The first time I tried tofu, I was 10 years old. There was something about it in the class I was in... I don’t know, we were being taught how to bake with it or some :skull::skull::skull::skull:. Anyway, not many people wanted to eat it, so many gave me their slice. I was like some kind of machine; some wild-eyed tofu fiend, ready to dispose of any unwanted tofu. YES. But a freak, also. Mostly a freak. I lost a crown that year. Not a real crown, mind you, but a crown nevertheless. In that goddamn hedge that seemed to gobble everything up... I returned several years later to shake the bush down, hoping to unload a cache of lost treasure that had accumulated over the years... bam! Just my luck the bush had been cut down on the days building up to my return. Yes... the new swine of a principal had it cut down for some tiki that some poor children were forced to carve. Bah, it was no big deal. So what? Some crown I didn’t even need. Why did I even have that crown? Oh, I remember now. It wasn’t mine. It was my friend’s. I had to write him an apology note because I lost it. Damn, if I could have returned that crown to him ten years later... sweet indeed. Well, I guess I can fantasize. *doo ododoo*
