL TIE YA TO THE RADIATOR, THEN I'M GONNA GRAPE YA.

http://i.imgur.com/qLF6oOX.png (http://imgur.com/qLF6oOX)

The ominous final battle of Rocky's story!

http://i.imgur.com/gXlRyVK.png (http://imgur.com/gXlRyVK)
Cue battle music that makes you feel like trout's goin down. This is the guy who murdered all of your best foes. Although they were the closest thing Rocky had to a family, I suppose. No one ever shown up to my matches. :/

So, how are we gonna kill this guy? He just slaughtered everyone you've ever know, Rocky. Do you have any moves that might--

http://i.imgur.com/APdGKmZ.png (http://imgur.com/APdGKmZ)
http://i.imgur.com/obfRLee.png (http://imgur.com/obfRLee)
http://i.imgur.com/c46jd4j.png (http://imgur.com/c46jd4j)

--Oh, this trout again.

Speaking of which, if this move's so powerful, then how could Odie kill the old man?

Lather, rinse, repeat, and this guy goes down without too much difficulty. I was more tense during the battle with Dio for sure.

http://i.imgur.com/6qnvjqW.png (http://imgur.com/6qnvjqW)
Betcha don't try and kill anyone again. Not even considering all the broken bones and brain damage I've given you.

http://i.imgur.com/3nw02Yg.png (http://imgur.com/3nw02Yg)

"...AND I'M DA BEST!"
http://i.imgur.com/ahLiir9.png

So now, Rocky proclaims his elitism, and proceeds to boast about how he's the ultimate badass of the world, and nothing will stop him now--

http://i.imgur.com/EPqycXU.png (http://imgur.com/EPqycXU)
http://i.imgur.com/PtPMF6A.png (http://imgur.com/PtPMF6A)

...Oh fu--

http://i.imgur.com/A0TGVNb.png (http://imgur.com/A0TGVNb)
And das da end of dat, innit Pauly? Rocky done made it to the top!

http://i.imgur.com/5yqq9ld.jpg

So, now we're left at a standstill, as I try to figure out which story I'm going to do next. Oh joy!

Until next time!

[DK]

i say caveman! get a little more traditional up in this bitch imho

[Brennan]

As we finish one story, we unearth another. And alas, the story of the caveman shall unfold!

http://i.imgur.com/OvR9mCv.png

http://i.imgur.com/ROdzZBw.png
A caveman with a good sense of smell, mind! So now we get to play as someone who has to deal with the sweaty, damp musk of the cavemen of yonder years! Swell.

http://i.imgur.com/1cuaIhK.png
Our story opens with a panning shot of this fellow, who seems downright surprised that all these people are standing behind him. Shame I can't tell what he's saying.

http://i.imgur.com/yEW7vVN.png
Seems our man is actually a mac daddio. Pimpin off his girls for rocks. And it seems Candy went missing, again.

http://i.imgur.com/qzFqwjt.png
Mac Daddio ain't happy bout dis. Keep it real fo' sho'. Hoes be trippin.

http://i.imgur.com/8jLCCXg.png

Little ol Miss Candy herself, escaping from her latest bout of bondage, I bet.

http://i.imgur.com/lbfI1xE.png
The oil helps her slip right out of her rope, though.

http://i.imgur.com/ParbkH0.png
Candy looks back, before running away from her past life as someone's broad.

http://i.imgur.com/qDP3LPt.png
"This pile of rope smells like attempted rape and disappointed parents. I MUST TELL MAC DADDIO."

Which leads to everyone running into the cave far left, and emerging in their batmobiles.

http://i.imgur.com/0BiBlXF.png
"CAN'T ESCAPE THE RAPE TRAIN, BABEH!"

Cut to this--

http://i.imgur.com/UEpA13j.png
Aw, an elephant! I wonder what he's running from...

http://i.imgur.com/X5U1vim.png
...Oh. Cavemen. Stereotypical.

They chase the elephant around until...

http://i.imgur.com/P0v1bdG.png
...they piss off a herd of them.

http://i.imgur.com/IUcUpJu.png
Chapter card...? Is that what it's called? I dunno.

http://i.imgur.com/GMI0xTm.png

And we cut to our hero, Pogo, sleeping next to his friend, Gori. After waking up Gori (by popping his nose bubble. Gross), he wordlessly follows you around. Almost creepy, if the game didn't warn us that there would be little to no dialogue in the game (not pictured, don't care.)

http://i.imgur.com/dkUlKlO.png
A little later, we find this old dwarf-lookin thing, who brightly proclaims to us through picture that he's going to go get some food.

http://i.imgur.com/mZo9nkt.png
We find this gentleman, who asks for a stick and a stone, giving them to him creates...

http://i.imgur.com/4QIFd50.png
Dis hammar that goes bonk.

Now, before I go any further, I'm gonna show you all in the menu screen what kind of characters we're dealing with right now.

http://i.imgur.com/Pf3Kgqn.png
We have our hero, Pogo, who looks like a green-haired midget who's also holding the remains of a t-bone steak.

Then there's Gori. Who looks like he's full of nope. Especially if you would see him down Nope alley in Nopesville in the state of Nopeica which is under the Nopited Nopes of Noperica.

Pogo's weird, Gori's ugly as smurf.

Moving on!

http://i.imgur.com/UYV0bGp.png
We head outside, where the old man makes a caveman go into the wild, sniff out an elk or something, follows the dust cloud that appears when he sniffs (that cloud in the southern portion of the screenshot), and come back with a chunk of meat.

http://i.imgur.com/SKG6h74.png
The old man then proceeds to roundhouse Pogo and Gori outside of the gate, with no reason other then proclaiming a big picture of the "Y" button.

Why "Y?" What are we gonna do with Y that's so...

http://i.imgur.com/WBtTADx.png
...Uh. An inflated nose? That's weird.

Basically, pressing Y on the SNES controller will make the characters sniff. They smell different characters and animals, which are revealed when you walk into a cloud of scent.

http://i.imgur.com/qARbqjK.png
Then, you follow the scent trails until you run into a battle with...

http://i.imgur.com/YxcWodS.png
Oh, God no! Wait until PETA hears about this! And they're cute! D:

http://i.imgur.com/OlhNqYt.png
Pogo, being the neanderthal that he is, takes what I imagine to be a leg portion of the dog "just in case."

After traveling, killing more packs of puppies than dog-fighting history, and questioning what I was doing with my life, I managed to find what I was looking for.

http://i.imgur.com/huccxhs.png
"There you are. Come to daddy."

The Synthor-whatsitcalled gets dropped like a bad habit, and we travel back to the old man.

http://i.imgur.com/8acDhvN.png
Who decided to let us back in. Glory!

http://i.imgur.com/oje5NCr.png
...Where the hell is everyone?

I literally searched the entire place for ten minutes before I found these guys.

http://i.imgur.com/CJTo5LS.png

So, Pogo and Gori decide to go to bed! I hope they sleep sound and...

http://i.imgur.com/m0Qbdp5.png
...Gori? Where are you?

Will Pogo find Gori? Will Candy ever escape her forceful sugar daddy? Find out, next time!