If you could write a catch-phrase for any FF game, what would it be? [Archive]

Vincent, Thunder God

11-24-2006, 07:04 PM

I made this thread ages ago on another forum. I thought that, for the more creative members, this might be fun.

Imagine you are working at Square-Enix in the publicity department. One of your jobs is to create an interesting catch-phrase or slogan for an FF Game. (It can be any one from 1-12, or even a spin-off like Before Crisis). What would it be? Your catch-phrase can be serious, humourous or anything in between.

I've got one for FF X-2: "The only game with an algebraic title!"

Zeromus_X

11-24-2006, 07:05 PM

FFXII: The one Final Fantasy with the most resemblances to Star Wars yet!

Goldenboko

11-24-2006, 07:13 PM

FFXII- Play FFXII and get your license.... board.
FFIV- Rosa picking Petals off a dandilion "Kain, Cecil, Kain, Cecil". She may have a tough time choosing, but we know you'll play FFIV!
FFI- Play the game that started a series which wasted the life of millions!
FFVIII- If you hate planting we don't recommend this game!
FFXIII- Wow, can't wait until the titles get more complitcated...(FFCLXIV)

Bart's Friend Milhouse

11-24-2006, 07:47 PM

FFVIII - Worth your time, money, hassle, attention, sweat, blood, tears, efforts, love, laughter, stress and determination

Levian

11-24-2006, 08:19 PM

FFXI - Connecting people
FFTA - Don't leave home without it
FFIX - Maybe she's born with it - maybe it's Maybelline (Garnet's forehead)
FFVII - Because you're worth it. :cool:

Griff

11-24-2006, 11:45 PM

To quote Adam Sessler on his review of DoC:
FF7- The game that was emo before emo was emo

Firo Volondé

11-25-2006, 04:29 AM

NB: This is based off the trailer.
FFXIII - The game that did what every title since VIII has been leading to... female main character!

FFVII: There's something about Cloud...

FFT/FFTA: And you thought the battle system couldn't get any slower!

FFIV: The greatest twist in video-gaming history! The bad guy's from the moon!

DarkLadyNyara

11-25-2006, 04:55 AM

FFI- Play the game that started a series which wasted the life of millions!

Goldenboco wins. :D

Frozen Phantom

11-25-2006, 05:00 AM

XI: Come give even more money to us

I: Come see the begining of the rise of FF, and the fall of lives

FFX: Final fantasy: now with voices

Wolf Kanno

11-25-2006, 08:37 AM

Vivisteiner

11-25-2006, 12:12 PM

FFIX: If youve ever wanted to see a fat, talking, blue elephant and a transvestite team up as villains...

Dell

11-25-2006, 02:28 PM

FFIX: If youve ever wanted to see a fat, talking, blue elephant and a transvestite team up as villains...

LOL.

FFX: Follow the adventures of seven dwarves as in their quest of defeating the giant whale! PS: This game sucked.

FFVII: Fans of bitch should buy this game, the main character had to fight the love of mother and her son, Bitchroth. There's also a cool character named Vincent, he kick his own ass. Awesome.

ama124

11-25-2006, 02:37 PM

To quote Adam Sessler on his review of DoC:
FF7- The game that was emo before emo was emo

lol :D i remember that. I love Xplay. That show is hilarious.

Some of these are good but i'm to dumb and uncreative to think of one :)

Nasarian Altimeros

11-25-2006, 02:55 PM

FFI: Outdated nonsense.

FFII: Outdated nonsense.

FFIII: Surprisingly non-crap

FFIV: Few interesting invigorations help to cover the fact that it’s outdated nonsense.

FFV: No, we can’t believe that people think that the game-play makes up for the cookie-cutter characters.

FFVI: No seriously. Try and play this game without seeing a single glitch.

FFVII: For the love of God, at least play the game before watching AC. Then at least you will just look like a fanboy when you say you like that /xxx.gif/xxx.gif/xxx.gif/xxx.gifty movie.

FFVIII: Several years from now we will reveal that this game was just a 40 hour technical demo.

FFIX: For all those assholes who just read the abstract summaries of 100 page reports. Bastards.

FFX: ZOMG TEH LULU FAP FAP FAP I CAME

FFX-2: See above.

FFXI: Haha, as if FF fans weren’t sad enough before we brough MMOs into the equation.

FFXII: Hurry up and release it in NZ so I can ditch it already.

Twilight Edge

11-25-2006, 04:20 PM

FFI - The ripoff from the famous web-comic, 8-bit theater. All copyright belongs to Brian Clewinger.

FFIV - Unless you like seeing damsels in distress that yells "Oh, save me, Cecil!" then don't play.

FFVI - Good one. Tarzan and world's best evil laugh are contained in this game.

FFVII - This game is for people who are into gravity. Or hair gel.

FFVIII - Prepare for an array of girls ranging from hands down sexy to hideosly ugly!

FFIX - A remake of Lethal Weapon. And it's a Grand one. Comes along with a monkey figure.

FFX - And they say Squeenix games don't have bugs.

FFX-2 - A tutorial for fashion desginers.

FFXI - Another MMO. That's it.

FFXII - If your not into politics and girls that wear stuff like those in FFX-2, this is not recommended.

Peter_20

11-25-2006, 04:22 PM

FFVII - "You know you want this game"

Griff

11-25-2006, 06:58 PM

FFX-2: Having horny teenage boys searching for a nude patch since 2003.

FFVIII: Gun + Sword = Fun

FFIX: Ooh, Soft

Vincent, Thunder God

11-25-2006, 07:15 PM

Dragon Mage

11-26-2006, 01:26 AM

FF7-"I pidy teh foo!'" If Mr. T likes this game, you know that you will too!

FFX- Save the world from a giant, flying, telekinetic whale!

Frozen Phantom

11-26-2006, 01:28 AM

FF7-play the game that fully started the final fantasy religion

DarkLadyNyara

11-26-2006, 03:16 AM

FFII- It's a game that rewards masochism. What's not to love?

blackmage_nuke

11-26-2006, 05:40 AM

FFVI - Ever wanted to beat up a clown? Here is your chance

jill

11-26-2006, 07:10 PM

FFIX-Where you can get pwned by a girly man...twice!

McLovin'

11-26-2006, 08:14 PM

FF4- Is the moon really made out of cheese?

FF7- 7 is a magic number.

FF8- Anti Social? Think there is no hope? This game proves a hot blue clothe wearing girl can be coming your way.

FF9- And you thought we were out of character ideas.

FFX- No Moogles!

FF11- Like WoW but with F's.

Brennan

11-26-2006, 08:47 PM

All: The game that has final, but never ends.
FF7: The giant sword explains it all, KILL!
FF1: The game that the main characters don't speak.
FF2: A guy named Guy.
FF6: Do you hate circus freaks? Then kick Kefka's ass!
FF8: The gun that doesn't shoot bullets.
FF9: Tinkle tinkle.

Vivisteiner

11-26-2006, 09:39 PM

FF8: If your a child, its your fate to buy this game...(Just dont forget to play it)

FF10: Having trouble choosing the right religion? Learn how to become a Yevonite. :D

Griff

11-26-2006, 09:57 PM

FFV- Questioning the genders of pirates for way too long

Wolf Kanno

11-27-2006, 05:36 AM

FFVIII - It's Charlie Brown all grown up,except we euthanized the damn dog

FFIV - "Spoony Bards Included"

FFV - The game where the girls look like guys and the guys look like... um girls... uh... the game with sexual identity isuues?

FFX-2 - Hey, I've got an idea, let's make a sequel to FFX that sucks so bad, that people will forget how abysmal the original was!

Se-davvero-esiste

11-27-2006, 05:41 AM

FFVIII: Square has finally let Hot Topic determine characters!
FFIX: We're sorry for Final Fantasy VIII.
FFX: We're sorry for Final Fantasy IX.
FFXI: You'll play anything we put out, won't you?
FFIV: It used to be Final Fantasy II, America!
FF:MQ: We think you're too stupid to play the real games!

Darth Cid

11-27-2006, 05:51 AM

FFI: Saved the company, ruined your brain, any questions?

FFII: The Empire Strikes Back!

FFIII: The only game that gets a COMPLETE makeover!

FFIV: Become a terrorist delivering "packages", steal crystals, highjack airships, and destroy robotic giants. It's FF: GTA!

FFV: Play the pimp-vs-evil-tree verison of FFIII.

FFVI: This game had mobile suits called Magiteks, what kind of name is that?

FFVII: Spiky-haired dude with a big sword who appears to be on a period. Yes, this got the rest of the world interested in Final Fantasy.

FFVIII: A guy who appears to be on a worst period than the spiky-haired dude, what's with us and dudes on periods? Thought only girls get those.

FFIX: Finally, people who act their gender. Home of references and David Bowie lookalikes.

FFX: Ladies & Gentlemen Meg Ryan...I mean, Tidus.

FFX-2: To save Meg Ry-...Tidus, Yuna what any self-respecting lady would do, turn into a Lara Croft ripoff wearing less than half of what she wore one game ago, traveling around in an airship captained by her cousin who has a crush on her...that's the High Summoner Spira loves so much.

Se-davvero-esiste

11-27-2006, 06:00 AM

FFX-2: To save Meg Ry-...Tidus, Yuna what any self-respecting lady would do, turn into a Lara Croft ripoff wearing less than half of what she wore one game ago, traveling around in an airship captained by her cousin who has a crush on her...that's the High Summoner Spira loves so much.

Doesn't happen often, but that made me laugh out loud. Thanks.

Martyr

11-27-2006, 06:02 AM

These are funny. I'll try.

FF1: We'll throw you for a loop.
FF2: 3100 Damage against the best armor in the game! WTF?
FF3: More Airships than you can crash into a boulder.
FF4: Shiny Happy People Holding Hands!
FF5: (The Pirate is Hottt)
FF6: Pretty in Pink
FF7: Pretty in Black.

LunarWeaver

11-27-2006, 07:29 AM

FFI: Not Bankrupt After All
FFII: Just Kidding, Lol
FFIII: This One We're Serious Again
FFIV: People Dying Left and Right Before Aeris Even Existed
FFV: The Job System You Always Wanted Us to Reuse with a Good Story
FFVI: Guess the Main Character and Win a Free Vacation to Bora-Bora
FFVII: Quick, Love It Before It's Cool to Hate
FFVIII: He's Not Based Off Gackt, Let It Go
FFIX: Worth 50 Bucks Just to Hear Vivi's Theme
FFX: The One Where Players Hypocritically Constantly Whine about a Main Character They Define as Being Unlikable because He Whines.
FFX-2: Nooj Haha
FFXI: Join Now and Learn Why MMO's Will Make Humanity Disgust You
FFXII: More Weapons than Characters, What Else Do You Want

Vincent, Thunder God

11-27-2006, 10:30 PM

ljkkjlcm9

11-27-2006, 11:49 PM

FFI: What?!? You've never heard of Dr. Unne?
FFII: Death around every corner... literally
FFIII: Can't decide what character type you want, switch at anytime!
FFIV: Too many people died in FFII, let's have them all live this time!
FFV: Even better than FFIII, you can keep stuff from previous jobs! Oh wait, that makes it too easy? Damnit!
FFVI: More PCs than you know what to do with, even when you have 3 parties
FFVII: Yeah we ditched Nintendo. Oh you want to know about this game? Overrated really...
FFVIII: Amnesia. Time Compression. Girlfriends? All right we're confused too.
FFIX: What did you like about the old games? We'll toss it all together as best we can.
FFX: More whining than a newborn
FFX-2: Feminism gone sexy
FFXI: We want to make a ton of money too!
FFXII: Our battle system has worked for 10 games, let's change it!

THE JACKEL

Griff

11-28-2006, 12:00 AM

FF7- The Mcdonalds of fanboyism, over 99 billion served

Darth Cid

11-28-2006, 01:28 AM

New Set

FFI: I hit all the black magic shops and I STILL can't find Hakoden.

FFII: We decided to parody The Westside Story, "I just fought alongside a girl named Maria!"

FFIII: The final boss is a cloud.

FFIV: The one where the main character goes from dark to light...like Michael Jackson.

FFV: The main character is named Butz?

FFVI: A clown takes over the world, I knew the circus was up to something damnit.

FFVII: It's four games after FFIII, and the main chacter is now named Cloud.

FFVIII: ...Whatever.

FFIX: The Matrix has you.

FFX: A guy who learns to wield a heavy sword in 0.67 seconds.

FFX-2: Save the world against a guy who looks like the guy who learns to wield a heavy sword in 0.67 seconds.

Frozen Phantom

11-28-2006, 03:06 AM

FFI: a loop of time and magic crystals, whats not cliché about that?

FFII: taking stat grinding to an all new level

FFIII: now we have jobs in our fantasys to?!?!

FFIV: A wedding in a FF OH THE HORROR!!!

FFV: I just finished my day job...why would I want another one?

FFVI: lets throw alot of random characters into a game...backstores? who cares.

FFVII: just ignore it...maybe some day its ego will die...

FFVIII: wow...the gunblade...and I thought Square was running out of ideas...

FFIX: Take FF I-VI and chop it up to make a salad of ultimate evil!!!

FFX: Proving that whiners can actually kick ass

FFX-2: FINAL FANTASY DRESS UP!!!

FFXI: FF online...another way for square enix to waste even more of your time...

FFXII: Turn based gameplay in disguise...

FFT/FFTA: WTF? why is everything and everyone on a grid...wouldn't someone notice that by now?

Wolf Kanno

11-28-2006, 08:59 AM

A new set...

FFI - When you were imagining your "epic fantasy" adventure, did you ever think it would involve looking for a dead rat's tail for a dragon?

FFII - More Star Wars references than FFXII

FFIII - Are Onion Knights like Cabbage Patch Kids?

FFIV - Ever wanted to play a game where you started off as Darth Vader and then became Luke Skywalker? No I didn't think you did...

FFV - My party is composed of a guy named Butz, a cross-dresser, a prissy princess, a senile old man, and an even younger, prissier princess... I think I'll take "Luke Skywalker" back...

FFVI - The only game where the world ends and the game still insists that you have to do something about it.

FFVII - the only game where you actually hope the bad guys will win...

FFVIII - The game about love... Too bad that pretty much alienates the fanbase...

FFIX - Somehow, I always knew that FF's "roots" pertained to the secret war between Bobble Heads and the cast of the Rocky Horror Picture Show

FFX - Because Square hates you...

FFX-2 - Because god hates you...

FFXI - World Domination Plan Stage Two: Release an MMO

FFXII - Cause British actors make everything better. Right?...Right?!...

FFT - Our apology, for releasing FFVII

FFTA - Cause FFT was so good, we had to release this in order to maintain the cosmic balance:D

forgotten_fantasy

12-22-2006, 10:02 PM

FF1 - the first game of thousands
FF6 - here everyone of any relevance you meet is either a playable character or an enemy!
FF7 - you save the planet then wonder why you did it
FF9 - you could stop Kuja's evil plans or you could play a really good card game, the choice is yours
FF10 - the first and last of the DVD final fantasies
FF10-2 plus - get angry about how a transition has ruined the best series of games ever.
FF7 advent children - its a film it doesnt necessarily have to be that good

Vincent, Thunder God

12-23-2006, 02:26 AM

FFX -Proving that flashy graphics, voices, and decent music can make up for the abscence of good plot...

FFVII - The big sword is in no way compensating for anything lacking...

FFT - enraging religious zealots since 1998...

FFIX - FF now comes in super-deformed sizes...

FFII - Do you like repitition? Do we have a game for you...

FFVI - It has opera, it has to be educational...

FFXII - What if we combined FF, Star Wars, and LOTR?

FFXIII - Proving once again that "Fantasy" is an option over at SE...

FFVIII - It's Charlie Brown all grown up,except we euthanized the damn dog

FFIV - "Spoony Bards Included"

FFV - The game where the girls look like guys and the guys look like... um girls... uh... the game with sexual identity isuues?

FFX-2 - Hey, I've got an idea, let's make a sequel to FFX that sucks so bad, that people will forget how abysmal the original was!

A new set...

FFI - When you were imagining your "epic fantasy" adventure, did you ever think it would involve looking for a dead rat's tail for a dragon?

FFII - More Star Wars references than FFXII

FFIII - Are Onion Knights like Cabbage Patch Kids?

FFIV - Ever wanted to play a game where you started off as Darth Vader and then became Luke Skywalker? No I didn't think you did...

FFV - My party is composed of a guy named Butz, a cross-dresser, a prissy princess, a senile old man, and an even younger, prissier princess... I think I'll take "Luke Skywalker" back...

FFVI - The only game where the world ends and the game still insists that you have to do something about it.

FFVII - the only game where you actually hope the bad guys will win...

FFVIII - The game about love... Too bad that pretty much alienates the fanbase...

FFIX - Somehow, I always knew that FF's "roots" pertained to the secret war between Bobble Heads and the cast of the Rocky Horror Picture Show

FFX - Because Square hates you...

FFX-2 - Because god hates you...

FFXI - World Domination Plan Stage Two: Release an MMO

FFXII - Cause British actors make everything better. Right?...Right?!...

FFT - Our apology, for releasing FFVII

FFTA - Cause FFT was so good, we had to release this in order to maintain the cosmic balance:D

Wolf Kanno's catch-phrases are still my favourites.:) I actually chuckled at some of them, and any laughter from me is rare, so great work Wolfy.

Laddy

12-23-2006, 04:18 AM

Here's some.

FF1- A game involving elemental crystals, let's see.... Might and Magic VIII, Grandia III, yes, we are trensetters.

FF2- Boring characters... but wait! They have names that actually exist!

FF3- Precious Moments or 2D sprites, you decide!

FF4- It has twins.... very unrealistic acting ones... but twins!

FF5- Change classes and play as a crudely-named character!

FF6- THe only FF where the main character is fema.... wait, no main character because we want it that way!

FF7- It has two kitties in it... TWO!

FF8- Play as whiny teens froma military academy! WOO-HOO!

FF9- It is old-school, but 3D!

FF10- Play as a wimpy Abercrombie model!

FFX-2- An RPG for the whole Sorority!

FF11- Reviving of kitty people.... with skimpy outfits.

FF12- More Star War references than the amount of offensive jokes I made!

FF13- We give you absolutely no info, so proclaim how you can't wait!

FF20- It's a fan project, and it has actual politics!

FFT- THe main character has a ponytail!

FFTA- Waste your needless human life!

FFMQ- Because we thinkFF fans are idiots!

Wolf Kanno

12-23-2006, 08:44 AM

Here's some.

FF2- Boring characters... but wait! They have names that actually exist!

FF8- Play as whiny teens froma military academy! WOO-HOO!

FF10- Play as a wimpy Abercrombie model!

FF13- We give you absolutely no info, so proclaim how you can't wait!

FFMQ- Because we thinkFF fans are idiots!

These were pretty damn funny.:D

Thanks Vincent, I'll continue to try and amuse you...

NeoCracker

12-23-2006, 11:11 AM

FFI - The Game where swords are Shiny.
FFII - Proof that anyone can change.
FFIII - We make crappy 8 - bit characters Shiny and new.
FFIV - If you let someone beat the crap out of you, they will eventually dissapear, trust us.
FFV - Proves that Pimpin, is in fact, Easy.
FFVI - The Game of a Submariner.
FFMQ: We were too lazy to make it a challange.
FFVII - If we could have predicted all the CloudXSephiroth Fantasy's, we wouldn't have made this game.
FFVIII - We tried to make a game so horrible we could derail all the annoying VII fanboys, and instead brought about a generation of fans far worse than we could have imagined.
FFIX - We're sorry for our last two mistakes, please forgive us.
FFX - How we didn't go out of business after this one, we do not know.
FFX-2 - After X, VII, and VIII, we realized you people will buy anything we make, and this just proved it.
FFX-2(Yes, another one) - And you though FFMQ was easy.
FFXII - We felt bad for proving our last point with X-2, even we have hearts.
FFT - T.G. Cid will own you all.
FFTA - No Comment.

Laddy

12-23-2006, 05:33 PM

I marked all offensive ones with *.

FF1- Create people like a PC RPG, but, we make it uneccessary!

FF2- It started the empire-rebles craze!

FF3- Japan is better than you, so you finally get to get it!*

FF4- For transclass players.*

FF5- Boring, sooo boring, but it has a manly girl in it!*

FF6- The one that is really good.

FF7- Mr. T, a flower girl, and a depressed jerk save the world!*

FF8- This has the female lead with no past whatsoever, yet is major!

FF9- The end of jerky main characters.

FF10- The start of girly metrosexual characters.*

FFX-2- It sucks, but you'll buy it anyway!

FF11- It's online and chances are you're broke after a year playing of it.

FF12- It has a bizarrely deep-voiced character!

FF13- It...is...a game, I will tell you more if I could, (could as in, we haven't gotten to that part yet.)

FFT- So.... slow.

FFTA- Buy this or regret, then you will buy it and regret it!

FFMQ- It has a Q in the title!

Polnareff

12-27-2006, 05:55 PM

FF1: Saving Squaresoft's Ass Two Million Copies At a Time!

FF2: The One Where Masochism and Huge Egos Are Rewarded! Screw Magic! "HAY HIT ME WITH THAT RLY BIG SWORD LOLZ"

FF3: How Much Is That Bahamut In The Window?

FFVI: The One That Proves That Any Son of A Submariner Can Learn to Use Ultima By End Game! WTF!

FFVII: The First FF With a Crappy Translation! We Know, We Were Surprised Too.

FFVII (again): Invasion of the Plastic Chibi Dolls With No Mouths!

FFVIII: The Depletion of Square's Sanity Has Begun!

FFIX: See? Told Ya! We Included a Giant Clowny Thing Who Eats Frogs Just To Prove Our Insanity!

FFIX (again): Attack of the Metrosexual Masquerader!

FFX: Ever Wanted to Play As a Meg Ryan Clone in Lederhosen? No? Dammit! Oh Well You'll Play As One Anyway And You'll Like It Too By Cracky!

FFX (again): An FF With a Main Character Who Is a Boy But Looks Like a Girl But Sounds Like a Whiny Boy Who Looks Like a Girl And Wears Lederhosen!

FFX-2: A Game for the Testosterone-Deprived

FFT: One Hell of a Time Sink!

FFTA: A Neverending Story! No, We Mean It!

FFXII: We Did One Hell Of a Bangaa Job, That's For Sure!

FFXII (again): The Kind of Game You Wanna Buy in a Dark Alley Off Some Hooded Guy

FFMQ: Must....eeeeaat.....braaaaains....

play-on-4eva

12-29-2006, 06:31 PM

ffx-(shows wakka's hair) the future's bright, the future's orange

NINJA_Ryu

12-30-2006, 06:27 PM

FF3: Bored? Unemployed? Try thier jobs today!

FF4: Hamlet. A very deceptive hamlet without (most) of the angst!

FF1: Who ever said you needed a name to save the world?

Cruise Control

12-30-2006, 07:21 PM

FF7 - Ding, dong, the witch is dead!
FF8 - Aim for the face.
FF9 - OMG HOBBITS!
FF10 - Pubescant fantasies.
FF10-2 - Feminists suck.
FF11 - Get a significant other.
FF12 - You>God

Goldenboko

12-31-2006, 04:07 AM

FFX- Not playing this game is a Sin.

Odaisé Gaelach

12-31-2006, 05:05 AM

Final Fantasy VII: It's amazing what you can do with Lego.

starseeker

12-31-2006, 11:46 AM

FF1: How to create a game where the characters have names but no personality.
FF2: How to be a convincing double agent.
FF4: Death isn't permanent!
FF5: How to wage war on an emulator.
FF6: The only time the villain actually succeeds.
FF7: Let's mess with each other's heads.
FF8: Even the creators don't understand this game.
FF9: Bringing chibi back.
FFX: The only masculine character is a ghost.
FFX-2: Lap dancers fight a whiny emo bastard whose girlfriend left him.

FFXIII: Bring final fantasy into the Matrix

forgotten_fantasy

01-05-2007, 09:44 PM

FF1 - yep this definitely is our final fantasy
FF2 - we lied
FF3 - get a real job, play FF3
FF4 - it's too late to change the name now
FF6 - Teach us how to blitz!
FF7 - It's a bird! It's a plane! It's....... Sephiroth!
FF9 - so many moogles, so little time
FF10 - Who likes short shorts?
FF10-2 - Square enix - accepting donations now

Wolf Kanno

01-06-2007, 09:41 AM

Another set... god I hope I don't get banned for some of these...

FF1 - The game that started it all... and by that I mean it started the generation of people who name their characters certain four letter words...

FFII - Let's "empower" our players by starting the game with their character's home being burned to the ground and then have them be beaten painfully into the ground by the invading army.

FFIII - The game involves Onion Knights (think Cabbage patch kids) that end up fighting an evil cloud. It's like a Care Bear movie, just with more violence...

FFIV - You basically play as Michael Jackson. You start off black and end up white. You ruin young children's lives. You battle zombies, and the final battle takes place on the moon.

FFV - The first FF with an enviromental theme about not exploiting the limited resources of the planet... oh and you fight an evil tree...

FFVI - Can't sleep clown will eat me...

FFVII - The game that gave us "Shiny little golden string of hope" hopefully your girlfriend won't use it in reference to your...

FFVIII - The Real World: Final Fantasy

FFIX - Next time on "Where are they now?" Orko from He-Man!

Orko: So after the catastrophe that ensued from He-Man admitting to what we all knew about him to begin with. I had a hard time going from rehab clinic to rehab clinic for my addiction to "magic dust", not to mention my brief marriage with Cher; I don't advise doing either. Finally in 2000, my friend David Bowie called me up and said he had a role that would be perfect for me. He was going to play some crazy monkey man sky pirate actor thief thingy... I don't know either but it's David Bowie and we just let the man do as he pleases, cause he brings the magic to the production. And I was going to be the depressed magic thingy and I thought "why the hell not? I'll just stop taking my anti-depressants and I'm there! Bam! Money in the bank"

FFX - The main character is a figment of your imagination, the heroine has the personality of interactive furniture, and the one guy is a zombie. Yes truly the most realistic cast of characters in an RPG...

FFX-2 - Put your hand in a blender and turn it on. Good, now know what playing this game feels like.

FFXI - The first step towards getting FF fans to interact with real people... oh who am I kidding. FF fans are the farthest thing from real people...

FFXII - The game that will make you think unholy thoughts about your sister's pet rabbit.

FFXIII - This is so original!!! It has trains going through post apolcalyptic locals, gunblades, and a chick who looks like Yuna... wait a minute...

Dr. Acula

01-06-2007, 10:56 AM

FF1= Play as a doormat! Or four of 'em!

FF2= Play as a TALKING doormat!

FF4= Hey, the villian decides he isn't one, a new villian steps into his spaceboots, the dead come back to life and they all become kings and queens! What ISN'T to like?

FF5= Once again, all are royalty, except one ass. His name, ironically, is Butz.

FF6= Do you want clowns, bad translations and more characters than you can handle? FF6 is for you!

FF7= If you want to destroy your brain, just TRY understanding this game's storyline (or Cloud's backstory)!

FF8= 3 sorceresses, all of 'em evil for no reason!

FFTA= Play FFT first, and you'll probably hate this game!

*NOTE* I like all these games (with the possible exception of FF2) so I didn't mean any offence with these. Please don't hurt me.

DarkLadyNyara

01-06-2007, 09:20 PM

Another set... god I hope I don't get banned for some of these...

FFIII - The game involves Onion Knights (think Cabbage patch kids) that end up fighting an evil cloud. It's like a Care Bear movie, just with more violence...

FFIV - You basically play as Michael Jackson. You start off black and end up white. You ruin young children's lives. You battle zombies, and the final battle takes place on the moon.

FFV - The first FF with an enviromental theme about not exploiting the limited resources of the planet... oh and you fight an evil tree...

FFVI - Can't sleep clown will eat me...

FFVII - The game that gave us "Shiny little golden string of hope" hopefully your girlfriend won't use it in reference to your...

FFX - The main character is a figment of your imagination, the heroine has the personality of interactive furniture, and the one guy is a zombie. Yes truly the most realistic cast of characters in an RPG...

FFX-2 - Put your hand in a blender and turn it on. Good, now know what playing this game feels like.

FFXI - The first step towards getting FF fans to interact with real people... oh who am I kidding. FF fans are the farthest thing from real people...

FFXII - The game that will make you think unholy thoughts about your sister's pet rabbit.

FFXIII - This is so original!!! It has trains going through post apolcalyptic locals, gunblades, and a chick who looks like Yuna... wait a minute...

Wow... I love you.:love:

Wolf Kanno

01-07-2007, 07:32 AM

You're welcome;)

Vincent, Thunder God

01-08-2007, 10:44 PM

FFIV - You basically play as Michael Jackson. You start off black and end up white. You ruin young children's lives. You battle zombies, and the final battle takes place on the moon.

All of your recent new ones were funny, but this has to be your best yet. :D

Wolf Kanno has still written the funniest IMO, but after re-reading the others I hereby appoint Darth Cid as the runner-up.

FFI: Saved the company, ruined your brain, any questions?

FFII: The Empire Strikes Back!

FFIII: The only game that gets a COMPLETE makeover!

FFIV: Become a terrorist delivering "packages", steal crystals, highjack airships, and destroy robotic giants. It's FF: GTA!

FFV: Play the pimp-vs-evil-tree verison of FFIII.

FFVI: This game had mobile suits called Magiteks, what kind of name is that?

FFVII: Spiky-haired dude with a big sword who appears to be on a period. Yes, this got the rest of the world interested in Final Fantasy.

FFVIII: A guy who appears to be on a worst period than the spiky-haired dude, what's with us and dudes on periods? Thought only girls get those.

FFIX: Finally, people who act their gender. Home of references and David Bowie lookalikes.

FFX: Ladies & Gentlemen Meg Ryan...I mean, Tidus.

FFX-2: To save Meg Ry-...Tidus, Yuna what any self-respecting lady would do, turn into a Lara Croft ripoff wearing less than half of what she wore one game ago, traveling around in an airship captained by her cousin who has a crush on her...that's the High Summoner Spira loves so much.

New Set

FFI: I hit all the black magic shops and I STILL can't find Hakoden.

FFII: We decided to parody The Westside Story, "I just fought alongside a girl named Maria!"

FFIII: The final boss is a cloud.

FFIV: The one where the main character goes from dark to light...like Michael Jackson.

FFV: The main character is named Butz?

FFVI: A clown takes over the world, I knew the circus was up to something damnit.

FFVII: It's four games after FFIII, and the main chacter is now named Cloud.

FFVIII: ...Whatever.

FFIX: The Matrix has you.

FFX: A guy who learns to wield a heavy sword in 0.67 seconds.

FFX-2: Save the world against a guy who looks like the guy who learns to wield a heavy sword in 0.67 seconds.