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View Full Version : Battle royal: MILK!



Rin Heartilly
02-24-2016, 09:34 AM
Yes, you heard me. Milk. Now I'm pretty sure I'm lactose intolerant but I still enjoy the partaking of drinking flavoured milk!

According to wikipedia: "Australia (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Australia) has the highest consumption rate of flavored milk in the world. Flavored milk is particularly popular in the Australian states of South Australia (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/South_Australia) and Western Australia (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Western_Australia). A 2013 Sunday Times (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sunday_Times_(Western_Australia)) article reported Western Australia was the "flavoured milk capital of Australia", with a A$ (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Australian_dollar)220-million industry, average consumption of 19 liters (5.0 U.S. gal) per person, and more than 40 varieties of iced coffee (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Iced_coffee) alone available"

Now considering I'm a West Aussie, I suppose that means I'm basically an expert, a connoisseur of flavoured milk if you will, soooo I'm going to list all the best and not-best types and flavours of milk that I know of, and you tell me which are the most fab, mmkay?


~Boring milks~

1. Normal full cream milk.
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So basically, you're basic if this is your favourite milk. It's not even flavoured :colbert: However at least you're not as lame as skim-milk lovers.

2. Skim milk
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Who actually picks skim-milk as their favourite? If skim-milk was a person, you'd be full cream milk's older, skinnier, boring brother that no one talks to at parties.

3. Soy milk
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If you aren't vegan, there is no reason for you to pick this. Don't lie and say it tastes good, when you know it doesn't. It's not even that good for you, there is no reason for you to pick this nasty milk. This milk would be one of the good guys, with a sinister ulterior motive if this were a milk rpg.

4. Almond milk
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You're the cool hipster vegan guy/girl, who plays the guitar and people gather around you and sing with at parties. Almond milk tastes alright, nothing amazing, much better than your evil soy milk cousin.

5. Goats milk
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Like full cream milk, you're still basic, but you're a little cooler. While full cream milk plays video games for 6 hrs straight, you get up every hour and stretch before going back to your game.

~Flavoured milk~

6. Chocolate milk
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Almost everyone likes you, I certainly like you. You are like the king of flavoured milks, you deserve all the love.

7. Strawberry milk
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Look, I'm just gonna say it: you're not as good as chocolate milk :( However, you are still nice and popular and at least you have friends. There are some people who are embarrassed to drink you in public and need to punch bears to feel manly again after but screw those guys! You do you, strawberry milk~

8. Mint milk
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You are cool and rad. All the trendy peeps drink you and feel so trendy while updating their instagrams or pinterests with pictures of you. You are refreshing and an awesome colour.

9. Banana milk
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I feel like you're underrated sometimes, you're great but not usually the first pick when surrounded by those other milks. Most of the time you don't even taste like banana but that's okay, I still love you :)

10. Honeycomb milk
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Are you even popular outside of Australia and the UK? I had trouble even finding a proper picture of you! You're new but not that new and way more underrated than banana milk, you used to be one of my favourites as a kid but I'm over you now :( But you're still good and people (at least in Australia) really love you, chin up honeycomb!

11. Vanilla milk
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You're the most basic flavoured milk. I'm sorry. However, you're also one of the most popular! I think more people use you for cakes and desserts than just drinking you on your own but hey that means you're just really resourceful and have your eyes on greater heights. You're the milk that other unpopular milks come to for life advice.

12. Coffee milk
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This could be it's own list of cold drinks honestly: mocha, affogato, hazelnut, espresso, double espresso, cappuccino, macchiato...etc. Coffee milk is that reliable guy whose always there for you, he/she stays up late with you to get that assignment done, keeps you motivated at work and is often the first person you see in the morning. You feel like a better person with coffee milk around. Just don't be a jerk to coffee milk, I've heard he/she is not to be trusted around kids and can give you some mean diarrhea if you abuse this milk.

13. Matcha milk
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Otherwise known as green tea milk, is the mysterious and exotic person at work who brings weird yet intriguing looking food for lunch. Some people loooooooooove this milk and others describe matcha milk as grainy demonic sludge, it is a very polarizing milk. However those that love it, treat it like a cult leader and prey to its deliciousness every day along with showing it off to all their uncultured friends to remind them of how uncultured they are.

14. Melon milk
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First of all, don't type 'melon milk' into google images without safesearch on. Secondly, this milk is much more difficult to find if you don't live in Asia. However it's pretty good, not great but good. Some swear by it, it's just meh to me although I'm not that into fruit flavoured stuff in general so that's probably why. Melon milk is that friend who people forget is part of their circle of friends.

15. Apple milk
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Remember how melon milk is the friend you forget about? Apple milk...specifically green apple milk is the friend you forget about but then remember them one day and realize how rad that friend is.

16. Cookies and cream milk
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The real question is....is there anyone who actually dislikes cookies and cream flavoured anything? I'm forced to believe you have no soul if you are one of the few heathens that dislike it.

17. OTHER
Mango milk? Masala milk? Pavlova milk? Egg nog milk? Grape milk? All these are these are things, is there possibly a more miraculous milk that does not appear above?????

Yes so anyway, I've spent more time researching milk than I'd have liked to, so tell us....which is the ultimate milk? :cheer:

*And yes I spelled royale wrong but let's not milk my mistake guys, don't have a cow, moookay?

Bubba
02-24-2016, 09:57 AM
Semi-skimmed!

I honestly haven't had flavoured milk since childhood.

Formalhaut
02-24-2016, 10:19 AM
I don't think I've ever had flavoured milk, and I'm astonished at the variety available.

Honestly, I'm not concerned what milk I drink, but I tend to buy skimmed if for myself, or semi-skimmed if Mr. Carny is around.

Rin Heartilly
02-24-2016, 10:22 AM
You people are far better and more health conscious than I! :stare:

Fynn
02-24-2016, 10:25 AM
I like chocolate milk, but I rarely drink it. I mostly have like 2% milk (don't know how you guys call it, semi-skimmed?), but I also hardly ever just drink it, I mostly just make pudding with it :D

Pike
02-24-2016, 10:28 AM
Chocolate milk is the only kind of milk I like, really. Plain milk tastes weird to me.

Formalhaut
02-24-2016, 10:38 AM
I like chocolate milk, but I rarely drink it. I mostly have like 2% milk (don't know how you guys call it, semi-skimmed?), but I also hardly ever just drink it, I mostly just make pudding with it :D

2% milk would probably be called 1% milk in the U.K. Up until the last few years, we had three types of milk:


Blue - Full-fat, whole milk. Great for use in decadent milkshakes, but terribly unhealthy otherwise.

Green - Semi-skimmed. The highest I'd go up to, and the most popular type.

Red - Skimmed. What I'd get for myself. Barely any fat.


Then in... 2008, was it? New regulations meant that any milk that fell outside of these three categories in regards to fat content could also be labelled as 'milk' and not a 'milk drink', as long as the fat content was in the name and was not labelled as skimmed, semi-skimmed or whole.

Thus gave birth to 1% milk:

Orange - According to the Dairy Council (yes, such a thing exists), "1% fat milk contains 40% less total and saturated fat than standard semi-skimmed milk. In addition, it has a lower energy content than semi-skimmed, and slightly lower levels of vitamins A and E, but has a higher calcium content."

That actually sounds pretty healthy. I might convince Mr. Carny to consider orange capped milk instead of the green variety.

Also, the colours vary. I'm just used to seeing blue as whole and red as skimmed. I think that's the most common typing anyway.

Fynn
02-24-2016, 10:44 AM
Ooh, here's another potential point of contention :D

Do you buy milk in bottles or cartons?

Formalhaut
02-24-2016, 10:48 AM
Ooh, here's another potential point of contention :D

Do you buy milk in bottles or cartons?

The most popular form I've seen is bottles. Cartons do exist, often in more 'specialist' types of milk, such as flavoured, soy or lactose free varieties.

I went to Switzerland with Mr. Carny two years ago, and while I didn't really enter any supermarkets, the milk at home was UHT (ultra heat treated) milk, which apparently is much more common than the standard. It was in a carton, too.

Pheesh
02-24-2016, 10:49 AM
I don't like to drink it too much cause it's bad for your complexion, but I went with full fat milk. I rarely have milk unless I'm making myself a milkshake.

blackmage_nuke
02-24-2016, 11:22 AM
I've recently switched to full cream powdered milk since I don't drink it a lot and only recently found out long life milk is meant to be drank a week after opening it and it does't just stay fresh because of magic preservatives or something. I like to mix it with milo if im lazy, honey if I can be bothered boiling water or a banana if I can be bothered buying bananas.

Sometimes I get sweetened Soy milk it's delicious but I assume it's packed with sugar.

I also thoroughly enjoy melon milk tea.

Also if I do get chocolate/strawberry milk I'll mix it with regular milk since I don't need that super sweet explosion these days and am satisfied with a comfortable slow sugar burn and get to enjoy my thirst quenching beverage for longer

FFNut
02-24-2016, 03:41 PM
I picked other. The kind I like is when it is whipped into whip cream on top of lots and lots of pie!

Mirage
02-24-2016, 04:25 PM
low fat, but not skimmed milk. skimmed milk tastes like chalk water.

i drink milk with a fat content of 1.5%, and usually cook with whole milk, which is around 3.5% here.

Freya
02-24-2016, 04:29 PM
I cook with 2% milk but

I actually really only drink vanilla almond milk lately.

Pumpkin
02-24-2016, 04:38 PM
Chocolate milk

Pheesh
02-24-2016, 05:14 PM
I forgot about how much milk I tend to have whenever I buy Tim Tams.

Rin Heartilly
02-24-2016, 07:39 PM
I forgot about how much milk I tend to have whenever I buy Tim Tams.

Do you do the tim tam slam?? :O

Pheesh
02-24-2016, 07:43 PM
Of course! I can go through a whole tray of Tim Tams in one sitting if someone doesn't stop me. No shame.

starlet
02-24-2016, 08:40 PM
I go with almond milk in cereal specifically because it lasts forever. I don't really drink milk though....

Formalhaut
02-24-2016, 08:45 PM
What the heck are Tim Tams?

Vermachtnis
02-24-2016, 09:13 PM
I love Strawberry Milk!

maybee
02-24-2016, 09:13 PM
What the heck are Tim Tams?

Chocolate cookies that are popular in Aussie & NZ.

http://app.simplycast.com//files/5742889/images/tim-tams-bite-300x223.jpg

I love Mint milk & Lime flavored milk ! And Honeycomb milk !

Bubba
02-24-2016, 09:59 PM
What the Hell? Tim Tams are just Penguins!

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Pheesh
02-24-2016, 10:07 PM
Nope, Penguins are utter dog's balls compared to Tim Tams. Night Fury says it's just that "Tim Tams are crunchier than Penguins" but I would instead say that a Penguin is more like the creepy, unwashed brother that Tim Tams don't associate with.

Anyway, yeah, I've been in the UK for too long and have very strong feelings on this issue...

Pheesh
02-24-2016, 10:16 PM
AND ANOTHER THING! Why are they individually wrapped!? I open a packet of Tim Tams, pull out the tray and eat every last one of them. I don't want my process slowed down by having to sit there and unwrap each one, a small pile of wrappers slowly mounting on the table, taunting and reminding me of the sickening and shameful display I'm putting on.

Fucking Penguins!

Formalhaut
02-24-2016, 10:17 PM
AND ANOTHER THING! Why are they individually wrapped!? I open a packet of Tim Tams, pull out the tray and eat every last one of them. I don't want my process slowed down by having to sit there and unwrap each one, a small pile of wrappers slowly mounting on the table, taunting and reminding me of the sickening and shameful display I'm putting on.

smurfing Penguins!

It's more the environment concerns for me, but I get where you're coming from.

Slothy
02-24-2016, 11:12 PM
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Whole milk for me.

Laddy
02-25-2016, 08:55 AM
I misread the title as "Battle royal: MLK" and was extremely excited at the opportunity to be morally elitist on here.

2%.

Rin Heartilly
02-25-2016, 05:45 PM
Nope, Penguins are utter dog's balls compared to Tim Tams. Night Fury says it's just that "Tim Tams are crunchier than Penguins" but I would instead say that a Penguin is more like the creepy, unwashed brother that Tim Tams don't associate with.

Anyway, yeah, I've been in the UK for too long and have very strong feelings on this issue...

Yes, I agree! I remember my friend bought penguins to try because some heathen said they were better. When I tried it.....couldn't conceal the disappointment. We drove to woolworths and bought a pack of regular tim tams and the red velvet ones, just cos.

Bri
02-27-2016, 02:42 AM
There is one that I miss and I can't find here. Assam Milk tea and apple milk tea.

Aerith's Knight
03-01-2016, 06:44 PM
2%, the king of milk.

Shiny
03-15-2016, 02:13 AM
Other: Lactaid milk

I'm lactose intolerant soooo

BustaMo
03-18-2016, 02:19 AM
Skim milk for me. I used to be a whole milk drinker, but made the switch a few years back. Less fat. :D

I usually don't drink a lot of it, but crave it with certain kinds of foods like of course breakfast, but also any kind of Italian foods.

Zeldy
03-19-2016, 08:51 PM
I'm clearly so un educated in the world of milk, not seen most of these in shops anywhere. I differentiate between red, green and blue. To me, chocolate milk is a dessert?

I drink ALOT of tea though xD and we get green, semi-skimmed for that. I also like long-life milk from a carton in my teas too, great reserve for my Uni days and when I was in need of a cup of tea.

fire_of_avalon
03-21-2016, 04:27 AM
Whole milk. If you're drinking skim milk I promise you that you are just fooling yourself into thinking you're making a healthy choice.

theundeadhero
03-22-2016, 07:24 AM
This poll doesn't have strawberrybanana milk.