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View Full Version : Why do women get so angry when I tell them their place is to make sandwiches?



DK
10-08-2006, 11:00 PM
Hello hello hello once again, wonderful world of Eyes on Final Fantasy! It is I, your friendly neighbourhood Site Staffer, DK! You all know me, you've seen me around countless times, admiring my oh so sexy body and soft yet manly lips, rugged jawline, perfectly coifed hair and the rest of that good stuff, no doubt. :drool:

But alas! Your heroic friend DK has had some problems of late! Problems with those gorgeous beautiful sexy...women! Yes, everybody should know by now. DK loves women! They're goddesses! Beautiful creatures that I would like to put on a pedistal in my garage and stare at every day. And of course, you know women all over the world love DK. How could they not, what with my being generally perfect in womens eyes the world over! (That's what I think, anyway. :drool:)

But yes...recently, it appears women are upset with my ideals! DK can't understand why they are. :( We all know that women belong in the kitchen...right? Everyone knows that women are naturally programmed to make dinner! It's what god intended them for! Your friendly neighbourhood DK knows this, because he is so perfect that god invited him for tea (served by FEMALE angels!) and told him the secrets of mankind. :cool:

Yet, when DK tells this to the women of the world, they get upset! WHY do they get upset with DK? I'm not asking them to pop out a baby or anything, which seems to upset them too for some reason, although I can't imagine WHY myself, DK popped four out before breakfast this morning, see. Using my finely toned abs, incase any of you sexy goddesses were wondering. :love:

But, seriously! WHY do they get so angry? All DK has to do is tell them it's their god given task to slave away over a hot stove and make him food, and occasionally clean the house, and they go stir crazy! IT'S THE NATURAL ORDER OF THINGS, DON'T BLAME THE DK LADIES!

So DK was wondering if you good people could shed some light on the situation for him! DK has to go now and use the stairmaster to tone his already statuesque ass, but have no fear! He'll be back! And hopefully you'll be able to tell him why it is that women hate this so much!

Farewell!

Rye
10-08-2006, 11:01 PM
Get your b*tch ass back in the kitchen and make me some PAH, woman. :mad2:

I Took the Red Pill
10-08-2006, 11:01 PM
. And of course, you know women all over the world love DK. How could they not, what with my being generally perfect in womens eyes the world over! This thread discriminates against men attracted to you imho.

eestlinc
10-08-2006, 11:01 PM
what the hell? make your own damned sandwiches.

Venom
10-08-2006, 11:01 PM
Maybe you didnt lay it on them hard enough.

Raistlin
10-08-2006, 11:02 PM
Yeah, seriously, DK. I tell Jess to get into the kitchen and make me some food, and she does it like a good Christian <s>slave</s> girlfriend. Most women just have problems.

escobert
10-08-2006, 11:04 PM
They get upset because the know they could have wonderful Bert who, does cook AND clean!:cool: that's why DK!

Shauna
10-08-2006, 11:05 PM
I hate you forever for that post Dan! >=(

Decessus
10-08-2006, 11:05 PM
The oh-so-wonderfull Decessus is puzzled as well!

Twisted Tinkerbell
10-08-2006, 11:06 PM
If a guy told me it was my place I'd be chasing him with the knife for about a week.

Ryth
10-08-2006, 11:07 PM
Pfft women and their ideals. :rolleyes2

The Devil Man
10-08-2006, 11:07 PM
Forget the women DK, I'll make you sandwiches!

I am a great cook :hyper: I am a master chef!

Jowy
10-08-2006, 11:08 PM
Sometimes I wish I were half as cool as Dan.

Shlup
10-08-2006, 11:09 PM
My husband is better at making sammiches than me. ;_;

escobert
10-08-2006, 11:10 PM
You just don't count anyway.

Breine
10-08-2006, 11:11 PM
Sometimes I wish I were half as cool as Dan.

Rye
10-08-2006, 11:13 PM
The oh-so-wonderfull Decessus is puzzled as well!

And again, Decessus is 3 steps behind of what's going on. :nonono:


Yeah, seriously, DK. I tell Jess to get into the kitchen and make me some food, and she does it like a good Christian <s>slave</s> girlfriend. Most women just have problems.

That's because when I'm slaving over a hot oven for you, I'm doing it as a child of God and setting an example of the place in life for women. :bigsmile:

Drift
10-08-2006, 11:14 PM
i bet the ladies love you're 12' sub DK ;)

Breine
10-08-2006, 11:14 PM
Get your b*tch ass back in the kitchen and make me some PAH, woman. :mad2:

By the way, this cracked me up xD

Decessus
10-08-2006, 11:17 PM
The oh-so-wonderfull Decessus is puzzled as well!

And again, Decessus is 3 steps behind of what's going on. :nonono:

I'm afraid it's far more than 3.

theundeadhero
10-08-2006, 11:42 PM
I just want someone to make me a sandwhich. I don't care what gender you are.

Cz
10-08-2006, 11:45 PM
Becuase you don't show 'em who's boss. :mad2:

Captain Maxx Power
10-08-2006, 11:48 PM
And there was me convinced that DK was actually the token really gay guy, then all of a sudden, it's all about the ladies!

Am I right in thinking that this is a sly dig at a certain someone?

abrojtm
10-08-2006, 11:58 PM
Yes

When they say no, just cut off their hands so they can't make anything anymore.

Mister Adequate
10-09-2006, 12:01 AM
I wholly agree! I'm glad to see Wesley has Jess under control, as it ought to be. Too many women are too full of notions of individuality and - get this - personal rights! Hahaha, as though they are anything other than servants! :bigsmile:

sephirothishere
10-09-2006, 12:05 AM
cripple their spirits and then theyll make the sandwiches ; )........

KentaRawr!
10-09-2006, 12:14 AM
This thread...

It had so much potential! It could have mixed Devil Man's words wittingly instead of stuffing words straight down Devil Man's throat! But no! You had to go with the stuffing! :mad2:

Jess
10-09-2006, 12:16 AM
What type of sandwich would you like, Dan? :jess:

theundeadhero
10-09-2006, 12:55 AM
When they say no, just cut off their hands so they can't make anything anymore.You'll never get a sandwhich made that way.

Shiny
10-09-2006, 01:07 AM
Pimp slap her. It always works for me. :choc2:

LunarWeaver
10-09-2006, 01:08 AM
Lol, as if women are smart enough to make sandwiches at all.

RiseToFall
10-09-2006, 01:09 AM
Lol, as if women are smart enough to make sandwiches at all.

You just crossed the line Lunar.

Decessus
10-09-2006, 01:14 AM
Lol, as if women are smart enough to make sandwiches at all.

You just crossed the line Lunar.

Yeah, that 'lol' was unnecessary.

Skarr
10-09-2006, 01:19 AM
Maybe if you said please.

Maybe the world will bow to the Chin Patrol.

Yeah right.

Freya
10-09-2006, 01:30 AM
Maybe the world will bow to the Chin Patrol.

Hahaha yeah right, like that's ever gonna happen.

If you buy me some new pants i'll gladly make you breakfast, lunch, dinner and anything inbetween, for about a week. Then you have to go out and get me something else.

Vikeve
10-09-2006, 01:44 AM
Yeah, I don't get mad i get me some new cloths.:D

I can't cook for life:( wow that made no sense but im sure you get the point.:confused:

Mister Adequate
10-09-2006, 01:48 AM
Maybe the world will bow to the Chin Patrol.

Jesus, you're as bad as Tommy Sheridan is with socialism. =/ Not everything is about Chin Patrol, you know.

Mogi
10-09-2006, 07:19 AM
Wait....

I must have a natural talent for making sandwiches!

Or I'm dreaming again....

Rainecloud
10-09-2006, 07:35 AM
That was a very good impression, DK.

Oh, and I make my own sandwiches, because I'm a perfectionist.

Rusty
10-09-2006, 07:54 AM
I don't like sandwiches - but I do make pretty good ones. I'll make you one if you ask nicely.

Meat Puppet
10-09-2006, 08:09 AM
Sometimes I wish women would tell me to make them sandwiches. But they don't. There was one, but she was just joking. A foul joke. What a letdown.

Odaisť Gaelach
10-09-2006, 11:15 AM
Damn, I can't even begin to count the amount of times I've been slapped.

I know that one was when a girl complimented me on my beard, and I stroked her chin and said, "Well, yours ain't too bad either"...

...now I'm hungry.

Sparky
10-09-2006, 04:45 PM
Are all of you stupid, women should be treated with respect no matter what they do wrong. Also, you all should be making the women sandwiches, wait my bad, you should be making them full course meals that would fill their stomachs.

Reles
10-09-2006, 05:34 PM
If they prove that they're more of a man than I am, then I'll make them a sandwich, after that they can starve for all I care.

bipper
10-09-2006, 05:37 PM
I don't like sandwiches - but I do make pretty good ones. I'll make you one if you ask nicely.

Woman! Make me a god damned sandwich, please!

Doesn't sound right. That please throws it all off!:tongue:

~SapphireStar~
10-09-2006, 05:38 PM
what the hell? make your own damned sandwiches.

StarChild
10-09-2006, 05:39 PM
Sometimes I wish women would tell me to make them sandwiches. But they don't. There was one, but she was just joking. A foul joke. What a letdown.

go make me a sandwich! =)

I cook, and I'm pretty good cook, but when told to make a sandwich, I'll very politely make it for you and then shove it down your pants :D

not really.

Alive-Cat
10-09-2006, 07:01 PM
What is a women?

Huckleberry Quin
10-09-2006, 07:26 PM
I make awesome sandwiches. No really, they are always about 3 inches thick. So tasty.

DK should make his own sandwiches, he could take some pork from himself, as he's clearly a chauvinist pig :bigsmile:

Oh yes, you know that burned.

XxSephirothxX
10-09-2006, 07:59 PM
Dan, you just need the right equipment. (http://www.poster.net/south-park/south-park-cartman-4001497.jpg)

SammieBabe
10-10-2006, 02:29 AM
I am so hot for you now, Dan. ;)
I'll make you all the sandwiches you can stand...:jokey:

yunacy
10-10-2006, 04:46 AM
not all woman belong in the kitchen

Decessus
10-10-2006, 05:04 AM
not all woman belong in the kitchen

Some of them belong in a coffin. :laugh:

Mogi
10-10-2006, 05:10 AM
I just got finished eating a sandwich.
It was good.
I made it.

yunacy
10-10-2006, 06:02 AM
not all woman belong in the kitchen

Some of them belong in a coffin. :laugh:

thats not very nice:p

Giga Guess
10-10-2006, 02:25 PM
Yeah, seriously, DK. I tell Jess to get into the kitchen and make me some food, and she does it like a good Christian <s>slave</s> girlfriend. Most women just have problems.

That's because when I'm slaving over a hot oven for you, I'm doing it as a child of God and setting an example of the place in life for women. :bigsmile:
[/SIZE]

And wondering if you'd get caught for slipping in some rat poison.

Sparky
10-10-2006, 03:17 PM
not all woman belong in the kitchen

I think that women are to be spoiled until hell frezzes over.

Huckleberry Quin
10-10-2006, 07:27 PM
Antarctica's working on it.