http://home.eyesonff.com/blog.php/38914-noxious-sunshine The Eyes on Final Fantasy Forums are the premier place for Final Fantasy fans to meet and discuss this classic video game series. Join our community today. en Sat, 09 May 2026 13:02:56 GMT vBulletin 60 http://home.eyesonff.com/images/images_neoclassic/misc/rss.jpg http://home.eyesonff.com/blog.php/38914-noxious-sunshine http://home.eyesonff.com/entry.php/5942-Question Wed, 07 Oct 2015 21:51:55 GMT Okay.

Once again, I apologize for lashing out and bashing eoffers for not doing more. It was very very wrong of me, and I honestly do feel really awful about it. My brain wasn't functioning properly from lack of sleep, being ill, and some other things going on. It's not an excuse and it doesn't make it okay, but all I can say is I sincerely apologize from the bottom of my heart. And I hope y'all can forgive me, but I understand if not. Lesson learned: no more crowd funding attempts.

Here's my next issue: We finally got paid- the rest of my fiancé's paycheck.

There are still 2 anonymous donations left that I haven't withdrawn yet. Yes, it's still very much helpful, we're not entirely out of the woods yet- it'll be a bit. But, I think that we're okay enough that if those 2 people would like for me to refund them, I would be more than happy to.

I thought about doing it anyway, but I don't want to inadvertently offend someone by just doing that.

For everyone else: thanks again so much for the help. It really does mean a lot to the both of us and we appreciate it more than you know. ]]> noxious.sunshine http://home.eyesonff.com/entry.php/5942-Question http://home.eyesonff.com/entry.php/5940-Evacuate Sun, 04 Oct 2015 11:18:28 GMT Hurricane, might have to evacuate, blah blah blah.

I must say I'm a bit disappointed and sad that more people didn't help us with my cat. I really appreciate everything everyone has done with sharing and the few who donated. I actually stayed in tears in and off for awhile over just that little bit.

But, I guess I don't have as many friends as I kind of thought I did (let's not kid ourselves, we know the majority of y'all hate me anyway). & yes, I do understand people have money problems and things like that.

I guess I wrongly assumed/hoped that since other people had done crowdfunding for things like pets and family members that turned out okay, people would be open to helping us too (& yes, I did donate to both of those). We've had to miss paying our phone 2 months in a row and miss a car payment in order to save her. It hasn't helped that the VA is back on their bullshit this year.

My cat is our child. And she's been phenomenal with helping my fiance with his PTSD (along with Penny), anxiety, and depression. She's very loving and snuggly and wonderful.

But. I'm withdrawing the last bit of money someone donated and shut it down.

I apologize if this sounds selfish, rude, or ungrateful. It's a really depressing morning and I haven't really slept or eaten since Friday. It's been a much more depressing week for me in general than normal and I've been sick. Again. And this time with some other shit going on that's made me really uncomfortable and worried and stressed out. ]]> noxious.sunshine http://home.eyesonff.com/entry.php/5940-Evacuate http://home.eyesonff.com/entry.php/5930-Cat-Almost-Died-Now-We-re-Kinda-Broke Thu, 17 Sep 2015 19:12:36 GMT I really don't expect anyone to donate or help.

And I really hate that we're even doing this- it makes me feel pretty selfish and trout (in spite of some friends encouraging us to do so)..

But, here it is:

https://gofund.me/8r4dyyqg


We really appreciate any and all help, if anyone does decide to donate (and this is the part where I -really- want to say "We'll pay you back, eventually")..

And of course, if anyone has any nasty, negative, or otherwise rude comments, please keep that trout to yourself and don't bother. This has been hard enough on the both of us as it is and I don't feeling like getting into any sort of debate over it.

]]> noxious.sunshine http://home.eyesonff.com/entry.php/5930-Cat-Almost-Died-Now-We-re-Kinda-Broke http://home.eyesonff.com/entry.php/5734-We-Are-X Wed, 15 Oct 2014 01:54:15 GMT I know .

I've talked about the concert to death.

But I still can't believe I got to see them.

X Japan is "that" band for me .. I've listened to their music religiously since 2001- when I was going through a really rough time in life and was being bullied nonstop..

I found their music and it just clicked. I fell in love. And I'd lock myself in my room and put their music on repeat and listen for hours. It was during the time when they were broken up- Toshi had left the band to join a cult.

And I remember wishing they were still together, and that they would reunite, but just knew it was unlikely to happen.

Pretty sure I cried a little the first time I watched the PV for "I.V." from the Saw IV soundtrack in 2006.

And then they came here. To New York. To Madison Square Garden. Again, I got really emotional.. They were coming to NYC.. And I just happened to be here..

Money was tight for us when thickets went on sale, and I understood that... But seeing how bummed I was that it wasn't gonna happen, he caved and ordered tickets. That evening.

Their set lasted 3 hours. Naturally, they did tributes to hide and Taiji (both of whom killed themselves, though hide's death was an accident), and they all did solos- Yoshiki's drum solo lasting a whopping 15 minutes.. And Just like with their Last Live concert, he nearly collapsed from putting so much energy into his playing. Sugizo did a violin bit, playing "The Godfather" theme. And Yoshiki did another solo on the piano. It was rather impressive. A stagehand put random sheet music on the piano and he just barely peeked at the notes, unsure of exactly what he was playing but playing it perfectly.

They played the classics- Kurenai, X (the 2 most exciting for me), ENDLESS RAIN, Forever Love (tribute to hide and Taiji), RUSTY NAIL, and some others as well as songs from their upcoming album and I.V.

...And I pretty much cried the whole time.

Yoshiki talked for a bit- about the break up, not speaking to Toshi for 10 years, losing hide and Taiji, and how it had been their dream to play Madison Square Garden for a long time. He cried, I cried, we all cried.

It was an amazing experience and I'm completely gobsmacked that I was able to be there.


[Youttube]YOA9_xLfi6Y[/YouTube] ]]> noxious.sunshine http://home.eyesonff.com/entry.php/5734-We-Are-X http://home.eyesonff.com/entry.php/5662-RIP-In-Peace-Nox Mon, 21 Jul 2014 19:05:36 GMT My nerves are now officially shot.

They want to process these applications and do a rental and credit check.

My credit is shot all to Hell. So is Jay's. Our roommate is the only person with good credit.

I have no idea if they'll accept our applications. I've been on the verge of tears for the last hour. If we don't get this apartment, we're pretty well screwed.

We can stay here in this apartment, but then there's the problem of the dog. Which we've already partially paid for.

I don't get why our landlord has to be such a douchenozzle and not let us have her here. We've told him we'll pay a pet deposit and pay him more in rent, and he still said no.

It's not like this place is even all that great. The carpet is cheap ugly stuff, the kitchen and living room are all one thing, and it's just small as fuck.

IDK what we're gonna do, but at the rate we're going spending money on credit applications, we won't have any options left really quickly. ]]> noxious.sunshine http://home.eyesonff.com/entry.php/5662-RIP-In-Peace-Nox http://home.eyesonff.com/entry.php/5638-If-I-Could-Live-In-A-Hotel Fri, 04 Jul 2014 00:01:03 GMT I would totally do it . IDK what it is about a nice hotel, but I want to live in one. I would totally do it .

IDK what it is about a nice hotel, but I want to live in one. ]]> noxious.sunshine http://home.eyesonff.com/entry.php/5638-If-I-Could-Live-In-A-Hotel http://home.eyesonff.com/entry.php/3665-Sjdjdududuudjdududududdu Tue, 24 Jun 2014 01:23:36 GMT lol.. My child embraces her Mexican-ness a lot more than I thought she did. She loves being able to say that she's Mexican.. And I'm really proud of her.

And something that really made me smile.. I took her to the park and she found another little girl to play with that "looks like her"... P brought her over to introduce us and the girl told me she's Colombiana and Parker actually got embarrassed when I said she's "only 1/2" Mexican.

Maybe this trip will turn out to be a lot better for her than I thought it would be. ]]> noxious.sunshine http://home.eyesonff.com/entry.php/3665-Sjdjdududuudjdududududdu http://home.eyesonff.com/entry.php/3659-I-Quit Mon, 16 Jun 2014 17:07:09 GMT I Quit Life.

I'm banning myself.

Not only did I pass out in the movie theater on Saturday, but I also managed to slice a -chunk- (yes. A chunk. Small one, but still a chunk) of my index finger off last night

And then not long after, I stubbed my big toe pulling a heavy box to the spare bedroom and managed to rip off 1/2 my toenail.

Go Me. ]]> noxious.sunshine http://home.eyesonff.com/entry.php/3659-I-Quit http://home.eyesonff.com/entry.php/3647-La-Hermanita Fri, 06 Jun 2014 05:46:25 GMT My little sister is coming to NYC to visit me for her birthday in October!!

I'm so incredibly excited and can't wait.

I'm beyond proud of her and everything she's accomplished... She had a rough time back when I was dating my ex - her family wasn't supportive and they all wanted to keep her under lock & key..

And of course it really took a toll on her. She literally was not ever allowed out of the house ever. She had to resort to skipping school and sneaking out at night just to get some freedom- even though she kept up with her homework.

I could never tell any of them that they were having a negative effect on her, because I knew it'd start more drama and they'd all get mad at me and watch my little sister even more closely.

But sure enough, she told me she dropped out of middle school for 5 months after I went back to Nashville and ran away. No one ever heard from her until she went back.

After she went home, she went back to school, dropped out of Freshman year of HS because she wanted to work, but then went back and juggled a full time job and high school. And worked her ass off.

She wound up having the highest grades in her school, tested in for the Senior Class when she was only a Sophomore, and graduated high school early.

She graduated from ASU in 2011- she's only 21 now. So she was about 18 when she graduated.

She's the first and only one in her family to have gone to college and graduate.

Words can't express how incredibly proud I am of her.

And I'm so thankful that we're back in touch now. I really missed her and "my other sister".. And that sister's kids.

I miss the whole family, to be honest. Minus my ex. They all really kind of rallied around me and supported me when they didn't have to. At all. They could've said "Bye Guera- bounce" and put me out on the streets. In the ghetto.

Anywho- my little sister is coming to NYC to visit me for her birthday in October.. And I'm incredibly excited. I'm planning on getting her a Pandora bracelet and charm as a gift- and of course, we'll take her out to dinner and stuff to celebrate.

Ugh.. I'm so stoked. I've missed her so much over the years.. And I'm glad to know that she's missed me as well. ]]> noxious.sunshine http://home.eyesonff.com/entry.php/3647-La-Hermanita http://home.eyesonff.com/entry.php/3644-Si-Una-Vez Wed, 04 Jun 2014 17:48:21 GMT K so I found my ex's 2 sisters on Facebook.

I friended the older one and talked to her for a bit, then his little sister that I was also rly close to friended me and we talked quite a bit.

It was good. Everyone's doing well. The younger sister is engaged and getting married next year,the older one had twins not long after I moved back to Tennessee, and now her older 2 daughters have babies of their own.

... My ex is doing well. He's married with kids and bought a house . I'm happy for him. I can't believe I said that. I normally hold grudges for the rest of my life and almost never get over stuff.. Especially when it comes to things like how my ex treated me and the shit he put me through. Sure, I might be fine and ok, but it doesn't mean I'm not necessarily over it all. I still have issues and stuff.

But Anywho. I had a good talk with the younger sister. Lol I actually suggested she come to NYC for her honeymoon so we can hang out a little bit.

And I told both her and the other sister thanks for being there when everything got really crazy. They didn't have to do that and it meant a lot to me. She said, "That's what family is for, sister."

It made me a little teary, actually.

The 3 of us were always really close. The older sister's kids used to call me'tía'. I miss them lots. I can't believe it's been almost 10 years. Time goes by way too fast.

There's a lot of questions I have still, but I won't ask them. I don't think I'd like any of the answers very much, so I'm just better off not knowing. ]]> noxious.sunshine http://home.eyesonff.com/entry.php/3644-Si-Una-Vez http://home.eyesonff.com/entry.php/3630-Up! Mon, 19 May 2014 15:13:46 GMT Bitch moved out yesterday.

I didn't think to make her give her keys back. I texted her and told her we need them like yesterday. And she also still owes us $100. She's expecting a package or something though, so.

She left with the married French guy which made us LOL cuz yeah.

So we're alllooooonnneeee now! I'm so ecstatic.
I took a bath and left the door wide open. Kitty tried to save me. haha. She grabbed my fingers in her mouth and tried to pull me out.

And she's been otherwise stalking me while I'm in the bathroom


we've also maybe hopefully found an apartment! Just gotta get credit approved, go see it, and pay the deposits. Which will all happen next month.

And they allow big dogs & actually -want- us to be in a 2 year lease, so it works out perfectly!

I'm so ridiculously happy right now.

Fingers crossed it all works out!!

Also - talked to my girl for a little while last night. I told her about all the things we have planned for her -Statue of Liberty, picnics in Central Park, Central Park Zoo, the aquarium, Coney Island, camping, Fireworks on the 4th of July, shopping, mani-pedis, the beach, the museum, & a ton of other things... and I told her about the new Sailor Moon coming out.

She's soooo excited. And of course, I am too!

I told her about FAO Schwartz and she said "Oh mommy! I have 32 dollars! Will that be enough to get a toy there? Can we put money together and get something good?"

Ugh. So freaking sweet .

I also get her a day early!! My sister was trying to bring her June 15, but they couldn't swing a flight for that day. P doesn't get outta school until June 12- So. Lame. But. I get her for an extra day. Jay is gonna leave school early so that we can go pick her up from the airport. Her GF is flying her up.

EEEEE! I can't wait for her to get here! ]]> noxious.sunshine http://home.eyesonff.com/entry.php/3630-Up! http://home.eyesonff.com/entry.php/3625-Gonna-Be-A-New-Mommy! Thu, 15 May 2014 22:02:03 GMT ...... NO I'm not preggo. God forbid that happens anytime soon.. Or ever again for that matter.

We've found a boxer breeder just under 2 hrs north of us in Hyde Park.. They have a litter of puppies with some available that'll be ready to go at the end of June, but they're also expecting another litter or 2 around that time as well & they'll be ready to go at the end of August/early September.

So to be on the safe side, we're opting for a puppy from the upcoming litter.

The deposit is $300, so we have to wait a couple of weeks for Jay to get paid so that we can send in the application and be officially on the list.

I'm on the fence as to whether I want a boy or girl. We've always had girls when I was growing up, and my dad just got a girl, so I kinda want a boy. But at the same time, we'll be getting a Newfie after we move back to TN and it'll for sure be a boy.

ay ay ay! Decisions Decisions!

Either way, at least we have time to find a place that will allow a bigger dog. I've posted an ad on Craigslist for what we're looking for and a real estate type deal responded & said they had places they can send me info & pics for.

Fingers crossed! ]]> noxious.sunshine http://home.eyesonff.com/entry.php/3625-Gonna-Be-A-New-Mommy! http://home.eyesonff.com/entry.php/2609-Guy-Fieri-s-Cajun-Chicken-Fettuccine-Alfredo Wed, 23 Apr 2014 08:48:04 GMT I'ma post this here and then maybe someday when I unlazy myself, I'll COPY & PASTE this bitch into my food blog....

......... The food blog I haven't updated since 1995.

If any of y'all have ever perused through my food blog, then you know my ass don't measure. I just don't. I go by how things look as far as consistency & how they taste as I add ingredients.

Anyway. This was the first recipe I tried from my Guy Fieri cookbook.. He's the absolute tits. His flavor profile is more on my level (as opposed to Giada, Rachel, Anne, Bobby, and Ina). And while the cookbook I got this from can get pretty irritating 'cuz there's a crap ton of stories and "beginners' guides" to veggies & meats, the recipes are still pretty stellar.

I love cajun chicken pasta. Ever since that first time when I tried it at Chili's. And then started eating Red Lobster's. Chili's uses penne and chopped fresh tomato. And maybe bacon. IDK. Red Lobster's uses fettucini. Whatever.

This is Guy's version. And you can totes add cooked, crumbled bacon.

YOU NEED:

• Boneless, Skinless Chicken Breast
• Olive Oil
• Minced Garlic
• Dry White Wine (Chardonnay)
• Heavy Cream (Get that lil 1/2 sized box if you're just serving 3 or 4 people)
• Sun Dried Tomatoes, chopped or sliced (Do yourself a favor and get the kind that's already packed in oil- then you can have the oil from the tomatoes to use for cooking instead of buying a whole 'nother bottle of $10 regular olive oil. Unless you've already got olive oil. Then do whatever the hell you want)
• Fettuccine
• Parmesan Cheese
• Salt & Pepper
• Finely Chopped Onion (optional)
• Blackening Spice Rub (Store bought or use Guy's version):

It's a mix of:
- Cayenne, White & Black Pepper, Cumin, Garlic Powder, Onion Powder, Salt.

You should make a lot of it. To be safe. Use your best judgment. Don't use a crap ton of cayenne, obvs. Or cumin for that matter. Unless you love cumin. And not much salt is needed. Seriously. There's plenty of sodium in everything else- you don't need the extra in the blackening mix. If you -do- happen to use too much of one thing (namely salt or cayenne), the alfredo sauce will kinda cut through it and mellow it out when you mix the chicken with it.

TO MAKE:

1. Bring a large pot of salted water to a boil , preheat the oven to 350, and heat a large skillet over really high heat. Guy says use a cast iron, but I ain't got that trout, so use a nonstick skillet.
2. Sprinkle, pat, dredge, whatever the chicken in the blackening seasoning, making sure it's all coated.
3. Guy says just throw the chicken in the hot cast iron just like that. No oil or butter. If you're using a non-stick skillet, give it some love with a little olive oil from the sun-dried tomatoes. So that the spice rub doesn't stick to the pan and burn. Or something. Anyway. You're gonna pan sear these bitches for like 3 minutes on each side.
4. Transfer the chicken to a baking dish & stick it in the oven for like 10 min. - until the chicken is cooked through.
5. Then take it out and slice it "on the bias" (whatever that means)
6. So while your chicken is cooking in the oven, do something with that non-cast iron ass skillet you've been cooking in. Wipe it out w paper towels and/or add more olive oil to it.
7. If you opted in for chopped onion (which you should've), then add them to the skillet & sautee for a couple of minutes. Then add the garlic and continue sauteeing for another couple of minutes.
8. Then dump in the wine. Don't ask me how much. Just don't pour in the whole bottle. Or even half of it. Just pour some in.
9. Then dump that heavy cream in & simmer it until it reduces by 1/2 (don't go to quite 1/2way, if you ask me). It'll take a minute for that cream to reduce though. Just saying.
10. Add them there sun dried tomaters & that chikken you cut up however the hell you cut it up.
11. Somewhere during all of this, you were supposed to add the fettuccine noodles to the salted boiling water & cook it to "Al Dente", then drain it - NO RINSING.
12. Back to the sauce now: When you've reduced it enough, add some parmesan & salt & pepper & kinda let it get all creamy and yummy.
13. Then throw the noodles in there with the chicken and like toss it around to coat it and then scoop it onto plates. And top with more parmesan cheese.

Okay. Okay. I just can't wrap my head around how scatterbrained the steps of this recipe seemed to be as I was typing it out.

Also, I kind of find tossing everything together in the pan to be a bit sloppy if you're going for presentation. I would say put a serving of noodles on the plate or in the bowl, then scoop on some of the alfredo, then top with the sliced chicken and sprinkle some parm on there.. And maybe a few extra sliced sun-dried tomatoes.

Adding the chicken to the sauce in the pan works if you want to cut some of the blackened seasoning taste, but if you plate it the way I just said up there, then you can just mix it all up after plating and get the same effect.

If the alfredo sauce seems too thick after adding the parmesan cheese, add more wine- a little at a time- to thin it out. So that it can coat everything. Like I said, I don't measure. So it's up to you to use best judgment.

This turned out really good regardless. I didn't even do the steps exactly right, either.

Also, you could add mushrooms- sautee them somewhat in the olive oil before you add onion & garlic.

And of course crumbled bacon would go very well mixed in with all of this. ]]> noxious.sunshine http://home.eyesonff.com/entry.php/2609-Guy-Fieri-s-Cajun-Chicken-Fettuccine-Alfredo http://home.eyesonff.com/entry.php/2605-I-Have-A-New-Goal Wed, 16 Apr 2014 16:12:07 GMT I've got eleventy billion cookbooks stored on my phone, saved recipes in my Opera Mini (stop laughing), a few dozen more bookmarked in Chrome, and a ton more written down in notebooks and magazine pages ripped out & stuffed in the divider pockets.

Yes. I'm a recipe hoarder. I actually read an article about something along these lines... Reading cookbooks isn't necessarily about cooking the recipes found inside. For me- & people like me- they're read more like actual books. The recipes are more of a journey of sorts.

Anywho.

The problem is... I've only made a small handful of dishes out of what I've collected.

So my new goal is this: I'm going to go through each and every cookbook and recipe I own. And I'm going to make everything in them. One day at a time. ..

... Minus anything that involves clams/oysters/lobster cuz that shit is expensive and I don't own a shucking knife. Nor do I want to. I've had bad enough luck with the brand new ceramic knife we bought a couple of months ago.

Of course, I'm going to switch it up. I'm not gonna just go through one book in order (cuz then we'd have chicken for a straight week, then beef), so I think I'm going to set up a rotation of 3 or 4 books & choose something from each of the different categories in each book. W/E. Y'all know what I mean. xD

So. No matter how unappetizing a lot of Rachel Ray's recipes seem to me, I will cook them. No matter how much butter Paula Deen uses, I will do it (& spend extra time at the gym later... or have a smaller portion).

Yep. ]]> noxious.sunshine http://home.eyesonff.com/entry.php/2605-I-Have-A-New-Goal http://home.eyesonff.com/entry.php/2599-Dark-Paradise Wed, 09 Apr 2014 05:42:33 GMT bvqzPDEvLOw Totally makes me think of my dad and how he must feel struggling to learn to live without my mom. I still hear him cry himself to sleep at night.

Totally makes me think of my dad and how he must feel struggling to learn to live without my mom.


I still hear him cry himself to sleep at night. ]]> noxious.sunshine http://home.eyesonff.com/entry.php/2599-Dark-Paradise