Rye
04-08-2006, 05:29 PM
This... is my story.
So, my iPod broke (it's an old click wheel one and I think it broke because it was old and it was damaged when I was updating the iPod and my computer crashed) and I couldn't fix it, so I decided to go to the Apple store about an hour away to see if they'd give me a new one, since I was still under the year warrenty.
So I go in, and the first thing I noticed was the smell. I was thinking to myself "Hey, this smells kinda nice... What is it... Macintosh..." (PA fans will get it, but here. (http://www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2006/03/03)) and I was frightened then and there. Then this snooty looking guy comes up to us and asks "Do you have an appointment?" What the hell? Who needs an appointment at a computer store? Oh, but it's an APPLE store. So he led us to an Apple laptop and made us make a reservation in it for 10 minutes later, which just speaks volumes of weirdness and pretentiousness. Then he walked us to the place where they'd help us. It was called the "Genius Bar" and it said so on top of a picture of an atom. And the people behind the "Genius Bar" had shirts that said things like "Blah, Blah, Blog" and "Genius." We had to wait there until being called over by one of the hip mega-nerds.
Then I had an epiphany. You know how in the movies, a guy will think he's badass because he stole his grandma's bag of groceries, and then he goes into an infamous bar with a gang because he thinks he's one of them and then he's like "... Oh /xxx.gif/xxx.gif/xxx.gif/xxx.gif. I don't belong here. I'm not THAT bad." I stared down at my iPod. and stared into my soul reflected in that scratched up silver back plate and prayed to Vishnu and Shiva that I'd never go beyond an iPod. I'd never become an Apple-head. I won't buy one of their tiny laptops. I cried silently in my heart as I watched people who came in and were just as confused as we were before, trying to ask the Apple people for help. This one woman didn't have an appointment, and it was like the hip mega-nerds at the "Genius Bar" couldn't see her, like they were robots programmed against those without an appointment. They didn't even look in her direction. Poor woman.
All around me were dancing black silhouettes in jazz bands with white chords coming out from all their bodily orifices and it chilled my heart. I looked everywhere to try to find one shred of something not Macintosh, but I just couldn't. They were closing in on me. Jessica, Jessica, buy this ridiculously tiny laptop. Buuuuy meeeee! Become an Apple Head! No! I won't give in! I won't be a dancing black silhouette!
Then I snap up and a mega-hip "Genius Bar" nerd called me over, and took a look at my iPod. Long story short, my parents actually had to pay 60 dollars even though we were under the 12 month warrenty because we came after 6 months. Which is pretty ridiculous, but I was just glad to be out of there and having a working mp3 player, since they gave me a new click wheel just like mine to replace my old broken one.
And that is how I survived being at an Apple store for a half hour. Any horror stories of Apple stores or any other snobby stores? I never want to go into one again, it's frightening how pretentious they are there. Who walks into a store to make an appointment for 10 minutes later?
So, my iPod broke (it's an old click wheel one and I think it broke because it was old and it was damaged when I was updating the iPod and my computer crashed) and I couldn't fix it, so I decided to go to the Apple store about an hour away to see if they'd give me a new one, since I was still under the year warrenty.
So I go in, and the first thing I noticed was the smell. I was thinking to myself "Hey, this smells kinda nice... What is it... Macintosh..." (PA fans will get it, but here. (http://www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2006/03/03)) and I was frightened then and there. Then this snooty looking guy comes up to us and asks "Do you have an appointment?" What the hell? Who needs an appointment at a computer store? Oh, but it's an APPLE store. So he led us to an Apple laptop and made us make a reservation in it for 10 minutes later, which just speaks volumes of weirdness and pretentiousness. Then he walked us to the place where they'd help us. It was called the "Genius Bar" and it said so on top of a picture of an atom. And the people behind the "Genius Bar" had shirts that said things like "Blah, Blah, Blog" and "Genius." We had to wait there until being called over by one of the hip mega-nerds.
Then I had an epiphany. You know how in the movies, a guy will think he's badass because he stole his grandma's bag of groceries, and then he goes into an infamous bar with a gang because he thinks he's one of them and then he's like "... Oh /xxx.gif/xxx.gif/xxx.gif/xxx.gif. I don't belong here. I'm not THAT bad." I stared down at my iPod. and stared into my soul reflected in that scratched up silver back plate and prayed to Vishnu and Shiva that I'd never go beyond an iPod. I'd never become an Apple-head. I won't buy one of their tiny laptops. I cried silently in my heart as I watched people who came in and were just as confused as we were before, trying to ask the Apple people for help. This one woman didn't have an appointment, and it was like the hip mega-nerds at the "Genius Bar" couldn't see her, like they were robots programmed against those without an appointment. They didn't even look in her direction. Poor woman.
All around me were dancing black silhouettes in jazz bands with white chords coming out from all their bodily orifices and it chilled my heart. I looked everywhere to try to find one shred of something not Macintosh, but I just couldn't. They were closing in on me. Jessica, Jessica, buy this ridiculously tiny laptop. Buuuuy meeeee! Become an Apple Head! No! I won't give in! I won't be a dancing black silhouette!
Then I snap up and a mega-hip "Genius Bar" nerd called me over, and took a look at my iPod. Long story short, my parents actually had to pay 60 dollars even though we were under the 12 month warrenty because we came after 6 months. Which is pretty ridiculous, but I was just glad to be out of there and having a working mp3 player, since they gave me a new click wheel just like mine to replace my old broken one.
And that is how I survived being at an Apple store for a half hour. Any horror stories of Apple stores or any other snobby stores? I never want to go into one again, it's frightening how pretentious they are there. Who walks into a store to make an appointment for 10 minutes later?