how many people saw the R rated version of advent?

[Fire_Emblem776]

It is the same movie with differnt subtitles. It makes the movie much more interising than the real thing. And i was cracking up!! Here is a portion of the script.



Final Fantasy 7... You didn't really understand it 1996. And you're too distracted by fancy graphics to remember the plot now. Wasn't there some company called Shinra? And maybe they were using the Lifestream to make taffy? Factories full of delicious strands of fresh-pulled saltwater taffy... No, it couldn't have been about taffy, that's ridiculous. Millions of people wouldn't have bought a game about taffy. It must have been something meaningful, deep, and incredibly profound.Definitely, definitely, not about taffy. Maybe there was a meteor that was going to destroy the world? And maybe a robot chick named Jenova? Oh, wait, this was the game with Sephiroth, the prettiest girl in Nibelheim.He had a lot of mommy issues and was sad, but because LiveJournal didn't exist yet, he had to kill a lot of things instead of writing poetry. It's all coming back now, isn't it? The long hours you spent leveling up, the phallic imagery... The time you wasted getting Vincent and Yuffie... How you told your friends that you cried when Aeris died. How they laughed, oh how they laughed. And then one day...A fated day...After seventy hours of leveling up, of trying to beat Emerald and Ruby Weapon, of racing and breeding Chocobos you finally beat the game. 50 And, god damn it, the ending made no sense.Now it must finally be time to clear things up, right?They wouldn't screw you after all this time, right? Let's go.OK. Unfortunately for you, they spent the budget on graphics and got the script from Fanfiction.Net.

this is gold!!! Let me know if you want these subs to play with the movie.

[BackRoomKid]

LOL!!!!

PM me

[deejay]

ahaha..i want them!!

[Maxico]

Got them here if you want them.

I actualy did find them really funny. Which is strange.

[jaketidus]

That was soooooo funny WD WD WD WD... oh btw.. how did u re create the subtitles? did u use a program or something.. please share.. looks fun :)

[Fuzakeru]

-downloads and watches again-

I hope this is good. Will edit thoughts later! =D

[Winter Nights]

Not great, but still quite humorous. Kudos to whoever made that.

[Crazy4Tidus]

...here is a stupid question...
I downloaded the thing and extracted the files but how do I put it in the movie (or read it or however it becomes subtitles).

[Dreddz]

funny sometimes, boring others....

[Fuzakeru]

There were a few parts that had me holding my stomach cause I was laughing so hard.

Cloud: You died
Rufus: No, you see, I'm fine.
Cloud: There was an explosion.
Rufus: I ducked
Cloud: That's retarded!

( The exact dialouge but what I can remember )

and how Barret talked made me giggle.

Overall cute but some parts were a bit, 'blah'. ^_^ Kudos to however made it.

[BackRoomKid]

VERY VERY Funny! my kind of humor


i'd name all the parts that i loved...but i can't remember them, ahahaha

[?????]

DIRGE OF CERBERUS

[deejay]

...here is a stupid question...
I downloaded the thing and extracted the files but how do I put it in the movie (or read it or however it becomes subtitles).
Try using VLC player

[Fire_Emblem776]

do we all agree this is so much better

"why is their spoon their, thats werid cid."

i hope the administrators get to see this

[Sita Atis]

...here is a stupid question...
I downloaded the thing and extracted the files but how do I put it in the movie (or read it or however it becomes subtitles).

Download VLC media player. go to open file and select the movie file, then click subtitles and select the subtitle file, click okay.

:)

[Raven Nox]

do we all agree this is so much better

"why is their spoon their, thats werid cid."

i hope the administrators get to see this

Lonny BoB has already seen it. He left comments on the LJ entry with the subs I gave you. Scroll down a little, hun. :)

[One_WinGed_d3mon]

heehee whats with all this aeris thingy, i thought she was nice, keep bagging clouds mom rofl good fansub, brings a lil bit of humor to me good job whoever made it

[Shoden]

that was excellent especially Kadaj's confessions and Aeris's "I'm jesus now"

[?????]

DUDES! We can make our own AC parody!

You know the .srt file that you have to put in the same folder to get the subtitles to play? I got hold of the blank template for that. All anyone has to do is replace the lines with whatever they feel like!

I foresee the birth of a genre...ah, it feels good to be helping make internet history. :p

[Shoden]

Advent Children the EOFF remix.


Involve references to more obscene stuff, more random humour and references to eoff.

[One_WinGed_d3mon]

angelfire.com/ak6/boogeybeal2/bien-xvid-ff7.srt

an updated version i found on another forum, its more humorous than the original

[DarkLadyNyara]

Hillarious doesn't begin to cover it. :D Laughed myself sick.

[Sephicloud]

does anyone know if the US english release is going to release an R rated version, or is it just for subtitles?

[Painless]

Cloud: We'll have that coffee later.
Sephiroth: I... I'll bake lemon squares.

[TheAsianPianist]

ok i downloaded the files and the player, but the movie isnt showing up, whats the deal?

[Vyk]

Its stupid. The guy had no inspiration for some things and just pulled a lot out of his ass. There's like 3 parts of the movie where they do nothing but quote song lyrics. I don't consider that all that funny :/ And the incessant homosexual innuendos. I realize how "funny" that is to most people. But come on. That was border-line obsessive.

[Winter Nights]

I think it would have been funnier if they were voice-overs. Just having words on the screen reduces the possible humour a lot.

And does it bother anyone that the spoof story made more sense than the real one? :p

[Painless]

It bothers me a lot... The movie normally doesn't make to much sense until it's finished and some parts still make no sense... With the wrong one you don't get confused or anything...
About the subs that One_WinGed_d3mon gave us... I can't get it to work...

[Social Moon Firesky]

Gah! My computer won't recognise the .srt bit...What do you run it with? I've extracted all the files, but it just says it doesn't recognise the program...:(

[Miriel]

Bleys linked me to this when it first came out. I think it's good silly fun. The first half at least. Toward the end you could tell that he was running out of material.

I loved how all Vincent talked about was Dirge of Cerberus.

[Painless]

Social Moon Firesky, My computer does not recognise it either.. You just need to put it into a folder with the movie, and use a program like BSplayer or any that support the subs.

My favourite part is with Sephiroth.

Sephiroth: Hey there, dollface.
Sephiroth: Your skin looks fabulous.
Sephiroth: You must exfoliate.
Cloud: Um, a little, but that doesn't mean--
Sephiroth: It's clear that you've learned the importance of grooming.
Sephiroth: I can tell just by looking at you that you...
Sephiroth: You cleanse, you exfoliate, you moisturize.
Sephiroth: You've made me proud, Cloud.
Sephiroth: I have long dreamed of knowing someone as lovely as me.
Sephiroth: And you, you are that man.

[Social Moon Firesky]

Yay! It works! Only problem is...They subs are too fast to read! Anyone know how to slow them down?

[Tifa's Real Lover(really]

pause it?

[Dinnova]

That was prob the funniest thing i have seen in a very very long time.
I love how the 3 main bad guys are mormons

[Aurora_Blade_06]

Can anyone help me download this masterpiece? Im begging!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Painless]

We are not aloud to post where to download it, Read in one of the important things.

[Social Moon Firesky]

pause it?

Lol, I would, except that would mean pausing it at every frame, which is tedious and annoying. Damn my computer...

[Holy_Aeris]

LOL
ahhhh this is funi. Its made my day!

Favourite quote-

Cloud: If you bought nine beads, the tenth was free. I bought twenty, im going to make a bracelet

[Dinnova]

Kadaj: My dice?
Kadaj:My dice!!
Kadaj:MY DICE!!
Kadaj:I'm Jesus now, Cloud.
Kadaj:I don't even really have dental insurance.
Cloud:What are you talking about?
Kadaj:I'm even a smoker.
Cloud:...Well, okay, that's nice for you.
Kadaj:I actually think Pulp Fiction is great.
Kadaj:I'm just...
Kadaj:a huge poser!


yuffie:Cloud, I brought you your balls!
yuffie:Watch it, OLD MAN.
Barret:Fine pilot! Prithee, quick to terra firma!
Cid:Maybe you can quick to my dick, okay?
Vincent: DIRGE OF CERBERUS
yuffie:Wha?!
Vincent:Nothing. Does that pretty lady remind you of anyone?
Vincent:I mean, the one with the silver hair, not the blond.
yuffie:Oh! I know! I totally... um.
Caith Sith:oh dogg the girl has no clue
and my fav

Caith sith: Oh $H!T guys help!
LMAO!

[Fire_Emblem776]

you know ill post the entire script soon so all you can read it

[MysticD]

Oh please do,friend.


HURRY UP!!!!!


Lol.Just kidding.

[Painless]

I'll do it... You want who says the things or the whole thing in a jumble....?

[MysticD]

I want to know who says the stuff....Thanks,man.

[Social Moon Firesky]

xDDDDD

Best. Fansubs. EVER!

And thankles to ????? for telling me how to make my own. ^_^

Cid: For I am Cid Highwind, Lord of the Skies! - I absolutely peed myself laughing at this.

[?????]

You're...welcomies? :p

Jesus, you really do act like Selphie. [face_anime_emote]

The first time I watched this was at my friend's apartment on a school night. We almost orgasmed laughing so hard; several of the more memorable lines are now running jokes.

C.H., Lord of the Skies is now one of my player names in Jedi Academy; that and Pork Chop Sephiroth. You won't understand that one unless you frequent eBaum's and watch the G.I. Joe parody dubs.

So, do we want to make our own remix of this, before it gets old?

[Social Moon Firesky]

You're...welcomies? :p

Jesus, you really do act like Selphie. [face_anime_emote]

So, do we want to make our own remix of this, before it gets old?

xD W00ty! Teh Selphie-ness!

Kudos to whoever suggested making fansubs with loads of EoFF jokes in! Someone should really do that and post it all over the web! Spread the EoFF lurve! :D

[crashNUMBERS]

The only one I saw of Final Fantasy VII: AC was a one where Reno keeps on saying "yo" at the end of his sentences...

[Painless]

Sorry haven't been on for a while... I'm gonna have it so It has their name then if they have more than one sentance I'll just press enter and put it in...

Spoilers:(I think...)







If you can read this, you got a degree in Japanese so you could play import video games.
Good going there, sport.
Lie Subtitles by Whitney (beeblebabe.livejournal.com)

Elena: Tseng!
Didn't you die?

Tseng: ...Maybe.

Elena: What's that suppose to mean?

Reno: You know, there was this thread on GameFAQs that said--

...(Dunno who says it): Now's not the time, Reno.

Reno: Fine, fine.

Tseng: Oh, crap! Crap!

Elena: There are fanboys, run!!
F-fanboys...

Tseng: Again?!

Elena: Ugh...

Tseng: Elena!

Elena: G-go!

Final Fantasy 7... You didn't really understand it 1996. And you're too distracted by fancy graphics to remember the plot now. Wasn't there some company called Shinra? And maybe they were using the Lifestream to make taffy? Factories full of delicious strands of fresh-pulled saltwater taffy... No, it couldn't have been about taffy, that's ridiculous. Millions of people wouldn't have bought a game about taffy. It must have been something meaningful, deep, and incredibly profound.Definitely, definitely, not about taffy. Maybe there was a meteor that was going to destroy the world? And maybe a robot chick named Jenova? Oh, wait, this was the game with Sephiroth, the prettiest girl in Nibelheim.He had a lot of mommy issues and was sad, but because LiveJournal didn't exist yet, he had to kill a lot of things instead of writing poetry. It's all coming back now, isn't it? The long hours you spent leveling up, the phallic imagery... The time you wasted getting Vincent and Yuffie... How you told your friends that you cried when Aeris died. How they laughed, oh how they laughed. And then one day...A fated day...After seventy hours of leveling up, of trying to beat Emerald and Ruby Weapon, of racing and breeding Chocobos you finally beat the game. And, god damn it, the ending made no sense.Now it must finally be time to clear things up, right?They wouldn't screw you after all this time, right? Let's go. OK. Unfortunately for you, they spent the budget on graphics and got the script from Fanfiction.Net. Buckle in, tiger.

Denzel: Hey, Marlene?
Is this going to make any sense?

Marlene: Oh, no.
Oh, good god, no.

Tifa: He's not here anymore~

Denzel: Cloud...
Please, please get that...?

Tifa: Hello, Strife Taxidermy!
You snuff 'em, we stuff--
...who is this?
Well, what are *you* wearing?

Tifa: You went out for milk six weeks ago.
This kid here's dying of osteoporosis.
Cloud... don't forget lightbulbs, too.

Message deleted.

Yazoo: Kadaj, do you know what they call a Quarter Pounder with Cheese in France?

Kudaj: No.

Yazoo: They call it a Royale with Cheese.

Kudaj: Really?

Loz: That's Bull/xxx.gif/xxx.gif/xxx.gif/xxx.gif.

Yazoo: No, it's because of the metric system.

Kadaj: I love the metric system.

Yazoo: Don't cry, that's weird.

Kadaj: Don't forget the mission.

Loz: A moment of your time, sir!

Yazoo: Have you heard of the Church of Latter Day Saints?

Kadaj: And you know what he said then?
He started quoting Pulp Fiction!
That movie is so overrated.
Well, yeah, Uma Thurman is hot.
In that weird praying mantis way.

Barret: By my troth, good fellow, it is I, Sir Barret of Wallace!
I hope this morrow finds you most well!
All is fine in my fiefdom, so I pray that you will forthwith come to visit!
May your humours stay in balance! Farewell!

Tifa: Also, we're out of eggs.
And I need some, um, you know...
The kind with wings. Thanks.

Reno: Wait, my girlfriend's in there!
Rude, tell him!

Rufus: You can win what's behind door #1 if you can just...
Guess what's under this sheet!

Cloud: ...Rufus.
Dude, I know it's you.

Rufus: Okay, lucky guess, now...

Cloud: You totally died!

Rufus: No, you see, I'm fine--

Cloud: There were explosions!

Rufus: I ducked.

Cloud: That's RETARDED.

Rufus: ...well played, Strife.

Cloud: This is the stupidest--

Rufus: Don't leave yet, there's something important you have to hear.
The future of everything we know rests on your response.
We are young. Heartache to heartache, we stand.
No promises... No demands...


Reno: Do some Toto next!

Rufus: We are strong.
No one can tell us we're wrong. Searching our hearts for so long.

Reno: Come on, do "Africa"!

Rufus: Both of us knowing...
Love. Love is a battlefield.
You're begging me to go, but
you're making me stay...
Why do you hurt me so bad?
It would help me to know
Do I stand in your way, or--

Cloud: Stop.

Rufus: Or am I the best thing you've had?
Believe me, believe me, I can't tell you why.

Cloud: Please, please stop.

Reno: Ask him to do some Debbie Gibson!

Rufus: But I'm trapped by your love.
And I'm chained to your side.
There is my riddle, Mr. Strife. Can you solve it in time?

Cloud: ...I'm really uncomfortable.

Rufus: You're the only one, don't you see?
Cloud, teach the world to rock again.

Cloud: Oh, come on...
...do you really think it's even still possible?

Rufus: Oh, you admit that you feel it?
Hmm, I guess even you can't deny the soul of rock.
I knew you were the one, just as I've known for years...
You may turn your back on us, you may try to run...
Know this: we're starting a rock band.
And you're the only one who can play lead guitar, Cloud.

Cloud: I...

Reno: It's going to be awesome! I get to play bass!

Cloud: Not interested.

Rufus & Rude: Reno!

K that's all for tonight..

Maybe I'll add some more tomorrow...
Remember if there's anything you want me to change so it seems easier or something.. Just say so..

[MysticD]

OMG HILARIOUS.

Thanks guys!
I LMAO for a sort of 10 hours.(Ok,maybe it wasn't that long,but...)


*Faints from exhaustion of laughing*

[Painless]

Hmmm, you know you posted the one that doesn't work... It got a different script to the one that does work.. You also forgot proper grammar, The only person not to speak with grammar is Cat Sith... You also have the wrong people saying the wrong things...

Meh he deleted it..

[Dinnova]

Hmmm, you know you posted the one that doesn't work... It got a different script to the one that does work.. You also forgot proper grammar, The only person not to speak with grammar is Cat Sith... You also have the wrong people saying the wrong things...
and Nanaki's only line isnt in there.

[Fire_Emblem776]

okay i will do it since it seems you people are arguing over it *sigh *

i hope the staff does not get mad with me their are several moments things that um are inapropriate..

and i dont remember who says what so you can do that on your own i hope.

to see them please follow instructions

1. copy of movie in hard drive in a folder
2. the subs unzip, and place in same folder as in movie
3. what ever the movie is named, name the same thing to the subs
4. instal vob sub, so you can play it in windows media player (PM for it its 500 kbs)

enjoy all!!

:choc2: :choc2: :choc2: :choc2: :choc2: :choc2: :choc2: :choc2:



If you can read this, you got a degree in Japanese
so you could play import video games.


Good going there, sport.





Tseng!


Didn't you die?


...Maybe.


What's that supposed to mean?


You know, there was this thread on GameFAQs that said--


Now's not the time, Reno.


Fine, fine.


Oh, crap! Crap!


There are fanboys, run!!


F-fanboys...


Again!?


Ugh...


Elena!


G-go!

Final Fantasy 7...


You didn't really understand it 1996.


And you're too distracted by fancy graphics
to remember the plot now.


Wasn't there some company called Shinra?


And maybe they were using the Lifestream to make taffy?


Factories full of delicious strands


of fresh-pulled saltwater taffy...


No, it couldn't have been about taffy, that's ridiculous.

Millions of people wouldn't have bought
a game about taffy.


It must have been something meaningful,


deep, and incredibly profound.


Definitely, definitely, not about taffy.


Maybe there was a meteor that


was going to destroy the world? And maybe a


robot chick named Jenova?


Oh, wait, this was the game with Sephiroth,


the prettiest girl in Nibelheim.


He had a lot of mommy issues and was sad,


but because LiveJournal didn't exist yet,


he had to kill a lot of things instead of
writing poetry.


It's all coming back now, isn't it?


The long hours you spent leveling up,
the phallic imagery...


The time you wasted getting Vincent and Yuffie...


How you told your friends


that you cried when Aeris died.


How they laughed, oh how they laughed.


And then one day...


A fated day...


After seventy hours of leveling up,


of trying to beat Emerald and Ruby Weapon,


of racing and breeding Chocobos


you finally beat the game.


And, god damn it, the ending made no sense.


Now it must finally be time to clear things up, right?


They wouldn't screw you after all this time, right?


Let's go.


OK.


Unfortunately for you,

they spent the budget on graphics and got the
script from Fanfiction.Net.


Marlene- Buckle in, tiger.


denzel-Hey, Marlene?


denzel-Is this going to make any sense?


marle-Oh, no.


marle-Oh, good god, no.


tifa-He's not here anymore~


Cloud...


tifa-Please, please get that...?

tifa-Hello, Strife Taxidermy!


tifa-You snuff 'em, we stuff--


tifa-...who is this?


tifa-Well, what are *you* wearing?

tifa-You went out for milk six weeks ago.


tifa-This kid here's dying of osteoporosis.


tifa-Cloud... don't forget lightbulbs, too.


Message deleted.


Kadaj, do you know what they call a
Quarter Pounder with Cheese in France?


No.


They call it a Royale with Cheese.


Really?


That's bull/xxx.gif/xxx.gif/xxx.gif/xxx.gif.


No, it's because of the metric system.


I love the metric system.


Don't cry, that's weird.


Don't forget the mission.


A moment of your time, sir!


Have you heard of the Church of Latter Day Saints?


And you know what he said then?


He started quoting Pulp Fiction!


That movie is so overrated.


Well, yeah, Uma Thurman is hot.


In that weird praying mantis way.


By my troth, good fellow, it is I,
Sir Barret of Wallace!

I hope this morrow finds you most well!


All is fine in my fiefdom, so I pray
that you will forthwith come to visit!


May your humours stay in balance! Farewell!


Also, we're out of eggs.


And I need some, um, you know...


The kind with wings. Thanks.





Wait, my girlfriend's in there!


Rude, tell him!


You can win what's behind door #1 if you can just...


Guess what's under this sheet!


...Rufus.


Dude, I know it's you.


Okay, lucky guess, now...

You totally died!


No, you see, I'm fine--


There were explosions!


I ducked.


That's RETARDED.


...well played, Strife.


This is the stupidest--

Don't leave yet, there's something important you have to hear.


The future of everything we know rests on your response.


We are young.
Heartache to heartache, we stand.


No promises... No demands...


Do some Toto next!


We are strong.


No one can tell us we're wrong. Searching our
hearts for so long.


Come on, do "Africa"!


Both of us knowing...


Love. Love is a battlefield.


You're begging me to go, but


you're making me stay...


Why do you hurt me so bad?


It would help me to know


Do I stand in your way, or--

Stop.


Or am I the best thing you've had?


Believe me, believe me, I can't tell you why.


Please, please stop.


Ask him to do some Debbie Gibson!


But I'm trapped by your love.


And I'm chained to your side.


There is my riddle, Mr. Strife.
Can you solve it in time?


...I'm really uncomfortable.


You're the only one, don't you see?

Cloud, teach the world to rock again.


Oh, come on...


...do you really think it's even still possible?


Oh, you admit that you feel it?


Hmm, I guess even you can't deny the soul of rock.


I knew you were the one, just as I've known for years...


You may turn your back on us, you may try to run...


Know this: we're starting a rock band.


And you're the only one who can play lead guitar, Cloud.


I...


It's going to be awesome! I get to play bass!


Not interested.


Reno!


Cloud's living here?


Yeah, he's a bit of a hobo.

What?


It's a slap bracelet! But it's... broken?


Oh my god, I remember those.


Why would you take the metal out?

In fourth grade I had one that said "Cowabunga."

You did?


No...

It said... "Cowabunga, *Dudes*"...


Tifa?


Let's go home, Marlene.


No! Not until you explain yourself!


...I guess you deserve as much.


Marlene, do you know what "nostalgia" is?


Yeah!


That's when people think something
from the past is cooler than it really was.


Like ironic t-shirts!


Or vintage video games, right?


Exactly!


This is really juvenile, you know.

Please! Just one round, it's all I ask.


It's really the only way I...


I know how to communicate with people.


Please, just one round...


Promise?


I promise.


Fine, I tap these for two black mana.


That's not how the game works.


Oh, god, excuse me for not being a nerd.


I was busy *not* making out with my d20s in 8th grade.


My d20s...


You see, me, and my brother Daryl,
and my other brother Daryl


We sat at the lunch table with the cool kids


and never once jerked off to the Monsterous Manual.

You're such a nerd that I've lost my train of thought...


I never...


Please, an adult is talking.


Do you know what your problem is, chump?


You have no sense of perspective...


You spend all your time wrapped up in your fantasy world...


And you never even...


Do you even have a real job?

The comic book shop doesn't count.


The record store, either.


I mean a real job, with a desk, and real responsibility.


With dental insurance!


Until you have these things

you don't really know what it's like to be a grown-up.


...I, I have dental insurance.


You're going to make me do this the hard way, aren't you?

This giant phallic object...


...means its time for obligatory gay jokes.


Ever thing about being in a movie?
You know, a "movie"?


Biggest one you've ever seen, huh?


Do you ever think you're going with girls
because you're supposed to?


We're "friends", right?


Cloud, run!


Excuse me, ladies.


I'd just like a few moments of your time.


The Book of Mormon is--


My allergies!


Do you have a Claritin?


I thought you people couldn't take medicine.


That's *Christian Scientists*, stupid.


It's time to *witness*!

Tifa!


God, I've told you!


Metahumor is *lame*!


Got it.


Thank you, Elder.


Time to finish this.


Cloud...

Run!


So, how much?


Can't be more than 5 gil, let's go.


Tifa?


Tifa!


S-Shadow Moses...


Who did this?


Mm... Meryl...


Liquid?!


Wrong game!


Don't worry.


You're still a virgin. We checked.


Twice.


Don't be sad.


I...

Whatever, go post on your LiveJournal.


You two are really obsessed.


I mean, Marsellus Wallace's briefcase?


This probably won't make me feel a goddamned
thing like Samuel L. Jackson.


Current mood: sad.


It's like that Bon Jovi song... isn't it?

You're a cowboy, on a steel horse you ride.


You're wanted.


Dead or alive.


But it's your life, Cloud! It's now or never!


You're not going to live forever!


You've just got to live while you're alive!


But... I guess it's *your* life.


I can't...


I can't listen to you anymore.


I'm just going to pretend that you're
making bee noises.


Starting now.








God, you two make Amish teens look like hardcore porn.


Christ, when did you get here?


We have always been here. We will always be here.


What does that mean?


Someone forgot his keys.


(It was Reno.)


Okay, kids, are we all excited to be here today?

Your principal asked me to all talk to you about


the dangers of SMOKING.


Statistics show that child tobacco use is up.


That's right.


If the studies are correct...


One out of every three of you...


has smoked or will start smoking within the next year.


But...


I'm here to show you the consequences!


It's trying to stunt our growth!

That's why our bodies hurt
and our hearts seem to give up.


I'll cure you.


This water represents a sacred oath


that you will not smoke tobacco until your graduation day.


Follow my lead, kids.


Denzel!


Denzel!!


Hey, there, loser!


I heard that your momma's so fat...


...when she broke her leg, gravy came out!


Dis!


Anyway, does this look like the end
of Final Fantasy 8 to you?


Yeah, a little.


Okay, a lot.


Man, *that* game was awesome.


Hello, Mr. Moonpants!


Excuse me, madam, I--


Does Marsellus Wallace look like a bitch?


Does Marsellus Wallacue LOOK like a BITCH?


Well, does he!?


Cloud!


...and then they made me their chief.


Anyway, uh, long time no see.


Same to you, tiger.


I've been keeping myself busy with, you know...


DIRGE OF CERBERUS


Have you heard of it? I'm sure you haven't.


In 2006, you will reach new levels of intensity.


DIRGE OF CERBERUS will rock you to your core.


Dirge of... what?


Allow me to expand your vocabulary.


DIRGE:


A funeral hymn or lament.


CERBERUS:


A three-headed hound guarding the entrance to Hades.


What do you get when you combine the two?


You get a DIRGE OF CERBERUS.


And that is...


What is it?


You'll find out for yourself.


...also, in my spare time I've taken up crocheting.


It's really nice that you can have a hobby.


I've made some rather fabulous shawls.


Do you want me to teach you?


I'm also learning how to knit.


Thanks, but...


....No thanks.


You don't know what you're missing out on.


Marlene!


Cloud! I want a shawl!


I don't have one.


God, you're useless!


Is that a satin lining?


That's some nice work.


Vincent, why don't you two discuss this in private?


Handicrafts make me uncomfortable.


Knitting's not that hard...

Really, I...


You're just scared because you think it's trendy!


Is doing something that other
people like *that* bad?


Marlene...


Tifa talked to you about nostalgia, right?


The knitting trend is a lot like that.

Only I think it's a lot gayer.


And I have issues, remember?


How could I forget!


Cloud. Remember. DIRGE OF CERBERUS.


What does that even mean?


Someone forgot his keys.


(It was Reno.)


Okay, you do that.


I need to be around normal people.

Stop!


I know what this is about!


All you've ever wanted is for me to
be more like *her*!


You know I can't be, but that's what it is.


Admit it, it's true, isn't it?


Well, fine, then, I'll be like her!


I heard that your momma is so, so fat


that she broke her leg and hot bloody fat
sprayed everywhere!


Some of it even got on the mayor!

354

That's just what I heard, I don't know if it's true.


That was disturbingly erotic.


Don't you see how bad I am at the dozens?


Please, god... let me hear everyone as bees.



Hey...


I always liked knitting.


Does it require special equipment?

Try your local arts and crafts store.


Arts...


and crafts...?

420
Marlene, we're going shopping


I'll try it.

It better not make me gay.


Remember me? I'm Reeve!


You should be aware that I am also


appearing in DIRGE OF CERBERUS.


The hottest new release of 2006!


Reserve your copy today!


Long time no see! It's Yuffie!

Did you hear that hentai doujinshi is no longer paying scale?

I am so going on strike! See you soon!





I promise never to talk about your mother again.


Just please, please remember to pick up lightbulbs.


Hey! Joseph Smith was a fraud!


The Plates of Meroni were a sham!



Denzel!


Denzel!


Denzel!


Hey, you need a permit for that.


Oh, we filled out all the right forms.


Form 11-C?

Was that the pink one? We definitely did the pink ones.


Nope, sorry, it's the red one!


You'll have to do it again.


We'll escort you back to the planning office.

You know what? I think we're just going to skip the permit.


BUREAUCRACY!!


Okay, keep listening.


We've rolled your character, we're almost done..


I'm a Tremere.



When you take a character Merit, you also have to
take an equal number of points in Flaws.

It makes for a balanced character, understand?

Like, the Unnatural Beauty Merit
And the Totally Crazy Flaw?


Just like Sephiroth.


...basically.


You know what?.


What?


I want to be the Storyteller!


It's not fair that you get to hide


underneath that drape and look at


everyone's character sheets!


I'm not really--...


I even have a great idea for a campaign.


It'll be about a party of rag-tag and mismatched heroes


who band together to save the world from certain doom.


No one will have ever seen anything like it before.



I will entirely show you nerds up at your own stupid game.


Every loser will play my game,


And I will win at every round.


I keep telling, you, you don't 'win'--


I am the game master, *and* I have dental insurance!


...Okay, good, then have a few pieces of taffy and calm down.


It's good saltwater taffy, isn't it? It's home made.


Reno and Rude are not only fine bodyguards and goons,


they're also a first class pair of taffy-pullers.


I used to own the factory that made the taffy.


It was my pride and joy, but it's gone now.


But mark my words, I will have it back.


I will have it back, and more.


Do you suddenly hear choppers? I hear a chopper.


/xxx.gif/xxx.gif/xxx.gif/xxx.gif, it's making me flash back to 'Nam.


What? You were never in 'Nam. You're not even--


I will not sit by and watch another marine die
to live by those smurfing rules!!


Denzel, run, stupid!





Want cotton candy?


Race ya.


Do they have the blue kind?!


I hope so!


We found our permits.


Let me notorize it!


It needs to be signed in triplicate!


I'll do that, but first, have you ever considered
attending Brigham Young University?


You guys...


Does it bother you that your religion is a sham?


What kind of God would deny you coffee and tea?


It's not that bad. We have have soda.


It's really about living a good life and helping.
No one believes in the angels from space.


Want some literature?


You know, all that's well and good, but y'all still wear
magic underwear.


Hey!


We're not supposed to talk about that!



It's deeply sacred!



...sorry.


That's right... Wait, why are we apologizing?!


Tifa?


You bastard!


Tend to the lady, young squire!


Barret!

Is my maiden child still well?


oh /xxx.gif/xxx.gif/xxx.gif/xxx.gifs guys help


Ugh.


Suckin' dick bought this shuriken!


That's my girl.


So bring it on!


She single?


Whiskey and handjobs for all my men!


For I'm Cid Highwind, Lord of the Skies!

DIRGE OF CERBERUS


Is *she* single?


So out of your league.


Marlene is safe. She's at the bead store.

Thank god.

If you bought nine beads, the tenth was free.

Huh?


I bought twenty. I'm going to make a bracelet.


Wow, I want to go to that store!


Maybe I can learn how to make a lanyard!


You're my inspiriation, miss!


You tarried long enough, sirrah!


I roll 20s! I have a natural 25 in kicking ass, bitches!


What the--


*I* rock out with my cock out, nerd.


Tally ho!





DIRGE


Yo momma!





My dice!


The band!


Hey, Rude.


Do you know what rules?


No, Reno, I can't say I know what rules.



Go on, guess what rules.


I wouldn't want to deny you your one joy in life.



You mean that?



Your happiness is important to me.


In that case...
San Dimas Highschool Football *Rules*!


My dice?


My dice!!


MY DICE!!


I'm Jesus now, Cloud.


I don't even really have dental insurance.



What are you talking about?


I'm even a smoker.


...Well, okay, that's nice for you.



I actually think Pulp Fiction is great.


I'm just...


a huge poser!


Cloud, I brought you your balls!


Watch it, OLD MAN.


Fine pilot! Prithee, quick to terra firma!


Maybe you can quick to my dick, okay?


DIRGE OF CERBERUS


Wha?!


Nothing. Does that pretty lady remind you of anyone?


I mean, the one with the silver hair, not the blond.


Oh! I know! I totally... um.


oh dogg the girl has no clue


The astute observer might note he resembles Sephiroth.


Do you think Cloud has noticed?



Oh, hell no.


Boy ain't bright....



Let's... leave them alone.


I don't get it! Explain!


Maybe when you're older.


Discrimination! Discrimnaaation~


oh damn people don't fight!


Your fine elders also lack comprehension!


Cloud kind of has issues...


I mean, I'm sure you've all noticed at least some of them...


You know, with all of the flowing hair, and the phallic
weapons, he's a little sensitive about...


Well, let's just say he might be into knitting.


Aye, 'tis a craft of the fop and strumpet.


As long as he's not beading. That's way gay.


Yeah, kinda.


Okay, bitch, it's on now.


Hey there, dollface.


Your skin looks fabulous.


You must exfoliate.


Um, a little, but that doesn't mean--


It's clear that you've learned the importance of grooming.


I can tell just by looking at you that you...


You cleanse, you exfoliate, you moisturize.


You've made me proud, Cloud.


I have long dreamed of knowing someone as lovely as me.

And you, you are that man.


Maybe we could have some coffee later.


You could meet my knitting circle.

I don't knit. I crochet.


It's all the same, deep down, don't you know?


Jesus?!


Oho... Is that new conditioner, too?


I don't feel good about this line of questioning.


Should I get some scones ready for our coffee?


Or are you more a muffin guy?

I guess I can get both, and we can just nibble.


Which do you prefer?


Acrylic blends or 100% cotton yarn?


Only a fool would use acrylic.


And it's an insult to the craft!


We'll have that coffee later.


I...


I'll bake lemon squares.

Oh, snap.


Kadaj?

Huh?


Your mother is so fat...


How... how fat is she?


She's so fat she fell in love, and broke it.


It's true.


Awesome! That was totally predicatable!


A happy morrow we will have!


man the dude has no mercy


Cloud can do anything if he puts his mind to it!


Shut up and hold on, bitches!


Why is there a spoon up there?


That's weird, Cid.


We'll have fun in heaven without you.


Should have taken the literature...


Cloud!


Tell me, are *you* single?


Mother...?


Again!


I can't be yo momma, because I don't suck dick for crack.


His mother really does have a problem with that.


I keep telling him, but he won't believe it.


Maybe it's best he stay in denial for now.


Jesus told us...


She said your mom was a ho.


It's so true!


Yeah... it is.


There's a young man here with some beading questions.


It's okay.


Ask him whatever you need.


No one will judge you now.


Try your best.


EVERYONE INTO THE POOL!


It's cured, it's cured!


You're all right now, aren't you?


Yeah.


I'm...


I'm a knitter.



:choc2: :choc2: :choc2: :choc2: :choc2: :choc2: :choc2: :choc2:

[Night Strife]

You didn't say who says what.

[Fire_Emblem776]

You didn't say who says what.

im well aware of that, i will edit it sometime.

[Painless]

Gah you stole my pleasure.... I had the right one too....

[Fire_Emblem776]

you are free to add the charachters names in here you know :)

the members of eoff deserve that :)

[Painless]

What do you mean I can add the names? Makes no sense *head explodes*

[Dinnova]

Makes no sense *head explodes*
PAINLESS!!!!??? WHY!!!!!???? *Head also explodes*

[Omni-Odin]

I don't find it that funny, but maybe I will when I see the movie.

[Painless]

*Walks in without a head*
It's heaps better when you watch the movie... It's also quite fun to have no head...

[MysticD]

Painless,he meant the link that he provided....
Save the link and open it on WinZip and you can edit the script.

[Painless]

Ehh... Right... No idea what you're talking about..

Edit: I see what you mean...
EditEdit: Still makes no sense what your talking about...

[Fire_Emblem776]

the script is all thier, just edit the script so the charachters names appear with their dioluge. But it is much better with the movie because it is done perfectly.

[MysticD]

Ehh... Right... No idea what you're talking about..

Edit: I see what you mean...
EditEdit: Still makes no sense what your talking about...

Nevermind.....

[Painless]

Right right.... Understand... I had a headache back then and couldn't think straight..

[GrieverX]

Awww man, it looks really funny but the AC video i have has subtitles so its really hard to read it :-( Is there ne way to disable the regular subtiles,dont think so but looking around to find a video without subtitles.

[Angel_Rinoa]

hm never watched it. maybe i'll try today(:

[Painless]

Awww man, it looks really funny but the AC video i have has subtitles so its really hard to read it :-( Is there ne way to disable the regular subtiles,dont think so but looking around to find a video without subtitles.
Remove your regular subs out of the folder and put the R version ones in...

[GrieverX]

Good Idea, the thing is now the subtitles r going to fast...wierd