View Full Version : Mr and Ms EOFF Competition! - The Grand Finale Voting!

06-28-2017, 11:32 AM
Hellllllllo, ladies and gentlemen of EOFF!

The time has come for us to compete in order to determine who the greatest girl and best boy of EOFF is. Its been fourteen years since our previous competition. Last time, Psychotic won the Mr EOFF competition and he's confident he can hold onto it. Will he, or do you know that you're the greatest slab of manmeat in General Chat?! Halan was titled Ms EOFF, and while she no longer graces us with her presence, that just means its time for you to take her crown!

I encourage all to participate, for you'll truly have a chance to win!

Currently, this thread is for you to throw your name into the competition. Submissions are due by Saturday morningish American time. All you have to do is post in here saying you want to compete! Or, if you want to keep your entry a secret, a PM to myself works just as well.

How the competition works:

Once all the contestants have thrown their name in the lot, I will be posting a set of pageant questions. The contestants will PM me their answers in order the keep them secret from the general membership. Then, the answers will be presented in the form of


Contestant One's answer:
Contestant Forty-seven's answer:

and so on.

The members will vote on the answer they like best for each question. Answers are given in contestant format so that the focus is on voting for their favorite answer, rather than their favorite member. Contestants will be allowed to vote too, of course. How many people we have participating in the competition will determine whether contestants are eliminated in rounds, leading up to a final round between two males and two females, or if everything is handled at once. If you're a contestant, how you answer questions is up to you. Will being clever lead you to victory? Is being funny the defining characteristic of EOFF? Maybe our members are looking for a solid answer to lead them in the future, who knows?

While ran at the same time, the Mr and Ms section of the contest is separate, resulting in a crowned Mr and Ms in the end.

What are you waiting for? Put your name down today and show the forums how amazing you are!

06-28-2017, 11:45 AM
Hi there! I would like to participate :)

Night Fury
06-28-2017, 03:17 PM
Ooooh okay I'm in!

06-28-2017, 05:20 PM
Yeah sure, why not?

06-28-2017, 06:09 PM
Sounds like a bit of fun, I'll participate :)

06-28-2017, 06:53 PM

Mr. Carnelian
06-28-2017, 07:22 PM

06-28-2017, 07:27 PM
Looks like the contest is starting to get interesting, with three people for each category.

06-28-2017, 08:02 PM
if i win do i get to have a slow dance with mr eoff at the end

06-28-2017, 08:32 PM

Krissy (1976)

06-28-2017, 08:34 PM
Sign me up. :tongue:

06-28-2017, 09:00 PM
if i win do i get to have a slow dance with mr eoff at the end
What will our song be?

Sign me up. :tongue:
Mr / Ms S/he EoFF

06-28-2017, 11:27 PM
But of course.

06-28-2017, 11:32 PM

06-29-2017, 03:10 AM

06-29-2017, 12:58 PM
I will toss my hat into the ring I suppose.

Darth Ganon
06-30-2017, 05:00 AM
What do I have to lose? Besides the contest that is.

06-30-2017, 01:27 PM
Only a day left to put your name in the running.

06-30-2017, 03:26 PM
What do I have to lose? Besides the contest that is.

it's just like the idiots on this site to elect the newbie who's been here less than a month as mr eoff

don't count yourself out yet, son

06-30-2017, 05:31 PM
I'll try and wrangle Mr. Carny into signing up for this.

06-30-2017, 08:35 PM

I'll try and wrangle Mr. Carny into signing up for this.

Too late, man! He's already here :lol:

I will also dangle my wedding tackle into the lion's mouth.

06-30-2017, 08:48 PM
Ah, I normally assume I have to berate him a second time for him to sign up to things.

06-30-2017, 09:33 PM
I am Mr. Eyes on Final Fantasy, and I have been for fourteen god damn years. You want my title? Come and get it.

Honestly though, I'll happily sacrifice my title as long as I best that ill-born swineherd Bubba!

07-01-2017, 12:31 AM
Honestly though, I'll happily sacrifice my title as long as I best that ill-born swineherd Bubba!

The man has enough titles to announce himself in newbie threads, we don't need to add Mr EoFF to that.

Darth Ganon
07-01-2017, 04:17 AM
What do I have to lose? Besides the contest that is.

it's just like the idiots on this site to elect the newbie who's been here less than a month as mr eoff

don't count yourself out yet, son

It would be tempting to stop posting just so there would be an inactive member holding a title for over a decade.

07-01-2017, 04:50 AM
What do I have to lose? Besides the contest that is.

it's just like the idiots on this site to elect the newbie who's been here less than a month as mr eoff

don't count yourself out yet, son

It would be tempting to stop posting just so there would be an inactive member holding a title for over a decade.
like Halan? :bigsmile:

07-01-2017, 08:16 AM
that ill-born swineherd Bubba!

Ahhh... my entry in Who's Who?

07-01-2017, 02:59 PM
I guess I'll join. Someone needs to come in last :p

07-01-2017, 07:47 PM
Alright everyone! We now have 17 members ready to compete and its time to get the competition started.

Competing for Ms. EOFF we have:

Night Fury

Competing for Mr. EOFF we have:

pudgy bird
Mr. Carnelian
Quina (I'm guessing. If you want to be a lady let me know. There's no gender discriminating here)
Darth Ganon

and a mystery contestant who wants to remain anonymous!
kirssy, if your post was an entry its all good. Just PM me your answers and I'll adjust.

We will have three rounds of questions and its time for the first set. One misses will be knocked out this round and six misters.

Contestants, please PM me with the answers to your questions.

In two days I will present them so our audience can vote on the answers, so that means you have until Monday night at 7pm Central Time to get them in.

Here are your questions:

If you were a character in a video game, who would you be?
Is Final Fantasy dead, and if so, who killed them and where is the body?
Which two Final Fantasy characters would you vote as Mr and Ms Final Fantasy and why?
What has Eyes on Final Fantasy done for you?
If you were a beautiful song bird, what sound would you make if your were sucked into a 747's engine?
If you could be in a rap video with one other contestant who would you choose and which of you would be laying down the beats and which one would be laying down the lyrics?

Everyone feel free to discuss the questions in here while we wait for the answers.

07-01-2017, 10:46 PM
For fun I'll record all the birds going into a turbine sounds and post them. :bigsmile:

Darth Ganon
07-03-2017, 05:27 AM
For some reason I was expecting the questions to be PMed out to us. That would have been a great way to trip right out of the gate.

07-03-2017, 06:31 AM
I will get my stuff sorted out tonight.

07-03-2017, 12:46 PM
Ohh Jeepers you picked the busiest week in Canada to start this. Ok let me see what I can get going tonight.

07-03-2017, 10:40 PM
Quina (I'm guessing. If you want to be a lady let me know. There's no gender discriminating here)
Why would that matter in a cooking competition?

07-04-2017, 01:29 AM
We're still missing some entries, and I didn't realize it was a holiday weekend, so you all have an extra day to get them in. Hope everyone makes it.

07-04-2017, 05:20 PM
Thank goodness. Although I don't have the excuse of the holiday weekend, I got home late from work and fell asleep immediately p much.

Tonight for deals.

07-04-2017, 06:21 PM
On it now!

07-04-2017, 11:13 PM
A few hours left to go. I appreciate everyone that sent their entries in.

07-04-2017, 11:30 PM

I forgot! Hang on, I'll write them now.

07-04-2017, 11:37 PM
mine r n

07-04-2017, 11:55 PM
Oh I was expecting to be PM'd the questions. I didn't realise I had to keep an eye on the thread. How long do I have? Am I too late?

07-05-2017, 12:06 AM
You still have time. GO GO GO.

07-05-2017, 12:27 AM
Gotta admit I was also expecting a PM but completely my fault, I should've been paying attention.

They should all be sent now!

07-05-2017, 01:25 AM
Sent mine too, although I probably shouldn't have bothered!

07-05-2017, 03:23 AM
Our answers are in and its time to begin voting! Be prepared to spend some time reading, because our contestants love their long answers. Votes will need to be in withing three days, so you have until Friday night to vote.

All five Ms EOFF contestants sent their answers in and we now have eight Mr EOFF contestants. That means we will still only knock out one Ms EOFF this round, but three Mr EOFFs. The contestants who get the lowest amount of votes on their questions will be the ones out.

Please send me your votes in a PM. You can send in one vote for a Ms EOFF and a Mr EOFF for each question, meaning your PM should look something like this:


Q1: Contestant two
Q2: Contestant two
Q3: Contestant three
Q4: Contestamt four
Q5: Contestant three
Q6: Contestant five


Q1: Contestant four
Q2: Contestant one
Q3: Contestant six
Q4: You get
Q5: the idea
Q6: by now

Okay, here are the answers you'll be voting on. I've put them behind spoiler tags since some can get pretty long.


Contestant 1: I always want to say something cool like THE HERO or THE VILLAIN or YOUR AWESOME ALLY WHO THROWS OUT SASSY ONE LINERS AND IS KIND OF A DICK ASS BUT ALSO LOVABLE AND GETS trout DONE, but realistically I'm probably the NPC who was poorly translated and sells you gear with worse stats than you currently have even though this is the first new settlement you've seen in like, 3 hours.

Contestant 2: Alisaie Leveilleur from FFXIV. Why, you ask (I don't care that you didn't)? She has a chronic case of sass mouth, one that rivals my own.

Contestant 3: I would love to step into the shoes of The Illusive Man from Mass Effect 2 and 3, because I think deep down I'd love to have a go at being a villain, but also because as a character he's so interesting.... What are his true motivations? What would it be like to have a view so warped as his? To sit in that nuanced mind and have all of those resources that could effectively bring so much change, but to use them for such awful purposes - thinking that you're doing the right thing. Wow, like how weird would it be? Also, his office is amazing!

Contestant 4: I would be lord's blade Ciaran because she is a beast!

Contestant 5:

Contestant 1: What's dead may never die, but rises again harder and stronger.

In other words, this series is terrible and always has been. And FFXIV seems to be the exception, but then 95% of the userbase couldn't play the game at launch because of poor design and now it keeps getting DDoS'd sooo.

the body is buried in the garbage heap where it belongs

Contestant 2: Final Fantasy is not dead. Although, to this day I question why I went along with the burial anyway.

Contestant 3: Final Fantasy is dead, Tetsuya Nomura killed it, and the body is just slowly decomposing under his pile of ideas for Final Fantasy XV and Kingdom Hearts 3. There's just slushy, stinky mush now.

Contestant 4: Yes, sadly. Killed by the notorious Call of Duty sending the body of Final Fantasy into the royal garden of Wonderland.

Contestant 5:

Contestant 1: Squall and Garnet because ............................

(so much charisma)

Contestant 2: Obviously the most popular characters in the series deserve to be Mr and Ms Final Fantasy, brand recognition and whatnot. They will bring people flocking.

Amarant and Vanille.

Contestant 3: I think Cloud would make a great Mr Final Fantasy because he is probably the most famous Final Fantasy character ever. I also think that Cloud would be the best Ms Final Fantasy because not a single female character has matched her beauty. And I'm a sucker for a cross dresser.

Contestant 4: Squall Leonhart & Rinoa Heartilly because they are the best love story in the series in my opinion.

Contestant 5:

Contestant 1: Brought me nothing but a lifetime of misery and self-hatred.

In other words: my very best friends and my spouse.

Contestant 2: It has given me endless hours of procrastination material. Which is a double edged sword since I have many other things that I really should be doing with my life that I am actively avoiding.

Also something about friendship if you must get some soppy words.

Contestant 3: I have learned so much from Eyes on Final Fantasy. For instance, that Iceglow ate a nugget of his niece/nephews poop. That Iceglow destroyed his badged up denim jacket by sliding in dog diarrhoea, and that Iceglow has smashed more birds than anyone else.

Truthfully, it has done so much for me. I wouldn't be where I am today, the person that I am today, or why I am the way I am without the influence of Eyes on Final Fantasy. So many people here have had an impact in my life, whether it's through sharing their story, or getting to know them - there's that impact that you feel from everyone. We're a tight-knit and welcoming community of nerds who, in the last few years have really grown personally together. We share the ins and outs of our daily lives with each other and that's bound to really be impactful in the long run. Sometimes when I'm out I'll see something that makes me think of an EoFFer. I think about this place EVERY DAY. It's part of me, and I'm part of it too. We all are. We are Eyes on Final Fantasy.

Contestant 4: It's allowed me to meet lots of nice people from around the world I wouldn't have otherwise met.

Contestant 5:

Contestant 1: lol is this how you ayy dank may may bruh


Contestant 2: The sound of my people. No, not bagpipes.

Contestant 3: The sound of tearing fabric, like a jacquard throw pillow and then that "PLOOF" noise of feathers bursting out. It would be pretty quiet, and not too gross sounding but totally messy.


Contestant 5:

Contestant 1: Quina, hands down. Me doing the beats because I'm hella awesome and music, Quina doing the lyrics because he talk best way and HE DO WHAT HE WANT

Contestant 2: Psy can do the lyrics, because he's an amusing guy and it will cover up the fact that I cannot do any kind of beat boxing. What can I say? I have no talents.

Contestant 3: I would absolutely be in a rap video with Psychotic. In the video, he would be laying down the beats and I'd be laying down the lyrics, but trust that the whole thing would be a collaborative effort and we'd write it together, and come up with the music together. It would be some comedy rap like early 00's Eminem - but it would be so blindingly white like Vanilla Ice. It would be the most awkwardly amazing thing, like a car crash that you can't take your eyes off.

Contestant 4: escobert would lay down the beat by beatboxing while I rap like Busta Rhymes

Contestant 5:


Contestant 1: I would be Red, the pokémon master!
♪♫♪ I would travel across the land, searching far and wide. Each pokémon, to understand. The power that's inside.♪♫♪

Contestant 2: Duke Nukem. It takes a hell of a long time for me to be ready to perform and when I do, it is a disappointing experience that's over all too quickly.

Contestant 3: Snorlax because I like sleeping and eating. Minus the 1000 pounds.

Contestant 4: Cid in FFVII. Smokin' cussin' and fixin' stuff.

Contestant 5: Well that should be plainly obvious! My character may not be much to look at, they might say weird nonsensical things every now and then, and they may not have much relevance to the plot, but at least they are part of a video game. I'm obviously talking about Psychotic from Death of a Fansite!

Contestant 6: The drunk guy in the bar in Timber from FFVIII

Contestant 7: Good question!

I've thought about this before, mainly because this sounds like something Wolf Kanno would ask. And of course, since Death of a Fansite, I literally am a character in a video game.

So naturally of course, I would be myself. With my mad debuffing skills and questionable emo hair. Which isn't a completely accurate picture of the real me, unless you count 'whining about the heat' to debuff someone's sanity.

I'm assuming picking 'myself' is kind of a cheap answer though, so instead I'll actually give this question some thought. Several candidates flashed through my mind. My original namesake on this site was Balthier Rocks, which kind of says it all, really. He is really dashing, even if he insists on backless sandals.

I also considered Apollo Justice for his impeccable taste in waistcoats and general good nature and sense of justice, and Geralt from The Witcher because then the flirting with Fynn would reach critical mass.

However, I'm going with Sorey from Tales of Zestiria, because he's just a lovely person, with a strong heart, and an unshakable warmth he exudes towards his friends, strangers and even enemies. But more to the point I would eliminate 'ho yay' and just make it full-on in your face explicit 'ho yeah', like God intended.

Contestant 8: Ditto from Pokémon because that way I could be every other character! Providing that I met those characters, of course. Otherwise I'd forever look like a piece of chewed gum, but that's a risk I'm willing to take

Contestant 1: Final fantasy will never die, as long as the fans and players keep it alive with their passion. As long as EoFF exists, Final Fantasy will live on, perhaps as a zombie, but still around. :zombie:

Contestant 2: Didn't they announce the death of Final Fantasy eight years ago?

Coming soon: Final Fantasy Nova Death Compilation Experience™

Starring everyone's favourite character Lightning™, now sporting E-Cup breasts and enhanced jiggle physics™
An emotional narrative experience, as players uncover the moving story of the L'Cie™ as they achieve their transmogrified focus to become Fal'Cie™
The compilation features an 87 minute CGI movie, a Facebook game and soft drink Potions™ (Japan exclusive)
Want another Battle on the Big Bridge™ remix? Great, we'll cram another boss battle against Gilgamesh™ in there somehow
Available on all mobile devices
Please look forward to it!

Contestant 3: Not dead, but limping. Perhaps it has gout. In which case it's not "Who killed it?", but "Who is feeding it chopped liver?"

Contestant 4: No not dead yet! I think they've realized they need to get back to some of the basics of the series.

Contestant 5: It was Ms. Scarlet with the Junon Cannon in the Cosmo Canyon Observatory!

Contestant 6: Soup Dude from Wall Market. The body is... well, don't try the soup

Contestant 7: Final Fantasy isn't dead I think. I think Final Fantasy is that middle-aged man sitting in his living room lounge at night, drinking beer, kids gone to bed, wondering 'is this all there is?' before changing channels because that's all he can do.

In other words, I think FF is going through a mid-life crisis. It feels like it's lost its sense of direction since FFXIII after the mixed fan reception and the initial launch of FFXIV didn't help either. A lot of their stock went down after that, at least in terms of Final Fantasy.

Who crushed this poor middle-aged man's soul? Just my opinion and it is a very complex topic but I do think 'having too many children' hurt (it's my analogy, roll with it). There used to be a time where a Final Fantasy game was a super big deal. Now, with various spin-offs and mobile games flooding the market, the brand's lost the magic. The significance. I think it needs to recapture that.

It isn't dead. But I don't think a shiny new Regalia is going to fix all their problems.

Contestant 8: Final Fantasy isn't dead...yet. Although I did hear through the grapevine that Tabata was planning on blowing up the Sector 7 reactor located underneath Square Enix HQ, which could kill off FF forever! He was heard saying "If FFXV can't be the new FFVII then no FF can!". Ominous words.

Contestant 1: Mr Final Fantasy was a very competitive competition. We had the Blond Haired guy with a big sword, Cloud. The Brown haired guy with a gun sword Squall. The other blond haired guy with the water sword Tidus, all of whom were crushed when Sabin suplexed a train into them. Then Bartz came out of nowhere and charmed all of the ladies to vote for him with his sexy charms.
large pic

Contestant 2: Ms. EoFF would be Celes. Her tragedy driven story is a touching metaphor for the human condition, as we all yearn to love and to be loved in return as we struggle to find our place in a world that can feel isolating and lonely.

Mr. EoFF would be Sephiroth. Sometimes I like to pretend that I am Sephiroth, and imagining that I'm swinging his big sword around lets me briefly compensate for my small penis.

Contestant 3: Mog and Mag. A deeper romance you'll never find.

Contestant 4: Cloud and Rinoa because I think they are perfect for their lead roles in the stories.

Contestant 5: Mog (FFVI) and Mog (FFXIII-2). First of all, moogles are cute and are the best characters of FF. Second, these two mogs are important to their games and also bring together the old schools and new schools of Final Fantasy.

Contestant 6: Mukki from FFVII should hold both titles

Contestant 7: That's a difficult one. There's so many characters to choose from.

I'll go with Ms. Final Fantasy first. I was thinking of a really strong female character and - honestly - there isn't a whole heap (of the games I've personally played), but I settled with Ashe from FFXII.

Besides the fact that she wears the shortest mini-skirt I've ever seen, she's a very strong-willed character who doesn't fit into the classic 'princess' role, at least in my opinion. There's romance in the beginning, but that's brutally cut short, and she mostly relies on her inner strength.

But over the course of the game she does learn to lean on the others a bit. She ultimately carves out her own path. There's a subtle, progressive character development going on that I only really appreciated on a second playthrough.

For Mr. Final Fantasy, I'm kinda hamstrung by not playing FFIX (I can guess Vivi would be a popular pick here).

I mean sure I could say Balthier here because 'tight leather trousers' alone does it for me, but if we're taking the whole character into account...

Hmm, tough one, but I'll go for Ramza, from FFT. I just really liked his character development through the entire story, how he goes from simply wanting to uphold his family name, to exploring the ever-present aspects of good and evil and what 'good' truly means. It was particularly relevant given the world's dubious morality and politicking.

Contestant 8: Ms FF - Yuffie Kisaragi! An unlikely choice, I know, but she'd only end up stealing the title off of the winner anyway so I might as well just give it to her straight up. Besides that I think she's a misunderstood character who tries her best to do her family proud.

Mr EoFF - Vivi. He's such a pleasant young man who struggles to integrate with society and I think winning Mr FF would boost his confidence greatly!

Contestant 1: Eyes on Final Fantasy has and always will be a place where I can be myself, relax and have a good time. That is more important than anything else. Everyone needs a place to truly be themselves.

Contestant 2: An old constipation remedy of mine was to read EoFF on my phone whilst perched atop the toilet. The turds in my body would come flying out in a desperate attempt to join their brethren in the Eyes on Each Other forum.

Contestant 3: Thanks to EoFF I'm quickly on my way to making my first million in Monopoly cash.

Contestant 4: So much of the last decade and a half. I've met so many people, spent countless hours in chat or playing with EoFFers in games. I've met a couple IRL. It was always a place for me to go and enjoy myself while growing up.

Contestant 5: I've met several great people over the years, and they were all delicious.

Contestant 6: Stunted my professional development

Contestant 7: I'll say the usual things: it's offered me a place to geek out, where I can't really talk about games in real life very much. It's taught me about all kinds of different games and series and I love that people are so happy to tell me all about the colourful and bizarre world of Japanese visual novels. It made me really question the deeper questions in life, like soup. It's also given me friends, and a place to call home even if I left it alone for a while because of University or just plain absent-mindedness.

I remember feeling depressed for a period - don't ask me when, they occur every Tuesday - but it was a few years ago, and I was feeling especially down, and I remember someone telling me, I think it was Freya, to expect something to arrive in the mail. I was like "huh, what exactly" but she said to be patient and sure enough this big cardboard box appears at my mum's house - thanks EoFF for making me lie about the origins of this box - and inside were American chocolates, Hersheys, so clearly you guys didn't love me that much, a Chocobo plushie, poster, a book, but also a lovely handwritten letter and images from a lot of you guys. I think it remains to this day the most lovely, unexpected thing that's ever happened to me.

That's what EoFF has done for me. And I'll never forget it.

Contestant 8: Introduced me to a welcoming community full of wonderful members who I would like to get to know more. It also helps me escape that mundane task known as "life"!


Contestant 2: I made a voice file of me making chocobo noises! (http://vocaroo.com/i/s1GbGSQFLJ6G) :chocobo:

Contestant 3: 9FHw2aItRlw

Contestant 4: Squeeee!

Contestant 5: It would probably sound something like what Raistlin was doing in that bathroom.

Contestant 6: Strangely, it would be the ringtone from the CTU offices in the long-running crime-thriller TV show 24


I don't care how beautiful a song bird I was, or how well I could sing. No-one sounds great going into a engine.

Contestant 8: A kind of sound that only someone with a live bird and a mincer would know

Contestant 1: If Krissy is participating I would be laying down the lyrics to the sick beats he makes.

If no Krissy then Vermachnatis. I would be doing the beats here, and I have no idea what his lyrics would be but I'm OK with that

Contestant 2: I will team up with Bubba and of course he would be on lyrics, rapping about his Ciddies wins to the tune of Kanye West's ballad, Power.

I'm posting on Eyes on Final Fantasy, posting 'bout my peen to it
Post it better than any member you ever seen do it
Bans for the spambots, someone's gotta do it
I guess every Ciddies winner needs his theme music

No one man should keep winning Best Member
The clock’s ticking the time down to December
Stop posting, there's just one name to remember
(21st-Century Cid's Knight)

The forum's broken, Feedback's closed, Academia's open
You ain’t got no Ciddies to lose, mothersmurfer you trolling
Huh? Mothersmurfer you trolling
With Del Murder and Jinx, they're always moaning
In Bubba's world they're never chosen
So goodnight, Discord, I'll spam you in the morning
Huh? I’ll spam you in the morning
Ciddies are way too much, I need a moment

No one man should keep winning Best Member
The clock’s ticking the time down to December
Stop posting, there's just one name to remember
Till then, smurf that, I'm Funniest Member
(21st-Century Cid's Knight)

Now this will be a beautiful thread
Throw my Ciddies out the window, give them to undeadhero
This will be a beautiful thread
Throw my Ciddies out the window, give them to undeadhero
Do you have the power to let the Ciddies go?

Meanwhile I'll be laying down the beats. Specifically, I'll be laying down beats onto Bubba's square-shaped yet oddly alluring head with a tire iron in the forlorn hope it'll shut him up about the Ciddies once and for all.

Contestant 3: I don't know which screen name Weird Al goes by on here, but him. I would beatbox and he would rhyme.

Contestant 4: Me, N, DK and Meat Puppet would be like the new Beastie Boys with MP on the turntable.

Contestant 5: It would be my good friend Darth Ganon, who lays beats so legit they're canon
I would handle spittin the word, rhymes so phat like pudgy bird
Our lyrics would make your eyes blurry, comin' at you in the dark like a Night Fury
Darth G and I make the rap world look orwellian, we go together better than Formy and Mr. Carnelian
We don't care what no one thinks, respect our beats or get our Jinx!

Contestant 6: I would lay down beats to lyrics from Psy. The level of ineptitude would be so high that people would assume we were a parody act and we'd make millions.

Contestant 7: Bubba. He has the musical talent, and before you go on yes I know playing acoustic doesn't translate to rap but he'll have the rhythm dammit! He'll lay down the beats, and I'll be throwing down 'dem sick rhymes blud'.

It'll still be one of the worst rap videos ever composed, but at least we'll be able to beat these guys:


Contestant 8: Quina on lyrics, me on beats! The rap would be called "99 Problems but this fork ain't one"

There you have it! Lets get some votes in to see who goes on to round two.

07-05-2017, 03:49 AM
fuck off shion, way to win every goddamn vote for every question xD

that death rattle bit, though

jfc xD

since when did you get so funny

07-05-2017, 07:06 AM
Bloody hell this'll give me something to do on my lunch break.

Also, can self voting be prohibited? It's fine for the Ciddies but it's a bit ehhh in a knock out contest.

07-05-2017, 02:38 PM
Completely missed that this was already happening. Bummer.

07-05-2017, 02:44 PM
Bloody hell this'll give me something to do on my lunch break.

Also, can self voting be prohibited? It's fine for the Ciddies but it's a bit ehhh in a knock out contest.

^this 100%

07-05-2017, 02:56 PM
Right so, I was SURE I knew who Mr EoFF #2 was (well, down to two people) until that Vocaroo. Now I am absolutely stumped (well, not absolutely, I have narrowed down between a different 2 people, and leaning more heavily to one than the other).

But dang! You're a funny dude. xD

07-05-2017, 10:17 PM

07-05-2017, 10:19 PM
Congrats to all the dinners.

07-05-2017, 11:34 PM
Man you picked the busiest week in North America to star this. Both independent days, days apart. Was busy with RL stuff such as family visiting and what not and missed it.

07-05-2017, 11:49 PM
womp womp

07-06-2017, 01:18 AM
Will get on this tomorrow :)

07-06-2017, 09:28 AM
Yeah, I suppose we can make it a rule not to vote for yourself. No one has yet.

07-06-2017, 04:51 PM
I've now voted. Congrats to all the losers. Also I'm pretty sure I can identify most of you from your answers. Then again you can probably guess which contestant I am too, so :greenie:

07-06-2017, 08:07 PM
Sorry theundeadhero I may have voted for myself. I can't remember my answers.

07-06-2017, 08:22 PM

07-06-2017, 08:37 PM

Not really. You're all good Quina. You're duck sandwiches were all in a row without a single vote for yourself.

07-06-2017, 08:57 PM
I demand a revote too! But only a revote where we can score entries 1, 2, and 3 points. I didn't like choosing just one because there were so many good ones!

07-06-2017, 09:02 PM
There were definitely many where it was like, "ugh, so many options". Just because I didn't vote for someone doesn't mean I didn't think their shit was a++

07-06-2017, 09:44 PM
I'll get around to voting and recording those glorious bird noises tonight I hope. I've been quite busy this week. :shobon:

07-07-2017, 12:14 AM
Sent my votes in just now, Good luck Everyone!!!

Darth Ganon
07-07-2017, 05:19 AM
Just like homework I waited until the last minute.

And it's just like me to feel guilty for not voting for certain contestants at all, despite not actually being able to vote for all at least once for Mr. EoFF. There's certainly some kind of medication for this sort of thing.

07-07-2017, 01:54 PM

07-07-2017, 02:02 PM
You have about twelve hours to get your votes in before we move on to round two

07-07-2017, 03:53 PM
*quickly makes another account to vote for himself* :p

ANNNDDDDD I've sent my votes in :)

I need to up my game for round 2 xD

07-07-2017, 04:52 PM
I need to up my game for round 2 xD


I'm not sure I'll make round 2 though :lol:

07-07-2017, 05:02 PM
I need to up my game for round 2 xD


I'm not sure I'll make round 2 though :lol:
Oh, I forgot there were knockouts xD I'm definitely not through haha. Oh well, you know what they say...it's not the winning, it's the taking part...bullshit xD

07-07-2017, 05:50 PM
Oh yeah haha I'll be so surprised if I make it through at all. My answers are so long-winded.

07-08-2017, 01:44 AM
Looks like some hard competition in the Mr category. We're coming up with a tie and I could use some more votes before its over soon.

Night Fury
07-08-2017, 02:25 AM
Is there still time for me to vote? I have forgotten to up till now!

07-08-2017, 02:56 AM
A couple of last minute votes came in and we're ready to reveal who advances to the next round.

Ms EOFF had a large mix of votes. It was a close race, but sadly one contestant will be leaving the stage tonight.

Night Fury

Which leaves Bri with the least amount of votes. I really appreciate your participation. Thanks for being a contestant!

Mr EOFF had a few dominating members, which left the rest in a race to not be removed. One would push ahead, then fall back behind until it was tied again.

pudgy bird
Darth Ganon

The three to be removed are Bubba, escobert, and our mystery contestant. It was a close call, and thank you for trying your luck. I hope to see you compete again.

Now, on to round two.

For this round, you have three questions to answer, and three days to send those answers in. Entries are due strictly by 8pm Central Time Monday night. One Ms and two Mr EOFFs will be removed this round.

Your questions:

If you could add one new thing to the main site or the forums, what would you want to add?

If Loony BoB was John Lennon, then who would be Paul McCartney, George Harrison and Ringo Starr?

Are the staff still the "goddamn Shin-Ra?


07-08-2017, 03:01 AM
Don't you mean 2 of each?!

07-08-2017, 03:02 AM
Nope, the final round will have three contestants for the title.

07-08-2017, 03:11 AM
that's weird

07-08-2017, 03:23 AM
it's weird because mr and ms eoff are separate titles, so the winner of ms eoff will be declared after this round

07-08-2017, 03:24 AM
nvm i can't fucking read

Darth Ganon
07-08-2017, 04:51 AM
*member specific questions*



07-08-2017, 07:08 AM
Can we find out which contestant was which member?

07-08-2017, 11:26 AM
I did it! I have become...a summoner. Round 2 here I come!

Can we find out which contestant was which member?
I think we should find out at the end or else some clever cloggs will work out who the remaining contestants are due to process of elimination!

07-08-2017, 11:29 AM
But we already know who the remaining contestants are!

07-08-2017, 11:36 AM
But we don't know who was contestant 1, 2, 3 etc.

07-08-2017, 11:39 AM
Yeah, that's what I want to know. I assume people are going to be given new numbers for Round 2 :p

07-08-2017, 02:02 PM
If we're given new numbers for round 2 then yeah, we should find out who they were :)


07-08-2017, 02:33 PM
It's a secret to everybody :shifty:

I hadn't decided yet if I wanted to reveal who was who and this point, let them reveal themselves, or reveal it all at the end. Lets get more opinions. I will say that the mystery contestant will have to reveal themselves, and that it wasn't me :p I can tell you which answers were his along with everyone else, though.

07-08-2017, 02:39 PM
It was Fynn.

07-08-2017, 04:17 PM
I mean, I was so obvious I'd be surprised if someone couldn't recognise me.

More questions I'm going to fail on, yaaaaay!

Darth Ganon
07-10-2017, 05:47 AM
Mine are in. I had to crank my BS train so high into overdrive that it crashed through Coral.

07-10-2017, 07:46 AM
Mine are in. I had to crank my BS train so high into overdrive that it crashed through Coral.Well, your train metaphor made me do that laugh where you exhale sharply out of your nose, so if your answers are at that standard you should be okay.

07-10-2017, 06:02 PM
More questions I'm going to fail on, yaaaaay!

Well you obviously didn't fail since you made it past the first cut :p

07-10-2017, 06:27 PM
When is the swimsuit round? I've been on a diet just for that.

07-10-2017, 08:02 PM
When is the swimsuit round? I've been on a diet just for that.
I guess you'll have to find a new way to extract Blue Magic for now, then :D

07-10-2017, 09:04 PM
I'm getting my answers in now. Had to think about these a lot.

07-10-2017, 11:45 PM
I just re-read my sent answers and honestly if I don't make it to the final round then I'm rage quitting the forums :lol:

07-11-2017, 03:28 AM
Its time to look at some answers!

Sadly, we had a misses not make their answers in time, so we'll have to adjust. The final round will now have to be between the last two members, meaning only one Ms be will voted out, but three Mr's will be exiting this round.

Remember each question gets a vote for both the Mr and Ms categories. Voting will end 11pm central time Thursday night. This round, the same member isn't the same contestant for each question. If you're trying to guess who is who you'll have a harder time at it.


Contestant 1: This is a toughie. I am torn between some kind of perpetual motion machine but instead of motion it generates interesting conversation topics for everyone and a widget that provides us with terrible puns on a daily basis. Such a decision should not be made by a mere mortal.

Contestant 2: I would make it okay to do general gaming articles on the frontsite. I'm burned out on writing for FF but I still want to write about games.

Contestant 3: I think I would add a shop of really awesome nerd tat designed by our members. I actually was always working on that - and it ended up getting leaked way too early. But yeah, EoFF merchandise store is the dream that we're waiting for.

Contestant 1: This is a void question - because there's no way that Loony BoB would ever be John Lennon. I also care very little about who else is who, do we even have Scouse members? Hunhhhhhhhh. I guess The EoFF Beatles would be the 4 Horsemen of the Adminopolypse.

Loony BoB - John Lennon
Psychotic - Paul McCartney
Del Murder - George Harrison
Shlup - Ringo Starr

ps that Butler is Raistlin.

- Just as long as I can be Linda McCartney, because her sausages are dope.

Contestant 2: loony bob penetrated me, loony bob shaved my nip. and loony bob kissed my goat in that order. Take That will have never sounded so good!

Contestant 3: Del Murder, Psychotic, and Elly

Contestant 1: No.

Contestant 2: Yes, because I am the beautiful Scarlett and I will bitch-slap fight Tifa into the ground. Lemme tell ya, I look mega great in a red dress.

Contestant 3: Will they ever not be? I mean this is such a timeless piece of EoFF's history - I don't think the staff are ever going to shake that 'rumour.'


Contestant 1: A "teleport to this member function". It would only last for five minutes and you could only use it once a week, so you'd have to decide how best to use it. Has a member posted about a bad day in the Lifestream? Go give them a hug. Flirting it up in Discord? Go get yourself a quickie. The EoFF Annual Hootenanny would see everyone cramming into one person's home and trying to consume as much alcohol as possible in the five minutes.

All good ideas right? Let me tell you what I'd do with it. I'd make Formalhaut's life a living smurfing hell.

Once a week I'd strip down to a tight bright green banana hammock and put on one of those realistic horse masks, before slathering myself in an actual ocean of baby oil. Over at Formy's house, a woosh of a teleport is heard. He and Mr. Carnelian share a look of terror. The horse has come.

I'd rampage through his house, smashing everything. Tables? Overturned. Toothpaste? Squirted all over the bathroom. Shoes? Flung out the window. All this while incessantly bellowing. Formy would desperately try to grab a hold of this berserk horse, only to yet again have the oiled up equine slither out of his grasp. As time ticks over to five minutes I'd return home with a loud pop, and Formy is left with a house that looks like a violent slug orgy has taken place, and the still unanswered questions of who is doing this to him and why.

Contestant 2: A battle system. I belong to a forum a long time ago that had a text based clan battle system played on AIM. Everybody joined a clan, picked a class, and earned gold by posting. It was so much fun and I never saw anything like that again since.

Contestant 3: I would add a food forum. More specifically, a cooking forum. A forum about cooking frogs. Yes, that's it. A forum about cooking fried frog legs with a tangy dipping sauce. Wait, I got it. A forum about cooking fried frog legs with a tangy dipping sauce and sides of baked beans and potato salad. And an ice cold lemonade. That would be the greatest forum ever. Now excuse me, I need to go get a snack.

Contestant 4: Very good question. I'm not sure really. Obviously something that would either bring new members in, or tightens the bond between existing members. I remember doing the Community Updates a few years ago, and they were broadly successful for a while (whenever I remembered to do them, of course!).

Now that new threads aren't being produced once an hour, it'll have to be retuned. Maybe monthly, and with more of an emphasis on user input, like a "what I'm playing this month" as opposed to just a rote list of threads to look at. You might take elements from Eyes on You into the Community Update, and sort of turn the whole thing into a newsletter-type deal.

Look it's the best I've got, okay?

Contestant 5: I would definitely add a forum arcade! A forum I used to frequent in the past had this and, omg, it was so much fun. I spent far too much time playing all the various games available and trying to beat peoples high scores; there were often competitions held as well. Once the feature was taken away from the forum so many of us were calling for it to come back - it never did. I've been craving a forum arcade ever since, and I would love to see one here at Eyes on Final Fantasy.

Contestant 1: I guess Paul could be his best friend Psychotic. Geourge could be "the quiet one" Del Murder (as I've heard of that guy but never met him). Ringo could be ShlupQuack, the weird one. They would have a nice thing going for a while until BoB's latest internet fling, aka Yoko Ono, comes in and breaks them all up. I'm obviously talking about loony bob penetrated me (http://home.eyesonff.com/member.php/17501-loony-bob-penetrated-me).

Contestant 2:

Paul McCartney: An overbearing need to control, categorise and order everything into spreadsheets
George Harrison: A yearning to be near other human beings at all times, but not knowing how to achieve this other than collecting their hair and tenderly caressing it
Ringo Starr: Final Fantasy XIV

Contestant 3: Psychotic, Fynn, and Bubba. When asked if Bubba was the best drummer in the world, Looney replied that he wasn't even the best in the band. Psychotic wrote a song titled "Will you Still Love my Nintendo 64?" Fynn announces sunrises.

Contestant 4: I'd be Ringo Starr. I mean, I have no musical talent whatseoever but he did used to do the narration for Thomas the Tank Engine which was, like, one of my favourite kids TV programmes back in the day so I feel like I've got a connection with him there. I also had drumming lessons as a kid...but only like, one. My teacher was ridiculously scary and I never went back. Bubba would be George Harrison because, you know, lead guitarist. As for Paul McCartney...hmm. I did a bit of digging for this one and I'm going for your.mind.is.on.the.line. I don't know this member - it was before my time. But they thought that he had one of the greatest voices in rock and roll so maybe they could step in to his shoes! http://home.eyesonff.com/showthread.php/92327-The-Greatest-Voices-of-Rock-amp-Roll?p=1874406&viewfull=1#post1874406

Contestant 5: Jesus Christ. I don't really know the Beatles very well, or know enough members to properly give an answer to this question. Uuuuuuh. Yeah, I'm gonna fail badly on this one, guys.

Psy as Paul McCartney.
Steve as Ringo Starr.
Christmas as George Harrison, because why the hell not at this point xD

Contestant 1: ABSOLUTELY! While those scummy corporate &%#*#)#@ live it up in the life of luxury above the plate in their EoFF HQ the rest of us are doomed to a life of misery and suffering in the EoFF slums. I can...*cough* hardly breathe in all this smog. This guy are sick of the divide!

Contestant 2: If by Shin-Ra you mean the evil company in Final Fantasy VII, I am not aware of any of the staff ever being in Shin-Ra as the Shin-Ra are bad guys and the staff have always been very nice to me. However I notice that there is no end quote in your sentence so it is possible it got cut off and you meant "Shin-Ramyun", the spicy Korean noodle soup:


The question of whether or not the staff are Shin Ramyun is an interesting one. It starts off dry, which matches Psychotic's wit. Add some water and you get that wet noodle Loony BoB. It is quite spicy like Shauna, hot like Bubba, and overall gives you a good feeling like Pike does. As for Sephex, he's too busy thinking about that beef jerky hole to worry about noodles.

contestant 3: Some of my best friends are Shin-Ra!

Contestant 4:

http://i.imgur.com/TqmhUK8.jpg The Cocky One http://home.eyesonff.com/user/avatar/thumbs/avatar35701_13.gif

http://i.imgur.com/3vq8zPj.jpg The Stern One http://home.eyesonff.com/user/avatar/thumbs/avatar15366_37.gif

http://i.imgur.com/H2aTlL2.jpg The Wacky One http://home.eyesonff.com/user/avatar/thumbs/avatar80_3.gif

http://i.imgur.com/uuaFk4Z.jpg The Bald One http://home.eyesonff.com/user/avatar/thumbs/avatar5602_175.gif

http://i.imgur.com/O3UgfMf.jpg The Bitchslappy One http://home.eyesonff.com/user/avatar/thumbs/avatar37472_155.gif

http://i.imgur.com/xsoGtcE.jpg The Grumpy One http://home.eyesonff.com/user/avatar/thumbs/avatar20702_51.gif

http://i.imgur.com/WWbeHJa.jpg The Deviant One http://home.eyesonff.com/user/avatar/thumbs/avatar35332_129.gif

http://i.imgur.com/ib6lbJJ.jpg The Who Even Is This One? http://home.eyesonff.com/user/avatar/thumbs/avatar39814_33.gif

Contestant 5: Apparently not.

There's some great answers in here. Lets see which gets the most votes.

Night Fury
07-11-2017, 03:43 AM
That horse mask answer is a disgrace.

+1000000000000 points.

Darth Ganon
07-11-2017, 07:11 AM
I suspect I know who Mr. Contestant 3 is for question #1. But I don't want to give anything away. :shrug:

07-11-2017, 07:50 AM
Fun fact: EoFF used to have merch. Also an arcade.

07-11-2017, 09:47 AM
Oh wow I love the answers in this round! I'm not going to vote right away, I need time! I'll read them again later and then make a decision. Maybe I'll vote tactically in this round :p

Del Murder
07-11-2017, 04:52 PM
Love that there is not one, but two mentions of lbpm. Also why did no one ever make a Loony BoB's Right Hand account? They would win MLT Get Together every time.

- loony bob penetrated me
07-11-2017, 05:18 PM
True story, I have a - in front of my user name because it embarrassed BoB to have my name pop up in suggestions when you tried to PM him.

Del Murder
07-11-2017, 05:21 PM
Still doesn't fix what happens when you type 'loony bob' in the member list search. ;)

EDIT: Well what do you know, there is a right hand account.

07-11-2017, 05:28 PM
EDIT: Well what do you know, there is a right hand account.When I saw you confirm this I thought "well, at least that one wasn't me" and to borrow a phrase, well what do you know, it was.

At least the original, loony bob kissed me, is a legitimate real person. The poor lad was a rando who merely wanted to join the EoFF Squad on Habbo Hotel and had to join the actual site as a rite of passage.

07-11-2017, 08:45 PM
I will curse this contest forever for bringing back the horrid posts of loony bob penetrated me.

07-11-2017, 08:49 PM
you can only blame yourself tbh

Del Murder
07-11-2017, 09:53 PM
The winner of Mr. EoFF should have an immediate thunderdome with lbpm to determine the true champion.

07-12-2017, 07:55 AM
I'm upset I didn't treat this competition more seriously.

07-13-2017, 01:11 AM
I'm upset I didn't treat this competition more seriously.

07-14-2017, 06:48 AM
The votes are in and counted. After these results we'll be down to the final two for Mr and Ms. Lets see who goes on to the final found.

Night Fury and Shauna make it to the finals.

Quina and Formy head on to the last round. The former Mr. psychotic has been knocked out.

Thank you everyone who made it to round two. These were some narrow wins.

For the final round the contestants will be sending in their answers to the following questions:

What's your favorite forum and why?
If your favorite recurring Final Fantasy theme?
Why do some chocobos say wark while others say Kweh?

Answers are due in by Sunday at 12pm Central Time.

Darth Ganon
07-14-2017, 06:57 AM
I'm fine. This is fine.


07-14-2017, 07:00 AM
You did well. One vote short of a tie, actually.

07-14-2017, 07:02 AM
Ah well, I had a good run! Congrats to all the misters.

Night Fury
07-14-2017, 07:29 AM
Oh damnit I actually forgot to send in my votes for that round!

Nice to see myself in the finals - thanks for all the votes!
Not happy to go up against my sister, Shauna, for the crown though. There might be blood! :o

07-14-2017, 08:34 AM
There will be blood. Love blood.

That was creepier than I intended.

Night Fury
07-14-2017, 08:54 AM
TIL: Shauna is a vampire.

07-14-2017, 10:31 AM
Congratulations Shauna, Night Fury, Quina and Formy! I'm honesty surprised I made it as far as I did.

07-14-2017, 12:44 PM
Right so, I was SURE I knew who Mr EoFF #2 was (well, down to two people) until that Vocaroo. Now I am absolutely stumped (well, not absolutely, I have narrowed down between a different 2 people, and leaning more heavily to one than the other).

But dang! You're a funny dude. xDNow I'm out I may as well confirm this was me. I'm glad my accent on the Vocaroo blagged someone. :greenie:
Oh damnit I actually forgot to send in my votes for that round!I could've still been in this thing if you'd voted for my horse answer! :colbert: I am now firmly on #teamshauna

07-14-2017, 07:48 PM
Thank you for continuing to vote for me to be president of EoFF. One quick question, does the winner get to eat the loser? Just wondering because Formalhaut looks so tasty.

07-17-2017, 08:02 AM
#teamshauna completely forgot to do this. I'll get it done by the end of the day ;_;

07-17-2017, 05:44 PM
That second question was meant to be what is your favorite recurring theme, which I somehow typed wrong because I was tired. I also had to go out of town and didn't make it back quickly, so haven't been able to look at the answers yet and waiting until the end of the day is fine, since you're not the only one who hasn't sent in answers yet.

07-17-2017, 05:48 PM
Gosh I have not looked at this for awhile! Gah! Thank you so much everyone who's voted for me so far!

I will get my final round answers in now. :D

07-19-2017, 03:03 AM
The answers are in and its time to vote for who will be the Mr and Ms of EOFF. Votes are due in by Friday evening.


Contestant 1: Probably the Roman Forum. I mean, just check out how beautiful this thing is!


What an insight into the wonders of the past, amirite?


Oh, you were talking about online.


Contestant 2: I love The Lifestream, because I love seeing the vulnerability and the 'real life' of all the members of the forum. I definitely joined EoFF to chat about Final Fantasy, but I've stayed for the people, and seeing such amazing threads in The Lifestream keeps me coming back.

Seeing some of the things you guys go through in your daily lives, and are willing to share inspires me. It encourages me to share and divulge too. It's so rare to find a 'safe place' (sorry for using that term!) on the internet where people behave and act in a decent way - especially when even on here we can lose ourselves in political debate and start attacking each other, it's nice that when it comes to personal stuff we are all able to act in a loving way towards each other and put the silly political arguments aside.

Contestant 1:
Definitely the main theme.


Contestant 2: There are so many amazing recurring themes throughout Final Fantasy, and I think that's why as a series, it remains so beloved. There are icons that are just so synonymous with Final Fantasy like Chocobos, Moogles, Tonberrys, and Cactaurs... The fact that these creatures turn up time and time again and alway seem to fit into the world is just a testament to how creative and artistic the Final Fantasy team is. They keep a lot of their themes so fresh and relevant.

I'm not the biggest fan of Final Fantasy XV by any stretch, but the theme of friendship and teamwork was so strong that despite it being so different to other titles in the series, it was able to still have that Final Fantasy feel.

The themes in Final Fantasy are the very essence of the series. Whether it's the music and melodies that we all know and love, or the creatures, or even the thematic motifs in the storyline. I don't know that I could pick just one thing that stand out to me, I really couldn't. I think if I had to though, I would choose the Final Fantasy theme. Something about hearing that, in all of it's versions throughout each entry in which it appears just becomes almost the breath of Final Fantasy. It's always the music of victory and completion - and it's kind of pompous but in a good way....


Contestant 1: How culturally insensitive of you to ask such a question! It's clearly just a difference in dialect and we will speak no further on this matter.

Contestant 2: Because some are from Scotland and they say WARK and the ones from England go KWEH. And when they meet, they can totally understand each other, and they don't care at all - but the humans of the world are the ones who act so baffled and worried about this strange Chocobo dialect...


Contestant 1: Eyes on Final Fantasy is my favorite forum. I guess you wanted me to be more specific. OK, the website eyesonff.com, founded by Cid, owned by Loony BoB, ran by the Cid's Knights, where people talk about Final Fantasy and other random things, debate about politics, share their deepest secrets, play silly forum contests, meet their best friends and the loves of their lives, and continue to find magic after almost two decades on an internet that changes trends ever few months, is my favorite forum, website, and community in the entire world.

Contestant 2: Oh, that's a good one. It's really hard because I like all the forums for different reasons.

Quina's Kitchen is always good a laugh. I fondly remember discussing the finer points of soup, the etymology of how we say 'chicken sandwich' over 'chicken burger', the correct method of preparing scones, and so on. Without getting too in-depth, food unites us in a way other things couldn't. Long may it continue, I say.

I also really Academia. Now I know things can get way too heated in there, but when discussion hits that right note, it can be really engaging and entertaining for all the right reasons. And while there's a few people who I often disagree with on some matters, I appreciate that most of the time we can disagree in a good way.

If nothing else it's a great way to just bitch about Trump, Theresa May, or anything else going on in the world at the moment.

I'm lumping General Chat and Wonder Square together because WS is now in GC, but I've really enjoyed talking shop in both. Some of my favourite memories are of organising the annual EoFF Secret Santa, forgetting to pre-format the posts, and then spending literally hours typing up the reveal posts all nice and formatted. Good times.

Oh, and I can't neglect to mention the Timber Maniacs sub-forum, A.K.A the writer's forum. I don't post in there as often as I should sometimes, but it has genuinely inspired me, and I love cheering on other people's writing whenever I have the memory or time to pop in there. I also won my first Ciddie through getting Best Writer, so I mean, thanks?

But in case you were dreading me go through every sub-forum, don't worry, I'm stopping at this last one.

The Lifestream. It was called Eyes on Each Other for awhile when I was here. Different name, same place. I think this is my favourite sub-forum simply because it's members supporting other members. No fancy words required, it's simply brilliant, that.

I try not to post in The Lifestream very often because the thought of dedicating an entire thread to myself makes me feel sick, but the times I have needed to go in there, the times where my desperation outweigh my social esteem, I tell you truly I have never regretted it. The people who support you in there are amazing people. And it isn't even for earthshattering problems. Even small things - the kind of things that go in the Rant Thread sometimes - even small things that annoy you get an audience.

I suppose the Lifestream is amazing because it shows people care about you. Not your opinions on FFXV, not what you had for breakfast, but they care about you, and that, is a very powerful thing.

Contestant 1: This question does not seem complete. To cover all my bases, I will answer every possible variation I can think of.

If your favorite recurring Final Fantasy theme was not in the next FF game, would you still play it?
I would probably still play it if it had compelling characters and story and fun battles and did not take 10 years to make after several redesigns and overteased announcements dulling the whole experience.

If your favorite recurring Final Fantasy theme played on every radio station every day, would you get sick of it?
No I would not because I don't listen to the radio.

If your favorite recurring Final Fantasy theme was written by a Nazi, would you punch it?
I do not condone violence, unless it is to weaken something so I can eat it and get its power. (And I am not interested in Nazi powers!)

If your favorite recurring Final Fantasy theme was something lame like a shallow contrived love story, how would you feel about yourself?
Not very good, but I guess I could get over it quickly by watching daytime TV.

If your favorite recurring Final Fantasy theme killed your father, would you swear your revenge?
I would, but I would draw out my revenge over two movies by first going through its underlings in order to maximize box office revenue.

If your favorite recurring Final Fantasy theme covfefe?
No can eat.

Contestant 2: I'm trying to remember what recurring musical themes there are. There's the Opening Prelude, of course. And the Chocobo Theme. Oh, Battle on the Big Bridge. I guess you could count 'Airship Theme' as being recurring.

Oh, I'll go for the Chocobo Theme, because Chocobo. If you wanted me to choose my favourite of those: FFIII's theme is really simple but benefits from its simplicity. FFV's Mamba de Chocobo theme has a really funky rhythm, and the man's interjections make it even better, FFVII's Electric de Chocobo is a fun surfer theme, and I really liked FFXIII's Pulse Chocobo theme even if it is busier than the others.

I think overall though, I'll go for Death Metal Chocobo.


Contestant 1: There are two types of chocobos in this world:

Some say "kweh", think Star Wars is better than Star Trek, are better at science than at art, like FFVI more than FFVII, and prefer ice cream to cake.

Some say "wark", vote Republican, prefer the newer Final Fantasy games, call soda "pop", and think soup is a drink.

Contestant 2: I am not a professor of animal linguistics, but I think they're the same species, but have domesticated themselves in different regions and so have developed their language differently.

Or, perhaps it's based on the sex of the Chocobo?

Or maybe it's to do with evolution?

Or maybe the Chocobos that Kweh have been bred and trained to sound that way because it sounds more appealing to prissy owners who want their Chocobos to sound better than those upstart Smiths down the road.

Look at them, splashing their money out on a Green Chocobo. Must've dipped into their child's college fund for that. We'll show them. Our Chocobo will beat them in the Chocobo Singing Pageant. Their Chocobo can only Wark in five languages. Our Chocobo can Kweh on command, and in different pitches. And it can Wark on top of that too; all we have to do is grip its testicles tightly and it'll go into a falcetto Wark.

Alas, the life of a Chocobo Breeder is a strange and mysterious one.

I'm excited to see who the winner will be. Get to voting!

Del Murder
07-19-2017, 04:53 PM
May the best Qu win!

07-19-2017, 07:24 PM
Good luck, contestants! The £1 million prize fund is within arms reach!

Darth Ganon
07-22-2017, 07:15 AM
Oh yeah, voting. I almost didn't do the voting.

07-22-2017, 07:15 AM
Sitting on a tie and hoping for a couple more votes.

07-22-2017, 09:20 PM
Its time to announce the winners!

All four contestants had some great rounds, but the time has come to say who gets to be known as the Mr and Ms EOFF.

For the last round, contestant one was Shauna.
Night Fury was our second contestant, and her total vote count put her two ahead, making her the winner!
Congrats to our Ms EOFF.

In the male group contestant one was our lovely Quina.
Formy pulled ahead though, and with nine votes he can now be crowned our Mr EOFF.

Congrats to our winners and everyone who participated!

07-22-2017, 10:12 PM
Congratulations Night Fury & Formy on your new found Ms/Mr EoFF titles! Also a a big well done to the runners up, Shauna & Quina!

Now winners...




Night Fury
07-23-2017, 03:04 AM
Congratulations to everyone who participated! And congratulations to Shauna! Who is, in my mind, a much better Ms EoFF than myself in terms of character and care for the community. (And I voted for you) If it was a competition between us about who likes forum razzle dazzle the most... then yeah that's me.

I think that we're very lucky to have such an amazing female member base on this forum - especially given in recent years the backlash against women who wanted anything to do with video games. It's lovely that it doesn't matter here, and that we're encouraged to share our thoughts, opinions, experiences at Eyes on Final Fantasy. It's also lovely that, really the scales are quite even here in terms of the gender split.

Not only that, but our women support each other here, and we don't feel the need to succumb to the poisonous ideal that we should compete against each other within this niche. I mean, maybe we've had that in the past, but I think it's something we can look back on as being a part of youth and a little bit of immaturity.

It's beautiful to see some of the transformations of our ladies in the years that I've been here. Freya - to see who you are today, and just how much your strength, ambition, and class comes through is wonderful. Shauna - your confidence in yourself is beyond, and I know it's something that you've been on the line about, but you handle yourself with such grace and humour and I aspire to be like you - cool, calm, collected, and confident. Pumpkin - just wow, you have gone from someone so softly spoken to someone so passionate about your field and able to communicate your message in a beautiful way with confidence. Watching you pat yourself on the back to celebrate your wins is great to see, and I can't wait to see where your journey takes you next.

And congrats to my Mr! Formy! It's been so lovely to get to watch you on your journey over the last few years and see your transform and become who you are today, because there's an amazing person in there.


Anyway, there's my lame speech, always overdramatic.

Darth Ganon
07-23-2017, 04:02 AM

07-23-2017, 05:16 AM
Congratulations Formalhaut and Shauna. I hope you make beautiful babies together.

07-23-2017, 07:51 AM
Congratulations to you both!

I must admit I thought Quina would walk it and I voted for its answers for all three. I got it wrong and assumed people preferred funny answers to heartfelt ones just because I do. I should've realised that when I got dumped out in the last round! Either way, very well played Formy!

Night Fury
07-23-2017, 08:42 AM
I think both heartfelt and funny are great but honestly just be 100% you and write what is authentic for you. That's what I did anyway /shrug

07-23-2017, 08:45 AM
Oh yeah sorry I wasn't trying to say your answers weren't funny! I voted for you on this and indeed other rounds a hell of a lot too.

Night Fury
07-23-2017, 08:57 AM
Oh yeah sorry I wasn't trying to say your answers weren't funny! I voted for you on this and indeed other rounds a hell of a lot too.

Oh that's not what I meant! I liked my answers because I was as honest as possible. To be honest though, this was a very tough competition and it was nice to see all answers from each contestant! :)

07-23-2017, 10:22 AM
Congrats guys. Deserved wins all round.

I mean, if there was any doubt that Night Fury deserved it, look at the beautiful speech she wrote, and remember that I would have celebrated my win with an Adventure Time gif.

But now I get to celebrate yours with one.

Formy, Tara: You are both


07-25-2017, 04:33 PM
Formalhaut hasn't even swung by to claim his prize! Terrible.

A big thanks to hero for running this ol' thing. :3 I had a good time trying to come up with terrible answers to all the questions.

07-25-2017, 04:56 PM

A lot of thanks to WK for helping me come up with some of the questions, too.