Things FFIX characters would never say/do

[daggertrepe]

I think there was actually a thread on this once in here...but I'm not sure. If there was, then it's really old. So let's start anew! But, mods, if you don't think another is neccesary or the old one is fine, feel free to lock this and give me the link the the old one. :D I just feel this place needs some life!

Alright...

Zidane: That Garnet girl, makes sure she doesn't come near me...
Garnet: Zidane...OHHHH Zidane! Where are you Ziddy-poo?
Vivi: White mages smell
Steiner: Ahh...screw the princess, Eiko and I are goin out for pizza!
Freya: Fratley? Fratley who?
Amarant: When I grow up, I want to be a babysitter!
Eiko: La la la...being alone is soooo wonderful...la la la...boy, do I hate Zidane!
Beatrix: I wonder where the monacle shop is...?
Mikoto: *gasps* Pretty flowers!!!!
Blank: I hate you, Baku
Baku: Aww...stealing things is no fun...
Marcus: I hate you Baku
Cinna: I hate you Baku


:D

[Shiny]

Haha, you're a fast one you are. Okay let's see...

Garnet/Dagger: What's wrong?
Zidane: I think someone's rubbing my butt again. Steiner, is that you?!
Steiner: No, I swear it's not me this time!
Zidane: Then who is?
Vivi:...I couldn't resist, Zidane, it looked so soft!

[daggertrepe]

Haha...

Beatrix: Where's the princess?
Steiner: Who cares! Let's go to a 50 cent concert!
Beatrix Ok!

[Shiny]

Har har!

Steiner: Beatrix, I have to tell you something...
Beatrix: Go ahead, loser.
Steiner: I really want to become you. You're powerful and indepdent and so much better than I am.
Beatrix: Duh!
Steiner: So, I'm going to get a plastic surgery, a sex and name change so I can be you.

[daggertrepe]

Haha...here's one

Steiner: I love you Beatrix
Beatrix: The feeling is mutal!
Steiner: Let us make-out
Beatrix: Ok!

*Both make out*

Yea-aww...we LIKE this!

[Twilight Edge]

Garnet:Help me,Steiner!
Steiner:I'm coming Princess!
Zidane:Catch me if you can,rusty!
Steiner:I shall not be called RUSTY at any cost!
Zidane:*pats butt*
Garnet:Eww,you're gross.
Steiner:*charges at Zidane*
Zidane:*dodges by hanging on a pole*
Steiner:*slams into a wall*
Garnet:......
Zidane:That was retarded...

[_yeojina_]

Zidane: Is that a girl? ...RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!!!

I know, not that funny. But hey, I tried. Oh, here's another one.

Dagger: EEEWWW!!! IT'S SO BIG!!! I DON'T EVEN WANNA LOOK AT IT!!! But don't worry, Kuja had one, The Knights of Pluto and Steiner had one, even I did once!
Steiner: *Eavesdrops, then gasps*
Zidane: I'm sorry, Dagger. I shouldn't have shown you.
Dagger: It's okay. Besides, we all have one at least ONCE in our lifetimes.
Steiner: *Panicing*

*A squelching sound is heard*

Dagger: EEEWWW!!! IT WOBBLES!!!
Steiner: OH MY GOD!!!
Dagger and Zidane: Steiner! What were you thinking?!
Steiner: Oh... heh heh heh...
Dagger: Don't worry, Zidane, Steiner can just be... sick sometimes.
Zidane: So... Can you heal my pimple for me?
Dagger: Sure! Just let me get my staff and some bandages, and your tail will be clean in no time!

Fin

[Rantz]

Steiner and Zidane are chatting.
Steiner: Like, OMG, you and Dagger were SO doing it last night!
Zidane: No way! I'm not into that kind of things you know.
Steiner: Oh but you couldn't resist Dagger in that tight outfit of hers! *giggles*
Zidane: You know, if I'm into anyone it's Eiko.
Quina: Anyone who wants these chips can have them. I'm on a diet.
Vivi runs into the room, glides on his knees with his hands raised in the air and doing "The beast" sign and yells "WAZZUP MOTHER/xxx.gif/xxx.gif/xxx.gif/xxx.gif/xxx.gifEEEEERS!?".
Freya starts doing a moonwalk.

[Chris]

Zidane: "I'm so hungry, let's go get something to eat"

Steiner: "I'm hungry too!"

Garnet: "Psst! Steiner, am I the only one who enjoys a good monkey soup?"

Steiner: " *Whispers* No, you're not"

Ziane: "........."

[Twilight Edge]

Steiner:I hate gyshal pickles.

[daggertrepe]

Steiner and Zidane are chatting.
Steiner: Like, OMG, you and Dagger were SO doing it last night!
Zidane: No way! I'm not into that kind of things you know.
Steiner: Oh but you couldn't resist Dagger in that tight outfit of hers! *giggles*
Zidane: You know, if I'm into anyone it's Eiko.
Quina: Anyone who wants these chips can have them. I'm on a diet.
Vivi runs into the room, glides on his knees with his hands raised in the air and doing "The beast" sign and yells "WAZZUP MOTHER/xxx.gif/xxx.gif/xxx.gif/xxx.gif/xxx.gifEEEEERS!?".
Freya starts doing a moonwalk.

-Haha...that's great...:p

Freya: Then again, Cleyra wasn't ALL that important to me...I mean, it was just a plie of floating dust with rude people wanting to steal jewels!

Beatrix: Um...Freya...that was ME! *Takes out sword*

Freya: :eek:

[Quindiana Jones]

Quina: "Urgh....me full...."

Zidane: *looks down* "Hm. Wonder what that's for...."

Vivi: "Oh shut up, I don't give a :skull::skull::skull::skull:..."

Steiner: *sleepily* "urrrrgggghhhh.....I'll get up in a mintue...leave me alone..."

Amarant: "Hi guys!!! Wanna go to a ball game with me?? We can share popcorn! I'll even buy you a big foam hand!"

Freya (in response to Amarant): "SWEET!!!"

Garnet: *casts Fire*

Eiko: *devil voice* "I'm an the Unclean One, Lord of Darkness! You shall al obey me or you shall all DIE!!!"

Kuja: "Damn I wish I had pants...."

[Rantz]

Eiko: *devil voice* "I'm an the Unclean One, Lord of Darkness! You shall al obey me or you shall all DIE!!!"
Lol, that'd be a cool twist.

[Quindiana Jones]

Yeah. Spice her character up a bit.

[Rantz]

Amarant: Zidane, I think I'm in love with Lani, but I have no idea what to say. What do I do to catch her attention?
Zidane: Dude, I have no idea. I don't know anything about women.
Vivi: Hey Red, I'll give you some advice. I've been here and there you know. Call me tonight at 1-800-CALL4SEX.
Freya: *Does a moonwalk*

[daggertrepe]

Garnet: Hey Rusty, over here!
Steiner: *walks over* Yes princess?
Garnet: Can you get me a soda?
Steiner: Umm...soda? What's...a soda?
Garnet: Oh, you know, that fizzy black stuff that crackles in your mouth...you know...
Steiner: No, I have no idea what you are talking about, but I shall bring you your soda!
*Comes back 2 hours later*
Garnet: Took you long enough. *Grabs for her soda but grabs Vivi's nose instead*
AHHH! WTF?
Vivi: Oww...
Steiner: You told me to bring something black and fuzzy looking so I brought you vivi!
Garnet: I SAID fizzy-tasting! Not fuzzy looking! And besides, how is Vivi FUZZY?
Steiner: O_O

Oh, heres another one-

Kuja: Zidane...I know you came to save me, but it is too late! Leave while you still can, my love!
Zidane: Nooo! I won't leave you! *Hugs him*
Kuja: It is your only hope, as I am going with the wind...I just wanted to say that...I...I love you!
Zidane: I love you too...like a brother!
Kuja: O_O Aww poopie.
Zidane: What did you say?
Kuja: I mean *cough* it is the end for me!

:p

[Fantasy Fan]

Has anyone else ever wondered why Steiner admires Vivi so much?

edit:
Garnet: Took you long enough. *Grabs for her soda but grabs Vivi's nose instead*
AHHH! WTF? Vivi has a nose?

[daggertrepe]

Actually...I have no idea!

[Twilight Edge]

LOL!!

Ruby:I think I will start to try speaking in proper english instead of speaking in utterly ridiculous slangs.

Baku:I never laughed my whole life!

[Lenna]

Regent Cid: *Ribbit*.. Hilda, I know you can't forgive me after having that affair, but she was just so good...and juicy.
Hilda: But Brahne???? she looks like an oglop!? A BIG BLUE OGLOP!
Regent Cid: You know they're my specialty though. *Ribbit*
Hilda: And you wondered why I turned you into one *sigh*

:P

[Levian]

Quina: Eiko, you mind if I storage my donuts on your horn?

[Twilight Edge]

Quina:Qu tribe got bad english.I want go learn good english.Maybe I ask doctor.....who his name?
Baku:Tootsie.
Quina:Thank!Doctor Tootsie teach me good english!

Fratley:I only prertended to lose my memory because I'm in love with Beatrix.
Freya:Mo matter.I'm in love with Amarant.
Steiner:I don't mind either,I'm making out with Lani!

Regent Cid(oglop form):PRESENTING~~~~~~THE CID BRAND OGLOP OIL!THE BEST SUPPLY OF OGLOP OIL YOU'LL GET ON THE MARKET!FRESHLY MADE BY THE OGLOP OIL IN ME!

later in the game......

(at the qu tribe)
Cid(frog form):PRESENTING~~~~~~~~THE CID BRAND FROG MEAT!OR IN OTHER WORDS,ME!
*Qus tear him apart and gobbled him down*

[-X-Trance_Kuja-X-]

Kuja: I suddenly have the urge to wear a vest and combat trousers
Vivi: Beatrix your boobs...:: drool ::

[daggertrepe]

Beatrix: *Slaps Vivi* Foo!

[-X-Trance_Kuja-X-]

Vivi: KILL KILL KILL!!!!

[Quindiana Jones]

Quina: Sorry, I no can eat. I allergic to nuts.

[Christmas]

Zidane: I am actually a Saiyan and will turn into a giant ape during full moon.