Married With Children

[Dingo Jellybean]

Anyone seen this show? I know the last season aired in 99 or something, but it was one of my favorite shows of all time. I'm surprised it didn't make TV Guides' best shows of all time, because Friends is SO overated. The script is so ditsy and simple, I don't know how so many people can like it. Their isn't an ounce of talent between any of the 6 cast members IMO.

Anyways, MWC had a lot of bathroom humor and such and while the script wasn't too much better than Friends'...Ed O'Neal was the main catalyst for the show. My dad was the one who introduced me to the show, he use to watch it non-stop. Now they don't even play reruns anymore. But that whole Bundy family...so damn hilarious. It's odd how the Bundys are so poor yet their nextdoor neighbors are so rich.

One of my favorite moments from the show was how Al had a super remote that changes the channels of other TVs hundreds of yards away. Then Jefferson came over and wondered why his TV kept changing channels. XD I swear, other than Seinfeld, no other show has made me laugh so much. It was something that at first was kind of over the top, and some compared Al Bundy to Archie Bunker, but I think Al Bundy was a bit more subdued and that was the selling point for America. I loved it...I miss the show so much. I think their were 9 seasons, but only the first 3 seasons are on DVD AFAIK.

[Rye]

If this is the show I think you're talking about, then I really like it. The one show I'm thinking of has the bald father and the wife that is a little big, and has the genius kid who has a crush on the little girl.

It's either that show or the one with the son, Junior, with the big head who got his girlfriend pregnant.

[Logan]

I used to watch it when I was little and my dad would tell me to stop watching trash. I watch reruns whenever I can find them.

Kelly was so dumb. "It's better to have loved and lost than never to have seen 'Lost in Space' at all"

But I liked her. :D

[Del Murder]

Al Bundy is one of the greatest television characters of all time. This show was a classic.

[magus19]

MWC is probably THE best show that was ever aired
Al Bundy is THE personification of every working man, which is why i like him.

[fire_of_avalon]

Al Bundy is one of the greatest television characters of all time. This show was a classic.
GOLD STAR. We used to watch that show as a family, and we still do when we catch re-runs on F/X. *cough cough Dingo it still comes on cough*

[Casey]

Al Bundy is one of the greatest television characters of all time. This show was a classic.

I agree also.

Also that song by Frank Sinatra is cool, :D


Love and marriage, love and marriage
Go together like a horse and carriage
This I tell you brother
You can’t have one without the other

Love and marriage, love and marriage
It’s an institute you can’t disparage
Ask the local gentry
And they will say it’s elementary

Try, try, try to separate them
It’s an illusion
Try, try, try, and you will only come
To this conclusion

Love and marriage, love and marriage
Go together like a horse and carriage
Dad was told by mother
You can’t have one without the other

[Crazy the Clown]

Best line of the show? "No fish will ever touch my grill."

When I get my own hibachi, I'm going to follow that rule like a religion. Beef, pork, and poultry, only. And ain't no one gonna break it.

[starlet]

Al Bundy is one of the greatest television characters of all time. This show was a classic.
Yeah you gotta love it when he put his hand about 2 inches into his pants. :twak:

[Del Murder]

'A fat woman walked into the shoe store today. She asked for something that would fit comfortable. I said try Wyoming.'

'Good news. I got them to take another hundred bucks off the car. I mean, who needs seat belts when you don't have brakes?'

'What was I thinking when I said 'I do' ? I'd already had sex with her so I didn't need that again.'

'I never wanted to get married, I got married. Never wanted kids, I have 2 of them. Why the hell am I here?'

'Peg, when you married me, was it pre-meditated or a drive-by marriage?'

'The home shopping network! There's a good idea for women! It was a little too hard driving to the mall with a couch strapped to their ass.'

'Six bucks is too much money to spend on any woman.'

'That's the sound of the axel hitting the ground. That means one of two things. Either Peg's family's in town or everybody in China just jumped off a chair.'

'Why is it that Elvis is dead but I'm in hell?'

'Peg, I suspect your mind, much like the lost continent of Atlantis, no longer appears on any map.'

I'f daddy gets the (electric)chair, will you sit on his lap one last time?'

'I'm not paying for mistakes. I've been doing that since I got married.'

'This is my week off, so pack up, get the kids and I'll see you in a week.'

'Am I truly nothing? Could the neighbourhood children be right?'

'Computers and women are ruining the country.'

'You remember that time when we were dating? And we took that walk on Augstreet beach at sunset? The wind was blowing through your hair and you got cold, so I gave you back your jacket.'

'She's got you shaking like a frenchman in a thunderstorm.'

'Now son, look here, these redwood-trees they're over a thousand years old. I'm gonna cut me one of these down and use for a base for my satellite dish.'

'Well that God person, what do you think she looks like?'

'I deserve to be punished, I married your mother.'

'We all have to live with our disappointments... I have to sleep with mine.'

'Life with the wife out of town. Now this is marriage.'

'Expired driver's license. Why can't a marriage license do that?'

'There's two things that the Bundy's don't do. We don't eat vegatables and we don't tap.'

'A man is a man all his life. A woman is only sexy until she becomes your wife.'

'Peg, did your mother get so fat she spread across the border?'

'Run like Mexican water through a first-time tourist.'

'Envy me. That's my wife. Those are my kids and I sell womens' shoes.'

'The opera isn't over until the last heterosexual falls asleep.'

'Marcy, the part with the cups goes in front.'

'Women, you can't live with 'em, you can't herd them all into Canada...'

'I saw women today that would make General Scharzkopf carry the white flag.'

'It's bad enough that I know we're married, do we have to let the whole world know?'

'I'm not selling shoes for the money. I'm in it to torutre fat women.'

'I've lived and I've loved... later on I even married.'

'People who work putting shoes on fat women who wear dresses should not have 20/20 vision.'

'The brain doesn't need blood. It just needs to be kept wet.'

'Christmas is no time for regrets, that's what wedding anniversaries are for.'

'I've got a woman so lame that she actually thinks that when I groan during sex it has anything to do with her.'

'I hate my life ... can't eat, can't sleep, can't bury my wife in the backyard.'

'I married you 'til death do us part. So when I'm dead, I'm free to date.'

'I haven't showered in a week so I think I better get right to bed...'

'This country has been run far too long by people who know the issues.'

'Peg, you can stab me with knives, you can beat me with clubs, you can make me open my eyes when we're having sex but there's no way on earth you can make me get a second job.'

'Behind every successful man is a woman who didn't marry me.'

'Soon our mouths will be alive with dead animals of every race and religion.'

'Peg we've been married for 17 years. Can't we just be friends?'

'Why go out for milk when you've got a cow at home.'

'That's what being a man is like: making mistakes and not caring.'

'Except for the day before the day I met you, Peg, this is the happiest day of my life.'

'If I could just help one kid not marry, my job is done.'

'Insurance is like marriage. You pay and pay but you never get anything back.'

'Sure selling shoes is fun. But behind the glamour, it's like any other minimum wage slow death.'

'It gets better each time as long as it's never with the same woman.'

'I left high-school, lost the will to live and here I am...'

'I don't HAVE to go to sleep after sex. I WANT to go to sleep after sex. I welcome the darkness.'

'Love is not only blind but stupid.'

'Life didn't pass me by, it sat on my head.'

'It's only a game if you win but if you lose it's a stinking waste of time.'

'Milwaukee. That's the town they build around you mother isn't it, Peg?'

'Bud, we don't throw away everything that doesn't work. If that was the case, you wouldn't have a mother.'

'If you want to have sex, the kids have to leave, and if you want it to be good, your wife have to leave.'

'If God had wanted women to play ball, he would've made them men.'

'I saw your mother naked and everything went black!!! I think my eyes were trying to protect my heart!!!'

'The American justice system works! Beat the crap out of people before the judges let them go!'

'Four weddings and a funeral, where's the difference?'

'I wish the world was a fly and I'm a giant rolled up newspaper.'

'I wouldn't rub your feet if a genee popped out of them.'

'Kids take a good long look. This is worth a thousand condom commercials.'

'A man's home is his coffin.'

'Health people are like dinosaurs. They're not fit to survive.'

'Anything that's good enough for the cockroach is good enough for my family.'

'None today! Tomorrow, twice as much!'

'We haven't had any kids in over 10 years. I must be doing something right.'

'I'm jealous of everyone not married to you.'

'Women, you can't live with'm, the end.'

[HIK248]

Married with children=The best tv series of all time,bar none
Al Bundy=The ultimate God of the Universe

Then this woman comes in who doesn't speak English. She points at the shoes, I point at the door. She points at the sky and then knees me in the nay-nays!"

"Let me explain. It’s just like an elevator. There’s a 2 ton weight limit on those shoes..."

"A customer walks into the shoestore today. A tall willowy brunette. She sits down and asks to try on a pair of size 12 pumps. So I sit down there, doing my business and I notice she's wearing a garter belt whick I like. All the time she'd smiling at me. Suddenly she uncrosses her legs like in Basic Instinct..... It was a guy!!!"

"A fat woman walked into the shoe store today. She was so fat, she had three smaller women orbiting around her."

"A woman comes into the shoestore today, so huge she's protected by GreenPeace. She asked for a pair of sixe 4 so I asked if she'd eat them here or take them home. Then she has the nerver to complain about my performnce!"

"A fat woman godzillas into the shoe store today, she asks for something she could wear to walk in the woods. Jokingly I suggest she wear a sign that says "Don't shoot! From the front I look human!"."

“A fat woman came into the shoe store today. Wanted a pair of shoes for a Christmas party. I told her to stand on her hands, put a star in her butt and go as the world’s largest, ugliest tree!”

A little kid and his mum are in the store. The kid says "I want a balloon" and Al replies (looking at the fat mother) "You've already got one!".

"Then a woman comes into the store, with a crocked nose and asked for something that will make her pretty. I told her that it will take a long time until someone that ugly to come and stand near her"


Psycho Dad

Who's that riding into the sun.
Who's the man with the itchy gun.
Who's the man who kills for fun !

Psycho Dad. Psycho Dad. Psycho Dad !

He's quick with a gun, but he loves his son.
Killed his wife 'cause she weighed a ton... Psycho Dad !

Psycho Dad - New Theme Song

A little touched or so we're told.
Killed his wife 'cause she had a cold.
Might as well, she was gettin' old.

Psy-cho Dad, Psycho Dad, Psycho Dad.

He's quick with a gun, and his job ain't done.
Killed his wife by twenty-one, he's Psy-cho Dad !

The Psycho Dad Christmas Episode

Who's that riding in the sleigh.
Who's that firing along the way.
Who's got the most popped on christmas day ?

Psy-cho Dad, Psycho Dad, Psycho Dad.


The New Adventures Of Psycho Dad

Who is the tall, dark stranger there.
The one with the gun and the icy stare.
The one with the scalp of his ex-wife's hair.

Psy-cho Dad, Psycho Dad, Psycho Dad !

He's a durn good pa, but he hates the law.
He's likes to eat it raw, Psycho Dad !


The New Adventures Of Psycho Dad 2

Who's that ridin' across the plain.
Who's lost count of the wives he's slain.
Who is the man who's plum insane !

Psy-cho Dad, Psycho Dad, Psycho Dad !

[TheAbominatrix]

I loved psycho dad! My dad still sings that song.

I loved MWC, and I think my favorite episode was when Al took his 'vacation', in front of the tv. He roped off the couch and pretended he was somewhere else... classic.

My family always watched it together, and my Uncle would always sign his Christmas cards to 'Al and Peg' when he sent them to us.

[Armisael]

I remember watching it when i was little with all my family..

It was so funny..Especially the opening song with Bundy sitting on the couch and giving everyone money..

Surely one of the best tv series ever..^_^

[Agent Proto]

I love that show. It was definitely one of my favorite shows to watch. There's also a similar show with the stuffed talking bunny, Unhappily Ever After. These shows about dysfunctional families are great.

[DMKA]

Yes, that show was classic. It came out when I was very young and lasted about 10 years, and then I saw it end. I was sad...it was hands down one of the best television shows ever, and the most realistic sitcom. :p

[TheAbominatrix]

The end was great too. I really enjoyed those rare moments when it was clear that they really did love eachother. They spent all this time insulting eachother and all that, but they loved eachother anyway. It was sweet.

[Calliope]

What a great show.

I hate Marci. Ugh.

[Del Murder]

'Marcy...oh, sorry son. Marcy... oh, sorry son. Hey, little boy, have you seen my.. oh! Marcy!'

[612904398619]

yeah that shows awesome. i remember one time when bud received a love letter from a girl and he thought kelly was playing a trick on him. and so peg says something like "why do you keep thinking kelly wrote that love letter?" and bud goes something like, "because it says april, may, june. those are words that kelly know!"