Xenogears Review

Originally Posted by FFIX Choco Boy

I remember playing Croc... At least, in the sense of, I remember that I once had the game disc for Croc in the PS1 while I was playing it, but I have 0 memories of the game itself.

The game was frustrating as smurf.

Originally Posted by Pumpkin

Okay I have some

Yggdra Union (I want to see if I'm interested) I believe it's for GBA and PSP
Ico (I couldn't complete it) PS2 or PS3
Atelier Totori (I really like this game and would like to hear your thoughts) PS3

You're in luck, I have Yggdra Union and need to play more handhelds. You won't have to wait long.

Croc was awesome!

Originally Posted by ToriJ

You're in luck, I have Yggdra Union and need to play more handhelds. You won't have to wait long.

Fair warning, if you have the GBA version of that game it is actually quite hard.

Originally Posted by Rez09

Originally Posted by ToriJ

You're in luck, I have Yggdra Union and need to play more handhelds. You won't have to wait long.

Fair warning, if you have the GBA version of that game it is actually quite hard.

I have the PSP version.

Hello and welcome to ToriJ's Video Game Reviews. We're into the second week of May and this time I'll be playing another well known title of Squaresoft back when they knew how to make video games. I'm not bitter.

Xenogears! The game stars Fei, a villager of Lahan suffering from amnesia. Yeah, I know, if you've played enough JRPGs in the past you've heard this story a million times. Bear with it, it's worth it. Everything is right as rain until mechs (called gears) attack the village and Fei is forced to leave Lahan behind to begin a new adventure.

The game starts off with a very 1990s style animation of a spacecraft under attack that leads to the evacuation of the crew and the Captain getting blown up with the ship after activating the self-destruct sequence. This is the clip they also play if you wait at the title screen so you can watch it twice!

The scene ends with a naked woman before taking us to Lahan under attack. After that plays out we cut back to a foreshadowing scene the day before to see our hero with a picture of a fire. Two minutes in and I'm already confused as all hell.

Shame this won't be worth anything until I'm dead.

Fei's room is where we get our first feel for the controls. One of the first things I noticed is how sensitive the camera is. You can push it ever so slightly and it will still tilt farther than you want it to while trying to see something. Then they throw a bunch of obstacles in your way so you can't see anything!

There's a considerable amount of lag whenever you leave a room. Fei can even move for a good couple of seconds before the game starts to load.

I hope you like zoom ins because boy are there a lot of them! Zoom in when you leave a house, zoom in when you enter, zoom in at the end of a battle, zoom in when a clip ends, you even zoom in at the title screen! What is the deal? Why does everything have to zoom in?

You'd think with how much they love using the zoom in feature that you can use it manually for the camera, but no. You're forced to deal with an over-the-head view while trying to navigate the area around you.

On a positive note, you can jump. Yeah, an RPG where you can actually jump! You can jump on the bed! I'm playing an RPG and I am jumping on my bed!

Another thing that's annoying is when you're trying to leave and the NPC you talked to is still talking. Yeah, with lesser NPCs you still have control of your character. This wouldn't be so bad if there wasn't so many long pauses between text boxes. You think the character is done speaking only to take a couple of steps to find out that they still have something to say. Who does that?

Oh, and there are typos in the text boxes as well. Either missing words or letters screws up the flow of a sentence. Square had a lot of translation problems back then so it's no surprise and luckily it only occasionally happens.

Citan just had to live on top of a SMURfING mountain, didn't he?

Xenogears battle system puts more of an emphasis on combos instead of straightforward physical or magic attacks. Each command spends a set number of points. The stronger you get through battle, the more points you have to spend, and the more points you have to spend, the more combos you can string together for more damage.

It reminds me of Legend of Legaia with all the commands you had to punch in in that game. There's also Chi which has power attacks that affect health or status alignment. There's more animation too as the character will run right in front of the enemy before you choose which command to put in.

Fighting in the gears is mostly the same thing, only with gears you have to keep an eye on your fuel. Run out of fuel and you're smurfed. Gears also have their own health and requires new parts to upgrade them instead of just leveling up.

You can't use the same healing items on gears either so you need to find different ways to keep their HP up. There's Frame HP and Chu Chu that can help with that. Before that boost and enhancements work just fine, although boost only works for fuel.

I actually enjoy the gears battles a lot more than the regular ones and it's another thing that makes Xenogears stand out among the hundreds of other RPGs that are out there. The hunting for different parts gives me happy memories of Armored Core just without the detailed customization.

All right, time to put all that Evangelion binging to good use.

Sweet Jesus, where do I even begin with this story? Xenogears probably has the best amnesia story I've ever seen in a JRPG so far. Fei goes through several different flashbacks and we're shown clues to who he is prior to the reveal.

They aren't just ass pulls for the sake of shock value, you can actually piece this stuff together and it makes sense when the reveal happens. It then expands and the more things tie together the crazier, and crazier it gets until you reminiscent about the time Xenogears was about a small village getting ready for a wedding.

The religious symbolism in the game is really well done. The meaning behind the two one- winged angel statues you see later in the game is beautiful, and much later on ironic after you find out the truth. Just how everything came to be and the connection to the opening at the start ties together very nicely. Usually, I don't have any issues with giving spoilers, but this is one of those times where I'm not going to give too much away since it's something you really need to experience for yourself.

The characters are all likable and has several memorable villains along the way. They even have voice actors whenever the game switches to animation during some of the scenes. Though the lip synch could use some work.

Oh, I'm supposed to press X. I had so many X's in my face that I forgot.

Xenogears is the most ambitious RPG to come out of Square, and I don't think they've made anything since that comes close to it. Crazy to think that once upon a time this game could have been Final Fantasy VII. Regardless of what it's called, Xenogears is a great game worth checking out if you love the genre.

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Regarding the typos and whatnot - the translation's arguably really well done, considering there was one translator working on the whole game. ONE! As a professional translator I can attest that, given the circumstances, the guy did amazingly.

Did they ever start hiring more people to do the translations for them? Because that trout is just ridiculous.

Translating is actually one of the most underrated professions. People expect us to work fast, efficiently, and for free. Apparently, at the beginning there were more translators on the team, but for one reason or another, they left. I expect they were hilariously underpaid.

There's honestly only so much one person can do - you need editors, you need to divide your work reasonably, which is why translating games is always done by teams. The poor guy reportedly moved into his office to finish the translation on time. A couple typos is really the least of your problems when you're sleep deprived.

Well, like I said, it only happens occasionally. I wasn't trying to pick on the guy or anything.

I know you weren't

It's just funny to see how all this video gaming stuff used to require such sacrifice. I think the creator of SH1's cutscenes also had to do it alone and also had to move into his office, and I'm pretty sure Yasunori Mitsuda did the same when he wanted to prove he could compose the soundtrack to Chrono Trigger. I'm just hoping that Xenogears guy got to work on some better organized projects later.

Most of the team didn't want to deal with, not only was the game text heavy but some of the misspelled religious terms were a result of the translators trying to translate the katakana that was translating Jewish and Latin terms into Japanese. According to an interview with Richard Honeywood (Square-Enix's Head of Localization) Xenogears and the troubles it caused actually allowed some positive changes to occur on how Square went about localizing future titles.

Originally published on 11.28.11

Spyro the Dragon. Another video game from my childhood that I have many fond memories of, and perhaps the only game I've played where the enemies actually moon you. Oh yes, they know you're literally going to toast their asses so why not show it to you?

Spyro would go on to become a critical and commercial success, but much like Crash Bandicoot, things would go downhill when the series moved on to other developers. I don't know what the deal is, but it seems whenever platformers venture too far away from their roots things just doesn't work out too well. Just ask Sonic.

Originally developed by Insomniac Games, Spyro the Dragon charged his way into all of our hearts in the fall of 1998. At the beginning of the game we cut to an on-air interview being conducted, and how dragons got their hands on human equipment to begin with is anyone's guess. Everyone has lived in harmony up to this point, but when a creature called Gnasty Gnorc is mentioned, one of the dragons cite that he is not a threat to the Dragon Kingdom, and ugly. Well, as you can probably imagine by his name alone, Gnasty Gnorc doesn't like this one bit and cast a spell that turns all the dragons into stone (so much for not being a threat), except for Spyro, who manages to evade the spell due to his small stature. Honestly, when I watched it it looked like he was just lying there the whole time.

This pegs the question, if he's powerful enough to just turn all the full-grown dragons into stone what's stopping him from invading their worlds? Better yet, why are adult dragons, upon being released, so okay about a baby dragon going after a guy who just kicked their asses without having to leave his lair? It makes no sense, but I digress.

You start off in the Artisans world where you release your first dragon (not a very hard spell to reverse). He gives you some starting information and tells you to free dragons first before going after Gnasty Gnorc. After the clip you can save your game by stepping on the platform left behind by where the dragon was once trapped. Each dragon you release will offer you tips throughout the game, some of them helpful, some of them not so much, and others will just waste your time.

In order to access the next world you have to release a set number of dragons, gems, and dragon eggs. Instead of levels you access each stage through portals. Latter worlds offer a Flying Stage where Spyro can fly freely through the air and has to get past four different sets of obstacles before time runs out.

Throughout the game Spyro has a little golden firefly that follows him around. This firefly acts as a means of protection against enemies and each hit it takes changes the color of its body. When the firefly is no longer present that means one more hit will cost you a life. In order to keep the firefly afloat seek out animals and burn them. Doing so will release a butterfly (don't ask me why) to feed your butterfly.

There isn't much in ways of drawbacks without nitpicking. There are times where the camera won't follow the player, but I didn't find the issue to be as apparent as it was in Croc. As I've already mentioned above, the dragons can go from helpful, to not so helpful, especially if you actually took the time to read the instruction manual. Playing the game you can really tell how much thought and effort went into it. It looks great, it sounds great, the music is great, the voice acting isn't amazing by any stretch of the imagination, but it's not bad either. For something mainly meant for kids it's pretty good. The characters designs and level designs also look great and the game itself really takes advantage of everything the original PlayStation had to offer.

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Hello and welcome to ToriJ's Video Game Reviews. Today we'll be looking at another popular game by Telltale based on the Fables comic books created by Bill Willingham: The Wolf Among Us!

You play as Bigby, formerly known as the Big Bad Wolf, who has been appointed sheriff of Fabletown where all the fables have come to start a new life for themselves.

Bigby comes across a murder of one of the fables and begins an investigation that gets crazier, and crazier with each new episode. If it's anything like Phoenix Wright's cases I'm going to need a drink.

Nice wallpaper.

As usual the most you have to do is click on text boxes, fulfill quick time events, and explore areas to advance the plot.

Since I'm playing on the computer this time around it's less about pressing the right button and more about hovering the mouse over the right text box. At least they're in text boxes and not just rows of text on top of one another.

The artwork is beautiful and does its best to capture the comic book world it's inspired from. Since I haven't actually sat down and read a single Fables comic I can't really comment any further than that.

Should I kick it down? I should kick it down, I'm sure Beauty won't mind.

Moving around is as restrictive as you can expect. There are even fewer walking around moments than in The Walking Dead games. Makes sense since you're not running away from walkers or crazy people.

There are plenty of times where you can just punch a person, and I'd be lying if I said that didn't feel good. Some times it's unavoidable and you end up in a fight with that person regardless, but some times it's actually a result of your own choices.

This game makes it pretty easy to want to punch someone, stomp on them, or rip off their head in front of an entire community. Not that I have any experience with that.

In the first episode you meet a woman named Faith, a prostitute that's fallen on hard times. Times would become even tougher because later the same night you find her head delivered to your doorstep and the mystery begins. You go from lead to lead trying to solve it and can even name who you suspect. I named the Pimp at first, made the most since.

But doesn't there seem to be something missing from this investigation? Something that's kind of important? Evidence! You're never able to find any evidence linking to the actual murders. They even say as much near the end. You have to rely on a single witness' testimony to lock the guy up.

Maybe that was part of the point to make you wonder if the guy was really guilty or not, but damn. You'd think during an investigation there'd be some time set aside to actually finding something more reliable than people's stories.

People aren't the most reliable of sources. They can lie, or their memory can be crap. Hell, your witness basically DOES lie to you in the end. No wonder Bigby drinks.

The characters are awesome and I love the tie ins with all the different fables. From the little things like Huff and Puff cigarettes and Georgie's tattoo, to bigger things like the relationship between Bloody Mary and the Magic Mirror.

Bigby is just a guy with a dark past trying to do what's right and having one wrong thing after another happen to him. Hardly anyone will give this guy a break. If I had a nickel for every time someone picked a fight with him I'd need a bigger coin purse.

Snow is a pretty good supporting character to Bigby and shows you can be a strong woman without having to run around and beat people up. A rarity these days. That's a pretty big departure from how she was in her original fairytale.

Some of the voices are recognizable if you played The Walking Dead first. Melissa Hutchison (the voice actor for Clementine) pulls double duty as Toad Jr. and Beauty using her Season 1 Clem voice for Toad and Season 2 voice for Beauty. I kept expecting Beauty to say, “Still not bitten!” whenever she was together with Beast.

Dave Fennoy (voice for Lee) also plays Bluebeard in this. I'm not saying there's anything wrong with companies hiring on the same voice actors for other roles, it's just a little daunting hearing the same voices for vastly different characters.

To Fennoy's credit, he changes his voice just enough to where he does sound like a different character with some familiarity. But Hutchison? That voice just doesn't work coming out of those characters mouths.

Another favorite of mine is Nerissa, formerly known as The Little Mermaid. I may be a bit bias in this area because I always liked The Little Mermaid, but they really do do a good job bringing this character to life.

When you first meet her she's in nothing but her underwear and it's the most natural piece of nudity I've ever seen in a game. It's the only piece of nudity I've ever seen in a game.

Nerissa starts out as just a woman just trying to get by and turns out to be the mastermind behind the whole thing. She pretended to be Faith, made sure Bigby found the real Faith, and saw to it that the Crooked Man was locked away. That's badass! But enough about the good guys (though I guess that's debatable) let's talk about villains.

Bloody Mary. Not since Carver have I utterly despised a villain as much as Bloody Mary. From the very first moment I saw this character I wanted nothing more than to rip her smurfing head off, and because of this she's a brilliant villain.

This woman could give Ramsay Snow from Game of Thrones a run for his money. She's battrout insane and doesn't give two trouts about anything. She's just waiting for an excuse to be let off her leash.

The Crooked Man is more your subtle, manipulative villain who works through pawns to keep his hands clean. A man who takes advantage of people to meet his own ends. He nearly talks his way out of guilt near the game's climax. Assuming you bring him back alive, that is. Man do they give you SO many chances to kill him.

What more can I say? The Wolf Among Us is a great game and it's easy to see why so many fans are hoping for a sequel.

If you love all things Telltale, or point and click adventures, or if you're familiar with the comics at all, then this may very well be the game for you.

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Originally published on 12.05.11

If you don't like Anime I suggest you turn back now.

Evil Zone, Eretzvaju in Japan, is a versus fighting game developed by YUKE's Future Media Creators (best known for their work on the WWE SmackDown series) and published by Titus Software in North America and Europe.

It should be noted that the game is not based off any existing Anime. The game is simply Anime inspired. More on that in a moment.

After starting up the game it opens with some narration by Paul Eiding (best known for his work as Roy Campbell in the Metal Gear Solid series) who also offer his voice for one of the main playable characters in the game. He tells us about the game's main villain, Ihadurca, a being capable of existing in multiple dimensions at one time. When she threatens the world of I-Praseru the inhabitants, through great cost, manages to conceal her in a confinement they call Evil Zone. Knowing that this would only be temporary, they summon warriors from different worlds to compete in a tournament to determine the strongest fighter that would challenge Ihadurca to the death in Evil Zone.

Why don't they just summon an army?

Once the beginning narration is over we get an animated montage of all the characters in the game and they are as followed:

Danzaiver: “The power of the Supreme Ruler destroys evil! The ultimate hero! DANZAIVER!” Who also looks like a VR Trooper. Danzaiver is part of the Galactic Frontier Civilization Defense System as a special inspector and is the game's self-proclaimed protagonist.

Alty Al Lazel: A sorcerer of great power, but a shy, sensitive soul who tries to appear tougher than he really is. As an native to I-Praseru he opposes the summonings and enters the tournament to take out Ihadurca himself, even though he seems to be responsible for the summoning of most of the main characters. Oops.

Keiya Tenpouin: Keiya of Tenpouin Clan. A mysterious and dark soul with great fashion sense. He's entering the tournament because he wants to take Ihadurca power and use it to resurrect a lost love one call Himika. Aww! I guess he isn't so bad after all. You know, when he's not stepping on your head.

Erel Plowse: You know that Anime character where the first aspect of them you notice is their breasts? Say hello to Erel Plowse! Although to be fair, by Anime standards her breast size aren't really all that abnormal. Erel is a Mercenary with a suit of living armor (that's right, I said LIVING!) name the void, who has a love interest going on with Al, which of course is the reason she wants to enter the tournament and defeat Ihadurca to impress him. Because nothing says “I love you” like killing a woman! No really, what the hell?

Midori Himeno: Well, no Anime-inspired game is complete without a Martial Artist! Midori is a passionate young grappler who attends the Fuin Martial Arts School in Japan. Always seeking strong opponents to fight, Midori jumps to the call of competing in a tournament where she has a chance to face an extremely dangerous and powerful supreme being that could kill her! Seriously, what is wrong with the females in this game? Is there not one sensible female character?

*sighs in content*

Setsuna Saizuki: Is a college student who shares her body with Karin. A kind of spirit being that only Setsuna can see and gives her supernatural powers. Unlike Erel who enters the tournament to impress a boy she likes, and Midori who's just looking to show off her fighting skills, Setsuna is lured to Ihadurca through an unknown connection between her and Karin which is revealed in her story.

While the English version claims she's a college student it should be noted that in the Japanese version she was a 14 year old girl. I can only suspect that the change was due to all the various panties shots you'll see of her during game play. She's not the only character in the game to get an age change, but hers is a bit more notable since well, she doesn't look 21 at all.

Gally “Vanish” Gregman: Then we have our Bounty Hunter, Gally “Vanish” Gregman, voiced by Paul Eiding. He's pretty much the large powerhouse of the game and his motivations for entering the tournament is quite simple. He was hired and paid to do it. Despite being a well-accomplished Bounty Hunter he's a good person at heart who loves his wife (yes, he has a wife, and a dog, and a wee bit of a drinking problem) very, very much.

Linedwell Rainrix: Say hello to the sociopath that only a mother could love. Linedwell Rainrix, Lie for short, is a psychopath who wants to become a metal rock musician. Naturally. In his possession is a magic sword that goes by Shahal (meaning Lucifer – god of the morning star) who is enemies with Keiya after killing his lover.

Kakurine: Kakurine is a priestess over 10,000 years old, but lives beyond time and in the body of a little girl. She even goes as far as to act like one, but her voice will hit puberty faster than you can say YUGIOH! Kakurine has transcendental powers and is one of the tougher opponents in the game, normally found near the end of each Story Mode before you finally reach Ihadurca. Why she chose a body of a little girl is never fully explained, but at least she isn't spending all her time in a school.

Ihadurca: Last, but certainly not least, The Absolute Existence, Ihadurca! Not much back story is offered of her from and since I want to avoid as many spoilers as possible you'll just have to play the game to find out more.

With the montage complete we are brought to the main menu of the game which consist of four primary modes: Story, One Player Battle, VS, and Survival, with a Practice mode near the end.

Story Mode: Every character in the game has their own unique story that is presented in the form of a TV show. After the preview we're given a pre-match and post-match clip with the character you're fighting. Since there are only ten characters there are only ten episodes, meaning you face a copy of yourself. The end of each story isn't anything amazing though, it's done in Japanese animation but the animation is silent and often interrupted by the credits.

One Player Battle: This is basically Story Mode without the story. If you like the classic arcade feel of a fighting game this is the mode for you.

VS Mode: Challenge a friend and pick one of eleven stages available to you in VS Mode. Ten stages belonging to their respective characters, with a background song that is their own personal theme, and the eleventh stage basically being the training stage used in Practice Mode. The game is only two players, so if you have more than two people you're gonna have to take turns.

Survival Mode: Basically what you would expect it to be. Choose your fighter and then take on as many enemies as you can before dying.

Every character can charges up their health bar causing a red crystal to appear that acts as your finisher. Every character has one. The whole animation (not drawn) for the finish will only be shown if the opponent's health bar is low enough for them to be taken out with the move.

There is no regular jumping performed in the game, but you can perform a jump attack. It's a simple control system where you don't have to worry about complicated combos to perform certain moves. I'm looking at you Mortal Kombat!

The biggest con in the game is basically the dubbing. It's godawful! Some times it isn't so bad, but other times you can see the character is clearly still talking even though no sound is coming out of their mouth. It's just distracting and takes you out of the story.

Another flaw is that the story can be a little hard to follow at times. Some of the characters will start talking and offer little to no explanation on what they're actually talking about. You'll have to read their bio if you want the full story.

Overall, whether or not you'll enjoy this game comes down to one simple question. Do you like Anime? If you're a huge Anime nut then chances are you'll enjoy this game. If you're not a fan of Anime, if you don't enjoy it at all, then your chances of liking this game are rather slim. You may or may not enjoy the actual game play, but as far as everything else is concerned? You're probably not going to like it. So, if you're a huge fan of Anime and/or fighting games in general I recommend checking it out.

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Two weeks have passed since the infection spread across the city of Pennsylvania. Green Flu, they called it. A highly contagious virus that caused aggression, mutation, and loss of higher brain functions. There were only four of us now. Bill, Louis, Francis, and myself. For whatever reason we were immune to the virus.

I wasn't in any position to ask why. Only thankful that I didn't have to worry about becoming one of those things. I heard it said all the time that, “There are some things worse than death.” I didn't believe it until I saw the infected running through the city with nothing to guide them, nothing but their rage.

Bill always did like disgusting things.

Bill noticed something different about a corpse we found and knelt down for further inspection. Said they were changing. Changing into what? The sound of a woman crying took our attention away from the corpse. A survivor? I never thought I'd see another face outside of the group again. Turns out I wouldn't. When Bill and I got closer Bill saw it was another infected and quickly turned off my light. Things would only go from bad to worse when a horde came out of nowhere. Louis came in to warn us only for his flashlight to provoke the Witch and cause her to attack.

We ran and fought our way through the horde. New mutations we've never seen before came at us from every side. Smoker, Boomer, Hunter, and worse of all the Tank. A large monstrosity that if I never saw again as long as I lived it would be too soon. We managed to escape to a rooftop where we learn of an evacuation point by Mercy Hospital from a passing helicopter. Our nightmare was just getting started.

The hospital is really the last place you want to go during a zombie outbreak, but some things can't be helped.

Truth be told, I can't remember a lot of what happened between the rooftop and the helipad. We restocked on our equipment and took off without a moment's hesitation. All I had was a pistol and a fully automatic rifle. Managed to grab a second pistol later on and felt like Lara Croft. Always did prefer twin pistols, and anything with a scope. Makes taking off heads a hell of a lot easier.

I remember getting hit by a Boomer. Green slime covering my body luring in the horde. I couldn't see a smurfing thing! Just shot whenever something got too close. Some times I shot my teammates. Not proud of it. Maybe if they didn't CONSTANTLY get in my way I wouldn't have shot them so damn much! Why am I the only one expected to crouch down when I take point?

“Get to the choppa!” Sorry, I couldn't resist.

Once we made radio contact with the pilot we had to hold out until he arrived. They came in droves and I thought it'd never end. Why couldn't we get the slow as hell zombies like in Resident Evil? No, we had to deal with 28 Days Later bulltrout!

Good news? We made it to the chopper. Bad news? The pilot was infected and I had to put a bullet in his head. Not a pretty sight. Our next stop was Riverside which we heard was free from infection. Worth checking out, at least.

Any hope we had of Riverside being a safe place to hide out vanished when we found an enraged lunatic at the church who rang the bell to notify the horde just so he didn't have to share his safe room with us. He was as good as dead, anyway. Our next goal was to escape by boat. That one ended up more of a chore than last time.

I got turned around and while trying to make it back to the group I was overwhelmed by zombies. To make matters worse there was a Tanker on my ass while trying to make it to the boat. Bill was there to help while the others was already on the boat. I thought I was going to die right there, but even though I was as slow as a snail I managed to make it. I should have died a thousand times over, and yet, somehow I'm still breathing.

When it came time for me to return the favor, it was too late. Bill was grabbed by a Smoker and the rest of us had already dropped down to the next rooftop with no way to get back up. He was lost. I never felt trouttier for anything in my entire life.

Mere moments later we found another survivor who looked and sounded like Bill. He was even dressed in the same clothes and had the same name. Weird. I gave him my health pack, as if that would somehow make up for my failure of saving the last Bill.

I made the stupid ass move of shooting a Witch after hearing her cry. Not sure what I was thinking. Didn't even recognize her until I shot her and she nearly took my head off. God knows I wouldn't make it on the streets if I was alone. I can barely see anything out here. Whenever I turn at the sound of gunfire I have to look around just to see where the damn things are coming from. This flashlight isn't worth trout.

As if I needed another reason not to get on a plane.

We managed to make it to the airport and waited for a military C-130 Hercules to pick us up. This was starting to become routine. After a while even the Tankers weren't scaring me anymore. They have become routine. Was this really the life I wanted? Just going from point A to point B shooting up zombies, stopping at safe houses, and holding out until rescue came? Not like I had much choice in the matter.

At least this time I got to fire a sub-machine gun at the horde. Not that it did much good in the end. Zombies kept coming from behind me to the left and right and the gun could only turn so far, yet for whatever stupid reason I kept firing from it. After all, it was a sub-machine gun! Didn't mean trout when that Tanker showed up. Where's the Incredible Hulk when I need him? Come out of nowhere and maul your stupid ass!

Hm. Wouldn't make a bad poster for a movie, honestly.

As you can probably guess by now, the plane that saves us crashes and we're left on our own again. This time traveling through a forest having to follow train tracks to find our way out. Bill really shouldn't let me lead anymore. I ended up getting turned around so bad we backtracked all the way back to the safe house. Francis wasn't about to let me hear the end of that one. Oops! Sorry, Francis! I didn't mean to hit you...

Following the train tracks led us to the military base, but it was abandoned. Of course it was. Why should we expect anything to go right now? Every time we get rescued either the vehicle we're in go down or we're right back where we started. Luckily, hope wasn't completely lost. I got to a radio transmission just in time to prompt the military to send an APC our way. All we had to do was hold out.

By this point I wasn't even worried. I just kept filling these things with led until backup arrived. There never seems to be enough bullets, though. When I didn't have time to reload I'd just switch to the next weapon. When the swarm surrounds you you'll soon find just how much time reloading takes away from you.

In the end we came out on top like we always did and were escorted away by the U.S. army. Guess I should be happy our military didn't end up like the one from 28 Days Later. I'm not above shooting a man in the dick. We could finally put this nightmare behind us and find whatever peace we could get from a world torn apart. Huh? What the smurf is downloadable content?

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5,234 zombies were harmed during the making of this review.

Originally published on 12.12.11

Transformers, more than meets the eye. Yeah, this has nothing to do with Transformers. This is an action, third person shooter, Mecha simulation developed by From Software in Japan. So, it's more like every single Anime to ever do with fighting robots.

The game takes place in what we can only assume is some time in the future after a major event simply dubbed The Great Destruction (and I thought my titles were bland) wiped out the majority of Earth's population leaving those who survived the event to live underground where powerful companies rose to power. The two most noticeable being Murakumo Millennium, and Chrome. Wait a minute. Chrome?

All your Mecha are belong to us.

Being the two largest companies they're in a constant battle for supremacy. This of course gives a mercenary organization by the name of Ravens' Nest the perfect opportunity to cash in on the competition. This is where you come in. Of course, they don't just let anyone in. After you choose the name for your pilot, get ready to be sucked right into the action because the game starts off with a test to become a Raven.

The main menu consists of the garage, top ten Raven rankings, email, missions, the shop, and system data. In the garage you can modify your current Mecha, assembling different parts you can purchase from the shop, giving it a paint job, etc.

Selecting the gun titled Missions will give you a list of jobs, showing you the award money for each signifying its difficulty, and the missions you perform will advance the story accordingly. Some missions offer bonuses and others threaten deduction if certain terms mentioned in the mission briefing are not met. At the end of each job you do you'll see a screen which lists the awards, cost of the mission, your balance, and then the total of money you have remaining. Ammunition and parts, as you would imagine, are expensive so the more ammunition you use up, and the more damage you take, the more cash that is deducted from your pay. It's basically like winning a million dollars on a game show, by the time you're finished paying taxes on it you have half of what you started out with.

Now, it is possible to get into debt with this game. Once your cash starts going into the negatives it's a good idea to start selling some parts in the shop to help you get back on your feet. If you die during a mission you won't get a Game Over right away, but you will lose money. With each mission you succeed your success rate goes up, points are gathered and you may even find yourself on the top ten Ravens list.

Story is mainly told through emails and mission briefings. There are very few FMVs throughout the game and the few that are there aren't anything spectacular. The opening FMV that plays before the title screen is pretty much the only one that's worth watching.

On top of Scenario Mode the game gives us a VS Mode for two players play, but it isn't anything great. Basically, you just set up your Mecha, choose your stage and battle against each other on a split screen.

There's a problem with the graphics on a level which only becomes apparent on missions where there's a secret access. The only hints you get to a secrete passage is through cracks on the walls, or by seeing it from a side view. Problem is, with the graphics the way they are there are times where you see lines in walls that leads you to believe there's a secret passage when there isn't. Aside from that though, graphics are what you can expect from 1997.

The game has a tendency to lag during stages where you have a lot of enemies on screen. It's not the worst lag you'll ever experience in your life, but it still has a risk of getting you killed.

Despite its flaws, Armored Core offers an enjoyable gaming experience and the fact that you never see your main character, or any humans at all really, allows you to become that character and imagine yourself inside the Mecha kicking ass! If you're a fan of third person shooters, giant robots blowing stuff up, and/or letting your imagination run wild, I would recommend giving Armored Core a go.

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Hello and welcome to ToriJ's Video Game Reviews. Two years ago I reviewed the first installment of the series “Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney.” Hard to believe it's been two years since I played a Phoenix Wright game.

Believe it or not, Phoenix Wright was the sole reason I bought a Nintendo DS. After being introduced to it through a YouTube Let's Play, though I remember seeing something about it in Nintendo Power and wanting it then, I just had to have it. So, I went out, bought a DS, and then got the first game and it was worth every penny.

I plan to continue my journey with Phoenix Wright, but I'm not alone. Today I have a very special guest. A fellow critic who specializes in Visual Novels: Karifean!

Take it away, Karifean!

Karifean: Justice For All is the second game in the Ace Attorney series. Like its predecessor, it follows the story of Phoenix Wright, a defense attorney, as he defends his clients in courts from being wrongly convicted.

Opposing him are self-centered prosecutors that would go to any lengths to get a “Guilty” verdict. It's up to you to investigate crime scenes and question witnesses to ultimately bring the truth to light and expose the real criminal.

This guy must have gotten caught in one of the riots. Too soon?

Karifean: In terms of gameplay not much has changed from the first game; it follows the same standard formula but brings some new concepts to the table. Namely, during the second case of the game you get the ability to see people's lies being manifested as locks, so-called “Psyche Locks,” which you can break using evidence to reveal whatever that person may be hiding.

I found them to be quite a good addition to the usual investigating since they work as kind of an inference phase where you recall all the testimony and evidence you've found and put together all the pieces of the puzzle to see just what you've actually learned.

ToriJ: While I appreciate their use, I can't help but groan every time a Psyche Lock reels its ugly... lock... Come on, I'm just asking a simple question. STOP HAVING SO MANY smurfING SECRETS AND ANSWER!

But this is less an actual criticism of the Psyche Locks and more a compliment to the game's ability to immerse you into the story. I felt as Phoenix did, being hit by road block, after road block and being exhausted by the end of it all.

Another addition to the game is the utilization of character profiles as evidence. Instead of just looking at them through the Court Records like before you can choose to present them while talking to witnesses and use them in court to further prove your case. A small change, but still provides a new dimension to a simple formula.

No, I'm talking to the other lawyer in a blue suit with spiky hair.

Karifean: The game is mostly linear, albeit with the player being given free reign during the investigation phases. There are no branching storyline paths, although there is one bad ending. The exclamation marks from the first game that represent how many times you can screw up are replaced by a life bar, which allows for more variable penalties. Justice For All also reduces the amount of days for a trial to two instead of the original's three, which I consider a welcome change as it fixed some pacing issues I had with the first game.

ToriJ: I thought I remembered something about trials being three days. I was taken aback at first when there were only two, not that I'm complaining. I can't believe I used to go through three separate court scenes. I must have blocked it out in my trauma or something.

You'd think it'd be because the victim had a broken neck, but nope!

Karifean: As for the overall story, Justice For All is a bit unfortunately sandwiched between the first and third games which both had incredibly engaging plots, but the story is still quite good. It expands upon plot threads introduced in the first game such as the Fey family's channeling powers, and it certainly lives up to the series' standard of having an absolutely amazing final case.

On the mystery side, the game is pretty good about having its reveals be deductible ahead of time; at least by the start of the second trial day there are enough clues to put the rest of the puzzle pieces together yourself, if you like doing that. Even if you don't, it's just as enjoyable to wait and see everything fall into place all on its own.

ToriJ: The game's cases follow a similar pattern to the first, the first case is about lovers; the second has Maya as the accused; the third is centered around a bizarre bunch of characters; and the fourth is an “All or nothing” battle where you can't afford to make the tiniest mistake.

At first it feels like they're recycling, but the deeper you dig the better it gets. By the second case the game really picks up steams and never fails to impress. The third case in particular stands out to me because there is no clear “bad guy” in all of it. Everyone from the guilty down to the victim all seem like good people and you genuinely feel bad for them.

If your heart doesn't melt for this girl, THEN YOU ARE MADE OF STONE!

Karifean: The characters are just as great as before. Maya reprises her role as Phoenix's assistant and Gumshoe returns as the main detective. New to the series are Maya's younger cousin Pearl as well as Manfred von Karma's daughter, Franziska, an 18-year-old prosecutor prodigy who ends up being the main opposing prosecutor in this game.

And of course, every case has its own little cast of colorful characters you get to interact with for a good 5-10 hours. Pretty much all of those side characters are well-written and serve their purpose well. There are a few single characters I didn't care for, but apart from those I have no complaints. A good case lives and dies with its cast and Ace Attorney manages to keep it strong at all times.

ToriJ: Although, if Franziska was a real prosecutor she would've been hauled off to jail for assaulting a judge, and a detective, and a lawyer, and several different witnesses! That's not even including the tracking device she planted on a member of LAW ENFORCEMENT! Really, why hasn't this woman been charged yet? I can count at least eight different cases of assault with a deadly weapon! But damn if she doesn't come through for you in the end.

I agree that all the side characters are written well, and I love the main cast. Maya is my favorite character for being so upbeat and Pearl is just the cutest thing I've ever saw! Detective Gumshoe is always a treat to be around and he also comes through for you big time in the end. And don't worry Edgeworth fans, you'll see him in his usual role before the end. At the end of the day this game actually managed to make me like lawyers.

Nothing will ever beat that sound.

Karifean: Justice For All replaces the OST from the first game with an all-new soundtrack. As someone who loved the previous soundtrack this change was a bit unwelcome to me, but several of the new tracks are really good and it undeniably still fits the series very well. And on the off occasion that one of the original tracks does make a return, the nostalgic feeling that accompanies it is overwhelming.

ToriJ: So much time has passed since I played the first game, that I didn't even notice the change. Obviously I know there are several new soundtracks that I agree fit the series, and I recognize several tracks from the first game. Mainly in places like the office and the courtroom. The song that plays when you cry out “OBJECTION!” is still by far my favorite track.

Don't say it, Maya!

Karifean: Overall, Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney – Justice For All is certainly a worthy successor to the original. Everything lovable from the first game makes a return and while it doesn't have the kind of overarching storyline the other games in the series all have, its individual cases are very strong, and the final case is definitely one of the most thrilling cases in the series.

The Psyche Locks went on to become series staples, featuring in every mainline Ace Attorney game from there on, and the lore established through Maya's hometown and extended family also runs deep through the entire franchise. And while it may not be quite as amazing as the first or third games, it's a game to be appreciated regardless and a very important chapter in Phoenix's story.

ToriJ: Wait, you're telling me that these become series staples? I'm going to have to deal with MORE of them down the road? REVIEWER TORIJ CHOOSES DEATH!

On second thought, death sucks. Reviewer ToriJ chooses life.

Well, I haven't played the third game yet, but I agree that Justice for All is an enjoyable game possessing a good moral story for why lawyers and prosecutors do what they do. The fourth and final case alone is worth playing through the game for just to experience it. By the ending I actually had a smile on my face.

Karifean: Get it
ToriJ: Get it

Originally published on 12.19.11

Capcom. Who here hasn't heard the name of the Japanese company best known for their work on Mega Man, Street Fighter, Ghosts'n Goblins, Resident Evil, and Devil May Cry? Even if you aren't familiar with them, chances are you heard one of these games listed above. In 1999 with the success of the survivor horror games, Resident Evil, it only made sense to further cash in with a new title, and that brings us to this week's review.

The game stars Regina, an intelligent weapons expert voiced by Stephanie Morgenstern. Where have I heard that voice before?

Oh my god, it's Sailor V!

Regina, alongside her comrades Gail, Rick, and Cooper, drop down on Isla Nublar Ibis Island where they are on a mission to find Doctor Edward Kirk. A man who was believed to be dead, but was discovered to be alive during a recon mission, said to be in charge of a secret weapons project prompting our agents to investigate the area.

Disaster strikes when our beloved Cooper, a man we've known for under a minute, is blown away from the others as they parachute down and is taken away from us tragically by a Tyrannosaurus Rex! It's okay. I'm sure our heroes will go looking for him and avenge his death!

Gail: Leave him.

He was only a plot device anyway.

With Cooper out of the picture it's up to Regina, Rick, and Gail to finish the mission. Reaching the guard house they find that something is wrong as there is no one nearby. Rick enters the facility to secure the control room while Regina and Gail are left to survey the outside area and we're finally allowed to move the main character around.

Now, if you've played Resident Evil you're going to notice a lot of similarities not just in graphics and game play, but in the controls. Unlike Resident Evil however, you can move around with your weapon at the ready. This comes in handy if you need to fire straight away, but you can't run in this state.

The game focus less on action and more on suspense and puzzles. You never know when a dinosaur is going to show up on screen and there are many puzzles throughout the game you'll have to solve in order to progress further. The story isn't anything amazing, but it's not terrible either. The banter between characters is pretty fun. Like for example when they lose Gail in the beginning (boy they don't keep track of their teammates very well)

Rick: Good news. I've got the control system back online! What's the situation over there?
Regina: It's Gail. I've lost him.
Rick: So, what's the bad news?

Another feature includes your character being thrown into life or death situations. You need to tap on buttons very quickly in order to avoid certain death. In other words, they're a bunch of Quick Time Events before they were common.

The inventory allows you to sort out your supplies, items, and examine items and weapons. You can also create new items or update some with the mix tool. Like Resident Evil, if your inventory is full there are certain rooms you can go to to empty it out.

If you've played Resident Evil, you've basically played this game. I understand that it was made by the same people, but would it have killed them to at least try to make this different? Aside from a few minor differences, Dino Crisis is basically Resident Evil meets Jurassic Park.

It doesn't just copy game play mechanics and graphics, it even copies story points. The member of the teammate you know virtually nothing about dies in the opening FMV, the buildup to meeting the first enemy of the game, etc. Hey, at least the first Resident Evil had a better reason for why they couldn't just call in the chopper.

Rick: I say what we outta do is call in the chopper and get off this deathtrap.
Regina: That's a great idea, but Cooper has the radio and he's missing.

That's right. They only have one radio. What, did they blow all their money on the cool outfits?

Anyway, Dino Crisis isn't a terrible suspense thriller. The voice actors for the game are decent, and the characters are fun. I just believe the game better qualities are buried by the fact it's basically a Resident Evil clone. If they could've just found a way to give the game its own identity I think they could have had something great.

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I smurfing love Phoenix Wright. Easily one of my top video game series. You should definitely carry on playing the series Tori as it only get better from the second one.

In regards to the cases, I'd agree with your assessment. If you do play on more Tori, you'll notice patterns developing in the third and final cases respectively. The final case is always the massive climax case (and how in No.3!) and is usually very difficult. But the third cases are always very... goofy. Not goofy, but definitely much more humorous. I like how the pattern is set. It just gives you something to look forward to building up to the third case.

I find Maya equally fabulous as you do but Gumshoe is one of my favorite characters. You also mentioned the music you two: I actually like how the music changes each game. It gives each game a distinctive feeling; each game has their own objection theme, their own cross-examination theme, and it gets my blood pumping when I start to hear the allegro version of the cross-examination music.

Great reviews, both of you. You should definitely carry on with the series Tori. If you can play the Professor Layton series as well, that'd be awesome so you can play the crossover between the two.

Whoa, caught up. Nice review on Wold Among Wallstreet Us! I thought it got silly at the very end (action wise), but it was another solid entry from Telltale ultimately!