I like frogs

[COLOR=#ff0000]I had one of those weird dreams today where everything felt like real life, though it is impossible. When I awoke, I was so surprised that none of it really happened.
Anyway, this will give you some insight into my broken mind and how deluded and video game influenced it is.

I'll piece together the scraps here.

I was playing something like Warcraft 2. I had an aerial view, and I think that it was all fun and games, but there was definitely some ...

My job is in a pretty lousy neighborhood. I have beggars who come in regularly, strange young punks who hang out behind my shop late at night so it's kinda creepy to close and lock up, creeps who walk into my store and talk about magic and whatever- kinda scary.
In any event, some dude ran into my store all hyper. Didn't look like a customer so I was thinking "beggar. High."
He runs up to my desk and says, "Give me a pencil!"
So my mind started racing. [I]I ...

What an awesome day at work.
Every day, more people are coming in. More inventory is coming in.
After some infuriating moments this week, today was a big comeback. Maybe it was because I was there the whole time. I was able to handle everything on the spot. Maybe I should just work the full 14 hours every dang day.
No.
But seriously, today was very inspiring, and I think I'm going to have a strong 3rd month in business. I'm out of reward cards. My business cards are all ...

All who live were born to die - The Vampire

So, I am involved in selling this miracle juice called Mona Vie. It's a multilevel marketing gig, which isn't usually my schtick, but I happen to be able to sell it and use it as a healthy element of my cafe, which makes it less of a pyramid for me and more of a relatively controlled source of supply for healthy, higher end drinks and mixes (although my clientele is about as "high end as a brachiosaurus' tail. That is, it's a much lower ...

Why do people call pokemon Pokey Mans? Do they really not know the name? I doubt it. The spelling doesn't look anything like pokeyman. Nobody would actually mispronounce it that way. Certainly not a large enough population that the mispronunciation should be as widespread as it is. No. It is obviously a method of mocking the children's game. Many time, I believe it is a term used to represent that an adult is unwilling to confess that he is aware of gaming culture enough to pronounce a weird Japanesey ...

It seems like a pretty stupid idea now. I have a hard enough time finding a girl who's smart enough, sexy enough, and strong enough that I'd like to fertilize her eggs. If she had a kid, the last thing I'm going to do it pop it into my mouth on a night when there isn't any ketchup in the fridge to put on my salami sandwich. But I guess we really have to consider the times. This is, like, the 21st century. Society has had 136 million years of development between phytosaurs and modern homosapiens. ...

So, It's time for what I am going to call, uh:
[B]The Annual Anecdote of the Day[/B]

You see, back when I was a kid, I used to take these regular trips to Melbourne to watch a bunch of young punks beat on each other in our little kid zone where Kids Rule until their dad would run in all angry and shout stuff like, "Kids don't rule here anymore!!!"

So that's why I was there.
Anyhow, the two facts you need to know are these: On a long and lonesome ...

Just quit breaking the freaking laundry machine!

We only have 2 of them per floor. And two dryers.
I know it sounds petty, but it is irritating to feel the need to run out and check to see whether the machines are "working" before going through the preparations for doing the laundry. It's annoying to need to do laundry, to know that there are machines available to me, and then to have to drive down the road to use a laundromat because literally HALF the time, let me ...

I know you all like it when I talk about how impressive and knowledgable a Christian I am in comparison to all the tools who come into my store and try to act righteous and pretentious because you know that every time I put them down, I boast, which is the awesome, glorious, sinful culmination of all who accuse others of being hypocrites. I become a hypocrite myself. Then it's all, "lol you stupid fool! You betray your lack of knowledge and faithfulness by professing that you have any at all!" ...

The truth is that I know how to learn Spanish. All I need to do is enter into an intimate relationship with a Cuban. I just haven't gotten around to it yet, and for that, I apologize to everybody who is miserable enough to have to look me in the eye and ask, "habla espanol?"
Anyway, I was going to discuss my adventures in Chile in another thread, but then I remembered that it's better to blog about such things than it is to pollute the forums with irrelevant anecdotes.
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