Telemarketers...

[K-chan]

Fun things to do to a telemarketer... I'll start off with a few. ^_^

1. Say "AT&T, how may I help you?". The telemarketer has a GOOD chance of being with AT&T (and it makes for one hilarious arguement)

2. start speaking in another language (or make up one if you don't know any)

3. Ask then, hypothetically, what they'd do if you just happened to be on the Do Not Call list. (they usually hang up PRETTY darn fast)

4. convince them that your crazy (like ask if the angels talk to them as well.)

Anyone else have any good ones?

[Rye]

Pretend that they're your ex girlfriend/boyfriend and tell them that it's over and to stop calling.

[Meow]

"One moment please, my modem is in Bangladesh."

[bennator]

hang up, immediatly

[Cz]

Toy with them. Pretend to be really interested in their product. Blab on about how you really could use some double glazing. Add in as many dull anecdotes as possible, while continuing to sound enthusiastic. Then, when you're done, and they ask whether you'd actually like to buy the product, give them a pleasant yet firm 'No, but have a nice day anyway.' and hang up.

[Logan]

I always say, excuse me, I'm interested but I have someone on the other line, can you hold on two seconds? And then hang up. :)

[kikimm]

i rarely ever answer the phone. But when I do, and it is a telemarketer, I usually just hang up. I feel bad, but hey-they're asking for it.


:D

[War Angel]

How about a polite 'No thank you, have a fine day, bye'? You know, they are people, just like the rest of us. It's never fun to get hung up on, or be treated rudely. So, be nice.

[Yamaneko]

I just say no thanks and hang up.

[Shlup]

BJ usually makes them go through their whole shpeel and then tells them why he doesn't want it, or starts saying "Que" and "No hablas" and such.

I usually pretend to be a little girl. It's not a big stretch.

[square_is_the_best]

When they say is your father home or something, I give it to him. He takes care of the rest. :D

[TasteyPies]

I never get telemarketers, just people doing surveys.

So I either set the phone down and walkaway or hang up.

[Psychotic]

Burst into a rendition of "The Night is Young and You're so Beautiful" then when you finish, tell them that you just wanted them to know that, then hang up.

[Dr Unne]

Don't answer the phone. Problem solved.

[Ravin]

1: Pick up the phone and yell as loud as humanly possible.

2: Act like your in a fight (and taking a good beating) while talking with them.

3: Just start arguing about purely idiotic and stupid things.

[escobert]

Since they uslually call me when I'm eating I just say "what time do you eat?" and they say "when I get out of work or whenever" and I say "Well give me your home phone number and I'll call you there at that time."

[Kirobaito]

Oh, geez, tell them that you're not the man or woman of the house. If they ask if they may speak to the man or woman of the house, say "Uh, they're taking a massive [poop] right now." Most of the time the person will burst into laughter and say "okay, bye". However, if they say "Do you know when they will be available" say "Oh, I dunno, he's been in there awhile, no telling when his diarrhea medicine will finally kick in." :D

[-N-]

Ask them out on a date. Even if they are the same gender. And then call them while they are eating dinner, if you get that far, player. :D

[Erdrick Holmes]

God, ****ing HATE TELMARKETERS. I swear next telemarketer thatcalls I <i>will</i> cuss up a storm at them.

[Del Murder]

I tell them I'm not interested and then hang up. It's cruel, I know.

[Baloki]

TeleMarketer (TM): Hello, I'm ringing from Tiscalli and am ringing to ask if your interested in buying our whole sale Broadband Package.

Baloki (B): You are? I'll sell it to you for £35 a month, how does that sound?

TM: Sir I don't think you quite understand, we are selling this product to you.

B: And I am selling you my current Broadband Package from BT.

TM: I see...

B: However I could sell you my cat, or my dog? Their going cheap, interested?

TM: Urm sir, I'm not interested, have you ever thought of switching to Tiscalli?

B: Well once I did fall off a Tiscalli and shouted BLUE MURDER, BLUEEE MURDERRR!!!!

TM: urm, sir...?

B: *Rattles the phone*, hello this is the QEQM Mental health wing, sorry about that but Johnny has only just got over killing people, I'm nurse Jenkings, how may I help?

TM: *Puts the phone down and never rings again*

[Silmaril]

Why not make pleasant conversation with them? I'm sure they'll appreciate it.

[RSL]

I was a telemarketer for about a month back in high school. From personal experience, it didn't hurt our feelings to get hung up on. That's was preferable to getting told that the person you are asking to talk to just died that day. The first time you hear that you feel bad. After the tenth or so time you just say sorry and go onto the next call.

Anyway, now that I'm not a telemarketer, I hang up on them the minute I figure out that they are a telemarketer. It's best for me, it's best for them.

[Rainecloud]

"I appreciate the fact that you're trying to earn a living, but I don't want to buy any of your crap".

Thanks.