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Elite Lord Sigma
10-13-2005, 04:25 AM
What would a stupid criminal do during a crime? Also, what shouldn't you say to a cop?

DMKA
10-13-2005, 04:29 AM
Break the law for crap that isn't even worth breaking the law for.

Elite Lord Sigma
10-13-2005, 04:41 AM
Hall of Fame

Where the best ones go.

1. Setting your gun on a counter and having someone else take it (ShlupQuack)
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Swordicanus
10-13-2005, 05:06 PM
A classic stupid thing would be for a criminal to plan a steal on a high class jewelery store......He holds everyone up grabs the jewels and dashes for the door he pulls it.....OH CRAP I'M LOCKED IN!!! after 10 mins of tugging the door he gives up and slides to the ground in disbelief..................upon being arrested the criminal says "DAMN IT I OVERLOOKED THE AIR TIGHT SECURITY DOORS THAT LOCK UP" "

"air tight security doors" laughs the cop "maybe if you tried PUSHING the door" and so the criminal is defeated by his own stupidity...... now thats stupid lol :p

Luara
10-13-2005, 05:12 PM
"may God help me do this right" XD

Primus Inter Pares
10-13-2005, 05:15 PM
Never tell a cop that his butt looks big in that.

Old Manus
10-13-2005, 05:18 PM
Rob Tesco thinking there would be anything worth stealing

Rainecloud
10-13-2005, 05:47 PM
Attempt to rob a bank.

The chances of them succeeding are miniscule at best.

Sasquatch
10-13-2005, 06:38 PM
Check out www.darwinawards.com, they have some hilarious stuff. One story I remember is about some schmuck kid, like 15 or 16 I think, that decided that he could strip naked, lather himself up in Crisco, and crawl through the ventilation shaft of a convenience store. Unfortunately for him, his hips got stuck on the way down the ceiling vent, and the owner found him when he opened the store the next morning, naked, covered in grease, half stuck in the ceiling vent.

Laugh at face of Danger
10-13-2005, 06:58 PM
commit the crime

duh!

leave his wallet containing a birth certificate, credit cards, a signed photgraph of himself and adress...HE WILL LEAVE POLICE BAFFLED!

SammieBabe
10-13-2005, 07:09 PM
I watched a reality tv star get arrested at the hotel I work in, and they dragged him out in cuffs screaming " Don't you know who I am??"

It was hilarious......

Levian
10-13-2005, 08:18 PM
"Is that a gun in your pants, or are you just going to arrest and prosecute me for armed robbery, multiple homicide and possession of drugs? :joey:"

CaZ!
10-13-2005, 08:53 PM
i tell you one thing a pope should never say in his first speech as pope
"i would like to thank my wife and four wonderful children"
HeeHeeHee :D

Rainecloud
10-13-2005, 09:43 PM
i tell you one thing a pope should never say in his first speech as pope
"i would like to thank my wife and four wonderful children"
HeeHeeHee :D

Judging by the way Churches are changing at the moment, that's probably not going to be considered a sin in the near future. ;)

Venom
10-13-2005, 10:06 PM
Murder somebody then bury there body next to a police station

Shlup
10-13-2005, 10:20 PM
I saw a video (on Maximum Exposure I think) where a criminal set his gun on the counter, and when the cashier picked it up the guy got all sad and asked for it back, "pretty please" and all. xD

Sweet Beloved
10-13-2005, 10:24 PM
Haha. On CNN, they showed what court was like here where I live and this girl was sueing her husband for his money, and he jumped up and started strangling her and attacking her! They had three or four cops trying to stop him. That...is embarassing...

Giga Guess
10-13-2005, 11:02 PM
One of my new neighbor's place got broken into last fall. These guys pretty much cleaned him out, including his keys for his car. So they reach home base, and what do they decide? Use HIS car to go BACK, and finish cleaning out the place (Now bear in mind, this guy is a bodybuilder, and looks a wee bit intimidating.) So they get here again, and meet the landlady at the door. They give her some lame excuse about being here to see "Bob" or something, in which she turns them away. Then King (the victim) gets here, asks why his car is in the parking lot (They were smart enough to not climb in, and rather, tried walking around the block) at which point the landlord pointed in the direction they were heading in. Long story short, they approached these guys, acting inconspicuous, and pinned 'em, 'til the authorities got there.

They plead guilty, for the record.

Venom
10-13-2005, 11:08 PM
Maybe the criminals are so stupid they're smart.

xtreme112
10-14-2005, 05:18 AM
commit the crime

duh!

Need we say more?

Christmas
04-23-2022, 02:02 AM
Posting shit on Social Media of course. Heard a drug lord was caught recently due to this. :bigsmile:

If you do sneaky and shady stuff, don't announce it like some attention whore. Be like me, stealth and shadowy. :pinkelephant:

I am a very low profile person especially on the internet. I am everywhere.