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Laddy

GAYEST RANT EVER

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OH MY GOOOOOOOOOD

The kids at my school have the style of a Sunday School teacher. It's boring, bland, overly conservative, and largely consiting of only three brands. (Hollister, Aeropostale, and American Eagle.) THAT IS NOT THE POINT OF FASHION. You're supposed to make a statement, if you're going to dress exactly. the. same. then why bother?

I order my clothes online (imported from Japan, France, and England) and go to stores like Express, Banana Republic, and Passport. It's upsetting so very few people are aware of these brands at my school. A GUY CAN WEAR A PEA COAT YOU KNOOOOOW. There is nothing fashionable about your dad's hand-we-down hunting jacket, and I'd rather have sex with Shlup than wear one of those.

Speaking of which, why is everyone so idiotic about homosexuality at my school? I am clearly male. So, why do you ask if I want to be referred to as a she? Oh, and asking if I'm a top or a bottom IS NOT AN ICEBREAKER AND IF YOU DON'T KNOW THE ANSWER TO THAT ALREADY YOU ARE STOOPID. Oh, and ladies? I do not want to wear your heels. Ever. And queue for guy-scouting shopping trips is getting ridiculous. I'm honestly considering charging for my services.

Your gay step-cousin is not automatically part of my interests. In fact. just because you're a guy doesn't mean I have the hots for you. And yes, I am a complete queen but not all gay guys are, in fact, queeny guys are a turn off for me. (I'm a sucker (kekeke) for black dreadlocked Bohemians, actually.)

Someday, me and some girl EoFFers are going shopping. (Rod too!)

Comments

  1. Shlup's Avatar
    People express themselves in many ways, and not everyone is interested in doing it through what they wear. I love your "Why are these people not aware of these brands?!" outrage. xD

    Do people really ask you if you want to be referred to using feminine pronouns? lawl

    Also, die.
  2. Laddy's Avatar
    But that's the thing, they are trying to express themselves.

    And why do I need to die? D:
  3. Shlup's Avatar
    Oh wait, of course having sex with me would be better than wearing any article of clothing. I take it back.

    And maybe they are trying to express that they don't need to be all kinds of "out there" to be who they are.
  4. Laddy's Avatar
    True, true, I'm not really that shallow.

    However, that's not the case. It's not about defiance: it's supposed to be about fashion and they're missing the point of it, is all.
  5. Bunny's Avatar
    Whenever I enter a Hollister, Aeropostale, or American Eagle store, I can actually feel part of my soul dying. I also get headaches because they smell like a guido's ass.
  6. Shlup's Avatar
    My sister-in-law works at AE so I get 50% off. xD

    And BJ used to love Hollister 'cause he wore a medium. Haha
  7. Rye's Avatar
    I actually like the smell of Hollister, but I can't really fit into much there, so MEH.
  8. Laddy's Avatar
    They keep the lights dim for a reason in there. Seriously, what other store requires you to buy stuff you can't smurfing see?