The never answered questions...

[Takara]

When a mommy summoned monster and a daddy summoned monster love each other very, very much, they go to the farm and pick a baby summoned monster together from the cabbage patch, and then the stork delivers it home. I thought everyone knew that!

Why aren't there any moogle in FFIV?

[Zeromus]

Cuz Edgar killed all them to make his clothes...

Why does Rydia don't want to be with Edge???

[Evastio]

She doesn't like his overconfident attitude.

Who was responsible for putting that unknown force in Baron Castle that stops Cecil from entering the 2nd Basement floor?

[Cezanzo]

Um...the king did, so no one would find his "secret place".:eek:

Someone can take my question!:D

[arcanedude34]

Porque es Rosa muy muy estupido?
(Why is Rosa very very stupid?)

[Zeromus]

I don't think she is stupid, cuz she can manage the great white spell "White"... (if u train her)... she have to has a powerful mind for that...
That one is maybe a personal appreciation more than a fact of the game... =/

Why almost all the people in the world looks like they were just the same person???
I mean, all the girls looks like the same girl, and so, all the boys too... All the black mages and the white mages, and the old man, and the kids... looks like they are just the same person...
Only the important people like our party and those in the power looks different... i would get confused talking to so much people who looks like just one...
http://www.videogamesprites.net/FinalFantasy4/NPCs/Townsfolk/Old%20Woman1%20(Left).gif http://www.videogamesprites.net/FinalFantasy4/NPCs/Townsfolk/Old%20Woman2%20(Left).gif http://www.videogamesprites.net/FinalFantasy4/NPCs/Townsfolk/Old%20Woman3%20(Left).gif

[Evastio]

The Lunarians used their advanced technology to clone the people on earth since there wasn't much of them.

How can Kain jump/Yang kick on Sword Rats without geting hurt?

[FuzZerd]

caluses on their feet. someone take my question.

[Dr. Acula]

How can I replace Palom with Vivi?

[Zeromus]

Making Vivi put a porn magazine with a rat trap... then when Palom falls, Vivi make a vudu ritual, then jump five times, prays 6 times to God Kefka, run with the running shoes 3 times around the world without finding ramdom battles, then make the Sword Dance with a Tonberi, and then, when Vivi randomly get to find a pink tail on the Tonberi lamp with the steal command with the sword dance, will get the Palom place...
Of Course, Vivi should have STR up to 69, and Magic less than 12, =S ...and u only can do it before Rydia casts Fire for first time xD...

Why is blue the default color of all the conversations of the game??? ...al people is so blue =(??? =S

[arcanedude34]

...what?

[Evastio]

The game developers did it so that they could gross out the dwarves with the colour blue.

Why are there no Flails in FFIV?

[Takara]

They used dead rats instead of spiky metal balls for their prototype. After the flail designers all died of the plague, no one on the Blue Planet mentionned flails again.

Besides Cecil (because he already did it), if all the cast got a class change after visiting Mt. Ordeal, what would their new job be?

[UltimateSpamGrover]

Since Tellah, Porom, and Palom are the only ones with Cecil at that point in the game...

Tellah - Red Mage
Porom - Summoner
Palom - Geomancer

-

Why does Cecil have purple hair in game but in Amano's art he's depicted in having white hair?

[KoShiatar]

Because Amano painted how he would be in the future.

Who are Palom and Porom's parents?

[Bunny]

Ivan Pavlov and a random Wizard lady.

Why does Golbez pick Kain?

[KoShiatar]

Because he thinks the grudge he holds against Cecil for stealing his girlfriend will make him easier to target.
That, and he's got a fancy for young blonde hot dragoons and their *spear*.

If there are dragoons, why there are no dragons to ride?

[Evastio]

They're either underground or on the moon. Dragoons didn't have access to those places (until Cecil and everyone made it possible to access them).

Do the Namingway people get paid?

[Takara]

Yes, but mentioning the method of the payment might get you arrested.

Why are Octomamm's eyes all freaky-like?

[Dr. Acula]

Because he thought putting soap in his eyes would make them look cleaner. Bad idea.

How can I kick Rosa and Edge outta my team in favor of Palom and Porom?

[KoShiatar]

Tell them "Look! I can see Rydia down there! And she's making out with Cecil!" They'll both run like there's no tomorrow.

Why is the Ant Lion's sprite so awfully ugly?

[Rabidewok]

Because he is just so ugly the people at square said lets just make everything about him ugly.

No question, someone take it

[Evastio]

Play the GBA Version of FFIV.

Why don't Hammers hurt as much as they should in FFIV?

[Zeromus]

It is Cid problem... he has his hand exhausted for something he was doing... so, can't use the hammers right...

why doesn't the evil/wicked mask guy have body???

[NINJA_Ryu]

they were sold out.

How DO airships work?

[KoShiatar]

They are propelled with Cid's farts.

Why don't Cecil and Golbeze look like each other at all?

[abrojtm]

How could you tell? You never see Golbeza.
(This is a question and an answer).

[arcanedude34]

Its a mystery...

Why does Kain tell Cecil to kill him if he turns evil again if Kain's so much stronger and Cecil would never be able to kill him?

[Gabranth]

so he can confirm that he really can kick cecil's ass all over the place.



how long did zeromus grow/not wash his hair to get those longass dreads?

[arcanedude34]

7507095640956340956439 years.

Someone take mine.

[Evastio]

How come it's so hard to run away from monsters in the Lunar Subterranean Core?

[KoShiatar]

That's because of a bizarre effect in Lunar gravity.

Is the moon really made of cheese?

[arcanedude34]

No, its processed yogurt.

If Cecil were a beaver, would he be a kick ass beaver?

[Evastio]

Yeah, but not as good a beaver as Gus in FFII.

Why aren't you allowed to run into the Tower of Bab-il in the Upper World with the airship?

[arcanedude34]

Cuz if you did, then everyone would have to kick your ass.

How come they're called Hummingways if they dont hum? (It sounds like they're choking on a piano >_<)

[NINJA_Ryu]

Because, the Mafia lords of Hummingsville blackmailed themselves into the game, under the disquise of Hummingways.

How is it possible to "use" up a tent? Understandably so for a cottage, but you can take down the tent and use it again, right?

[Evastio]

The Monsters are the ones "using it up". They vandalize it in the middle of the night.

How come you can only land on mountains, towns, castles, and lava for only half a second on the airship?

[arcanedude34]

The airship could stay there for all eternity if it wanted, but if the gang got out, they'd fall/rown instantly and you'd geta game over. The programmers just save you a lot of frustration.

Take mine.

[Evastio]

Who was the one responsible for making Evil Wall?

[FuzZerd]

the same person who made Mild Mannered Door


how did Zeromus manage to not wash his hair for 500473042730 times the age of the universe?

[Evastio]

There's no water in outer space.

How come Golbez takes way more damage from spells in the GBA Version?

[Gabranth]

it's all in the name: GBA Version = GolbezisaBitchAss Version.



do you think rosa likes the new good guy look for cecil, or does she yearn for the asshole black knight that he was?

[arcanedude34]

She would rather date Cecil in a tu-tu.

Is Kain emo?

[KoShiatar]

Sure thing. Or he wouldn't have that mane of hair, even if he hides it under a helmet. And unrequited love is uber-emo.

Who lays Mystery Eggs?

[arcanedude34]

Mystery Hens.

Take mine.

[UltimateSpamGrover]

What makes Final Fantasy IV, Final Fantasy IV?

[Dr. Acula]

The ultimately bad translation. It's definitely worse than the other FF's.

What's up with Edward wearing high heels?

[KoShiatar]

They actually contain amplifiers for the Twin Harp. That's why you can hear it from afar.

What would Rosa do if she saw Cecil at the girl's show in Troia?

[Evastio]

She'd probably be one of the girl's dancing at the show.

How come there's a Lilith Rod when Lilith's don't use rods?

[arcanedude34]

Because Lilith Dildo wouldn't make it in an E rated game.

Why is it that everyone can breathe on the moon?

[KoShiatar]

Because being the moon made of cheese, it manages to release oxygen somewhat (this doesn't make sense, like much of the rest of FF IV, so it fits perfectly.)

Are the Summones in the Land of Monsters Rydia's relatives? And if so, why is she so cute and they are so ugly?

[Evastio]

The summons are old friends of her ancestors but not actual relatives.

Speaking of the land of summoned monsters, where are Shiva, Ifrit, Ramuh, and Titan in the Summoned Monsters Town?

[(CECIL120X]

there two stories down parting....you know the background behind the background.

Why do the sprites almost always have one foot except Yang....wait lemme check.

[Evastio]

They hide their leg behind their other leg.

Why do they do that though?

[arcanedude34]

To hide the deforming scars they got in battle (thats where they get hit and thats why they dont end up w/ missing limbs etc.)

Why doesnt Cecil take everyone (PCs and all the armies) to the final confrontation so that I dont get my ass handed to me every time?

[Odaisé Gaelach]

Because the Lunar Whale has only one minibar. And Cecil has the key.

What does Rosa see in Cecil anyway?

[Evastio]

Rosa sees responsibility, determination, respectfulness, and a sense of righteousness in Cecil.

Why can't the Hovercraft be taken underground?

[Takara]

Because the underground is boring.

What exactly was the Pig Granny doing to Cecil's unconscious pig body while he was, well, unconscious?

[abrojtm]

Why can't the Hovercraft be taken underground?
It can. This also causes the Overworld Theme to play in the Underworld.

Pig Granny was heating up some oil to fry some pork rinds.

Why is the pass to the dancer's hall so expensive :(?

[The Mog Ninja]

cuz these modern day strippers r overpriced

and sum1 take my Q

[arcanedude34]

Why is there even a dancers' hall?

[Evastio]

It's Troia's way of making money.

How come there are evil bosses in FFIV that get healed from Holy power?

[Takara]

A. They used to be child-molesting priests.

Q. Why didn't Troia's prized all-female army do a single thing to prevent the Dark Elf from stealing the Earth Crystal?

[The Mog Ninja]

A. They were getting their nails done.

Someone take my question XD

[arcanedude34]

Why is there no castle that only talks about how stupid GIRLS are? I feel that's sexual-discrimination : (

[Evastio]

Damycian was in charge of that before it got bombed.

How come in the Baron Inn you're never able to tell the Innkeeper at the counter about the dancer in Baron even though there's a notice that tells you to inform him about talented dancers?

[Takara]

A. Because Kain said he'd kill everyone and their puppies in their sleep if they tried to get him hired as a Baronian Inn dancer again. Yes, it happened before. Yes, they were all drunk. Yes, Kain does indeed look ridiculous in a pink leotard.

Q. Was Anna mentally... er... challenged to fall for Edward, or did she just marry him because he's filthy rich, being a prince and all?

[arcanedude34]

Both.

Why doesn't this game have Sephiroth?

[Garnie]

the graphics could not compete with ps because of sehpys beautiful hair!

why cant Rydia use white magic after she gets older?

[arcanedude34]

She gets more selfish as she gets older and finds no need to heal people.

Take mine.

[Evastio]

What exactly happens when white chocobos try to fly?

[Gabranth]

they get a hernia.




how did rosa get that sickness near the beginning of the game?

[arcanedude34]

She ate at China Max and the food had bugs in it so she got violently sick and went into a coma. But due to China Max's threats to sue, Square changed it to "Desert Fever"

Why is Edge such a pimp?

[scrumpleberry]

Because he knew he had to set the prerequisite for the glorious pimps in the later games. (ie: edgar)

Somebody can take my question

[psyniac_123]

why cant Rydia use white magic after she gets older?



how did rosa get that sickness near the beginning of the game?

How come people keep asking the same questions from earlier in the thread?

[Takara]

A. They're like the various NPCs in the game; they don't mind repeating the same stuff again and again.

Q. What makes Rydia so green?

[qwertysaur]

she ate rosa's cooking

why does zeromus look like spagetti?

[darksword12]

I'll anwer with a comparison thingy:

Satan is to God as Zeromus is to the Flying Spaghetti Monster.

Can Golbez use white magic?

[Dragonface]

He try to learn white magic but keep on getting F everytime hes in the white magic class.

Someone take mine.

[Edge7]

So if Palom, Porom and Rydia are out, that could only leave...
...Edge. He would definitely do it.

I'm offended
Anyway, what does Edge do during his free time?

[qwertysaur]

Stares at Rydia fanfiction all day.

What does golbez look like under all that armour?

[darksword12]

Very much like Cecil, but with a few changes, e.g., hair &/or eye color, perhaps?

How do the dwarves know about the Big Whale?

[Takara]

They learned about it on the Discovery Channel.

What do Golbez and FuSoYa think about all the incestuous yaoi jokes?

[Fazin]

who you think invented the yaoi jokes =)

Why didn't the black chocobo cross the road?

[Hazzard]

Because he didn't like my face. :cry:

What did Cecil really get up to, when he was in that tent with Tellah and the young Rydia?

[Takara]

Cutting his toenails, of course.

What would happen to Cecil, Edge, and Kain if both Rydia and Rosa were PMSing at the same time?

[Hexarar]

They would get their erm butts kicked big time by two really PO'd women, accompanied with an explanation "Stop being annoying and asking all those stupid questions and all such crap I can up to to explain just why am I so pissed at you!" (That's what my sisters sound like... well, to think it again, they sound like that all the time).
Sorry my inglese.

How long did it take to Yang to grow that hairdo? And just why did he bother?

[arcanedude34]

It took him a few minutes and he just wanted to look like Jackie Chan before he realized thats not what's Jackie Chan's hairstyle looks like. He was looking for the Ancient Mystic Razor to shave his head to grow new hair when you met him. (This would make a good sequel to FFIV-

Jackie Chan's Apprentice: Search for the Ancient Mystic Razor ^^; )

Why is Golbez not named SurlyStrawHatManWhoPlaysTheBanjoWithHisTeeth?

[Takara]

Character limits, of course. That, and his mother thought that was too weird a name to give a baby, even if in Lunarian it meant "He Who Will Become Master of the BushHags". And we all know BushHags are the awesomest creatures in FFIV's universe, so that would have made Golbez doubly awesome.

Where in Damcyan do they hide all the cheese?

[Evastio]

In the Damycian desert.

What is all that blue stuff in the background during the final battle?

[FuzZerd]

its quite simple really, you see the amazing power of zeromus combined with the power of the crystal plus the total awesomeness of your party, triangulated with cids super cool beard and yangs unbelieveable ability to survive massive explosions cause a rift in the space-time-continuim causing the enter moon to travel back in time a few billion years when the universe was closer together and all the stars were young.

ahem! sorry the short answer is they're bright galexys (excuse my spelling)

I don't have a question.

[qwertysaur]

well the awnser to your statement is cid's beard.

Why do Porom and Palom look so similar?

[arcanedude34]

THEY'RE THE SAME PERSON. Every once in a while, the boy (forgot which is which) cresses in drag and calls himself a girls' name, but since he isn't original, he winds up just switching a few letters. Since he was trained as a ninja-type red mage person, he can change clothes, and move from place to place in the blink of an eye, so it seems there are two twins.

No, the real mystery would be how he can be dead for one role, yet alive for the other. And how can he switch his stats around all the time? (BTW those two are my questions)

[Takara]

To answer your questions, it's still due to the awesome power of Cid's beard, of course.

What would happen if you'd bred a chocobo with MomBomb?

[Avarice-ness]

You'd get a meal for a small town and the oddest breeding process ever
Pass the BBQ sauce, we're gonna be eating good tonight!

Even with shoulder armor that can gogue a persons eyes out, Why -is- Rosa so helpless?

[arcanedude34]

Can Edward play the guitar? Does he know all about virtuosos, arpeggios, trembalos... well, can he do it all? Can he play your basic rhythm guitar, like "jug jigga jug jigga jug jigga jug jigga jug jigga JAH JAH, jiggidy jug jigga jug jigga jug jigga jug jigga jug jigga JAH JAAH!"? You know, something like that? Can he also play some pretty hott lixx, too? You know the kind that are just way up high on the tiny strings and you mash your fingers on 'em like "Meedley meedley meedley meedley meedley meedley meedley meedley meedley meedley meedley meedley MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"? Does Cid come in on his bass? Is he like "dou dow da dou da da DOU da dou da dou dou!"? Then does Palom come in on his keyboard like "boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boo!"? And is Edward subsequently like "And the dragon comes in the NIIIiiiiIIIiiiiIIIIIIIIiiiiiiiiiiiIIIIIIIIiiiIIGGHHT!"?

Holy crap, I just realized where that's from. Fudge, I'm so slow.

Anyway, she was given steroids to enhance her strength, but someone switched it with Ritalin to be an ass. Since the stereotypical female lead had the brain capacity of a seven year old at the time, she became extremely calm all the time, and therefore isn't as usefull in battle (or bed for that matter)

Why isn't there a fork, plate, glass and knife to throw at foes as well as a spoon?

[Takara]

The BushHags stole them all.

Why weren't there as many rumours about bringing Tellah back to life as rumours about bringing General Leo or Aeris back to life?

[Avarice-ness]

Because most people are either FFVI fan kids or FFVII fan kids, half of us even deny Tellahs death, speaking of denying tellah's death.

Why wasn't Tellah important enough to be recognized as the first dead FF main chara?

[FuzZerd]

obviously because he didn't die, besides what about almost every player charecter from final fantasy 2j don't they get to be counted as the first ff main charecter to die?

that being said, why might casting a spell kill you, and what exactly happened to him when he did cast the spell?

[Evastio]

The magic power of Meteor that he summoned up was too much for him and it overwhelmed him.

How come you can't throw characters at enemies like in FFVI?

[Takara]

Because Edge is a wimp.

What would a Lamia, a Pink Puff, a Zu, and Ogopogo talk about if they could meet?

[Edge7]

Jellybeans
Somebody take mine

[Klaz]

Why does Cid have to throw himself with a bomb from the airship when he could just throw the bomb?

[FuzZerd]

he was really depressed. someone take mine

[Klaz]

Why are there no Red Mages on FFIV?

[darksword12]

Because Square's deliberately trying to tick me off.

Is there a Lunar Chocobo boss in the gameboy advance version?

[Goldenboko]

No but you can ride on Cid's Beard.

So how awesome is Cid's Beard?

[FuzZerd]

7,



on a scale from 1-5.

someone take mine.

[Evastio]

How come Cid never uses a pickaxe?

[arcanedude34]

Pickaxes would make his beardseem less cool, which would practically be a hate crime.

What's the point of having yellow chocobos and black chocobos in the the same forest when nobody in their right mind would choose yellow over black?

[(CECIL120X]

the game makers were color blind

when that big huge giant appeared why didnt the whole party just get out of the airships and become their overworld giant selves so they can kick its mechanical ass

[Takara]

Cid, as awesome as his beard is, forgot to bring the devices that activate the mechas. Rumours say they're actually Gundams, and Edge's is pink and purple.

Why is Silveira/Mythril Town such a crappy place?

[arcanedude34]

They invested heavily in corn. During the corn scare of '89, their entire stock market crashed. They haven't recovered yet. Poor souls.

What were the four fiends doing in the giant?

[scrumpleberry]

Listening to a Cher CD. Thats why they wanted to kill Cecil and co; so that they couldn't tell anyone...

What was Astos doing in the evil anti metal cave?

[Takara]

Trying to prove to his fellow Dark Elves that he was a real manly man. Obviously, that didn't go well after he got his ass kicked because of a pretty boy with a harp.

Why are the guardswomen of Troia dressed like dancers?

[Evastio]

There's no mines nearby Trioa that they could use to craft metal armor for their guards.

How come Airships and the Whale are allowed to land on water for a split second while Hovercrafts can't?

[arcanedude34]

The hovercraft is afraid of water.

Why are Leviathan, Bahumut, and Odin all such pushovers, while Asura is wicked strong?

[Dragonface]

Leviathan, Bahumut, and Odin are acting that way because they try to get away from their fans from the past FFs. And for Bahumut, being apear in the first FF, was the one who ran away and live in the moon.

Why can't the FFIV crew get a Blue mage?

[Evastio]

The Red Wings killed them all while they were under the fake King Baron's command.

Why can't Edge throw Cecil's Dark Swords?

[Takara]

He's a pansy. Besides, it wouldn't impress Rydia.

Do all Lunarians look like mops when they get K.O.ed?

[scrumpleberry]

He's a pansy. Besides, it wouldn't impress Rydia.

Do all Lunarians look like mops when they get K.O.ed?

Yes. It is a defensive tactic to make the monsters think they are cute and not devour their unconcious bodies.

Why do Cecil and Rosa morph into one sprite when they kiss?

[arcanedude34]

The radiation give off of the second moon causes their bodies to mutate together when they get too close. Thats why, even when two characters are like, holding hands or something, they still stay a foot away from each other. Cecil and Rosa are just stupid. No word on how babies are made. Oo

Why can't Kain be the main character?

[Evastio]

Because he's under mind control for a large portion of the game.

How does Dark Elf's whisper turn you into a Pig?

[Takara]

He's whispering naughty things, that's how.

What's the point of giving Lunar Bahamut this name when his counterpart also lives on the Red Moon?

[darksword12]

Lunar Bahamut was on the moon already when Bahamut moved there.

In the original translation, the Masamune was referred to as a "blade of black." If so, could Dark Knight Cecil potentially equip it?

What about the Genji Armor?

[seein2stars]

No, because the sword is based from japan and only a ninja could yield it.
What about the armor?


Why can't Cecil be beserked late in the game. Like towards Zeromus.

Sorry another.

Why doesn't dispel work on the Evil Mask?

[arcanedude34]

One at a time. I'll answer your first. Cecil is too holy-based to go psycho later.

Someone take mine.

[Dragonface]

What happen when the FFIV crew starts playing othe Final Fantasy Games?

[Takara]

They make fun of Cloud, Sephiroth, Squall, and all the other pathetic characters in all the post-FFVII games.

How old is FuSoYa, exactly?

[arcanedude34]

So old he lost count.

What happened to Rydia's dad? The game mentions her mom, but not her dad.

[(CECIL120X]

her mom is a hermapfrodite

when do the characters go to the bathroom

[arcanedude34]

All the time. Like, seriously, they are constantly crapping and pissing themselves.

Is this thread too dead to be revived?

[KoShiatar]

No, of course.

What's under Edge's scarf?

[fire_of_avalon]

Edge's darkest, deepest secret.

He has a really pretty mouth.

How exactly did Cecil's mama make it with a dragon?

EDIT: Just to be clear, I stand firmly by the idea that the Mysidian Legend means KluYa was a dragon AND THERE'S NO WAY I WILL CHANGE MY MIND. I've been convinced of this since I was six!

[Evastio]

Edge's darkest, deepest secret.

He has a really pretty mouth.

How exactly did Cecil's mama make it with a dragon?

EDIT: Just to be clear, I stand firmly by the idea that the Mysidian Legend means KluYa was a dragon AND THERE'S NO WAY I WILL CHANGE MY MIND. I've been convinced of this since I was six!
KluYa wasn't a dragon. The one that they talk about in the legend is the Lunar Whale. That's why the legend was shown before the Lunar Whale appeared.

If you're still convinced about that I guess I'll say that KluYa wasn't that big of a dragon so it made it possible.

Why can't you control any sea based transportation in FFIV? You could in the first 3 FFs.

[Takara]

Cecil gets seasick.

Why is Tellah wearing pink?

[Selena_Akariko]

Uh... Because his daughter made that robe for him, and you know girls like pink...

My question: we all know that the moon affects tides and stuff. Weren't there supposed to be a flood or something after the second moon flew away?

:save: Selena

[NeoCracker]

Cheese, contrary to popular belief, has not Gravitational Pull.

If FF IV had a Sitcom, what would it be called other than Ah! The Power of Cheese?

[Dragonface]

Final Dimwits VI.

Why does Japan people spell 'Cain' wrong?

[Elite Lord Sigma]

Because that's how Japan is.

How many people would mug Edward for his hat?

[Evastio]

Edge and Tellah would. The rest of the people that would want his hat are Baronians.

Who is responsible for the "unknown force" that prevents Cecil from going to Baron's secondary throne?

[Takara]

No one, unless you count Cid's body odor as a sentient being.

Why is Rydia the only green-haired person in the entire world of FFIV?

[Selena_Akariko]

She's the only one who knows how to make green hairdye.

Why is Rosa considered Baron's beauty if she has such an ugly face-portrait? (the nose >_<)

[Takara]

Baronians obviously have low standards for beauty.

How could all the mighty monks of Fabul, with the exception of Yang, lose to MomBomb?

[Masamunemaster]

They heard mom and forgot to pick them up from the nursing home

Why does Rydia remind me of a lawn gnome

[ReloadPsi]

It's the beard.

Is that true!*



*That was my question in case you thought I was forgetting to write one; remember the dude on the ship from Fabul?

[Takara]

Truly!? (Yes, that's my answer. Now I want to read Ah! The Power of Cheese again.)

Did Cecil's armour rust after that bath in the water of Troia, like the naked chick in the water said?

[Dragonface]

His Armor was made NOT to get rusted by water, its mud that makes it rust.

If FFIV crew has the power to help ONE other FF games, which will they go and help (DO NOT SAY FF IV)?

[Evastio]

They'd help the FFVI crew because they also face a hateful enemy.

What's with the black stuff that surrounds the Tower of Bab-il on the Upper World?

[KoShiatar]

That's smoke coming from dwarven hookas. All dwarves smoke hooka, it's a known fact, but it was edited out of the game because children played it.

Who is responsible for Tellah's questionable hairstyle?

[arcanedude34]

His hairstyle is the effect of a gravity spell gone HORRIBLY wrong.

Why are there so many crystals in this game?

[Evastio]

There are both Light Crystals and Dark Crystals for each of the 4 elements. The other FFs didn't have that.

Why don't White Chocobos restore MP in any other FF?

[Takara]

Because they got lazy.

If Yang's pants have little smiley faces printed on them, what are on his bowers?

[KoShiatar]

They have "kiss the future" written on the front and "smurf the past" on the back.

How did Yang marry such a virago?

[Evastio]

All the other women in Fabul were White Mages which he didn't like.

Why aren't there Red Mages in FFIV?

[Takara]

There aren't any red mages because they're actually called "sages". Blame Tellah. He whined so much about how "red mage" was a lame name for his class that after the new name was accepted, the other red mages-- I mean, sages, kicked him out of Mysidia.

Did Zemus have hair before?

[KoShiatar]

Yes he did, but it all fell because of the stress. Being evil is not as relaxing as you'd think.

What do the Pink Puffs smell like?

[abrojtm]

Tuna.

How do those crazy summon creatures get out from the Underworld when you summon them?

[Takara]

They take a cab.

If Bahamut's cave was on the Red Moon, does it mean Rydia will no longer be able to summon him after it leaves the Blue Planet's orbit?

[scrumpleberry]

Nah, Rydia's awesome, she can summon anything from anywhere.

Do Namingways have nothing better to do than hum and name people all day? Are they really...SECRET AGENTS?

[KoShiatar]

Yes, they were agents from the false king of Baron in charge of spying Cecil's moves everywhere he went, but after he was defeated they retired and went to the Moon to live their old age in peace.

Why do BushHags wear a hood?

[Dragonface]

Its all they got to cover their ears from a 'singing cry baby bard' (due to the Hags never learn his name).

Is there any air on the moon???

[Takara]

Yes. It smells like old cheese and dirty socks, though.

Do a Lunarian's dirty socks glow in the dark?

[Lawr]

Only when they take their annual Uranium baths.
---
Why is Kain blonde?

[FuzZerd]

hes an albino, this is also why he never takes off his armor (he'd sunburn really quickly)

whats this dubbingway guy I've been hearing about do.

[KoShiatar]

He gives you subtitles for FF II US's poor translation.

What does the weirdo man in the Adamantium Cave do with all the animal tails?

[scrumpleberry]

God you do not want to know. It's disgusting. He actually...it makes me feel sick...he...he...

He peforms transplants on disabled animals in order to help them have a better life!

Ugh.

Anyway, how come the preferred guise of Leviathan is a wrinkly old man? And don't say BECAUSE THINGS ARE NOT ALWAYS AS THEY SEEM OHOHOHO because that's just what he wants you to think.

[Takara]

Well, he wanted to take the guise of a hot chick in a blue dress, but Asura beat him to it, and the wrinkly old man was the only one left.

When a Troian woman gives birth to a baby boy after a one night stand with a traveler in the "Pub", what does she do?

[abrojtm]

Sunbathes, of course.

Why are the dwarves constantly bombing the tower of Babil before you go in there?

[Lenneth]

Because Golbez stole the dwarves' muffins when he sent his dolls there.

How does Baron manage to brainwash Yang?

[Heath]

Suggestive clothing, a drunken bet and eleven secret herbs and spices.

How would the people of Eblan decorate their caves if they couldn't go back to their castle?

[Dragonface]

If they try to hang something (eg a photo), they're get caved in!

If theres a Yang, then wheres a Yin?

[leader of mortals]

yangs wife is yin in disguise

if tellah hadn't died, where would he be

[Takara]

In the basement of the "Pub" in Troia. And then he'd tell the other lecherous old men there: "IM IN UR PUB, CHECKIN UR HOTTIEZ!"

Not counting Gilbert/Edward, if the characters were magically transported to 21st century Earth, which one would be the best Guitar Hero player?

[KoShiatar]

Cecil. He's no guitar, but he sure is a hero.

Does Rydia carry a whip to keep Edge off of her or what?

[Evastio]

She started using whips ever since the people in the Land of Summoned Monsters gave her one.

How can Kain Jump on Sword Rats without getting injured?

[Takara]

Armor, duh. Although other theorize that his hair grant him some awesome powers.

Why does Eblana Castle have the same music as Damcyan Castle while all the other castles in the game have their own theme?

[f f freak]

Because, much like FF6 and Figaro Castle, Damcyan/Eblan Castle can move between the two locations, so they are actually the same Castle, just in a different region so they had to give it a different name.

If Rosa and Rydia had a child that turned out to be Cecil, who was in fact Golbez's father who is Kain's Auntie who is Edge's Mother and Father, yet Rosa and Rydia never met, how did all of this happen?

[Heath]

A wizard (read: Tellah) did it.

Would FFIV have been even more awesome if Tellah was the main character? Why?

[Takara]

I don't know. I guess the main character dying in the middle of the game would have created some interesting reactions in the fandom. And we would have gotten a lot more old people rants about feet being cold, then feet being warm, then feet smelling, then kids dressing up strange, then a large amounts of "in the good old days" anecdotes... And he would have told everyone that when he was young, they didn't have such things as airships, hovercrafts, chocobos and Serpent/Devil Roads. Adventurers had to walk everywhere (yes, even walking ACROSS oceans, because there was also no such things as swimming and boats), barefoot, in ten feet on snow. And no matter where they went, it was always uphill, in all directions.

If Tellah and FuSoYa had met in game, what would have happened?

[KoShiatar]

They would have held a contest to see who was more deserving to be dubbed old fart.

What if the FFIV cast read "Ah, the Power of Cheese!" (http://demented3d.com/ffiv)?

[Evastio]

Zemus would interrupt the FFIV cast while they're reading it saying "You the heroic humans reading it does not offend me you fools!!"

Why didn't Asura or the Mist Dragon appear in any of the other FFs as summons?

[KoShiatar]

Because the Mist Dragon was Rydia's mom's personal dragon, and it was passed down in her family from mother to daughter forever since. As for Ashura, she went on to do pageants and has't stopped to this day.

Why are there Dragoons if they don't ride dragons, but they kill them?

[Heath]

They were on holiday. It was a trade union thing, the programmers tried their best to try and get them into the game, but they just weren't having it unless they paid them double. Greedy dragons.

When Porom and Palom are unpetrified, why didn't the walls resume moving and crush them?

[arcanedude34]

Because then FFIV would be TOO awesome.

Why didn't Palom and Porom just cast stop on the walls instead of stone on themselves?

[scrumpleberry]

It's a prerequisite that to be a minor FFIV character you need to die heroically at least once.

Either that or, CUT THEM SOME SLACK, THEY'RE FREAKING FIVE.

Do you think Rosa knew she was dooming herself to endless kidnappings as the LOVE INTEREST?

[*PaladinCecil*]

As the love interest, I think Rosa was amazed that she only got kidnapped once, and only because she had no choice but to let herself get kidnapped if Cecil were to live for another day.

Why did Rydia wait until Cecil and the others were about to die before she jumped in with a summoning of her Mist Dragon?

[KoShiatar]

Because she wanted to look badass, of course.

Do Palom and Porom pick their noses?

[f f freak]

No. They pick Tellah's noses (Note, Tellah has more then one nose)

Is Golbez actually Rosa's father?

[Evastio]

No. Rosa's father was a Baronian Knight.

Why does the Troian who guards the treasures call you honest after saying you don't have permission to get the treasures when you actually do in the GBA Version?

[arcanedude34]

Cuz he doesn't want to share his treasure.

How does Rydia learn the dragon summon if Kain and Cecil killed it?

[KoShiatar]

Ancestral memories.

What does a CPU do in a mostly fantasy world?

[Takara]

Nothing. It just waits until someone activates the giant, or allows Golbez to play Solitaire when he's bored. Some debate Edge might have used it for porn-finding purposes if he knew about it before it was destroyed.

Speaking of the CPU, how technologically-advanced were those Lunarians?

[arcanedude34]

They live in caves. Not very.

Does Kain listen to emo music?

[Evastio]

It depends on whether you consider any of the songs in FFIV emo or not.

Besides the game developers not wanting people to use Meteor, is there any reason why they made Tellah's MP always stay at 90?

[KoShiatar]

To show how Tella's magical capabilities were smaller than his ego.

Why do dead people just disappear? Is burial never used in the FF IV world? And where do they go?

[starboyK]

The rate of decay on FF worlds is vastly greater than that in the rest of the known universe due to the gargantuan microbes that crawl around everywhere, so burial is unnecessary. They end up in the gigantic bacteria bodies... a.k.a. the farplane.


Do you think that Cecil & Edge lived happily ever after with Rosa & Rydia, or do you think that ten years later there was a room full of lawyers that were debating the conditions of the prenuptial agreements?

[Takara]

Cecil and Rosa live happily ever after and have about eight kids. Rydia is currently spending time in the prisons of Eblana for torching Edge to death with a Firaga spell the first time she visited. Her lawyer wanted to go with the SPM defense. Rydia plead guilty, claiming "the little snot was asking for it".

So, who's ruling Eblana now that Rydia torched Edge to death with a Firaga spell? :radred:

[GreenBanana]

Probably that goofy old prude that kept getting frustrated with Edge's interminable spooniness ("to spoon" is 50s for "making out", which is why Gilbert is a "spoony" bard for trying to make it with Tellah's daughter, incidentally. But who can blame Tellah's daughter when Gilbert is the FFIV version of a rock star?). Things are actually getting done now, interestingly enough. Rydia of course will be let off on reduced charges and plea bargaining. Bahamut makes a better pet for her anyway.

Just to clarify, I'm pretty sure there's this chancellor that hops around during the ending cutscene while Edge just faps on his throne to thoughts of Rydia and her summons.

How much DOES a Namingway? (Get it? How much does it weigh?)

[Evastio]

As much renaming as you ask him to.

How come the invisible switches in black halls from FFIII were removed in FFIV?

[GreenBanana]

Because when the time came to bring them over from FFIII nobody could find them. They say there are old staff members stuck in those bloody walls. That explains much of the supernatural phenomena that goes on almost on a daily basis at Square Studios. Random battles are actually attributed to the ghosts of the damned who are unable to pass on from this world into the next.

Mommy, what does it mean when Cecil is on a tile and Rosa is on the same tile and they are hugging like that??????

[Takara]

Why, they're inspecting each other's tonsils to make sure neither of them are sick, child. That's also the first step to make babies, generally. Sometime later, the stork brings the newly-made baby, and then Edge barbecues the stork with his awesome power of anger.

Why are white mages unable to use mallets in FFIV like in FFI?

[GreenBanana]

Cid's Beard took them all away, because it enjoys the awesomeness of the noise "PAMF PAMF" that the hammers make. That and Rosa can't Aim with a Hammer to save her life.

Is Lord Zemus actually a misspelling/misread/mistranslation of the name Lord Xenu?

[*PaladinCecil*]

No, because the Church of Scientology would have sued Squaresoft into bankruptcy for using a Scientology term in the game without making the protagonist L. Ron Hubbard or making explicit mention of the "wonders" of their group.

What would Rosa do for a Klondike bar?

[KoShiatar]

Finish Guitar Hero III on Hard mode.

Are the Pink Puffs made of strawberry chewing gum?

[Gnostic Yevon]

Finish Guitar Hero III on Hard mode.

Are the Pink Puffs made of strawberry chewing gum?

No. That's only an urban legend. They are actually made of Cherry Pie Filling.

Why do Moogles Dance?

[Evastio]

That question is hardly FFIV related seeing as how there's no moogles in FFIV. I'll answer it anyways. They conjure up special powers whenver they dance inducing magic effects that can be helpful or harmful.

Why doesn't the Coctric (FFII SNES Translation of Cocatrice) Summon work in the SNES American Version?

[GreenBanana]

Because status-affecting skills are notorious for never working in RPGs ever. They make the game too easy if enemies catch them, as they're mainly just inserted to be obstacles to the player characters, which would imply that they make the game too hard or that the difference in difficulty is too steep.

Why don't they reference characters' full names in North America? I never knew Cecil's full name was "Cecil Harvey" before. Man, what a great name.

[Heath]

Because them folks over there across the pond in the US of A are a lot more informal and familiar.

Why do the extremely powerful summons hide away so deep underground?

[sub zero]

they are ariphobic (wrong i know it supposed to be scared of open spaces)

why are antlions evil?

[KoShiatar]

Because heroes in search of the Desert Light came so often that they got pissed off.

Why doesn't Rosa wear a regular White Mage hood?

[Selena_Akariko]

Because nobody will see her beautiful blonde hair, duh!

Why does Edward (Gilbert) look so girly?

[KoShiatar]

Because he was planning to have a sex change and taking female hormones but then he met Anna and changed his mind.


Are Rydia's eyes blue or green??

[Takara]

Blue. No, green. No, blue! ... GREEN! Arg, I don't know! Let's just say they're blue-green, mkay?

Do Dragoons all have smelly boots?

[GreenBanana]

No. In fact, you might say that none of them do.

What do you suppose Cecil and Rosa named their kids?

[Selena_Akariko]

Well, they will end up argueing because there's so many friends they could name them after, and in the end, the poor kids will just end up with names "Boy" and "Girl".

Why didn't Square want to make more FMVs in the DS remake and show us more charachter (especially Rydia) hotness? T_T

[KoShiatar]

Because we would have all gone crazy so hot they were.

Who are Palom and Porom's parents?

[starboyK]

The Mysidian Elder's daughter, sadly deceased, and KluYa (yeah, he got around.)

Do you think that Cecil ever faced an assassination plot after the twins discovered that they were next in line for the throne??

[KoShiatar]

Nay. The twins liked too much being little marauders to face the responsabilities of the throne. Besides, they liked Cecil after all.

Does FuSoYa have any children?

[NeoCracker]

Rosa, Rydia, Edward, Telluh, Yang, King of Fabul, the Real King of Baron, Leviathan, Bahamut, that little kid who thinks Dark Nights are cool, the astronomers from that one city before the Dark Elf, the Dwarf King, and a random Ninja.

And you thought Kluya got around.


Does the FF IV cast believe in the Engrish Santa?

[Takara]

No, they don't even have an holiday called Christmas. They're safe, for now.

Why won't Square-Enix give me CGs of Cid, FuSoYa, and Tellah? :(

[Masamunemaster]

because cid
\\
/ \
fusoya-tellah

[GreenBanana]

Was that a pass on a question? Was that even an answer? What's a CG supposed to be? Guess someone has to fix things...

There are no "CGs" of Cid/Tellah/FuSoYa because they don't have that "silver fox" appeal.

Are Cecil and KluYa related to Kal-El and Jor-El by any chance? The whole "space parents origin lineage" thingy, I mean.

[Takara]

Of course! They're cousins twice removed on KluYa's mother's side.

Edge: boxers or briefs?

[Heath]

Briefs. He thinks he's got style but... well...

Ashura vs. Rydia. Who'd win?

[GreenBanana]

Rydia did win, remember? Rydia kicked her four freak faces good.

What the hell is Zeromus supposed to look like? I can't wait until FFIVDS comes out to figure THAT one out.

[Takara]

Which one? The form when he first appears, or the form after Cecil uses the crystal on him? In the first form, he's obviously a blue dust bunny that became a sentient being and mutated into something ugly after being stuck for 10 years under FuSoYa's robes. As for the second form? He's a mutated blue dust bunny from the inside out. *nods*

Speaking of FuSoYa, what's up with his long, gravity-defying eyebrows?

[Evastio]

He's suppose to look like an undead insect/dinosaur/bat thing that looks completely hideous yet cool.

If Cids were a unit of measurement, would Rubicant really be eight Cids tall in real life? Why/why not?

[GreenBanana]

Well, maybe not EIGHT Cids tall, but Rubicante definitely would be abnormally tall. Why? Aside from the fact he's evil (though he seemed real nice about that), Rubicante was star of the Mysidian Chocobos back in his college years. The fact he got left out of Mario 3-on-3 Basketball was a bit of a disappointment to his fans (unless of course he's actually in there--I never played it much myself).

What do you think is considered "high cuisine" in the world of Final Fantasy IV? Braised boa over minced baby leek? Or?

[*PaladinCecil*]

I just feel like I have to say something to one of the earlier things said, for the Ashura vs. Rydia one.

"Rydia did win, remember? Rydia kicked her four freak faces good."

No she didn't. The question was about Ashura versus Rydia one-on-one. The battle with Ashura in the game had Ashura versus a five-person party that included Rydia.

[Evastio]

Braised boa is where it's at. Right beside sword rat on a stick.

What's with Tokita acting like he's joining your team? Why doesn't he actually join it?

[Takara]

Because he's having second thoughts after he joins you, and decides not to join because he's a coward and FuSoYa scares him.

Speaking of FuSoYa, again, since Evastio missed my question after we answered the same one almost simultaneously... What's up with FuSoYa's long, gravity-defying eyebrows?

[GreenBanana]

FuSoYa's eyebrows... are FALSIES!? And he left them in his pocket when he starched his robe. Or else they're his Lunarian antennae, which is silly, because everybody knows Lunarians don't have antennae; Martians do.

If you play FFIV backwards, does it say "Tellah is dead"?

[arcanedude34]

No, playing FFIV backwards says Cecil and Rosa get a divorce, Rydia goes through puberty backwards, and Kain's inner struggle becomes whimsically undecipherable.

Why is it that Cecil didn't finish off the many many wounded, near-death soldiers he came across in Damycan to save them from the agony of living a half-life just long enough to die a horrible gruesome death, half-caused by blood loss, half-caused by starvation?

[Relapse]

Because if he didn't, Rosa would break up with him, Edward would call him a meanie, Rydia would run off terrified and Tellah would call him a spoony dark knight, thus causing a mental breakdown which eventually leads to him being gay with Kain, and eventually, the end of the world.

Why is Valvalis the only woman-fiend?

[Evastio]

There wasn't any other women out there who wanted to live in freezing water, have rotten flesh, or have burnt up skin.

(Please assume fire can talk for this question next poster) Why does the fireplace in towns say ouch whenever you talk to it?

[GreenBanana]

Because fire is very sensitive, of course. That's why it flickers about so much; it's nervous about being touched.

What's going on in the cutscene after you defeat the CPU in the Giant of Bab-il in the DS version of FFIV? Actually, the answer to that might contain spoilers... even though I'm dying to know.

Where did the characters from FFIV hang out in between filming scenes in the game?

[Relapse]

At Lufia, Fynn, Kefka's house and Midgar.

What IS FFIV anyway?

[GreenBanana]

The abbreviation for "Final Fantasy 4".

What do you suppose are some of the main cast's interests outside of saving the planet and fighting evil badguys and the like?

[Takara]

Cecil is a hand model, earning millions of Gils due to his pretty manicured nails. Rosa is part of a black market ring selling Troian weed to teens of the Blue Planet. Rydia has her own BDSM place. Edge is actually volunteering at his local Salvation Army to feed the orphans. Kain spends too much time doing his hair; he buys shampoo and conditioner by the crate nowadays. Gilbert is actually the lead guitarist of some punk band in Kaipo; his nipple piercings and tight leather pants drive the ladies insane! Cid just sleeps all day and buys little boats to do boat races in Baron. Yang is writing self-help booklets for abused husbands. Palom and Porom fight crime in Mysidia, shoujo manga-style, when they're not studying. Tellah just rots. FuSoYa enjoys rolling on the floors of the Lunar Palace to keep them clean.

Why is the dancer in Baron such a hussy?

[Sir Lancealot]

She was meant to go to Troia, but Cid, being old, misheard, and took her to Baron.

Can a five ounce Black Chocobo carry a 1 pound bomb?
(See if you can guess the movie reference.)

[Evastio]

It could but its flying abilities would be hindered so much that it might as well run with the bomb instead of fly.

Why do Pink Puffs have defenses that are a lot lower compared to other slimes?

[Selena_Akariko]

Because they're pink and puffy, duh!

What will Edge do if he can't get Rydia to like him?

[GreenBanana]

As off-color as it may seem, there's always drinking and porno. He'll probably ride his fame as a famous ninja, eventually learn to be humble, yet continue his flings with numerous ladies without ever feeling satisfied, become real disappointed/depressed when Rydia meets up with someone more right for her, until he meets some ninja princess with super kung fu skills whom he didn't expect to fall in love with and then live comfortably ever after.

Uh, but for those who think Rydia and Edge get together, I'd imagine they'd turn out much like Yang and his wife, only with Edge being real irresponsible compared to Yang, of course. Comic foibles ensue and we are taught to laugh at love again. Pick either scenario you want. Personally I think the latter one is a lot more light-hearted.

What EXACTLY did Kain do after Rydia first summoned Titan at him and Cecil causing a huge destructive earthquake? Did he wander around confused until Golbez found him, did he wander back to Baron on his own and become brainwashed/assimilated that way, or did Baronian guards send to spy on Cecil and Kain find him and escort him home?

In fact, I want to change my question to this instead: What transpired while Cecil and Kain were sent off to unknowingly destroy the village of Mist, until at least Cecil met up with Tellah? What we can probably assume is Rosa and some Baronian guards were somehow able to trace Cecil to Kaipo (maybe it was just chance Rosa was taken in there after contracting desert fever?), and Golbez gained power in Baron without Cecil having met him yet.

Well, maybe one could have a more elaborate discussion on what was going on then and before the game's events began, but feel free to answer however you like as according to this thread.

[Evastio]

Rosa fell off Baron Castle over the mountains into the Kaipo desert after she heard the news. The Baronian Guards followed her (jumping off Baron Castle into the Kaipo desert) and spied on her thinking she'd lead them to Cecil. A traveller found her and brought her to Kaipo and the soldiers followed the two of them there.

Why isn't the Piggy status in any other FF?

[GreenBanana]

Pigs went extinct, sorry. Plus, they weren't as cute as the froggies.

What kinds of regional dialects and accents do you suppose the various locations and peoples of the FFIV world have?

[Relapse]

Well, probably Math and Science.

Why does Cecil have white hair?

[scrumpleberry]

Cause he's half lunar person?

How exactly can Gilward split a potion?

[Evastio]

He uses harpblades. The strings are actually really sharp and can cut through glass and plastic.

Why can't anyone equip the Spoon?

[Relapse]

Actually, Edward was supposed to be able to equip it, but he rather used it to play his harp.

Why are there no black people in FFIV? (no offence to anyone)