Would you kiss Iceglow if every time you did so someone, somewhere, had a perfect lif

[Madame Adequate]

e from that point forwards?

[escobert]

No! Then I would have to hear a long winded speech about about only god knows what by him.

[Night Fury]

I mean kissing isn't a big deal, so if it could give someone a perfect life then maybe. But of course, I'd never hear the end from him about how I kissed him because I couldn't resist his cockney charm or something so really someone else would be getting a perfect life, but my life and my reputation would be shattered. So..... Erm... Probably not. :(

[Jessweeee♪]

only if those perfect lives could go to kittens

[Ayen]

If it meant I'd have a perfect life then sure, but others?

Screw them.

[Shorty]

No. Find your own happiness, somebodies.

[Pant Leg Eater from the Bad World]

I would kiss Iceglow if every time I did, someone, somewhere, had a miserable life from that point forward.

[Sephex]

0XTo6bNmX2I

[Bubba]

Only if I could choose who would get the perfect life. I would probably go down on him if that was the case.

[Mirage]

Only if my identity was kept secret. Even from Iceglow.

[Quindiana Jones]

I would kiss him 7 billion times.

[Fynn]

Ew, no.

[blackmage_nuke]

I'd cut off his lips and create an oscillating face mask with his lips on them, then attach that to my face. If it oscillates at around 50hz I should have kissed him enough times to give everyone the perfect life within 5 years though really I just want to get my perfect life so presumably when the perfect life selector chooses me I will receive a sign and not have to wear it any more, unless Im super use to it by then and dont mind keeping it on for a few more years so everyone can have a perfect life.

[Sephex]

I'd cut off his lips and create an oscillating face mask with his lips on them, then attach that to my face. If it oscillates at around 50hz I should have kissed him enough times to give everyone the perfect life within 5 years though really I just want to get my perfect life so presumably when the perfect life selector chooses me I will receive a sign and not have to wear it any more, unless Im super use to it by then and dont mind keeping it on for a few more years so everyone can have a perfect life.

Oscillating Lips would be an amazing name for a metal band.

[sharkythesharkdogg]

Sure. Steve's a good guy. Some man lovin' for the betterment of humanity isn't a bad deal.

Plus, I assume, if he's kissing he's not talking. :D

[WildRaubtier]

It's Steve, and in the words of renowned fictional mathematician Ian Malcolm:

"Steve, ah, finds a way... to talk about himself."

[The Summoner of Leviathan]

I have had sex with strangers for even less reasons, why not?

[Pumpkin]

Of course :)

[DK]

I've kissed him already, regardless of him not having this magical power. :aimkiss:

[Christmas]

With or without tongue? :quina:

[Shiny]

With or without tongue? :quina:

Yes, this is important to know.

[Denmark]

nowhere was it implied that you had to kiss him on the mouth

[Iceglow]

What in the name of fucking hell Huxley?

You wait until I've been about as active as a fossil for 2 - 3 months to make a thread to try and mock me? I think that we all ought to know that there's only 3 reasons why you could have done so. For your convenience, I've sorted them in what I assess to be the order of most likely to least likely:

1) You missed me so terribly you felt you had to put out some kind of dramatic show to try and get me posting again This is probably the most likely, since we all know that you secretly love me more than Dan, Paul and Arthur together but hey it's cool bro. I just don't feel the same I feel you ought to go ahead and make a life with Pike, it's kinda cold that you're so obsessed with me when you know you're meant to be in love with her. I'm beginning to feel a lot like Eminem in the Stan video... you're Stan.

2) You always sought vengeance for the complete shafting I gave you last time we were thrown in to the Thunderdome together. You tried to claim you were above competing against your fellow man for the enjoyment of others. You acted like it wasn't cool or that you were somehow a better human being than me. I say somehow because of course you aren't. A better human wouldn't want to be a cyborg so bad that he shoves mechanical devices in to his orifices at any given opportunity. Plus he'd realize when two men enter, only 1 man leaves and fight for his survival you simply sat there and got burnt all the while crying about how you weren't butt hurt by the fact you lost.

3) You have little else better in your life than to try and cause drama between us. It's tragic really. I'd have thought with a fiance and a busy gaming schedule you'd have enough in your life to keep you entertained clearly you need more however. It's ok bro, I got you. I understand your need for my attention, I sorry though I mean I'd love to spend my every waking moment fawning over you but frankly... I have better things to do with my time.

Now, in response to the actual topic of this thread I'm sorry but before anyone goes on whining about how I am talking about myself in this post... please tell me how in fucks name am I meant to avoid doing so?

If kissing me would give someone at random a perfect life is very much irrelevant. The relevant question is:

"Would Iceglow, aka Steve kiss you?"

Notice how the random person's perfect life doesn't come in to it? Yeah ask yourselves this, would I kiss you? I'm going to burst some bubbles here, maybe break some hearts... (Though I genuinely mean it when I ask you to please stave off from drastic actions, no one needs to self harm over me I'm just a guy, there's plenty more like me out there. Some who aren't as vain or as, shall we say difficult as me? And there's some who make me look like a living saint to be sure. Yet, I'm just a man maybe not The Man but a man and therefore I am replaceable, eventually) ... for many of you, the answer to the above question "Would Iceglow (aka me) kiss you?" is a flat no. I mean, I'm cheap sure I appreciate that but I'm not that cheap, I have standards you'd have to take me out and buy me dinner at the very least before I even considered it.

Now for the select few that could answer "Yes. Yes Steve would probably kiss me if I went for it" (here's looking at you Dan :aimkiss: Bubba... we'll talk) if someone was to get a perfect life from the act of our kissing, would it matter? I'd argue no it wouldn't because if it's a random person the odds of it being someone you or I knew are around 7000000000 to 1. If a butterfly stamped it's foot here in London and in the South China Sea there was an earthquake, would that be because the butterfly stamped it's foot or because the earth's crust floats on a mantle of molten rock and sometimes this makes it shift?

And for some people, blackmage_nuke... for some reason your post disturbs me, not because it's kinda gross in the first place but because you never actually implied you'd kill me when cutting off my lips. What is wrong with you man! Seriously? WTF? If you're cutting a man's lips off at least have the decency to kidnap him, kill him, sodomize his body and then desecrate his corpse like that. Jeez, where has all your class gone!

[Psychotic]

http://i43.photobucket.com/albums/e373/photobucketamazingness/stevehope.jpg

[NeoCracker]

I would kiss Iceglow if every time I did, someone, somewhere, had a miserable life from that point forward.

Considering you just kissed Iceglow, that's pretty much a guarantee to happen. Magical powers or not.

[blackmage_nuke]

And for some people, blackmage_nuke... for some reason your post disturbs me, not because it's kinda gross in the first place but because you never actually implied you'd kill me when cutting off my lips. What is wrong with you man! Seriously? WTF? If you're cutting a man's lips off at least have the decency to kidnap him, kill him, sodomize his body and then desecrate his corpse like that. Jeez, where has all your class gone!

I assume in the 5 years I wear the oscillating lips your perfect life will come around and they'll graft on new lips and erase any traumatising memories. Sure I'm taking away your right to voluntarily donate your lips but billions of perfect lives outweighs one person suffering for 5 years of not having lips.

[Iceglow]

Blackmage_Nuke_ for weirdest member 2015!

[Bubba]

Wait... so Steve is... Morrissey?

[Kalevala]

I'd kiss Morrissey for the story.

[Psychotic]

If a butterfly stamped it's foot here in London and in the South China Sea there was an earthquake, would that be because the butterfly stamped it's foot or because the earth's crust floats on a mantle of molten rock and sometimes this makes it shift?I'm still waiting for someone to answer Steve's question.

[Shauna]

I was going to say yes, but after that cruel wall of text, I think Steve will be missing out on Shauna-kisses. :colbert:

Sorry world!

[Lawr]

Holy wall of text batman! After seeing him post what appears to be an excerpt from the Holy Bible, I'd imagine he'd want to cuddle afterwards and talk about his life after the kiss. No thanks from me! But please, someone, kiss him for my sake!!!

Make sure you kiss him like 7 billion times just to make sure I get my blessing!

[Iceglow]

That's no wall of text, it's just I haven't posted in a long time

[Night Fury]

Do.... do.... do butterflies stamp their feet? D:

[Psychotic]

Have you ever told one it can't have ice cream? Proper little divas.

[Bubba]

Have you ever told one it can't have ice cream? Proper little divas.

Thats because they don't understand they have to wait until the ice cream has melted before they consume it. They eat using their 'proboscis' which is essentially a curly straw attached to their face. This means that their diet is liquid-based. I'd be pretty pissed off if I had to wait for my ice cream to melt before eating it. Especially if it's been in the freezer for a while.

Also, I sincerely doubt they will be able to cause an earthquake by stamping their feet. Their legs are jointed so it technically would be possible. The force required though would make this scenario an impossibility. The only way I see is if someone makes an earthquake machine with a hyper-hyper-sensitive trigger. Though, if someone did make an earthquake machine, I doubt very much they would trust its operation to an insect, no matter how pretty it was.

Also, butterflies smell with their feet. Not matter how frustrated I was, I wouldn't smash my nose into the ground. That's just silly.