The EoFF Matchmaker is here

[NeoCracker]

Just because it didn't work the First time, doesn't mean it Shall Fail again! That is why I bring you the EoFF Matchmaker. With its new title comes new and improved features. Here's how the Game shall work.

PM Me, Title it Matchmaker, and put in the following info.

AGe:
Gender:

Self Description, Be it Physical, personality or Political Views or whatever:

Describe your desired date:

Then, I will Pair people off together based on the descripitons given. I'll PM both Parties and give them the location for their date.

Next they shall post their thoughts on the Date. (Note, just make it up as you go, since you can't actually go out on the date.)

And Remember not to post the Descriptions, PM Them.

Now, Lets Begin the EoFF Matchmaker!

[Bart's Friend Milhouse]

You're not going to pimp me are you?

[Mittopotahis]

Ahahaha, am I that desperate?
*is faced with a really hard decision.*

[Christmas]

I'm already married to a few wives, so am I still qualified? I'm always out for more wives. :bigsmile:

[Chemical]

curious and curiouser.

[Citizen Bleys]

This is a horrible idea.

Unless you plan on matching people up with someone they're going to hate and then laughing at their antics.

[Rocket Edge]

This is a horrible idea.
It's only a bit of fun! However if it wasn't it would be like the marraiges in the middle east.

I won't be participating.

[Shauna]

What Bleys said sounds good!

[Citizen Bleys]

(God voice): OF COURSE IT'S A GOOD IDEA

[Avarice-ness]

Matchmaker, Matchmaker,
Make me a match,
Find me a find,
catch me a catch
Matchmaker, Matchmaker
Look through your book,
And make me a perfect match

:razz: I finally found a place that Fiddler on the Roof lyrics are welcome!

[Chemical]

Bleys don't be a wanker.

This isn't Lava Life of course it's just for laughs at the expense of others and for that I'm submitting you into the Matchmaking pile.


Marcus
-----------------
Age: old
Gender: Male

Description: Desparate, old and crotchety. He's a funny man, not too serious but he has the anger of the old Gods fired up in his loins. he can be scarey at times but that's just a guise; on the inside he's just a little kitten that's just learned how to piss in a catbox. (Good boy!) His interests are Gotsecs, Yelling, Video gaming and his crotch.

Convinced of their ideas and strong-willed. He is foresighted and willful. Combative strength. He always realizes his schemes. Can undertake big projects, conclude them successfully and receive the deserved rewards. He likes responsibilities and difficulties above all, and imposes himself forcefully.

Weaknesses: Combative force can lead to violence if he thinks it necessary. He is bold, presumptuous, intrepid: he likes to face danger and can naturally have a few hiccups on the way.

Ultimately he is the dark lord of EoFF. The ugly yet alluring Bach here to steal your daughters and make them into his dancing, wine drinking crotch slaves.


His Date: She should be Asian, submissive; she must be patient and like to give spounge baths. Looks aren't an issue as Bleys never tears his eyes away from the videogame screen. She should be quiet, probably even mute; Bleys likes it when they can't talk back. She should be comfortable with shackles and be prepared to carry a ball and chain for the rest of her life and must like being burried alive with her tyrant.

She should also be wild. A real pirate and a pistol. Cocky and perhaps angry, he loves a good challenge so she should be able to scheme secretly but never be smarter than him; Bleys simply hates to fail.

[LoveArya]

lol

[Bahamut2000X]

Ahahaha, am I that desperate?
*is faced with a really hard decision.*

[NeoCracker]

OF course your elligable Chirstmas, these things have never cared about Moratlity anyway.

And Shut up bleys, your too old, so your opinion has been rejected.

[Citizen Bleys]

Bleys don't be a wanker.


1) Your profile is so far off that they don't even speak the same language wherever the hell it is.

2) Perish like the worm you are.

[SilverWind]

Heh. Sure I'm in. Let's see what happens.

[NeoCracker]

Lets start things off then.

First off we have the Defiler of Shlups Avatar.

User: Craig
Age: 58
Gender: Male

I'm widowed. I lost my wife when I was only 22. After that I pretty much became a recluse, and have been ever since. I live on a normal street, but none of my neighbours know me.

I generally spend most of my time shooting down the birds that fly over my garden, and torturing the ones that are still alive. I also spend alot of time feeding the many cats that have found their way into my house, because of all the dead birds.

I'm looking for someone young and attractive, preferably with no family in the area so that if she goes missing it will take longer before the police are alerted.

Given how most of this is a Lie, I"m going for the polar opposite. This is a surprise date, that no one expected. In his PM to me he seemed very eager in his old age to meat some one. For that I give him the honor of being with his Perfect Match, I present to you the person that deserves to be on this game more than anyone else.
User: Cititzen Bleys

Age: old
Gender: Male

Description: Desparate, old and crotchety. He's a funny man, not too serious but he has the anger of the old Gods fired up in his loins. he can be scarey at times but that's just a guise; on the inside he's just a little kitten that's just learned how to piss in a catbox. (Good boy!) His interests are Gotsecs, Yelling, Video gaming and his crotch.

Convinced of their ideas and strong-willed. He is foresighted and willful. Combative strength. He always realizes his schemes. Can undertake big projects, conclude them successfully and receive the deserved rewards. He likes responsibilities and difficulties above all, and imposes himself forcefully.

Weaknesses: Combative force can lead to violence if he thinks it necessary. He is bold, presumptuous, intrepid: he likes to face danger and can naturally have a few hiccups on the way.

Ultimately he is the dark lord of EoFF. The ugly yet alluring Bach here to steal your daughters and make them into his dancing, wine drinking crotch slaves.


His Date: She should be Asian, submissive; she must be patient and like to give spounge baths. Looks aren't an issue as Bleys never tears his eyes away from the videogame screen. She should be quiet, probably even mute; Bleys likes it when they can't talk back. She should be comfortable with shackles and be prepared to carry a ball and chain for the rest of her life and must like being burried alive with her tyrant.

She should also be wild. A real pirate and a pistol. Cocky and perhaps angry, he loves a good challenge so she should be able to scheme secretly but never be smarter than him; Bleys simply hates to fail.

I'll send out the PM's and inform them of their Date. Our lovely couple had visited a Small Sushi Bar on the coast of California followed by a Disco. Lets see how the date went. (Just improve it when you post, I'd like to here both View Points.

[Renmiri]

ROFL

Just look at the sigs around the Eyes threads. If there's one thing EoFF does not need is a matchmaker!

I'm almost suggesting changing the forum name to "The Love Boat" ! ;)

[Citizen Bleys]

drink bleach pls

[Yamaneko]

Bleys can be The Skipper and Unne can be Gilligan.

I know, not the same show.

[NeoCracker]

Hey, this one was your Idea Bleys.

[~*~Celes~*~]

ROFL

Just look at the sigs around the Eyes threads. If there's one thing EoFF does not need is a matchmaker!

I'm almost suggesting changing the forum name to "The Love Boat" ! ;)

Yush ^^ *points to her siggie*

[Araciel]

i don't know that i would want to be matched up with anyone around here...i'm too old :P

[Chemical]

As Bleys closest friend I'd like to report that they had a spectacular time. I secretly followed them and took some photos. <3 Because I love Bleys so much and want him to remember the good times.


Well this is the whore they ate sushi off of:
http://www.nonplus.net/blog/images/sashimi_girl.jpg

This is them taking a romantic walk along the strip; Bleys showing his true feelings with a gentle hug:
http://www.aeroplastics.net/Diana_Blok/Gay_couple_Salvador.jpg

Oh it was a long day and time for a little nap shhhhh. Aren't they cute?:
http://www.nlgba.com/images/out_on_court/gay-couple-16.jpg


Between you and me Bleys is just playing hard to get.