Coca-Cola Tech Support

[Citizen Bleys]

Every can of coca-cola has a label on the side that says "QUESTIONS? 1-800-452-2653"

What kind of questions could anybody possibly have about a can of Coke? This makes no sense to me, therefore I decided to put on my best fake Ukrainian accent and give them a call. (There was a short wait before the rep answered, so I started the recording at that point instead of while dialing)

Bleys Pranks Coca-Cola (http://www.vespernet.org/cocacola.mp3)

I still can't bloody well believe it...Too bad they didn't ask for any identification. I could see it now.

"Yes? This is Vasily Huculak from Ukraine. Phone number? I do not know phone number. Some schmuck, he leave cell phone at bar. So now, I have cell phone. Is good, ah? I kid, I kid. I give phone back in 2 or 3 day. Is very expensive to call Ukraine, but not if using some other schmuck's sell phone, ah? Is good."

[Araciel]

i got a 'rotten' can once...it does happen

[Dr Aum]

Some friends and I saw that for some time last year, all Sobe bottles asked you to call in with your "Sobe story" for a chance to win some prize.

Oh, we gave 'em a story, alright.

[Madonna]

You should transcribe that because I could not understand anything past your horrid Canadian accent.

[escobert]

You should transcribe that because I could not understand anything past your horrid Canadian accent.
I understood "how do I open this fucking thing!?"

[Araciel]

canadian accent hehehe yeah

[vorpal blade]

Why a Ukranian accent?

And while I can't imagine what kind of questions there could be about this, you must understand that we live in a siociety in which people must (by law) be warned that their coffee is hot. I'm sure there are people who make good use of this number.

[Old Manus]

I for one take much offence at this disgusting portrayal of my homeland. :nonono:

[Meat Puppet]

While you were making this prank, someone real missed out on getting tech support.

[escobert]

srsly.

[Psychotic]

They probably thought you were trying to be Borat.

[Araciel]

They probably thought you were trying to be Borat.

and honestly, shame on you if that's true...cause who wants to be borat

[Citizen Bleys]

Why a Ukranian accent?

Because I am one, by upbringing.

And no, Borat's accent does not sound Ukrainian. He's supposed to be a Kazakh.

[Psychotic]

And do you really think that Coca-Cola helpline staff can tell the difference?

[fantasyjunkie]

I worked for Coca Cola the Evil Empire for 2 years. There's a lot of people out there that ask lots of questions about the ingredients and expiration dates and stuff. And every once in a while you will get a Coke employee that's a complete ass to some little old lady while he is stocking Coke at some grocery store.
Man, the people at Coke are complete jerks BTW. Trying to force us to work overtime without pay. (We had to threaten legal action on that one), harrassment when you are sick, giving you a hard time on milege reimbersement on your car when you actually drive the milege you write down on the paperwork.(Sometimes we drive our own cars from grocery store to grocery store to tear down pallets of soda the truck drivers drop off).
Very bad company to work for. Glad I was laid off, best thing that ever happened to me.

[DarkLadyNyara]

That was great. ^_^ Pity you couldn't record both sides of the convo. :lol:


While you were making this prank, someone real missed out on getting tech support.
About a can of Coke? Feh.

[Jojee]

Transcription plx. ^^

It won't let me hear it.

[rubah]

wow guys I tried to call coke's hotline just now? I couldn't get an answer. The line was busy for like a whole thirty seconds! Then I called pepsi and they gave me free phone sex.

[Shoeberto]

How can we prove that you were actually on the phone?
I DEMAND ANSWERS

edit: directed towards Bleys. I believe every word of Allie's story.

[Roto13]

I could post a sound file of myself say "What are you wearing, Psy? Take it off. *shudder*" and you'd have to believe it.

[Madonna]

Or, better yet, you could mix it with Bleys' and see where it gets you.

In fact, we should have a "fake a conversation with Bleys" thread.

[Tasura]

For those of you who cant understnad him? HOW? He is speaking english xD Yes, I know the "Canadian accent" and all, but it was still quite clear.

[Shoeberto]

Or, better yet, you could mix it with Bleys' and see where it gets you.

In fact, we should have a "fake a conversation with Bleys" thread.
It's like Colbert's Green Screen Challenge but audio. I like.

[Drex]

Bleys, I <3 you.

Sadly, Nyke and I were just discussing your FF7 fanfic last night, as well.

[Christmas]

Just in case you do something like this, (http://forums.eyesonff.com/showthread.php?t=99544) they might offer advice to prevent it or so. :bigsmile:

PS: Or if it is a hot babe that answer the phone, ask for her number guys. :bigsmile:

[Citizen Bleys]

Sadly, Nyke and I were just discussing your FF7 fanfic last night, as well.

Oh bloody hell. How long will it take for that infernal thing to drop off the face of the internet? Back then my idea of comedy was to make some gay joke anytime I was struggling to find something funny to write. It's crap, and I'm ashamed of it.

[Yamaneko]

I'm glad we've moved onto greater things.

[Jowy]

There's nothing greater than hassling Coca-Cola though. Yams is crazy.

[Drex]

Don't worry - we only remembered the good parts. ^_^

[Madonna]

Kind of like the Princess Bride then, abridged by William Goldman?

I would too call Coke and hilariously explain some plight of mine, but I need to storm up something believable; sounding Canandndian (however you spell it) does just not cut it.

[Hambone]

I wonder if they knew it was a prank call, or if it were just technical problems.

[Citizen Bleys]

Don't worry - we only remembered the good parts. ^_^

The only good part was the ominous, forbidding wire of death. The rest of it wasn't funny.

[fantasyjunkie]

You guys crack me up! :D :D :D :D :D