kikimm
is a rookie adventurer
RX Queen
Recognized Member

My dad's wife was born 3 years before me.

Dads seem to be incapable of being cool.

When I was a child there was an old woman that lived in my walls. After my parents put me to bed, she'd wait for them to leave then she would start telling me things I didn't want to hear about. I couldn't lie on my back so I had to lie on my left arm otherwise I would be looking at her. Most of the time this made her mad and she would make gorillas stand at the head of my bed to intimidate me. I would usually ignore them and they'd go away but sometimes I just didn't like it and I would scream at them to go away and dad would get angry at me.

I bet you used to roll yourself up like a taco in a blanket when you were a kid. It's time to emerge from the cocoon as a beautiful butterfly!

Autocunnilingist.

Feminist.

She's one of those thinking girls.

But girlfriends are supposed to be secondary mothers doesn't she understand? She won't go anywhere in life with an attitude like that.

I used to have a girlfriend that stayed with me, but these were the grounds she left me on:

• I am not your mother.

You need a wife.