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My_car_is_faster_than_you
10-12-2006, 07:11 AM
Hey guys,

It's me, My_car again. I've been writing a story recently and have drawn characters to go along with the story to help me better visualize how the story will flow.

Well, I need a second (hopefully more) opinion because my other personality isn't very helpful for feedback. JK.

First off, here's a character (Ireina), and I need to know if she fits the profile I've listed below. Please be honest and tell me if she matches, doesn't match, or if there are a few suggestions to fix her. (Keep in mind that these are very rough drawings).

Then, there is her sister (Ascelia). Same thing, want to know if she fits the profile.


Ireina Victoria Gianni
20 years old
Summary: She's a swordsmaiden, cold demeanor, introverted, intelligent, quick witted, and sarcastic.

Ascelia Gianni
15 years old
Summary: She's an archer, hyperactive, lonely, love hungry, feisty, but deep down inside she's a sweetie.

I am very open to criticism and not easily offended. Tell me what I need to do to improve these characters to match their profile, etc. etc, tell me if they suck, I don't care. Just as long as it's honest.

Thanks.

Kawaii Ryűkishi
10-12-2006, 07:40 AM
It's hard to tell how tall a person is or how much she weighs just by looking at her head.

My_car_is_faster_than_you
10-12-2006, 08:38 AM
It's hard to tell how tall a person is or how much she weighs just by looking at her head.

Fixed, height and weight removed to avoid confusion, or something to the likes of it. Those were there for no real reason except for me copying the profile I wrote over.

Anyway, the main thing I was looking a match in was the temperment and personality. Do they look like they fit the personality described?

Kawaii Ryűkishi
10-12-2006, 09:17 PM
I'm not sure an introverted person would bother to apply make-up or style her hair. Although, she could. People are funny like that.

Everything else looks pretty congruous.

Christmas
10-23-2006, 03:32 PM
Rinoa!! :bigsmile:

Evastio
10-23-2006, 11:47 PM
They look like they fit their characters.

The 2nd one's smile doesn't fit her well though. She looks a little too happy for her personality.