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Shlup

Newsflash: I'm Stupid

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18 Comments
by
Shlup
, 02-15-2012 at 08:12 AM (2318 Views)
Yesterday I was getting dolled up for my valentine when I thought "Golly, my pores sure are full of heinous particulates." Fortunately, I knew just who would have the solution: <a href="http://pinterest.com/instantpudding/">Pinterest</a>. That site is all about collecting household remedies.

And, lo, did I find that <a href="http://pinterest.com/pin/89720217546048501/">1 tbs sugar + 1 tbs baking soda + 1 tbs water + 20 minutes = clean face</a>. So I decided to try it. Unfortunately, I can't go more than a few minutes without sticking things in my mouth, so while I'm mixing my bukkake facial (if you had seen it, you would know there's no other appropriate name for it; however, if you don't know what that means, don't Google it) and I absentmindedly taste it. Turns out baking soda tastes like gym mats--I spit it out. I needed to get the taste out of my mouth, so I grab a clementine orange and pop its naked flesh into my mouth.

Yeah. I ate citrus fruit right after putting baking soda in my mouth. Words cannot describe.

Anyway, twenty minutes later my face looked and felt amazing. Highly recommend will try again A++.
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Comments

  1. Tigmafuzz's Avatar
    Baking soda, then orange. I don't even. But congrats on the clean face?
  2. Freya's Avatar
    I may have to try this... Not the orange part pft.
  3. Shlup's Avatar
    The water measurement isn't exact; just add a smidge at a time until it looks like semen. It's easy to add too much and make to too runny.
  4. Quindiana Jones's Avatar
    Recommend bukkake?

    It's strange how almost every household remedy uses baking soda. xD
  5. Slothy's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by ShlupQuack
    Newsflash: I'm Stupid
    I had some suspicions but you said it, not me.
  6. Shlup's Avatar
    Baking soda is a wonderful item. I mix my own household cleaners and it's in most of them.
  7. Jiro's Avatar
    Aren't you allergic to oranges?
  8. Raistlin's Avatar
    I am shocked, SHOCKED, at this revelation.
  9. Shlup's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by Jiro
    Aren't you allergic to oranges?
    No. Just pineapples and blueberries.
  10. Shiny's Avatar
    hahahaha

    yes baking soda is good.
  11. Tigmafuzz's Avatar
    Who would've guessed bukkake was good for cleaning faces.
  12. fire_of_avalon's Avatar
    I lol'd
  13. Peegee's Avatar
    :D
    I saw this on your blag
    I was lolling and now you publicised it here, so I get to laugh at you some more :D
  14. Shlup's Avatar
    Fairly often I start a blog entry here and then I think "...Why am I not posting it to my actual blog?" So I did.
  15. NorthernChaosGod's Avatar
    So the Internet just tells me that citrus + baking power = gross. So you had a gross tasting, white liquid in your mouth and on your face that you spit out?
  16. Shlup's Avatar
    Think about what happens when you mix acids and basis, darling. You never made a volcano in elementary school?
  17. krissy's Avatar
    baking soda is amazing for everything

    except yeah anything with an acid nearby
  18. Freya's Avatar
    I tried the bakingsoda sugar water thing. It seems to have done a decent job but yeah I added too much water and by then I was like "TOO LATE, CAN'T GO BACK NOW" It dried my skin out a bit though.