The almighty Shinra Toilet

[Shoden]

what are your conspiricies for it? how many times do you flush it? do you even flush it? all sorts of questions

[Rye]

if u name cloud "Spikeyass" and flush da toilet 100 times, Palmer comes out of it and slaps ur ass lol.

[Shoden]

good one

[Mercen-X]

Toilet threads suck. Toilets suck. ShinRa's toilet sucks. ShinRa sucks. ShinRa is a toilet.

[Shoden]

go lick a duck!

[IceT]

If you name cloud 'Canman' and flush the shinra toilet 10.000 times, a monster named Towel appears out of the bathroom.

Towel is 100% composed out of cotton, it absorbs the element of water and is vulnerable to fire spells which deal double damage to Towel. Towel may or may not be vulnerable to lightning spells, that depends if the towel has been previously used by one or more person/people. If those people (mostly shinra employees) don't care about hygiene, Towel can deal poison damage because of the nearby urinals.

Make sure that before you battle Towel that you equip cloud with the buster sword. Because of the rediculous size of the buster sword, it can rip Towel into many pieces. This strategy can be grossly abused, just like W-Summon + KOTR + Mime. It has 50000 hp and 10000 mp and has an enemy skill called Towel Spank; Towel rolls itself up and spank any character for 9998 damage (use enemy skill materia to learn aforementioned enemy skill).

After the bloody hard fight, Towel surrenders and asks you a hygiene question: 'Do you use almost no or plenty toiletpaper?'. Potential answers you may choose are:

'Yes!' on which Towel replies: 'Don't you care about the trees!!? You are sick!!'
'No!' on which Towel replies: 'So that's why you have brown fingernails!!'

After selecting 'No!' (the correct answer) Towel is not pleased with your hygiene and gives you a toothbrush and toothpaste which increases your food chewing skill, a roll of toiletpaper for your daily toilet visits, three towels to clean your hands AND the TowelOfDoom Summon Materia !!!! This materia summons a large towel which cures ALL status ailments and passes various status ailments to the enemy while dealing 9999 damage PER spank to all enemies. 1 star = 1 spank, 2 stars = 2 spanks, ... when mastered for a whopping total off 5 spanks!!! (can not be abbused by quadra magic materia)

Thank you for reading all this, it was certainly very fun for me to write.

Seriously: I only flushed once.

[Beclem]

I wonder if when they were eavesdropping on the meeting in the vent, if any of them were thinking "God, I can't wait to go back and flush that toilet"

[kikimm]

When I played through the game, I think I flushed it about 20 times. Probably becuse of that cabinet in....Kalm, I think, where if you press it enough, Cloud shakes it and you get the potion, or whatever it is that was sitting on it.

No such luck with the toilet. =(


:D

[G SpOtZ]

ionno how many times i've flushed it. probably plenty, out of utter boredem.

[Thorn]

I flushed it twice, thinking the second time would produce a different text.

[theundeadhero]

I wonder if when they were eavesdropping on the meeting in the vent, if any of them were thinking "God, I can't wait to go back and flush that toilet"
It was more of a thought like, "Don't give me a raise will you. That's it! I'm never flushing the toilet again. Mwa ha ha ha! Stinky revenge.

[Slade]

I flush once before i go into the vent and once when i leave. Its a great feeling when you here that 'woosh' and thats when you know "My work here is done"

[Shoden]

XD Madness

[Dreddz]

wtf ?

[Cloud Lionheart]

When I played through the game, I think I flushed it about 20 times. Probably becuse of that cabinet in....Kalm, I think, where if you press it enough, Cloud shakes it and you get the potion, or whatever it is that was sitting on it.

No such luck with the toilet. =(


:D

BTW you get a ether

[redxiiii]

When I played through the game, I think I flushed it about 20 times. Probably becuse of that cabinet in....Kalm, I think, where if you press it enough, Cloud shakes it and you get the potion, or whatever it is that was sitting on it.

No such luck with the toilet. =(


:D

BTW you get a ether
Actually you get a megalixer.

[Shoden]

wrong again you get an uber-elixer and flush it 50K times you get the /xxx.gif/xxx.gif/xxx.gif/xxx.gif summon materia

[Aidan]

Toilet threads suck. Toilets suck. ShinRa's toilet sucks. ShinRa sucks. ShinRa is a toilet.

bahahaha humbug. spam 4tw

[KoShiatar]

I wonder why a thread like this never comes up for FF VI....there were the Empire toilets to flush there....

[Aidan]

i think mercen-x said the funniest thing on the forum, which is:

Toilet threads suck. Toilets suck. ShinRa's toilet sucks. ShinRa sucks. ShinRa is a toilet.

[Mercen-X]

Your appreciation is greatly appreciated, mon ami.

[Shoden]

because there is only one toilet and no one knows what use it is

[Destai]

I flushed it twice, thinking the second time would produce a different text.

[Shoden]

i flush it so many times for amusement i once got the ressurect materia for aeris
i got the Michael jackson summon materia and the star wars materia

[Rengori]

Flush the toilet 300 times after mastering Fire materia 20 times. Eventually, Cloud will say "I'm bored," and a third option will appear called "Clog toilet with Toilet Paper." Select that and flush the toilet another 8.3 million times. At that point, the ocean will be dry and Midgar and parts of Kalm will be flooded. You will recieve an Underwater Materia around the 800th flush, so don't panic about breathing. Then, after the Weapons are released, Emerald Weapon will suffocate due to a lack of water.

[Aidan]

hence already beating emerald, but the piping form midgar to the gold saucewr are connected, so it flooded the desert so ruby weapon is covered in mud and now has 300,000 health, making it vulnerable for attack. you can also go from the gold saucer beach to ruby weapon using the sub now.

also, if you go to janet jacksons house in nibelheim, she gives you her nipple ring in exchange for her brother frozen in carbonite, and you can wear the nipple ring as a bracelet and it has 12 materia slots, all double connected for half mp use, and has 99 magic evade, 99 evade, and 1 magic defense. it however, only has 2x ap :(. its not worth getting. tight on the nip if you ask me...

[Rengori]

Oh, and I forgot that the ShinRa Mansion will be flooded so Vincent is dead.

[Aidan]

thats a good thing, and this time, when you go to lucrecias cave, she mates with cait sith since you never met vincent, and they ditch cait sith since hes such a nuesance. then, when you get the hp shout at shinra tower, instead of giving it to cait sith, cloud uses it to publicly announce he wants to kill barret, then they have an epic battle, and appear out of nowhere form the death site that dyne died at, and this time, barret kicks cloud in the boy bits, thus knocking him off the cliff, thus they never save the world from meteor and they all have an extremely huge and delicious bar-be-q.

[Rengori]

Then Sephiroth stands on a smouldering crater once known as Gaia, and does a victory dance despite the fact that gravity has become a problem.

[Aidan]

and thus floats off to terra and invades the FFIX realm

[eestlinc]

please take the conversation to chat or messenger or PM.
too much conversation and too many stupid rumors and ridiculous posts.