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Mercen-X

Dealing With Demons

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Surprise! I'm back.

(SPOILER)
Quote Originally Posted by Vincent, Thunder God View Post
I agree that people have to adapt to those who are different or seem a bit odd/strange, it also falls upon the individual to then modify his or her own behaviour as well, as far as it is within their own powers and ability to do so - and usually a lot of it is.

Therapy is a viable option for those who can afford it, but be further advised that this too has inherent problems if your psychologist is inclined to kowtow to the psychiatrists and just blindly follow down whatever path they choose.

So I guess my point is, yeah, it's both the responsibility of the person who has the illness or disability to take action, just as it is vital for those who interact with them to respect them in that attempt (within reason, because God knows people like my Dad really don't make much effort in that regard) - but if you're trying to seek help, as hard as it's going to be, realize ONLY YOU can save yourself - not your doctor, not your friends, not your family, YOU. Don't lean on others when you can support yourself because ultimately it'll be unhealthy for everyone involved and you will NOT get better.
I'm pretty sure my ex is bipolar if not something else.



However, she and I share a psychological quirk in that we tend to spew a load of personal information at anyone who is "there to listen" (remains and possibly asks questions), whereas I tend to put people off by being too open about my life, personal, past, dreams, etc., her habit often causes her to reveal her weaknesses to stronger people (men) which make it easier for them to use them against her to take advantage. All of her relationships have thus far been in part derived of her loneliness in missing her dad but lately not being able to socialize with her other friends caused her to be "isolated from the pack" as it were.
She has been repeatedly asking me if and how she will stop allowing herself to get too close too fast. With me, she had gotten lucky in that I desired a deeper relationship but she's afraid of the next mistake she may make. At the moment, I'm the only one she really confides in because she sees me more often than her other all-too-busy friends and as she's unwilling to seek professional counsel because "they're sellouts", I'm the closest thing she has to a therapist. My concern for her feelings and her future are genuine and, at times, overwhelming. I have tried to be supportive but I don't know what to tell her when she asks me. I mean I've told her to remember her feelings are more important than the feelings of a guy she wants to say no to.
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Comments

  1. Formalhaut's Avatar
    Sheesh, I dread to think how insecure her facebook page is.

    I don't personally have much of an issue with people saying things about their personal life. If their too much for some people, they know what they can do can't they?

    As for your ex-girlfriend turned friend, you need to remind her that turning men down in a relationship is always a bad thing. Hell, you two seem pretty good friends anyway. She needs to.. be slightly more selfish? As I see it, she's too concerned with upsetting the guy she's with and therefore doesn't want call it a day. While that is admirable, she needs to be slightly more self-subservient.

    Is that sort in the ballpark Mercen?
  2. jenovajunkie's Avatar
    Well she just needs the ol' Carl Rogers quote on self-actulization. This is not hard stuff, well actually it is.

    You have to remind her of who she is, empower her. Mercen-X you have to treat this as a problem, and not with emotions. You are allowing yourself to care too much. You won't solve if you care about her. Harsh but that's how it is, I'm not saying be a dick. Just consider every possibility.

    I want to know more so please tell me. I want to help.
  3. Tigmafuzz's Avatar
    Drive a wooden stake through her heart.
  4. Futan's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by Tigmafuzz
    Drive a wooden stake through her heart.