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View Full Version : Does anybody feel like they're a disappointment?



Social Moon Firesky
03-31-2005, 04:15 PM
Have you ever felt like you are a big embarrassment to your family, or that your parents secretly wish you'd never been born/turned out differently?

Misfit
03-31-2005, 04:18 PM
Yeah! I don't know why, though!

kikimm
03-31-2005, 04:19 PM
Nope. I don't get that "vibe" from them; never have, and I hope I never will. I hope you don't either.


:D

Social Moon Firesky
03-31-2005, 04:20 PM
I do sometimes. Like when I've done something stupid, which is quite often. I just hate the feeling that I have to impress them all the time.

disapointedchild
03-31-2005, 04:23 PM
Ha you make me laugh.

(THEN CRY)

Nod
03-31-2005, 04:24 PM
why waste your time obeying the opinions of others.
or as i prefer to say, 'fuck em'.

kikimm
03-31-2005, 04:32 PM
I do sometimes. Like when I've done something stupid, which is quite often. I just hate the feeling that I have to impress them all the time.

=( Even though I don't know you or your family, I'm positive that your parents are glad, and always will be glad that they had you. Maybe I'm using this the wrong way, but your friends know when you've done something stupid, right? They still love you after you've done it; usually parents' love is more unconditional than friends. But if that's not what you meant, then forget you ever read that. :p

I wouldn't worry about it, personally. But if it's really bothering you, I would definitley talk to them about it. I wouldn't want to live with that constantly on my mind.


:D

Citizen Bleys
03-31-2005, 04:35 PM
I'm usually the one being disappointed by others.

Megami
03-31-2005, 04:35 PM
=( Even though I don't know you or your family, I'm positive that your parents are glad, and always will be glad that they had you. Maybe I'm using this the wrong way, but your friends know when you've done something stupid, right? They still love you after you've done it; usually parents' love is more unconditional than friends. But if that's not what you meant, then forget you ever read that. :p

I wouldn't worry about it, personally. But if it's really bothering you, I would definitley talk to them about it. I wouldn't want to live with that constantly on my mind.


:D

*nods*

Your parents love you and everything they do is for your own good.

Believe me :love:

Social Moon Firesky
03-31-2005, 04:52 PM
Ya, I know. Although sometimes they yell at me when something isn't my fault, but everyone's parents do that at some point, right?

boris no no
03-31-2005, 05:09 PM
parents are like that.
my parents wanted aboy, they were told that i was a boy as i have a slow heart beat.
but when i turned out to be a gorl i think they were disapointed.
how i see it though is that if they are silly enough to think that then its not worth being sad.
we've been having so many family problems recently....
its hard but we learn to get trhough things.

Social Moon Firesky
03-31-2005, 05:11 PM
Well, it's good that you're strong enough to do that.

theundeadhero
03-31-2005, 05:49 PM
I hate to sound Grandpa-ey, but these are normal. Its part of growing up. As you grow up you become more of an individual instead of "just like your parents". Sometimes you feel bad that you can't be exactly the way they want you to but theres nothing wrong with it. Your going to be an individual and they will accept it. Sometimes not right away, but it will happen.

XxSephirothxX
03-31-2005, 05:55 PM
I'd say I get disappointed with myself, but don't feel like my family is disappointed in me...at least, not very often.

m4tt
03-31-2005, 06:00 PM
And, Matt, you know I love you, but, lets face it, Kishi is more of an asset to EoFF than you are.What do YOU think?

Chris
03-31-2005, 06:01 PM
No, I'm not overtly noticed nor am I totally invisible.

crazybayman
03-31-2005, 06:23 PM
Don't worry about it. ;) Parent's love is unconditional. They love you for who you are, just the way you are, regardless how mad they get with you sometimes.

Chris
03-31-2005, 06:25 PM
Don't worry about it. ;) Parent's love is unconditional. They love you for who you are, just the way you are, regardless how mad they get with you sometimes.

I'm sorry to say this, but that's unfortunately untrue.

Shlup
03-31-2005, 06:47 PM
Nope. I don't get that "vibe" from them; never have, and I hope I never will. I hope you don't either.


:D

Strider
03-31-2005, 06:51 PM
Yeah.

eestlinc
03-31-2005, 06:54 PM
when i turned out to be a gorl i think they were disappointed.

http://users.netride.net/dhill/EXPLOSION/GORL.JPG

Ouch!
03-31-2005, 06:55 PM
I get that feeling quite often. I never doubt that they love me, but over the past couple years I've put them through hell and I know that they wish that I didn't have the problems I do, not only for my sake, but for their's as well.

I'm not proud of how I've treated them in the past, but my actions sometime lead me to believe there's time when they may hate me. The worst part is that I deserve it.

Megami
03-31-2005, 06:59 PM
I'm sorry to say this, but that's unfortunately untrue.


I disagree :eek: How can that be untrue? They are parents..They have done everything for us.

What would be of you without them? :love:

Yamaneko
03-31-2005, 07:02 PM
I'm pretty much a disappointment to humanity.

Heath
03-31-2005, 07:09 PM
I'm sorry that you feel that way, Yams. As little as it probably means, you're probably one of the staffers I respected most at FG during your time there, and I doubt you're a disappointment to anything, myself.

I have felt that I've disappointed my parents on several occasions, though through my good school reports I mostly get the feeling that they are happy with me.

I'm sorry if any of your parents or anyone considers you a disappointment. As optimistic as it is, I agree with Megami, however there are exceptions.

Dr.K
03-31-2005, 07:12 PM
I feel that I've gradually become slightly more and more of a dissapointment as time has moved on. Nothing sizeable at all yet, but I have some extremely pressing problems I'm on the verge of revealing to them and well, I'm not sure what it'll be like after that.
However, I wouldn't say I fit the generic 'runt of the litter' bill though.

crazybayman
03-31-2005, 07:13 PM
I'm sorry to say this, but that's unfortunately untrue.

It is true. If its not, then there's something psychologically wrong. Its a biological fact that human parents love their offspring unconditionally.

Man, you can kill one of your parents, and the other parent will still love you. They'd be mad as hell, and maybe even send you to jail because you deserve it. But they'd still love you.

Leene
03-31-2005, 07:26 PM
I feel like that sometimes. :(
about that they wish i'd never been born they have never say this to me,but when parents say this to their child i thing that they don't mean it! :)

Rye
03-31-2005, 07:37 PM
Yes. My parents don't like me.

MecaKane
03-31-2005, 07:49 PM
And, Matt, you know I love you, but, lets face it, Kishi is more of an asset to EoFF than you are.
What do YOU think?
There's a huge difference between "this guy does a better job than you" and "you do a /xxx.gif/xxx.gif/xxx.gif/xxx.gifty job." Everyone's got someone better than them, it shouldn't be a huge attack to point that out to someone.

Aurey
03-31-2005, 07:50 PM
No, not one bit, because my mom's the greatest and she makes me feel the greatest.

That may have sounded cheesy, but it's the truth.

Sephex
03-31-2005, 08:35 PM
I have never really felt that I am a disappointment, but I have felt that I wish I had never been born before.

Sepho
03-31-2005, 08:51 PM
At times, I get a hint of it, but for the most part, not really. If anything, I have a little brother whose sort of the Black Sheep of the family, though I don't think that way about anyone, and I hope neither of my parents do, either. I know my dad has been disappointed in me before at specific times (and I've been disappointed in myself at those same times), but otherwise, I get along good with both of my parents (though my mom, especially) and they accept who I am as a person.

I hope you don't get that vibe, but if so, I'd like to think you can just shrug it off as being paranoid and having high expectations for yourself (the latter of which can be a good thing to an extent).

Ouch!
03-31-2005, 09:01 PM
Unconditional love does not exist. There is always something that someone can do to lose the love of those who believe to love you unconditionally, though often times nobody ever does anything that bad.

I strongly disagree that parents automatically unconditionally love their child no matter what. There are parents who disown their children. Disowning your child is far from a sign of love.

The Captain
03-31-2005, 09:11 PM
As many might tell you, parenting is not an exact science. There is no one way to be a good parent, and likewise there is no single way to be a good son or daughter. Parents will always care about you, and should love you from the very start, but in some households, the paternal instinct just isn't there because the parents cannot grasp it or are not prepared for it. In time, either this instinct does develop or the children end up fending for themselves, which is tragic and still an issue that needs more addressing in my opinion.

Being a good parent often requires learning how to temper expectation with individualism, and the same holds true for the son or daughter. While all parents probably want to expect their child to always get an A or be the captain of a sport, it is very important for all to remember that the best you can do is enough. If a child tries their hardest at something, the result should be appreciated and cherished even if it's not what the initial expectation was.

In all, the only person that any of us have to feel obliged to impress or live up to is ourselves. No one else has the unique experience of living our lives or knowing how we live them. To attempt to impress others can oftentimes be a greater burden than meets the eye, and doubly so if we are try to become what others wish us to be to live up to those expectations. All we can do is try our hardest and continue to live and grow as best we can. We can cherish the love that is given to us, and give it back. We can build up a healthy respect for others that might one day turn into love as well, with the hopes that this respect will be returned for the benefit of all.

Take care all.

Xander
03-31-2005, 11:18 PM
I feel like a disappointment to myself a lot. Just with being successful and talented and stuff, I don't feel like I've gone as far as I could have but..then I get over it and just carry on. ^^

Del Murder
04-01-2005, 01:49 AM
<!--
I'm pretty much a disappointment to humanity.
Do you see what you people did?-->

I'm trying, everyone. I really am.

Spammerman
04-01-2005, 02:00 AM
I do sometimes. Like when I've done something stupid, which is quite often. I just hate the feeling that I have to impress them all the time.


i feel the exactly the same away. My mom expects me to be the perfect kid and get straight A's

Ko Ko
04-01-2005, 09:33 AM
To my family, I had always been a dissappointment. I was never the same as the other kids and my father always hated me for being different.
I bet he won't hate me when I'm paying his pension :skull3:

Silmaril
04-01-2005, 05:21 PM
Yes.

Social Moon Firesky
04-01-2005, 07:12 PM
I try to be true to myself, but sometimes it causes tension with my family. My mum disagrees with my way of life and puts way too much pressure on me. Then, when I don't succeed, she acts like I let her down big time. It's horrible.

Dolentrean
04-02-2005, 03:07 AM
my parents are often disappointed in me. Not because of the choices I make, I make good choices, I have never tried drugs or smoking, I never drink, I get decent grades, I train in martial arts and I am a poet.
They are disappointed in me because of my personality, I am nice and I never pick on anyone, (an after affect of being picked on myself). But I am dark, I often have this feel about me that I hate everything, and my parents wont accept me. my parents are religious, I'm not, my parents expect me to be what they want me to be and I wont. I have done nothing to merit this, at least this strongly, yet it is still there. (also this is not an assumption, my mother has actually told me she dose not like the person I am)

My parents love me, but sometimes they just don’t like me.

-N-
04-02-2005, 05:04 AM
And, Matt, you know I love you, but, lets face it, Kishi is more of an asset to EoFF than you are.What do YOU think?
This is kinda funny in retrospect. Come to think of it, this was the shocker for me. :D

Meat Puppet
04-02-2005, 05:43 AM
Everyday.

black orb
04-02-2005, 06:29 AM
>>> Not yet but they`ll be disappointed very soon. :D

Yuber
04-02-2005, 08:15 AM
Well, both my parents are dead, and i live on my own, so i don't really have much contact with my family other than my younger cousin. I do feel though i need to set an example for him, as he's only 14,(i'm only 20, but quite a big difference imo) and i'm basically like an older brother to him.

I've done my fair share of stupid /xxx.gif/xxx.gif/xxx.gif/xxx.gif in the past, ranging from heavy heroin use to stealing, among other things, but things are starting to look quite a bit better, as i kicked the H and have a job now. The real key to success for me has been acquiring more and more empathy, and not taking people for granted, because once they die, all the /xxx.gif/xxx.gif/xxx.gif/xxx.gif that seemed trivial/everyday becomes quite a large issue.

I just try to live life one day at a time, enjoy myself, and not worry about things in general too much, because for me all that worrying ultimately leads to depression, anxiety, procrastination, among other things. Wasting away with depression and boredom just isn't my thing.

Fin Ramble.

smittenkitten
04-02-2005, 03:11 PM
wel u shud never be embarresed or think yourself as a dissapiontment everyone is special sure we were all imperfect and make mistakes in our life but we can also fix them but you just have to be strong and live each day as if it's your last(",)xXx

nik0tine
04-02-2005, 03:54 PM
So long as I don't dissapoint myself I don't really care.

Social Moon Firesky
04-02-2005, 08:40 PM
I know that parents' love is unconditional, but it is possible to forget that you love someone, as is often the case in my family...