The Weapons Man Upstairs; What Is The Meaning Behind This Heinous Lie?

[Alive-Cat]

Here is something that has been troubling me nigh on my whole entire life. (Since 1998, anyway.)
It concerns this "weapons man upstairs" that ol' Tifa mentions when you wake up in Tifa's Seventh Heaven the morning after the first mission.
Tifa says something along the lines of;
"The weapons man upstairs has something to give you! Don't forget!"
This statement would lead me to believe lil' Tifa is talking generally of the upstairs of Tifa's Seventh Heaven.
1. Tifa's Seventh Heaven has no upstairs. It has a basement where operations are planned and a ground floor which serves as a bar. Nothing beyond that.
2. In the only weapons shop in the whole of sector 7, the weapons dealer is, I believe, a woman. And she doesn't give me anything. In fact, she threatens me;
"You can't just leave here without buying something! It might be unhealthy for ya, if ya know what I mean!"
Now, the only possible thing that Tifa's statement could mean is the tutorials available on the second floor of the weapons shop; "Upstairs".
But nobody gives me anything. A guy has an All materia in front of him, I take it, then I get an Ether. At least I think it was an Ether. I'm usually so intoxicated with violent rage at this point that I'm not thinking straight, because I can't find one single blasted weapons dealer.
All of this leads me to believe Tifa is a liar. A filthy, reckless, stupid liar. :mad2:
Please, someone, anyone, point me in the right direction to discovering this mystery, this twisted web of lies, and get me on the path to enlightenment once more!

[LunarWeaver]

I've always wanted to know what the fuck she was talking about as well :cry:

[Alive-Cat]

I'm playing FFVII through again, and I simply REFUSE to play a single second more until I found out the truth!

[f f freak]

I believe tifa means by Weapons man:herself, be something to give you: something to give you, and by upstairs: My breasts.

Put this together and you have: "Don't forget I want to give you my breasts"

[cloud21zidane16]

if you talk to the guy downstairs before you go to sleep he tells you to comeback tommorow, when you go back he says go upstairs, alls it is is an all materia and a bunch of people telling you how to battle and how to save and all the basic rubbish thats easy to learn by yourself anyway

[Jimmy Dark Aeons Slayer]

The weapon man is Barret because he as a weapon stuck to his arm and he as to give Cloud his money.

Ahh...well something like that.

[cloud21zidane16]

youre joking right?

[Jimmy Dark Aeons Slayer]

youre joking right?

The question is what if i´m saying the truth?

[LunarWeaver]

I have come to the conclusion what she actually meant was indeed "Don't forget to go upstairs of the weapons shop and speak with the people there...They will give you a tutorial for the rest of the game."

That's what I'm going with :jess:

Tifa speaks in tongues that are...unnatural :shifty:

[Ryushikaze]

No, she speaks in tongues that were Sony translated, as does Aerith.

This guy... Are sick.

[Kawaii Ryûkishi]

"...Hmm. That's how you'll fool them."

".........Hmmmmmmm. So that's how you fooled them."

"Poo, I uh, mean, Sir...Hurry..."


Consider yourself lucky if you can make it out of Midgar without getting an aneurysm.

[vorpal blade]

Whoever translated that line (about the weapons man) must not have known it was a woman. Or... maybe it was a man. She's not exaclty womany in appearance, y'know.

[Duncan]

I always thought it was a man, but I never really looked that closely.

[Alive-Cat]

I'm 100% certain she's a woman. And anyway, she's downstairs. On the first floor of that building.

[Dr. Acula]

Maybe theres some secret stairs that lead to the second floor of Seventh Heaven, and the guy there gives you the Masamune?

It could happen.

[eestlinc]

she's referring to the traveler in Kalm who gives you the good stuff at the end of the game. He's upstairs.

[LunarWeaver]

she's referring to the traveler in Kalm who gives you the good stuff at the end of the game. He's upstairs.

=O.

I am in complete awe of the translation all over again.

[Griff]

you have to search harder, it's nigh impossible to find. But when you do you will be rewarded by Tifa coming upstairs behind you, eventually leading to a special "hot coffee" FMV.

[Comet]

isnt that in GTA: san andreas?

[KentaRawr!]

isnt that in GTA: san andreas?

No. In GTA: San Andreas, you have to mod the game before you can get them naked.

[MJN SEIFER]

I'm 100% certain she's a woman. And anyway, she's downstairs. On the first floor of that building.

It's a man.

[McLovin']

Lets say it was a transvestite...like Cloud.

[Griff]

isnt that in GTA: san andreas?

Shhh! I'm trying to clear the forum of horny fanboys.

[Levian]

I never found that weapon salesman on my first run through, but that's mainly because I was 11 and that's the year I started learning English. :D I didn't pick up much of the story, but I liked the pretty graphics.

[Aralith]

she's referring to the traveler in Kalm who gives you the good stuff at the end of the game. He's upstairs.
Not that I'm doubting you or anything, but where did you come by this knowledge? It seems to make sense to me, but I'd just like to see your source. You have piqued my interest.

[eestlinc]

I have no source other than my own imagination. That's just the first thing I think of when I read that line (after having already played through the game of course). I think it's because I'm used to cryptic lines in games that don't ever seem to mean anything (FFVI "behind the stairwell" line, or TLOZ stuff the old man says about doors and stuff). I seriously doubt that Tifa is really referring to the Kalm Traveller, but he does live upstairs (in Kalm, though, not Midgar), he gives you some stuff which could be considered weapons, he's part of some secret sideplot, etc. Of course, I think they just added the WEAPON sidequests in the American version, so it would seem very unlikely that Tifa would even refer to that quest in story dialogue. But wouldn't it be cooler if she did?

[Markus. D]

*cough* the roof.

[Kawaii Ryûkishi]

It wouldn't make any sense for Tifa to be referring to the Kalm traveler, especially since she says "the Weapons Shop man," not just "the weapons man."

[MJN SEIFER]

Besides how would she Know about something that happens so late in the game? Besides why would that be said in Midgar and not Kalm?

[aquatius]

There is a man in the entrance of the multi story shack near 7th heaven who is shooting a weird skull sculpture, he says that the guy upstairs will teach you.

[Weimar Pluto Knight VII]

Well, I happen to have FFVII International. Oh shoot, my Japanese PS1 is at home. Anybody else have one of the Japanese FFVII's that can translate what she says? If it's different then she might be referring to the guy in Kalm (in International and supposed to be in English).

[CStrife]

I think Tifa was drunk when she said that to Cloud!!:) (Barret is a bad influence...)

[Cloudane]

Meh, she just means go see the tutorial guy in the weapons shop. Upstairs.

It's just part of the extremely bad translation that is Final Fantasy VII's script :D Most of it was fixed in the PC version, but certain lines including that one still slipped through.

I'd be willing to bet that "to give" in Japanese is the same word as "to impart knowledge" - or something along those lines - and so it was mis-translated from "The man upstairs in the weapons shop has something to teach you".

If we took the badly translated script *too* seriously, we'd all be busy dying to that first boss (the robotic scorpion thing) by attacking it while it's tail's up.

[Kryton87]

Well I know for a fact, (I'm taking a class) that usually in Japanese they don't distinguish sexes when discussing other people. Personal pronouns other than "me" and "you" are この　ひと or kono hito, which means "this person". I don't know how much that helps, but it can explain some reasons behind translation errors.

[Ryushikaze]

Well I know for a fact, (I'm taking a class) that usually in Japanese they don't distinguish sexes when discussing other people. Personal pronouns other than "me" and "you" are この　ひと or kono hito, which means "this person". I don't know how much that helps, but it can explain some reasons behind translation errors.

Well, they can, as in 'ano onna no ko', but yes, they usually omit gender designators unless necessary to keep them in.

[oddler]

Do you have the greatest hits version? What a pile of ish. I have it and there is one scene where someone says something about Jenova and her name is completely misspelled. I was like :Oo: .

Oh, but anyway. All the breast implants went to her head and she wasn't thinking straight when she said that. She obviously means the person with the "All" materia in the room with the tutorials.

[Scream1008]

If we took the badly translated script *too* seriously, we'd all be busy dying to that first boss (the robotic scorpion thing) by attacking it while it's tail's up.

Oh my God yes. That confused me immensely the first play-through.

[RoBoDunK]

If we took the badly translated script *too* seriously, we'd all be busy dying to that first boss (the robotic scorpion thing) by attacking it while it's tail's up.

Oh my God yes. That confused me immensely the first play-through.

Yup that hapened to me to but it was the third time I didn't read it the first or second time, the first time I didn't have a memory card but i live through the slaughter, second i died but that was because i was obsessed in killing the motherfu**er.:mad2:

[Yliette]

Or it could probably be just a glitch. Just like when Aeris said "This man are sick." :tongue:

And that "I want to be a Blitzball when I grow up." in FFX. :tongue:

[Weimar Pluto Knight VII]

Whoa, you mean someone actually says that in FFX? It must be only text.

[Cloudane]

Yeah it's a text thing, I remember that :p

[opiumcloud]

"I want to be a blitzball when I grow up" was a joke, not a translation error. It means he's a hyperactive kid.

[MasterX]

Don't get me started in FFVII's freequint missuse off gramer. It occured in many scenes, such as our lovable "This man are sick." But if it wasn't for FFVII's simple obvious "mistakes", then it would lose it's innocent quality. And yes, it was a BIIIG mistranslation on Square's part. For amusement purposes, Square made it's mark, but if they actually intended to properly translate the Japanese version, they would spellcheck it like mad. And for that, I say, "For shame, you laid-back dictionary rejects!"

(Note: I really do respect Square, so I'm restraining myself from going beyond in terms of insults, but they did a good job by keeping the grammar at the same pace as the graphics.)