OMG, YOU WERE THAT CREEPY TOPLESS OVERSIZED BALD CREATURE OF UNKNOWN ORIGIN?
I was behind you, always, pulling silly faces.
You were supposed to turn up for my birthday party as my imaginery BFF. Where were you?
Well, everyone has their fetishes, I suppose. Merry Birthmas!
I saw a monkey wanking at a zoo and thought of you. This is scary.
...but it's July? omg Christmas in July!
Endure no nut November!
What must I do for forgiveness? Crimes, obviously.
You are not forgiven.
Apparently, you aged recently. Apologies for missing it. Happy belated!
