Rowan
is a Frocobo

Hai guyz what's going on in here

I'm not sure I can be more clear, but I'll try: Please stop making assertions about me and try to stick to what is actually being discussed. If you would like to go on a tangent about another belief you think I may have, it would be a better use of our time if you were to avoid stating it as though it were already a fact. Making assertions about someone and building your point on a really valid point and i'm impressed by your thinking. isn't an appropriate or polite thing to do in the first place, so it's definitely not appropriate for you to then call me out for not defending myself against those assertions.

I'm sure you've also read what I've actually said and it's your right to disagree with me, but the way you've attributed things I haven't said to me several times leads me to believe that you've already decided, based on the labels that, again, you put on me, what I must believe. I think it would be a better use of our time if you either stuck to discussing what was actually being said or asking me if I believed certain things instead of arguing with straw men, but I don't control you.

And I know I probably sound condescending. I'm sorry about that; I admit I'm one of those people that sees logical fallacies and tsk tsks about it even though I try to phrase it nicely. I don't think poorly of you in spite of my irritation with your "label and dismiss" tactics.

I think the difference is that I don't agree with your view on a culture that perpetuates rape. Things like asking a girl to show her tits, however crudely worded, does not perpetuate a culture of rape, in my opinion. Robin Thick's song, however lame, does not encourage rape.

You seem to have gone off on a tangent on something we weren't talking about, and are crediting me with it. We were talking about whether treating crime as a fact of life and making potential victims equally responsible for preventing themselves from being victimized increases the acceptability of those crimes within a culture. Whether or not verbal assault and glamorizing sexual assault perpetuate rape culture is a completely different topic.

I think a lot of the time the idea of "every man is a potential rapist", scares women to the point where they feel uncomfortable having a conversation with a man who's just trying to be friendly (see elevator-gate).

That's a part of the point I was making.

I find it really odd that you'd credit me with a list of points I didn't try to make.

Do you on an individual level find crime acceptable? I'm sure you don't. I'm talking about the cultural influence of telling people it's their responsibility to prevent themselves from becoming victims. I'll just say, again, when you say "If you don't want nasty comments then don't put yourself on webcam" it's the same thing, though to a lesser degree, than saying "If you don't want to be assaulted then cover up with a berka."

I'm not interested in policing thoughts. I'm interested in facilitating a society that holds people accountable for their anti-social behavior, not the victims of that behavior.

We're talking about gender because the thread was titled "Being a girl on the internet."

If you tell people "You need to prevent yourself from being a victim because crime happens," you're putting the onus to protect themselves on them. Again, I'm not saying frolic down a dark alley with a hat made of $100 bills, but, objectively speaking, if you look at areas where crime is accepted as "inevitable" the more inevitable the crime becomes. When you say "If you don't want nasty comments then don't put yourself on webcam" it's the same thing, though to a lesser degree, than saying "If you don't want to be assaulted then cover up with a berka."

I'm not twisting your words; I'm drawing a parallel to a more extreme example.

I accept that bad things happen, but once you accept that those bad things are inevitable those things become more acceptable within the culture. The more people say "This is just the way it is; it's your expectations that need to change," the worse the situation gets. Is that not obvious to you?

Firstly, I think you're underestimating what percentage of people verbally assaulting others online are adults. Secondly, yes, I can expect them to behave. And, if they don't, I should be able to expect that they be held accountable by the proper authorities. I should expect their parents to raise them better and monitor them.

How is telling me that I shouldn't expect teenagers to not verbally assault people any different than telling me that I shouldn't expect men to not touch pretty girls without permission?

What teenagers? Just in general we can't expect teenagers not to be trout?